How to respond to an invite to my son's paternal grandmother's birthday party

Jane - posted on 02/28/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

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So my son is 13 in May and hasn't seen his father or any of his father's family since he was 16 months old. During this time I have left the door open to his paternal grandmother for her to keep in touch, I've sent the odd photo and we've exchanged christmas cards, etc. But that is it - nothing more.



Today I've received an invitation to her 70th birthday party in May - the day before my son's 13th birthday. Obviously we need to decide whether or not to go, especially as it will mean that my son will meet his father for the first time since he's been old enough to really understand who he is, etc. Part of me wants to go to show off my amazing, gorgeous son and, if I'm honest, gloat about how well he has done with no influence from his father, but part of me wants to let sleeping dogs lie and not open the door that much to the paternal side of my son's family.



At the moment I am leaning toward leaving the actual decision completely up to my son as he is old enough to decide whether he wants to meet that side of the family. Trouble is I have told him about the invite and he seems to also be in a quandry about it!



What do you other single mums think? Go with head held high and show them what they have missed, or just give it a miss?

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User - posted on 02/28/2012

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hi, id say let ur son decide. he is old enough now to make that decision. yes by all means go with ur head held high and show off to the max, but only if ur son decides that he wants 2 go. u dont want to make him go and then he has a really bad time as he may then place the blame on u. the best thing is to let him decide. thats just my opinion anyway. good luck.xx

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Taylor - posted on 02/29/2012

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i agree.. if anything.. this is perfect timing. your son is now old enough to decide on his own. i'd leave it completely up to him

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