Boyfriend wants to kiss and hug on my son. Should I let him?

Jatoria - posted on 04/23/2012 ( 9 moms have responded )

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My boyfriend is really getting close to my son and he wants to kiss and hug on him, but his dad is around and I'm in between because idk if i would be alright with his girlfriend if he gets one to kiss all on my son. Help Need advice

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Louise - posted on 04/23/2012

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If your relationship with the boyfriend is to move forward then he has to bond with your son. It is only natural to kiss and hug a child that you are taking on the role of step dad. If your ex has a serious girlfriend then she too will bond with your son, whether you like it or not.

Tabitha - posted on 04/23/2012

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If you trust him and your son is comfortable with a hug and kiss, it shouldn't be a problem. I know you wouldn't be happy about him hugging dad's girlfriend but that's just part of life with separated/divorced parents. He needs to be able to bond if you plan on keeping this guy around. Who knows, maybe he'll be the new "Mr."

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Linzy - posted on 04/25/2012

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Is your son comfortable with the affection? My son was almost 3 when my guy & I started dating. He loved when Ryan put him on his shoulders or carried him, but never liked hugs or kisses from really anyone but me. I sometimes get slightly jealous when he's affectionate with his dad's girlfriend, but I know it's not the same as a mother's love. It's just nice knowing she cares for him.

Domi - posted on 04/24/2012

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well you kind of need to explain how long you have been with the person before i can fully answer this. if the relationship is new i would keep things much slower between the new guy and your son. and if its really just about your exs emotions thats not really important. if you are to move on in your life you cant worry as much about that and you as well as the father will both have to accept that means new people in your childs life.

Brittany - posted on 04/23/2012

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He may mind.. thats only natural - the same way you would mind a girlfriend of his bonding with your son.

But, we have to remeber - this is about the baby.. if these people are in his life, you want them to be positive relationships :)

Jatoria - posted on 04/23/2012

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Thank You everybody and i dont consider him a stranger i was just a lil hesitant about it because i was looking at it from the dads point of view and thinking would he mind that or not

Brittany - posted on 04/23/2012

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^^ If you consider him a stranger... or don't trust him, you shouldn't be allowing him around your child.

Brittany - posted on 04/23/2012

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HI there :) If it makes you uncomfortable, don't allow it.(But you may want to rethink your relationship if so... you and baby should BOTH love anyman you allow into your lives) Although if you think this man is going to be staying around it maybe beneficial for you to allow him and your son to form a close relationship. Nothing wrong with more then the 2 natural parents loving your child. My son adores his step dad.. and even though I was unsure of it at first, now I love knowing my son has soooo many people who adore him and so many people he can put his trust into.

Good luck :)

Sherry - posted on 04/23/2012

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I wouldn't be ok with it. He is not family. He is pretty much a stranger in my eyes. It would take a lot for me to trust a man to even be near my daughter.

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