Just looking for support. Tell me I

Brittney - posted on 01/15/2010 ( 6 moms have responded )

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I've been tring to work things out with my 4 month old daughter's father. Not because I love him, but because I thought that was what was best for our daughter. I was wrong. We got in a stupid fight about nothing and he told me to leave so I grabed my stuff and loaded up the car. I brought my baby to him and said take her. I wanted to let him say bye. He refused and told me to get out of his face. When I didn't move his face got all evil and he started yelling and then he head butted me. I lost my balance and fell on the floor with my baby in my arms. I sat there stuned for a fue minits and his mom came and took my daughter from my arms. I couldn't go home and let my mom see me like that so I stayed with a friend. I let his mom take her for the night. I am done with him. He is a danger to me and my daughter, but my heart is broken because the dream I had for my family is over.

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That is heartbreaking. I have two sons from two different guys and they are both absent from my sons lives. I also tried for the kids and delt with abusive men. IT IS NOT WORTH IT. I know the "family dream" is shot and that does suck but think of it this way... would you rather raise them as a single mother or raise them in a family scene full of screaming and abuse? I picked being a single mother. When your daughter gets old enough she will understand why you and daddy didnt work out. Everything will be okay. Keep your head up and concentrate on you and your little girl and whats best for the both of you. :) And remember... he will NEVER change!!!!!!

Michelle - posted on 01/16/2010

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You say you don't love him and if so that's good. Because neither you nor your daughter need this man in your life the way he's acting.
I'm curious why you felt your mom couldn't see you that way. You may need her help so you should tell her. And if you know she would be on his side for some reason, you need to get some outside assistance. Protecting your child comes first. Good luck.

Amber - posted on 01/16/2010

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Get out while you and your daughter can still be safe...don't put yourself and your daughter in those situations. It's probably going to hurt and bother you for awhile, but don't get caught up in the what-ifs. Keep telling yourself its for the best and work at moving on.

Brenda - posted on 01/16/2010

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Keeping your daughter safe is the only thing you need to worry about!!! He obviously doesnt care for you or her! you are better off without a"man" like that in either of your lives!! Dont be afraid to go home--parents can really be more understanding than we give them credit for sometimes!! I have a friend who is still with her husband even though he beats her up --because she" stays for the kids"--thats not even right you should leave that kind relationship Because of your kids!!!! best of luck to the both of you!

Samantha - posted on 01/15/2010

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I feel ya, but you did what was best for your Kid. and you took her out of that situation that could of been worse. I have seen my friends try and work things out with their partener cuz of the kids and it just makes things worse, on you and the kid. As for your dream theirs always another one and theirs a guy out thier that will treat you and your kid like no one has before. My dream was over too, but you got to hold your head up high and move on for your kid. I hope this helps alittle...

Patricia - posted on 01/15/2010

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The most important thing is to keep your daughter safe no matter what. I'm not sure of your situation but if he lives with his mom I would not let her stay with his mother. It seems that he has an anger problem and you don't want to put your daugher in the middle of it, Don't be afraid to go home, let your family help you, its great to have the support from family and friends, I had a very abusive boyfriend who put my daughter and I in danger when I was pregnant, He is a very angry person. I had the same dream as you. I thought that my daughter should get to know her father a vise versa and maybe get along so we could be somewhat of a family( not as a couple) for our daugter but I was wrong. You still are a family you and your daughter and you also have the rest of your family that will love that baby just as much as you do. It takes time but things will get better. Good luck to you both and take care :-)

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