Sorry for the Vent - don't be cruel! LOL

Sherry - posted on 09/17/2010

A child does not necessarily need two parents. One fantastic parent is better than two abusive ones.

Ayanna - posted on 09/17/2010

While I respect the law, I don't agree. The law is black or white. There's no gray! What about fathers who abuse mentally, physically, or sexually. You have to trust your feelings. Maybe its not the father, but the company he keeps. So many kids are raped or abused by someone they know. I think its foolish for a woman to deny the father rights if its just about her feeling for him. But the law is NOT always right. The law see what it wants to see. Yes, we want the world to be perfect, and to protect us, but WE have to protect ourselves and our kids! Its like the tv ratings a few years back. If you can't be parent enough to check to see what your kids is watching, then you don't need tv. If my kids were in danger (or I believed it so), I wouldn't wait for the courts to figure it out! Let's keep it REAL! We don't live in a perfect world!

Maria - posted on 09/17/2010

i only partially agree with this. my kids' father *says* he loves them and wants to see them and be in there lives, but he is an acoholic, his house is absolutely filthy, and he is violent. He doesn't have much patience, so when my son was only 2 weeks old, and 6 lbs, he got a remote control thrown at him and screamed at to shut the f**k up. My son is now 12 months old and he is suffering everytime he sees his father because the courts believe its best for him to have 2 parents. So I cant say i fully agree with this, because of views like this, my son is in danger everytime his father decides he wants to see him, and all of the LOADS and LOADS of evidence i have is not enough. Thankfully even though he has scheduled time every other weekend he only shows up about once every 3 months. This is heartbreaking to me, that some children have to go through this and there is nothing i can do about it. but i will never give up.

Anna - posted on 09/14/2010

There are circumstances that need to be taken into account for everything. I have tried and tried to get my kids' dead beat dad involved in their lives and he still is stuck in his own little world. The outcome of all my trying was that myself as well as my son endured both physical and mental abuse from him. so if he isn't around and doesn't want to be around, don't force it. If he does want to be a part of his kid's life, let him by all means. Cuz it would really suck if your kid missed out on a great dad because of the drama between you two. When it all comes down to it, if he has done something that makes him unfit to be alone with the kids (and it is actually legit) go to the courts and they will put it in writing!!!

Jenita - posted on 09/14/2010

I completely agree. As much as that man may have hurt you, he is still the father of your child. As long as he is willing, provided he is sane and stable, mother's should allow them to be in the child's life. My daughter's Father left when I was still pregnant, and although he called frequently after the child was born he didnt do much else. Yes, it was extremely frustrating, but when he finally got ready to see her (more than a year after she was born) I made sure he couldnt use the excuse that I kept him away from his daugter. So if he continues to be a positive continous influence in her life I will do my part, and if she comes to view him in any negative light that will not be due to any influence from me.

Courtney - posted on 09/13/2010

I almost completely agree. There are so many of us who wish that the child's father WANTED to spend time with their child. Take the legal actions and do things the right way. You laid down with him, so at some point you thought he was good enough. Granted, he may not be the best parent, or the parent you wish he was, but at least he's spending SOME time with the child and seems to want to be involved in some way shape or form. I had to harrass my daughter's father to see her most of the time. Bowed to his beck and call for when and how he wanted to see her... And when I stopped contacting him about her visiting (and subsequently took him for court controlled support) he decided he didn't want to see her anymore.

Jaclyn - posted on 09/13/2010

I agree with you 100%. A friend of mine just split with her husband and the mom and dad got into a fight, so he decided he wasn't going to come get the kids. The outcome was the small child thinking that her daddy was mad at her. Parents need to get over it. When you have a baby with someone, you do what's best for that child...PERIOD. It's not about you anymore.

Vanessa - posted on 09/13/2010

I know - I'm 35 weeks pregnant and have recently lost my brain/mouth filter!

Candice - posted on 09/13/2010

a "abrupt" as that was, i tend to agree. Fathers have rights, whether we wish they did or not, whether they deserve them or not. Having another girlfriend, cheating on you, being a lazy slob, or even not paying child support are not reason enough to keep a kis from their father. And it's not just about the fathers' rights...it's about the children's right to know their fathers. Now, on the other hand, abuse (physical or otherwise), or inappropriate acts (sexual, drug, whatever) may be reasons to go to court and attempt to protect your child.