Maite - posted on 01/20/2011 ( 26 moms have responded )
Good morning, ladies! I've never really been on this but I'm at the point where I need neutral opinions. My son is 3 years old. His father and I separated almost 2 years ago. We've still been somewhat involved until about September. He's now living with a woman whom has made it a point in disrespecting me and making threatening phone calls to me. He himself has actually gone as far as threatening to kill me because of fights we've gotten into because of her. I've never allowed him to take my son with him since I felt my son was too young but I'm aware that my son is already getting bigger and the time is here where I should be letting him go with daddy. I've never kept him away from daddy but my arrangement was that he had to come visit our son in my mother's house. I leave to avoid conflict. He's now wanting to take my son with him and just the thought makes my heart want to burst out of my chest. He loves our son and would never hurt him but I can't help but feel uncomfortable at the thought. He has an older son who's about 8 years old. The child has made comments to me that he does not want to stay with his dad because of the woman. He's also made the same comments to his grandmother; I have an excellent relationship with my ex mother in law. She agrees with me not letting dad take our son and confides in me by sharing things she witnesses in their household. I also recently learned that they've gotten into pretty violent fights themselves. I also know from experience that my ex leaves his son with whomever so that he can go to the gym or do whatever it is he needs to do. His son lives with him and is taken care of by that woman since his biological mom studies out of state.
I just recently changed my phone number to avoid her threatening phone calls and it's come to the point that my son's father does not even have my number. He can only reach me through my mom's number. I also did a police report on him when he threatened to kill me. Several days ago my son asked to speak with his dad and when I called, the woman did not pass him the phone. How can I feel comfortable having my son in a household where the ambiance is everything but civil? The courts have yet to get involved and he does not pay me NOT ONE CENT!! I don't know what to do. I want to resolve this issue with the courts once and for all but the fear that he will have my son with him overnight drives me insane. I do not trust him and much less do I trust her. What should I do!?? Not to mention, the woman is a stripper and my ex has a past criminal record.....