How to ditch the pacifier without the screaming?!?!?

Carrie - posted on 08/10/2010 ( 12 moms have responded )

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My almost 3 yr old still uses a pacifier. She always has it, lately I've been trying to wean her, but lately she screams and kicks and will NOT sleep without it. She stayed up until 3 screaming for the darn thing, so I caved and gave her the paci so I could sleep. There has to be an easier way. Help!

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Cyndel - posted on 01/22/2011

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A woman I know started very slow. She took the pacifier away except at nap and bed time. Until she had stopped asking for it for two days. Then she took it away during nap time for about two weeks. You may not need to wait that long or you may need to give her more time, you know your daughter and her signals.
Then she took it away at night to. It was a gradual but simple process. It took about 3 weeks. She talked to her daughter about it for about a week before she started taking it away. And talked with her about it through the whole process, letting her know she was a big girl and could always come to mommy to cuddle when she missed her paci.
I would make sure nothing else is going on at the time though. Like vacation, a stay in visitor, changing from a toddler bed to a big bed, potty training, etc. Too much stress will make it much more difficult on you both.
I hope this helps!

Nuriniatti - posted on 11/21/2010

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I used the same method as Katherine Strurrock to make my daughter stop from using bottle. Before she turned 3yrs old, I told her that when she is 3yrs old she will be a big girl. Big girl didn't need bottle to have her milk. When I said that, she told me that when she become 3yrs old, she will throw all her bottle herself & never use bottle again. And yes she did what she had said...

Katherine - posted on 11/19/2010

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A couple of friends used the idea of the "dummy fairy" who would bring a present which had to be paid for with the wee one's dummy. I tried that with my son but he couldn't decide what he wanted the "dummy fairy" to bring him so it fell by the wayside.

As he got closer to his third birthday, I stressed to him that he would be a big boy when he was three and big boys don't need dummies. He understood that once you are three, you've had your turn with the dummy and it then goes on to a new baby (lots of friends are having second babies right now so we chose which baby Steven's dummy would go to). The night before his birthday, I told him to enjoy the last night with his dummy as it would be going to a new baby the next day and he said he'd be alright without it. At bedtime on his birthday, he asked for his dummy but I said his turn had finished and it had gone to a new baby. The poor wee soul got really upset but was distracted with a couple of bedtime stories and went off to sleep alright. He asked for it for a few days after but I said we didn't have it and after a while he stopped mentioning it. I felt horrible taking his dummy off him in this way (what kind of mother makes her baby cry on his birthday?!) but it's turned out well in the long run.

Nuriniatti - posted on 10/26/2010

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I just wanna tell I'm lucky coz my daughter never had the paci. One of her aunt bought 1 for her, but I never give that paci to my daughter. I had a 5yrs old niece that still uses paci. It's really hard to make her forget about the paci.. why, coz her mum "teach" her to use paci from the beginning. Actually, it's better if we never "teach" our children to use paci. Doctor also not recommend it.. right? Hope your daughter can stop soon

Heather - posted on 10/21/2010

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My daughter only had her pacifier to sleep with and at about two and a half I snipped the a tiny hole in it. She immediately noticed and asked me about it. I explained very casually that as she got older her pacifier disappeared. She was happy with that answer and every week I snipped a tiny bit off. Finally there was just the base left and she would hold it up to her mouth and go to sleep like that. That slowly got old and she forgot where it was and that was the end of that. Not one tear was shed. It was slow but worked beautifully. Good luck!

Karen - posted on 09/28/2010

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I took my daughter's sucie away when I was pregnent with her little brother, she responds well to reason.I told her that the baby needed it ( that kinda backfired because he never took it, but she was none the wiser). My friend, however, had a brilliant idea. She cut a slit at the tip of the pacifier, it wasn't fun to suck anymore...her son became disinterested and threw it away himself.

Nicole - posted on 09/08/2010

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Try doing it gradually. The day my daughter turned 1, she was only allowed to have it at naps and bedtime or in the car, w/the exception of when she was sick. A few mths. later, it went to just bedtime and the car. Then it went to just bedtime. Then on her 2nd birthday, we warned her ahead of time that she was a big girl and babies needed nuks more than her, so it was gonna go bye-bye. And w/the exception of the 1st night, she had no problems w/it being gone. Good Luck!

Nicole - posted on 09/08/2010

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Try doing it gradually. The day my daughter turned 1, she was only allowed to have it at naps and bedtime or in the car, w/the exception of when she was sick. A few mths. later, it went to just bedtime and the car. Then it went to just bedtime. Then on her 2nd birthday, we warned her ahead of time that she was a big girl and babies needed nuks more than her, so it was gonna go bye-bye. And w/the exception of the 1st night, she had no problems w/it being gone. Good Luck!

Denise - posted on 08/17/2010

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we just "broke" our daughter of this habit...she will be 3 in a month...she has been binkie free for just over 2 weeks...we moved her to her big girl bed and when we did she "lost" her binkie because when the crib went away the binkie fairy came to take the binkies to a new baby who needed them....mommy and daddy and her big brother nick all sleep in big beds and we dont have binkies so therefore she didnt need one either...it took about a week of her asking nightly for it and not many tears about it just sad requests for it back but we would just tell her we didnt have them anymore (we didnt, when we decided it was time, we threw them in the garbage right then)...she has 2 taggie blankets she sleeps with and we would just say, here is your taggie, you can have this forever if you want, but your binkie is gone...there are no more binkies.....the 2nd week or so she mentioned it maybe 2 nights....the hardest part is just sticking with it....if you want it gone, you have to get rid of it all together....no going back, commit to getting rid of it and accept the screaming as a reality of the change....this too shall pass...i promise....the first night she cried for over an hour, the next night she was sad but no major crying, the next night just asking for it and so on....if you dont have it you cant give it....BUT you have to be ready mentally for the crying.....no caving in...commit and dont turn back, especially now since you gave in once she is going to expect you to give in every time and you will never get rid of it...good luck and stay strong....

Megan - posted on 08/15/2010

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There is no easier way. We're doing the same thing with our almost 3 yr old, and what is worse her younger brother (1 yr) uses one when he sleeps or is super cranky. What we had to do was just take it away and (we feel bad about it but) let her cry, it has been three weeks and she still wants it. She developed a "fear" of her room the first week and that has continued on, but she still wants it and continues to steal her brothers. We started on a weekend- to allow for the major disruption in everyones life-I wish you luck-she will eventually realize she doesn't need it.

Alice - posted on 08/11/2010

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Maybe let her have it and take it away after she's asleep? My girls all use(d) their fingers or thumbs or a blankie. You can't really take the body parts away lol, but they outgrow the blankies themselves. I also use carrots... let them chew on carrots (not when they are going to bed, though! serious choking hazard). My aunt got really tired of the paci when my cousin was 4 - she had gotten rid of all but one trying to get them all gone. So when they were riding a boat, my aunt knocked the paci in the water... she said that evening my cousin didn't even look for it.

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