[deleted account] ( 19 moms have responded )
I just had my daughter about a month ago and I love her more than anything in the world she is such a blessing to me.. but lately I can't handle all the loneliness and stress that comes with being a single mom.. I live at home with my parents currently who were more than generous enough to let me stay with them while I get myself together before I can actually get on my feet but it's been nothing but difficult emotionally I can't seem to stay as strong as I have to be I find myself crying most of the time.. my daughter is also slightly colic and not being able to console her also wears on me as well. Her father is my ex-fiance and refuses to pay any child support so I have to go to court to petition it, which is also very stressful. His family demands they can come over every day, any day at anytime and don't have to respect my families wishes with when we say they can come over his dad stood in my kitchen screaming at my mom which was extremely uncalled for. I'm in a rut definitely. And I do allow the father to see his daughter on his days off, I will bring the baby to a public place we can meet at for a few hours (which also sucks) last place I want to be is hanging out with my ex, but he is her father and I'm not looking to deny him of seeing his baby at all what so ever. I am not working right now and I was going to school full time before I got pregnant.. I have my associates degree already which is good and I'm currently going for my bachelors in Psychology, although I had to take a leave of absence because of the baby's due date I would not have been able to go back this semester :/ so I'm returning in the fall if possible because I have a lot of student loans out :/ I have been applying for jobs left and right to try and make some sort of income so I can support the baby some how until any child support comes in for her because it isn't my parents responsibility to help pay for her things and they had just recently told me they are selling the house and moving to Florida within the next year or so :/ so I really need to get going with a job and finding a place.. I'm extremely fearful of being on my own.. but I just keep telling myself to keep applying and try for any and everything any type of job will do for now.. I just really hope things start to look up for me and my daughter!