Single moms working full time and going back to school full time

Yvette - posted on 07/07/2010 ( 13 moms have responded )

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Being a single mom, we want what's best for our family. We have to make decisions sometimes alone without anyone to help make them for us? Do you want to go back to school or maybe perhaps you never finished school and would like to go to school to make life better for you and your children? I would like to begin by saying I am a single mom of two lovely children. My daughter Teyiah is 11y/o and Xavier 9 y/o. They are my pride and joy. They keep me on my toes all of the time! I made the decision to go back to school to better my future for myself and family. I had to crawl before I could walk. I have a daughter who is hearing impaired and a son who is ADD and I am proud to say they are. It is what it is!!! Being a single mom can be a challenge. No one ask to be a single mom, in life we have unforseen circumstances that does not allow for both parents to be together. Do we blame one another or do you move on with your lives and strive for the very best! Well, I did! I moved on and in the process I returned back to school. I started from a community college receiving a two degree to a four year university. I went on to getting my Masters in Mental Health Counseling. Now, I'm back in school persuing my P.h.D. in Pscyhology! I've gotten this far through hard work and dedication. There was nothing easy about getting an education going to school full time and working full time as well!!! I had my struggles and break downs! At times, I felt like giving up, but again---my children motivates me every single day!!! My daughter constantly, asks me...."Mom did you do your homework?" My son...."Mom you look stressed out, why don't you take a short break?" You see... they keep me on my toes!! You---As a single mom, you've got to believe in your dreams, goals, and aspiration. You can do it!!! I would like to hear from some of your experiences going back to school and balance work and family at the same time!!!!!

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Crystal - posted on 05/13/2015

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I work and attend school both full time while caring for 3 kids. It's hard when you don't have many people to babysit. I call everyone I know and trust when a sitter cancels. It's very hard no one has no idea that this is stressful doing everything on your own. Despite it all my GPA is 3.75. I work hard and do the best I can. My classmates are mostly young and can't believe my GPA is so high and when I tell them I have 3 kids I raise on my own they're shocked and that's when I say if I can do this so can you so get your GPA high and focus. Ps. Always ask god for hep. It maybe overwhelming, you cry, your kids don't understand what's going on but I know it's all to better their lives.

Jaime - posted on 06/03/2014

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I know this is an old post but recently my soon to be ex husband just dropped a bomb shell that he is filing for divorce. I packed up my 3 kids 8,5, and 3 and moved 4 hours away back to my home town. (we were military) I work full time and attend college full time online. I have my kids usually all the time their dad comes maybe once a month. I was just looking at my homework ready to cry because there is so much to do i.e. homework, work, chores, kids that it gets so overwhelming that I just want to crawl in bed and sleep lol. I needed to read others stories to help motivate me and know I am not the only one going through this. Thank you for sharing!

Ms. - posted on 07/30/2014

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Peace Karinna Ro,

Well to answer your question directly, yes. It IS really possible for you to rebuild your life after so much trauma and show your bright eyed daughter that there is another kind of life; a better life. No matter what, no matter what, focus on WHAT YOU WANT. When times get rough, keep your focus. When you feel like you can't take no more and ready to give up, keep your focus. Remember why you are doing it. Take it from someone who stayed in a shelter in the Bronx for a year and has came up since then.

With regard to some practical help for you, I would suggest, though you may have already done this, you look online for scholarships. Are you going for your Bachelor's degree? Do you have housing? Where are you from? From what I hear there are alot of scholarships for women, minority women, mothers, immigrants (or other natives of other lands), etc. Do a search and see whats out there and what you can qualify for. Call schools you are interested in and find out info about deadlines, costs, etc.

The main thing.....don't give up, sis. It may take some time. It won't happen over night. But it WILL happen.

Blessings,
Imani

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Kali - posted on 09/12/2016

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Wow ladies! I am so glad I am not the only one. What I have learned through being a single mother to my beautiful 3 year old daughter, going to school full time as an honors student, and working over 40 hours a week in the insurance field is that at the end of the day we are the only ones we can count on to make our lives and our children's lives better. My biggest struggle for a long time was time management, I was struggling with how to possibly accomplish every single thing that I needed to do and still have time for my baby. What I found is that a good planner is an absolute necessity, I have a full size 8" by 111/2" planner that I literally pack full of every single date and time that I need to remember. I use my planner for assignments, time with my daughter, time for myself, and time for work. I even went as far as to download weekly printables from a website that I found online, and begin actually filling in a daily schedule down to the minute. It is without a doubt the ONLY thing keeping me on track. In addition, for you fabulous ladies who are struggling finding that extra time to complete assignments, housework, or alone time, I highly recommend an early morning study session, cleaning session, or relaxation session. I have managed to figure out how to have myself and my daughter in bed at 8:30pm, asleep by 9pm and I am up at 5am with a good hour and a half to two hours of time to myself before I need to get myself dressed and ready for work, and my daughter dressed and ready for daycare. I use this time to study if I need to, do some laundry, or just sit my butt down on the patio and watch the sun come up. That is the only way I don't go insane. Childcare can be extremely difficult as well with the costs being almost one entire income. I recommend calling every single childcare facility that is in your area until you find a place that offers scholarships for "low income" families. You may not truly be "low income" but for only one adult in the household, many times you can qualify for either free or discounted childcare. If that doesn't work, visit your local DES office, they also offer childcare vouchers that many single parents can qualify for. The fact of the matter is, at the end of the day you have to be the one to make your dreams come true, not only to show your children that they can do ANYTHING they want to do even if the odds are against them, but also to show YOURSELF that NO ONE can stand in the way of your dreams. Plus there is nothing better than knowing that you are probably the only person in your circle handling all of the things that you do, and you are doing an excellent job at it. A mother in school full time and still making money full time is a HUGE ACCOMPLISHMENT even if you are feeling defeated. It is NOT easy and very few people can do it, but YOU can! Keep knocking on doors until they open and DO NOT give up. There is the perfect path carved out for each of us, you just have to find it. Those that give up stay in a revolving circle of sadness and lost hope. Good luck ladies, I know you will all kick some serious ass!

Y - posted on 09/05/2016

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I have joined this Circle in search of inspiration/motivation. I refused to believe that I was the only single mom struggling through full time work and full time school and being an active member of my children's school. This is only week 2 of living this life. I am trying to fit full time job in 3 days and I already feel so stressed, overworked, and exhausted.
I am so glad I found this community of strong women I can draw some strength from.
I need tips/advice on how to remain organized and balance my work/school/personal life. I want to sacrifice as little time with my kids as possible.
And how do you moms organize your time to still have enough time to do the unbelievable amount of homework that professors assign?
Advice is greatly appreciated!

Cleris - posted on 08/14/2016

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Wow, that is amazing and gives me so much hope. I am new single mom, and my son is 6 months old and I am working full-time and attending school- all online. I am nervous about how I am going to handle everything, but knowing that it has been done and can be done really helps a lot!

Karinna - posted on 07/19/2014

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First congratulations for accomplishing your goal. I am a single mother of a girl almost 8 year old. I arrived to this country (legally one year ago), I read abut your success stories, but no one says how a single mother can work and who take care of her kids? that is my main problem, we are alone in Brooklyn, New York, no friends nor family, after schools programs go to 5.30 pm, so my question is, is it really possible for a single mom trying to rebuild her life after so much domestic violence to show her daughter there is "other kind of life" or are just cases like if tomorrow I will win the lottery? I went to a family center, and the answers were discouraging, the counselor told me "really, its hard, I have to pay myself to come to work to someone to take care of my 2 boys".... when I went to a self support office, to find out about scholarships and what and where could I start to improve my education, they told me to go to a community college because they are cheaper than private. But everyone, advise me ..."oh you are not on food stamps, you should, you qualify" I know I "qualify" and I say thank you but not, I don't want any gift, I just want an advise how can I open a path for my daughter and myself, so if anyone has any, any kind of advise I would appreciate it a lot. Thank you and once again congratulations to all this moms that accomplished what they were looking for. God Bless all.

Rosalie - posted on 12/27/2013

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I am a single mother of a soon to be 8 year old son. The fall semester was my first time back in a class room setting in 15 years. I work 40+ hours a week and my son son's father just dropped a bomb us that he isn't going to be taking my son any more. I have 14 credit hours scheduled this coming semester. I know that with our strength we can take on all but i'm wondering if this is something I can do.......some helpful words or insight would be helpful.....feeling over whelmed....

Barbara - posted on 09/20/2012

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Hello everyone! Im a single mother of 3 boys. I attend school full time and i just got a full time job. I have come along way just trying to make it. It is very hard because it feels like there isnt enough time to do the things i want to do like going out to eat, meeting with friends, or just seeing a movie on a friday night. My kids father is in prison for 25yrs so i really dont get much help. My mom helps but she can be a little harsh at times. I understand though. I make it through all of this because I believe in God and I have faith that there is something better for me. Stay positive and keep believing in something better nothing is impossible.

User - posted on 02/15/2012

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I'm a single Mother and work FT 8-5 and have classes 4 days a week from about 6-9:50pm. Each day is challenging because some days, my son cooperates and gets up and other days, he doesn't want to get out of bed and its a struggle to get him dressed and eat breakfast and get myself ready for work and school. I drop my son off at daycare every morning before 8am and pick him up after 5pm when I'm off. I only have just enough time to take him to my good friend who is kind to help for a few hours while I'm in class. I have a ways to go but I want to get my AA and become a Nurse.

Kea - posted on 09/28/2011

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Im going back to work & school fulltime, mother of 3. Im nervous and scared but i know it will be better for us in the end. Anyone out there with some positive comments

Yvette - posted on 08/08/2010

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I need some participation here if you would please. I need your feedback!

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