Can post-partum depression sneak up on your after a few months to a year of child birth?

Elizabeth - posted on 08/24/2012 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I have been dangerously depressed since my daughter turned one. The only thing that makes me truly happy is being around her. I have to look at pictures of her all day to make it through my work day.. and when I'm not staring at her pictures I am on this site searching for validation from other moms when I should be working.



I feel worthless when I am not taking care of my daughter.

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Elizabeth - posted on 10/23/2012

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Reveonna- I know what you mean about hating everyone but your daughter. I am so mean to everyone in my life, but an angel to my daughter. It's like she is all that matters to me. I even snap at my boyfriend if he wants to take care of her.

Elizabeth - posted on 10/23/2012

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Thanks for the replies you guys. I do need to find a counselor. I wanted to follow up with everyone because right now I have no one to really talk to. My boyfriend says he is not my therapist, which is true, he isn't so why should I rely on him? I know I need therapy though. Another thing that has been getting me down is that I had the most traumatic c-section my doctor had ever done. I have flash backs frequently. Today I felt like I was cut open and bleeding everywhere. I was also told early on in my pregnancy that I may have had twins and miscarried one, so when I have flashbacks to of the delivery I keep imagining two babies, but one is dead. I'm a psychology student in college so I keep trying to self diagnose and self-treat, horrible idea. Need professional help!



Also want to clarify it doesn't keep me from being a good mom. I haven't gotten to the point where I can't play and laugh and make sure to take care of her. It just keeps from being a sane person when my daughter is not around. Believe me ladies, if I could quit my job and be a stay at home I would! Hopefully within the next year I will be able to. My boyfriend and I are trying to work out our financial capabilities to get married and buy a house, because a small apartment and boyfriend/girlfriend situation does not work well with raising a child especially when I have all this depression going on.

Ginger - posted on 08/28/2012

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It is very important to take care of yourself. If you loose it who will be her Mommy. So don't feel guilty about admitting it. You said dangerously depressed soo I would go ahead and talk with a doctor about it. It is normal to feel anxiety going back to work and feel tired or exausted and want to be there to make everything perfect for your baby, but when you find yourself feeling worhtless and uncontrolably sad or crying that is a sign of actual depression. So Yes postpartum depression can be delayed onset. It is about that time that your child is able to do some things and you have gone back to work and that is a change that allows you to think of how you feel. So now that you noticed you are feeling that bad, please do your kid a favor and address this issue. I know my sadness didn't come on for a few months after my Son was born. After the exaughtion set in and i had time to sit around and relive all the things that happened. I did admit it and seek a doctors help with saved my boy's Mommy (Me) and there for has given him a Mommy that can laugh more and play more and get more work done to make more money. It happens to the best of us.

Reveonna - posted on 08/28/2012

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Hi elizabeth I'm new to this site but please don't feel your the only one. My daughter is 2 & eight months & I am six mints on from being diagnosed with post natal depression. I couldn't Coe at all. The usual felt like the worst mother & wife in the world while trying to just get through brushing my teeth in the morning. I'm on an anti depressant for the last 5 monts but initially I refused to take them. Taking them was the best decision I've made. I've had other circumstances that have added to my depression over the last year but am so well able to cope & deal with things now. They are not a permenant fix but they will set you on the right path. I've found exercise has helped me no end but only since I started taking the tablets. I felt the same as you about my daughter she was the only one I wanted I even hated my husband. It's all changed. I hope this helps you to see you are not alone. Good luck with everything. Being a mother & wife is hard but it should be rewarding too. Watch this space!!!!

Amie - posted on 08/25/2012

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Hi Elizabeth. In answer to your question about post-partum depression it is yes and can be a factor for any mum up to their child's second birthday! If you are concerned in any way about this there are post-partum tests you can do that will identify it for you (available online...edinbourgh depression scale is one used here in Australia). But it would be great if you could discuss this with your doctor or a child health nurse. In reply to the rest of your query I think Mama needs to have a soul searching heart to heart with herself! Maybe you could cut back on your hours or even days. Maybe your in a position to quit! But you sound like you need to be with your girl! On the other hand if none of these options are possible remember that quality over rides quantity. Every moment you have with your sweetness counts in her life. I know of one mum who has quality time immediately with her child when she gets home and ensures the weekend is full of one-on-one time. Obviously this will take some time management and a change in some routines. Most of all don't let your negative voice 'beat' you up about this. You are doing the best that you can with what you've got right now. Who knows what will come in the future and it's too time consuming and emotionally draining thinking about it, so don't. You know the answer! You have to just be brave and go with it! I wish you and your daughter all the best.

Aracely - posted on 08/24/2012

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I think it might be a case of mommy needing to be a mommy! When my daughter was a baby i worked and i did nothing but cry on my lunch break. The thought of missing even the tiniest of her milestones made me very sad. I was Blessed enough to be able to quit my work and stay at home with her. I know not everyone can afford to do that, but it was the solution to my sadness. Talk about it with your husband, maybe you can find a way to cut enough unnecesary expenses so you can cut back on hours at work and be with your daughter. Best of luck!

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