All Communities > Single Moms > Any other single moms work night shift?

Any other single moms work night shift?

Christina - posted on 12/07/2011 ( 2 moms have responded )

31

0

I am a single mother of a 3 year old daughter. I work nights as a correctional officer. I have been working with a great department for almost 2 years and was moved approx 6 months ago. Over the last few months I have noticed that my daughters behavior has drastically changed. Her behavior has gotten absolutely horrible!!! I keep trying to fing things to blame it on, but every single time I get to the bottom of the problem I find the same thing...She isnt coping with not being at home with me at night and staying 2 nights here, then 2 nights there kinda thing. I try to explain things to her in a way that she can understand and keep things simple. She used to cry herself to sleep at first, now she doesnt because she says "Mommy has to go to work again" so she understands to an extent.
She stays with my ex's mother on the nights that I work ( I have no one else to keep her & they enjoy time with her) Working nights takes a lot of time away from my daughter that she has been used to having her entire life until recently.
I really do not want to have to leave my job because of this and cant really afford to take the pay cut that I would have to take to go elsewhere...I have asked to be transfered back to days with no results.
*Anyone have any sugguestions on how to fix some of these bahavior problems? or suggestions on what I should do?

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms

2 Comments

View replies by

Luvmia - posted on 12/11/2011

297

2

With all changes, it is adjustment period for anyone. Eventually she will see the benefits of being able to have some time with her grandparents as well as you.

Just keep up the good work.

Hayley - posted on 12/09/2011

16

49

It will take time for her to adjust. Kids deal with the most amazing things in life and yes, she is crying out for your attention but, as you've explained to her there's just some things parents need to do. Explain that she's asleep anyway and you can't see each other when you're asleep but she can dream about you and you'll be there when she wakes up. Point out that spending time with her grandma is a very special thing. Ask grandma to help you with this and maybe have a special thing she does only at Grandma's house. Let her pick out a set of sheets or something special to use when staying at certain places. Get her involved as much as possible, all the while gently letting her know that this separation/your job needs to happen. It is probably a combination of separation anxiety and unease at spending time at someone else's house. The more familiar bedtime rituals/things going on around her are, the easier it will be for settle in to your new way of family life. Kids are remarkable creatures and are quite resilient, we just need to give them the time and support to do it. Good luck!

Want to find out the opinions of this community?

Add Poll