whats the best way to handle anger management in a 7 yr old?

Lindsay - posted on 11/09/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

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ok so my 7 year old girl, has ADHD and she is on medication for it. However i notice that even after changing the dosages and medications she has the worst anger management problems i have ever seeen. at first i just thought she wanted attention but now im noticing that its constant. if she doesnt get her way she screams hits kicks and dlately she dumped an entire bottle of shampoo down the drain because it wasn't the "scent" that she wanted. her sister is constantly the focal point of her agression, i need a new outlook and any help is better because she is wearing my patience and grounding and timeout and privileges being taken away nothing is getting through.



thanks

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Evelyn - posted on 11/12/2012

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I am a mother of twins and I sometimes have to deal with problems of "jealousy" between the two. I don't know if this will help. When things calm down, talk to her, explain to her that you love her very much and you love her exactly the same as her sister. If you think that what she asks for is wrong, do not give in. Stay firm but stay calm.Make her talk to you about how she feels and reassure her you can find a solution together. Make her feel that what she wants to say is important to you but explain you wouldn't sit down to hear it if she acts out like she does sometimes. If she starts a tantrum, tell her she needs time to calm down and that you will talk in a few minutes.. In my opinion she is angry because she can not express in words what she feels. She needs help there. If she can not "speak" her feelings, she may want to draw, or write down her thoughts or she may simply want a hug from you to calm down before she tries to say something. Yes you are right, she wants your attention but in the wrong way.In case she does not give you the chance to talk just say"you don't have to act like this, i love you anyway. If you spoil or break down things, if you shout, you just make noise and i can not understand what you really want. In this way we can not spend more time together, play or solve problems.Come and talk to me. I am all ears" I hope it will help.

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