Custody, bf drama,and CPS?

Jen - posted on 07/03/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I've been suffering from Postpartum depression since I had my baby. Started out on the day that my bf left me in hospital while I was giving birth to his child. Said some really nasty things to me and call me a cunt and how I was rude because I didn't want his mom in the delivery room. His mom is really mean to me and always calling me for money so I'm really intimated by her since the day we started dating. She even wrote me letters in the past to leave his son cause he has no money and we should Dutch everytime we go eat. He is the only son and his dad passed away a few years ago and his mom doesn't want him to be with any girl. She never looked at me once when I had the baby and want to take my baby away from me. He  never came to pick me up on the day I was getting discharge with the baby from the hospital. So, my parents came and picked up a carseat last min to take me home. I moved back home with my parents, because I couldn't take this emotional abuse. He has never been there for our son and only see him once a week. Recently, I've said some really bad thing about hurting my baby just to get back at him. I did it for attention and I never mean it and just wanted him to talk to me. He called the cops on me and took me to a psychiatric hospital for 4days. Now he is threatening me to take custody of my child  and use that against me each time. CPS is now on my case and said if I seek help and see a therapist, she would not bring this to court and I will get my baby back in my custody. He now has temporary custody of my child, but my baby is still with me everyday. He pnly take him home once a week. II think the whole reason why he did that, because theres a child support case opened and he doesnt want to give any money to me. How do I prove that I am not an unfit mother. I love my baby and I can't get over the fact hes verbally and psychically abusive to me. Hes a mommas boy and he will never stand up for me and had kicked me out of the apt a few time to walk home while I was pregnant. Everytime his mom yelled at him, he would take it out on me. He tells me how much his mom hates me and etc everytime we argue. She told me that i need to work after 2 weeks after having baby, cause he has no money for us. Im citrently not working yet, because my body isnt fully recover yet and seeing a doc every week. Hes never been very supportive and try to understand me. He had a dv before for hitting me while I was pregnant and there was a witness that called the cops, but I lied to help him get off his case. I even went to a bails bond to get him out. tNow, he just threaten me to take my child away everytime I want to break up with him. I think hes driving me crazy at this point. Im not a bad person, but he just tell me i have problems everyday. Can he use this against me saying I threaten my kid and i dont work so he can take full custody if we go to court? I cant let him take my son away from me and my bf doesn't know how to cook or do anything for himself. His Mom still treat him like a baby and I can't let my son live in an environment like that. Sorry for venting but I need some advice.

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3 Comments

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Erin - posted on 07/06/2012

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You need a lawyer. Have the lawyer draw up papers to reverse custody/quash the temporary order because if you are so dangerous have your ex explain why the baby is in your care. If you hadn't gotten the baby taken away I would say you should have left the state. Never and I mean NEVER speak to any cps agent without a warrant or lawyer. They can't make you let them in and can't make you talk to them. You should have never used the baby to get back at your ex and now you're paying a steep price. You need a lawyer. I suggets NOT having any further contact with cps unless it is ordered by a JUDGE.

Jen - posted on 07/03/2012

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Yeah, I know I'm foolish. The social worker told me that I will get my son back in my custod if I continue to go seek help. She even said she will not bring this to court and feel that we can work on this n drop the case in a month. I felt like I can't never trust this guy again after all he always tell me to go die n can do this to . He told me he knew I said it out of anger but still call the cops. I'm so hurt n he keep threatening me every time I try to leave him. I'm just scare of what's going to happpen since he does have the ball in his court right now....I can't afford a lawyer right now so I just try to agree with everything he tell me..

Louise - posted on 07/03/2012

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By what you have written here you are very young and foolish! You must never say you are going to hurt a child because the welfare officers cannot ignore this, it is a protection issue and one that is taken very seriously. Now that they are on your case you have to do everything they say to get custody of your child. EVERYTHING. Stay at your parents house, go to all the councilling and do everything by the book. Then when they are happy that you have and close the case, either file for sole custody and get this creep out of your life or ask your parents to take sole custody until you can find a job and get back on your feet. You need to speak to a legal advisor to sort this mess out as it is complicated. Dont lash out in anger again using your baby as leverage it gets you in to deep trouble!