Dad is refusing to baby proof

Bonnie - posted on 01/04/2009 ( 9 moms have responded )

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Hi, I'm the mom of a wonderful 6 1/2 month old baby boy. His dad and I are on good terms but I feel that the issue of baby proofing may soon change that. He lives with his friend, another guy, and they are both slobs. On top of that they have large bookcases in their living room, all sorts of electronics with exposed wires, and stairs with no gates. I asked him to start babyproofing his home since my son is over ther two days a week and he's getting close to crawling. He refused, saying it's impossible while he lives with this roomate. His solution is to, instead, fence off a small corner in his living room and keep our son there.



Now, we have never gone to court to work out any sort of custody agreement. I have no idea what my rights are here. Does anyone have any advice or information?

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9 Comments

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Shauna - posted on 12/30/2009

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safety first and you have every right to demand he makes his house safe for your son if he doesnt your son doesnt go you have every right ,dont even reason with him its a must your sons safety comes first.

Samantha - posted on 12/29/2009

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It might help to bring him with you to your next Pediatric appointment, share your concerns with your doctor, then he can hear it directly from the doctor. Also, sometimes the doctor's offices have handouts, but it would be better coming directly from them.

Cindi - posted on 12/28/2009

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Part of this posting just scared me but I know that my daughters father will never take her, it's hard enough to get him to take her for the night or two.



Keep in mind that the baby's safety comes first. If he cant talk to his roommate about babyproofing the house, then if he wants to see his child, he better find other living arrangements. If he won't babyproof the house but leave baby in corner, in a cage, then he obviously isn't playing with the baby anyways. My daughter is on the verge of crawling and I try to get her to follow me everywhere, and I try to chase her, even though she's sliding on her belly, she's loving every minute of it. If I was to put her in the corner, OMG, the screaming that would come from her...

Christella - posted on 12/28/2009

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his place needs to be baby proof, otherwise your child can and will get hurt.

Marisa - posted on 12/28/2009

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I would not let your child go visit until he agrees to baby proof. If your child is there two days a week, alot of the baby proofing can be undone aqfter your child leaves- the baby gate, etc. As far as the wires and cords they can be tied off and put out of view. Also if your child is there and he is a responisble father, he should be watching his child at all times, espoicially at that age they can be quick! If his roommate doesn't understand then he is a jerk and you and your child's father should seek other arrangements. It can be worked our with some compromise on his part.

Megan - posted on 12/27/2009

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If you haven't gone to court then there are really no set rules. I know alot of people who will tell you not to go b/c of this little sitch and I agree. You don't have to let him go over b/c there is no court order. BUT also keep in mind that b/c there is no court order the dad can come and TAKE him b/c right now he has equal rights to the baby as you do. Yes, mommies do usually have the upperhand, but he still has the right to come and TAKE your son to have equal vivitation with him. In my opinion you should get custody agreement in black and white. This way you can never be confused, its all there laid out.

Bel - posted on 01/04/2009

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Thats so unsafe and not very responsible on his part. I would simply say the baby can't go over there until the place has been babbyproof and stick to your guns.

Brandi - posted on 01/04/2009

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Court... well you want to try to stay out of it as much as you can... He might be just saying this or that... im sure once he takes him and he is starting to get into things he will quickly learn that he has to do something about it.... do you think he is really going to let his own son get hurt or into some thing that might harm him..
Hes just trying to irritate you.... But yes telling him if its not baby proofed his son is not going to be able to go over to his place he will have to make other arrangements.... and this will irritate him to so he will do something about it.... but remember it may not be exactly how you think it should be... so good luck.. I know how it is.. i went threw this with my sons dad but it was the issue of smoking in the house.... grrrrrrrrrrr rounds and rounds ......but won....

Deanna - posted on 01/04/2009

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Sorry, I'd tell him" I don't care what your living situation is right now you MUST baby proof the home!" There are no exceptions here... Certainly his roomate must understand the situation.... And besides to fence off a corner of the living room is something you do for your dog.... NOT your child.



I'd make it known to your son's father that until he baby proofs the home that your son can NOT be over there... There are just too many dangers and it's not worth the risk of your child getting hurt.

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