How do I stop repeating myself to my five year old?
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Beth - posted on 04/01/2012
My daughters suffer from selective hearing and they're slightly older. Normally after a spat of not listening to me. I ask them to put on their listening ears and that I'm only going to say what I need to say once then tell them. If I have to say it a second or third time, I'm not going to be impressed.
Another tactic that I've learnt - give the instruction that needs giving (e.g. make your bed etc) then ask them what I've just said. Also other things like turning off whatever's distracting them (computer game, TV etc) found that helps as that way the can't claim they didn't hear what I said. Certainly think that a lot of the time it is selective hearing.
Also worth monitoring to check that there isn't any underlying medical condition that hasn't been picked up which could give a good reason for your daughter not to hear what you said the first time.
Mellanie - posted on 03/31/2012
My 5 year old daughter doesn't listen to me and I find that I repeat myself 3 and or 4 times and I find that I am also starting to repeat things with adults as well. Like talking about a farmers market I was telling an adult there was one in town and then they said there was one just down over there and I said well the one I was talking about is over by the college and they got mad at me and just ignored me. I feel like I am always doing something wrong. Please help
Allie1972 - posted on 02/21/2009
It is important when dealing with children who have trouble listening is that you get their attention. That means be in the same room, and call their name. Ask them to look at you if you have to. Look directly into their eyes and tell them what you need to. Then ask them to repeat back to you what you just said to make sure that they a) understand and b) they will realize that you expect them to listen and respond to what you are saying. My daughter has selective hearing sometimes - turn the TV or whatever off if you have to.
Eventually, with practice, they should immediately respond and you won't have to ask them to repeat what you said.
Jo - posted on 02/19/2009
sounds like selective hearing to me...I have 4 children ranging from 5 to 20, they all hear first time when its something they want to hear. I don't think theres an easy solution...in my xperience you'll get used to your own voice and repeating yourself with adults won't hurt them! best of luck
Nicki - posted on 02/18/2009
I had the same problem with my son a few years ago. It may sound a bit harsh but I refused to repeat myself and if he didn't listen to me he was punished as if he had been naughty. The naughty step was wearing out fast. After about 6 months he started listening, he's now 8 and already understands the importance of listening to people, it also helps him talk to me a lot more as he knows I am listening to him.
Kiersten - posted on 02/18/2009
Oh my gosh, i would love advice on that as well !!!... My daughter is brilliant in school, untill the behavior problem sets in, and its not behavior like hitting , its listening and her hyperactiveness. She has always had that problem... She doesnt watch alot of TV... but when i talk to her, i have to repeat it to her 3 or more times.