What to do about my situation

Christina - posted on 08/22/2012

I hope so Kristin lol

Thanks

Kristin - posted on 08/21/2012

I dont like my ex and I always feel bad that he chose to be a deadbeat dad. It hiurts because I love and treasure my kids so much and he cant be bothered, so I just try not to think about it and enjoy making them happy because seeing them happy brings me so much joy and I have a gret man in my life who treats my kids like they are his own. I used to be angry wiht my ex as well but I realize now that I feel sorry for him because he is mising out on therse wonderful children and he is too busy running away to pay child support to even have a life. He quits his jobs all the time and truly it is a shame, but one can not force someone else to be a parent and spend time with their children if they choose not to. Glad I cheered you uo a little bit, it does get easier in time.

Christina - posted on 08/21/2012

Kristin,

Thank you so much for your kind works and support. Im kind of having a hard day but after reading your kind words and support i feel much better. I just wish i could get past my feelings towards him. I just dont know how to handle this situation at all.

Kristin - posted on 08/21/2012

Christina,
Thats right it is their choice and they are the ones who will lose out in the long run. You just keep staying strong and positive one day you will meet a nice man who will be a daddy to your daughter. Some men just need to grow up and realize that a child is a treasure and a joy and not burden or a hindrance and it is their responsibility to be a parent, What floors me is how women are expoected to change their whole lives to be a mother and some men still only think of themselves, like really once a child is born they come first always and forever.

Erin - posted on 08/21/2012

Your welcome Christina.

Christina - posted on 08/20/2012

Hi Kristin,

thank you so much for replying. Your rite he needs to prove to us that he wants to be in her life and not when ever he wants. I just need to remember this is his choice not ours. Hes a big boy and can make his own choices and if he doesnt want to be in her life thats just fine with me. Its so sad that these dead beat dads seem to think they can do whatever they want. Its time for them to step up and be the father these gorgeous lil babies deserve!!!!!!

Kristin - posted on 08/20/2012

Get a parentening order with ordred times and lengths and see if he follows it. I personally feel that you should not have to drive for his to see his daughter he should be tje one to drive. He also needs to prove that he wants to be in her life on a regular basis not a fly by night type of thing. If you are concerned about the care he gives her request supervised visits and he should be paying child support as well. My ex lives 3 hours away and i used to drive the kids down and pick them up until i got tired of it now he never sees the kids because he wont drive to come get them and they are better off. We are single mothers and should not be kissing our deadbeat dad ex's asses they need to grow up and be responsible. Stand firm your doing the right thing

Christina - posted on 08/19/2012

Thank you so much Erin Rogers. I just never thought this is where my daughter and I's life would be when it comes to her dad. I dont trust or believe him at all so i think im going to do what you said. You have been a big help thank you so much. I hope in your situation and in mine its gets better sooner then later.

Erin - posted on 08/19/2012

I am in the same boat... I have twin boys who will be a year old in eleven days. Their Dad lives THREE minutes away and never comes to see them. He will make plans to come see them and then cancel the night before or the day of. I cant trust him to keep his word, I cant count on him to buy diapers or food for my boys. He says he loves them yet he never comes to see them.... If I were you, I would not let him see his daughter until he has proven to you that he is serious about it. Actions speek louder than words, and what he is telling you is that he has better things to do than visit his daughter or take her for a awhile. He needs to be a man of his word. If your motherly instincts are telling you that he cant take care of her as well as you do, than thats probably so. Trust your instincts and do whats best for your daughter.