Pregnant without a partner

Dezarae - posted on 08/25/2015 ( 23 moms have responded )

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I'm a young pregnant mom looking for the support of strong women to help me get through being single and pregnant..

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Sarah - posted on 08/26/2015

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Do you mind me asking why your family didn't want you to have the baby? I truly am sorry that you don't have their support. As a woman you need to know you are strong and even though you might feel alone you will get through it! Hold on to that excitement that he'll be here soon everyday because it is beyond amazing what that little man will do to you. It is the most incredible thing ever and your life will have new meaning the second you put him in your arms!

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Ashley - posted on 08/30/2015

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Hey girl, I hope everything is going well. I just read your post and had to respond because I was in your shoes. If you need someone to talk to I am here for you.

Dezarae - posted on 08/29/2015

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I was thinking of doing yoga, especially now as I'm really starting to feel the
Pregnancy weight on my body.. Hopefully it benefits me physically and emotionally

Sarah - posted on 08/29/2015

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Yoga? Pilates? The exercise ball helped me a lot. I did that everyday up to when I went into labor. I also worked with a doula. Have you thought about that, even if it's one or two sessions so you can focus on relaxation as much as possible for the rest of your pregnancy.

Dezarae - posted on 08/29/2015

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I was a gym fanatic before pregnancy.. But now being so far along in pregnancy it's becoming hard for me to even work as much as I do, I couldn't even imagine working out .
I am so eager for him to come so my life with him can start and we can be happy.

Sarah - posted on 08/29/2015

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That is a sure way to see who will stand by you no matter what. The loneliness is hard but try to focus on other things to pass time (any hobbies?). Once your boy arrives you will be so consumed with caring for him that the loneliness will begin to fade.

Dezarae - posted on 08/29/2015

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It's become hard loosing a lot of my friends because I am having a baby ... However I'm glad I realized who was real or not. Than having minimal family support and no father to my child has been crappy. I go to work and most days just come home and be alone. It sucks, but I keep trying to remind myself that in 9 weeks my boy will be here!

Sarah - posted on 08/29/2015

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It will get better as time goes on (might be cliche but really is true). Take things as they come, day by day. Yes! that's a great attitude...focus needs to be on staying healthy for you and baby. If you need to vent or ask any questions about pregnancy please let me know, I'll be more than happy to help!

Dezarae - posted on 08/29/2015

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Trying my best to just continue living my life without him. I spent too much of my time focusing on having him around. When in reality if he wanted to be around than he would have. Feeling sad... Alone and hurt. But trying to focus on my baby is worth the bigger picture

Sarah - posted on 08/27/2015

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For me in the beginning wanting to make it work was the idea of a father figure. I grew up in a household where family was everything. I had amazing parents and I always thought that when the day came that I had children I want the same for them. That was the hardest realization for me knowing that my son's dad was not the dad I had. But you know what, one day he will have that positive male figure in his life. It does hurt, some days worse than others but try not to supress those feelings. Scream if you have to scream, but let it out. Having a child grow up in an environment of love is the best thing.

Dezarae - posted on 08/27/2015

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There are so many times I find myself wanting to make it work with him ... And I don't even know why any more. I have too been that person making excuses for their actions and words. It hurts and has cut deep

Sarah - posted on 08/27/2015

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I've been through at least 3 relationships before my last one with my son's father that each had some form of abuse. In the beginning I was that woman who kept making excuses for their behavior. I almost always said it's ok, it'll change, I'll stick it out. Well it'll change turned into days, months then years. In the beginning I wasn't in a place where I believed I was worth it but believe me you are. I saw patterns right away with my son's father and didn't think twice about getting out. I wrote down everything he said / did almost acting as a journal. Sometimes putting your thoughts down on paper is in itself a release. I talked to counselors for abuse who directed me to resources available, there are a lot available to women. If you can't talk to your family without it getting heated then maybe try writing down the reasons for your decision (not justifing it because you shouldn't have to do that since you are your own person capable of making decisions) but to try to get them on board. Be completely upfront and if you are doing it for the right reasons they will come around.

Dezarae - posted on 08/27/2015

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How did you have such strength to leave the abusive relationship? How have you been managing and coping? I am trying to get through all of this

Sarah - posted on 08/26/2015

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I can't comprehend a family saying that, it breaks my heart. You're taking responsibility for your actions and your decision to keep the baby was the first step. You took it so even at 20 you are a strong woman...give yourself a lot of credit. Sometimes the best things come out of unforseen circumstances.

Dezarae - posted on 08/26/2015

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I am 20 years old and this was not a planned pregnancy. However my family demanded me to get an abortion or to leave the family. And I refused the abortion so things were heated for months.
Thank you for the support

Sarah - posted on 08/26/2015

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I am sorry for your situation, hard enough to be expecting without support. Put him on the BC, and go for support. If you aren't going to get emotional and physical support then the money will help!

Dezarae - posted on 08/26/2015

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I do have family however they did not want me to keep this child from the start. So things are awkward and tense whenever any conversation of the child comes up. I am due in 9 weeks and it's becoming so real and exciting for me knowing he is on his way. However not having the support leaves me hurt and feeling alone

Sarah - posted on 08/26/2015

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I find it amusing how they don't take credit for the situation...It takes two to tango man! I've been in many relationships that attempted to work things out but after I heard that countless times I've been single. Since you said things were calm and he still said he wanted nothing to do with you or your son then it really might be a blessing in disguise. I heard very similar things from my ex and then some to the point of verbal abuse. Being pregnant in itself is an emotional roller coaster. You do not want to deal with the added stress of things back and forth. Whether he says he doesn't want to one minute then another minute he changes his mind altogether. What's your family situation? Do you not have any or is it a matter of support? You have someone to talk to here!

Dezarae - posted on 08/26/2015

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Basically, I told him I was pregnant with HIS child and he left me... And it wasn't calm either. Long story short the police were involved with huge measures.
Things calmed and we attempted to work things out. That didn't happen and now he has made it clear he wants nothing to do with me or our son.
I'm not sure how to cope well with being pregnant and alone (without partner, family or much friend support).

Sarah - posted on 08/26/2015

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I was 1 month pregnant when I left my partner and my son is 13 months old now. What's going on? How are you feeling?

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