In need of a friend!

Cara - posted on 03/25/2009 ( 8 moms have responded )

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Although my baby is just over 6 months, sleping through the night and is an over all, good baby, I still get a litle depressed every once in a while. My husband works 12 hour days, I have no family who live here and my (few) friends work all day and dont feel like doing anything at night. Ive tried joining mommy/baby yoga and other classes like that, but it didnt help. I take really good care of my daughter, but I feel like I let myself go!! Does any one else ever feel like this? Or any suggestions to help? Thank you!

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Rebekah - posted on 03/26/2009

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I understand.  I also feel like I let myself go as well.  Usually when I get that way, I pack up the baby and go to the mall, just walk around and enjoy some time out.  I too don't have family and I don't really have friends here, for I didn't grow up here and my husband works many hours, rarely get to see him anymore.  Other things I like to do are when the baby naps, go take a bath and read a book, or watch a movie that relaxes me.  I try to take breaks in between all the cleaning, laundry, dishes, bottles, and caring for the little guy - that's why I really appreciate the naps when he does go down. :)



I also joined a MOPS group, which is awesome.  For you go there and let someone else watch your kid (while your nearby) and they have activities, toys, and other stuff for the kids, while you get the opportunity to talk with other moms and enjoy food, activities, and other things.  I'd encourage you to look for one as well: www.mops.org

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Barbie - posted on 03/28/2009

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I def. know where you're coming from. My husband is serving our country right now & my family lives an hour away from me, except for my parents, w/ whom I live. I'm going to school right now & am on the President's List. I will fall asleep @ night highlighting things in my books so I can keep my grades up, plus I have to help take care of the house & pay rent & babysitting on top of it. I too have let myself go b/c it's like, who cares? Right? Well, now my husband's getting to come home for a short leave & I CARE! I am doing my best to try to lose what I'm convincing myself is just "baby weight" (it's totally not) & I am miserable. I don't really know how to be happy either, & my baby is one of the best I've ever seen - he's so well behaved, & whenever I'm crying I can look down to see him smiling up @ me. I guess my best advice would be just to look @ your baby & remember there's always someone that will love you, no matter how much we "let ourselves go". If you need a friend, I'm here. I think I'm in need of some as well :-D.

Rebecca - posted on 03/26/2009

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Keep trying the mommy groups, I am sure you will find a friend to be able to have some face to face adult time with.. or at least a mom you could switch off babysitting with so you can have a 'spa' day to take care of yourself.



I feel better when I make myself take a shower, get dressed and go for a walk outside every day.  Even if it is cold or raining, I just bundle us up.  Honestly that doesn't happen everyday, but it makes a difference when it does!

Jenny - posted on 03/26/2009

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I completely understand where you are coming  from...I feel like that all the time specially when my husband and I actually get to spend time together and I look at pictures from the past. I feel as if I have let myself go completely. Most of the time its just me taking care of my daughter because of my husbands job...so I feel so alone at times. Im not near anyone that I know...So its worse because it makes me feel that much lonelier. if thats even a word lol.

Dawn - posted on 03/26/2009

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my baby [harrison] is 6 months now ,my husband also works long hours,and some days i feel a little low,but im getting better,my little boy as been poorly so that has not helped but making friends on ere have helped try not being so hard on youself,if you ever need to talk give us a shout ,takecare xxxxxxxxx

Natalie - posted on 03/26/2009

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i know exacly how u feel Cara! you probabbly work so hard with your daughter but dont get much help from your husband coz he wrks all day too, im the same! When my partner comes in from work i want to give my son to him for a break but he wants 5 minutes too an its frustrating! why dont you see if there is someone too look after ur little girl who u trust and then enjoy a night out with your partner! If u fancie a girls night out if u have a sister ask her or sister in law. im on maternity leave still and im starting to miss my friends from work so maybe a part time job or jus meeting mums in the park, try jus chattin to someone you have never met before about the weather or something they can talk back to you about, I always do it lol! x

Karinne - posted on 03/25/2009

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Hi Cara.  Good babies are still babies...as much as you love them we all need a break every now and then.  Maybe you feel a bit down because your life is lackig a little bit of fun and time for you to just be you.  Have you thought about organising a babysitter or putting your baby into care for 1 day a week or fortnight to give yourself some 'you' time? Do you work?  I found going back to work for 1 or 2 days a week to be great for me!

Renee - posted on 03/25/2009

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I have def. felt like that before! And I'm sure a lot of moms have. I actually went back to work part time when my son was 4 months old. I had wanted to stay home, but financially it made more sense. I think it's helped b/c it's the only time I really "get out". I am home by myself a couple days during the week and luckily have reconnected with a few friends that have kids or have just had babies. I know this helps me a lot! Now I am finally getting back to feeling normal. Have you tried setting up one night a week to get together with some friends? That way they can plan on doing something at least one night with you? Where do you live I'd love to have another mom to hangout with =) I'm in California.

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