Im a single 18 yr old mama who is in need of love bad. Do u have any tips on findin a good man?
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Elizabeth - posted on 03/01/2010
I am a 22 year old single mother to a 6 month old. I have yet to be interested in any man that has came across me. Im not looking and really dont care to cause i know my son needs me but yes it had crossed my mind as when he gets older hes going to want to go out and do "boy" things and want a man to take him. You are the only person your daughter needs but IF a man does come into your life be upfront with him and show him like the someone said above that you have a daughter that is you everything and he cant love you without him love her as well and that you dont need him to provide for you cause that will turn him away. good luck!
Kathy - posted on 02/28/2010
You need to find yourself Ariel, to find a good man at 18 ????? I am not sure that is going to happen, I am 47 now and it took me 37 years, but I can advise if you want to hear it. You are 18 why are you looking, you have a daughter that you need to be a mom to, she needs you to be the best you can be, mentally and physically, have you finished high school?
A good man is looking for a women that is strong, independent, financially capable of looking after herself and not needy and right now you seem to me to be needy and most guys like my son would run from you.
You need to show you daughter how strong you are you need to remember that she wants to grow up and be like you, are you happy where you are in your life ?
I wasn't truly happy till I was about 35 because by then I decided that I was going to be on my own with no man... the first time in my life since I was 16 yrs old, I started to like being on my own and when I decided I had everything education, a job, great friends, a home, and extra time on my hands I decided that I would start being available and open to the opposite sex, but I enjoyed my own company first and I started to really love myself and the person that I had become.
Anything worth having takes lots of work and right now you need to work hard to make a great life for yourself and your daughter that is what needs to be for now
Consuela - posted on 02/27/2010
First of all, do you have Jesus in your life? I don't mean talking to Him every once in awhile. I mean a true holy relationship.? Get a real relationship with Jesus first and He will bring the right man to you. You don't want just anybody. Jesus knows the desires of your heart and He will give you the desires of your heart if you delight yourself in Him. Plus you need to be careful who you bring around your child. I was engaged to a man I just knew was the right one. My oldest daughter's heart had been broken before by an ex boyfrind. It was bad enough that her father wasn't in her life. And my fiance called off everything three weeks before the wedding. It took my daughter so long to break down that wall and accept him and then he leaves us. So now I'm waiting on God. You do it that way and I promise you, you won't regret it.
Renee - posted on 02/27/2010
I agree...you don't need a man and you don't need to be looking for one. From my own experience, when I was the most desperate to find a man, that's when I got the biggest losers. Mostly due to the fact that your standards are way down when you're lonely and want to be with somebody so bad. Just focus on you and your daughter. The right one will come along when you least expect it, and you'll KNOW when you find him! LoL I know this sounds like cheesy mom-type of advice, but it's sooo true. And you won't have to deal with the drama and headaches of finding the wrong ones first. :D
Cathy - posted on 02/27/2010
Having a relationship is a lot like drinking Ariel, you shouldn't do it if you "need to" that's unhealthy. The best way to find love is to not be looking for it, focus on developing the person you are becoming, and the huge adjustments motherhood is making in your life. If you are open, and working towards your goals, you will be way more appealing to a quality man. Speaking of which, you might want to change that profile pic, you look like you're starring in a porn flick. You need to remember that there are lots of predators out there, and it is not only yourself you put at risk now.
Shanna - posted on 02/26/2010
I'm 22, My daughter is 19 months and I have no interest in looking for a man. All my attention goes to my daughter and college. I have no time for men, nor do i want to introduce a man to my daughter unless I knew it was a long-term thing. You should focus on your daughter. Your daughter doesn't need a man, she needs you.
Nicole - posted on 02/25/2010
I no this is probably not somthing you want to hear. But you don't need a man right now! Consintrate on your baby. Be a good mom, do everything for your child. Things will eventually work out for the best. I know it sucks being alone, and even harder being alone raising a child! I also am single raising my son alone, its hard, really hard. Were gonna have our good days and bad days. Were still really young. Im 23, we have our whole lives ahead of us! Be in it for your kid now! Feel good about yourself and everything will fall into place!
Audry - posted on 02/25/2010
all i can honestly say is don't look. and the signs that he's a good man is he accepts the fact that you have a daughter and is willing to help. now i don't mean help as in take on the role of daddy, but play with her and show some interrest. and have no worries you're only 18 and have some time to just sit back and relax. just know that you do not need a man, you are very capable of taking care of your daughter by yourself. if you show that in your personality then you will attract the right kind of man. a man doesn't want a woman who is just looking for someone to take care of her and her kid(s), he wants someone who can handle things on their own. trust me it took me a long time to figure that one out. hope it helps :)