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Rooming with another single mom

Emily - posted on 07/17/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I am seriously considering an opportunity to room with another single mom. Right now, my 5-month-old son and I live in an apartment that is okay, but not ideal. The laundry is across the parking lot (ok for now, but not in a winter blizzard) and expensive, there is no yard, the shower water changes temperature at random, etc. A friend of a friend, a single mom of a 4yo girl, needs a roommate in her big house with a fenced back yard and garage. It's closer to work and we would have our own two bedrooms and bathroom.
She seems like a pretty awesome person, and the mutual friend said she is good at setting boundaries, which I think is one of the most important skills for making a roommate situation work. We talked about being able to give each other a little time off, particularly when the kids are asleep and one of us just wants to get out of the house. Does anyone have other suggestions for (a) things to look for before committing to move in or (b) ways to make the roommate relationship successful?

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3 Comments

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Clarissa - posted on 07/24/2010

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Before committing talk it over with her how long you plan on living with her. You may want to agree on signing a lease. Month to month or 1 year. This will state how much you and her agreed on paying her and the length of time. Just in case something doesn't work out. The court shows have more than enough roommate cases. You may also want to consider getting a part time job to help you out. I have a good business opportunity that is home based.

Vanessa - posted on 07/18/2010

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I'd go for it! .... I think!!
i've never moved in with another single mom (I did think about it as I was the one with the big house and thought about getting someone in to help with the rent) however I decided against it because I had enough troubles stepping over my own sons toys and ultimately still wanted to ensure that if I wanted my own space, I could have it. Then again, my OCD'd-ness came into play... you know - I like things a certain way and to see someone doing something thats not my way makes me stress! I decided that being able to run nudie from the shower to the bedroom was important and I struggled on by myself :-)
If this potential person is good with boundaries, then why not give it a trial. Agree to maybe a three mth trial before extending for a fixed term if you like. By the sounds of it, your current flat is in dire need of help anyway - and if things don't work at the end of three mths - you will have saved a bit of $ and can maybe explore your options again.
As far as suggestions go - just ensure you get rent receipts stating the paid from and to dates so if she ever tries to claim you didn't pay for eg. November - you have the proof. Or if its direct bank deposit, type on the statement NOVEMBER RENT.
Probably not all that helpful was I!
*huggles*

Karmi - posted on 07/18/2010

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I personally think it is a great idea, but I would go out to dinner and talk to this mom without the kids to see how you feel. If you feel uncomfortable around her then maybe weigh your pros and cons. Also make sure your son is comfortable around her daughter and have a couple playdates before hand. I would think it is a great idea as long as you are comfortable with the other mom and her daughter.

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