I want another baby but dont have a partner should i use a donor?

Kristin - posted on 06/18/2012

Jessica,
To me it sounds like you have already made up your mind. Being a single parent is hard and there are jealousy issues you will have to contend with. Also, you have to be mentally prepared to have a newborn, a 6 yr old and a full time job. It is not up to anyone to judge or criticize as a lot of people have 2 or 3 kids with deadbeat fathers. Me personally, I would not have a baby througnh a sperm donor and i had my first son young 16 and then had my 2 youngest with my current spouse (ages 6 and 1). But if you really want another child and you feel you can handle it emotionally and finacially than the choiuce is up to you Good luck

Jessica - posted on 06/17/2012

thanks for your advice Louise i do have a counter though i know that technically i have alot of baby making years left in me but i personally dont want to have children after the age of 30 so really there are only 6 years left for me i also dont have regular cycles so it may take a while for me to conceive and im worried that if i leave it for too long the harder it will be. and my daughter has my father and brother as male rolde models in her life so i know she isnt missing out on that essential bond but yes i am worried about how it affects her and its one of the reasons i have yet to look for a donor/co-parent. and im sure your daughter does love being spoiled by her older siblings but i know my daughter would definitely not be happy if i waited another 10 years to give her a sibling :) thanks again for you advice/opinions it definitely given me alot to think about :)

Louise - posted on 06/17/2012

I understand your body shouting you want another baby because the usual is about 2 years after having your first, what I dont understand is why you would want to bring another baby into the world without the father figure in their life. You are only 24! I had my second child at 24 after my first at 21 and then I had a huge age gap of 15 years before my daughter arrived. All three with my husband. I know you are single but dont you want more for the next child. You have raised one already single handed dont you want more for her too?

I really think you should hold off until you find a man you want to make a family with. It is so important to the child to have both parents in their life, or to know their roots. I could understand you doing this if your biological clock was ticking, but you have 20 years to worry about that. Lots of mums these days are having their first kids at 40!

I think you should put more effort into finding a partner. There are many dating sites out there these days, or better still get your mates to set you up with some blind dates, live a little! Who knows Mr Right may be right round the corner. If not then you have the security of knowing that sperm donation is always there.

As for having a big age gap, my daughter loves having adult brothers its like having 3 dads. She is spoilt rotten!