Why are you a single mum?

Raychael - posted on 06/27/2010 ( 557 moms have responded )

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Just curious for those out there who are single mums why you are? I was seeing my ex for amost 1 1/2 yrs when he started getting stupid. He began drinking (alot), doing drugs, and other things I'd prefer not tomention but on the 4th of July 2008 was when it got to the breaking point. He had drank so much he fell and twisted is ankle, and as i tried to help him he pushed me away then tried to grab my arm and break it. Now I have a lot of brothers and no one layes a hand on me so i finished breaking his ankle for him. of course not 3 months later i had to get an ultrasound to figure out why i've lost 30 lbs in 3 months and what did the ultra sound produce? A 5 1/2 month old litte fetus...... welcome to the world lil Z. His father has never seen him, helped out, and tried to blame another guy for Z. Ahh family life.

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Michelle - posted on 07/08/2010

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Im a single mum bcos my ex decided the kids n I were a good for taking his angry out on. After we were married for 8 months n I was 6 months preganant he cheated on me then tried to make it look like I did the cheating even though I was the size of a house, he was also was having a really good time with his ex wife n a few of the women he worked with. The abuse slowly got worse so I kicked his arse out n havent had any peace from him since. We r now divorced n I hav all 5 children living with me, 3 of them are my stepchildren who he had with his first wife. No I dont regret leaving his arse but I just wish he would back off n let the children n I live our lives without his abuse n harrassment. He is always telling people I am the worsest mother ever but I still hav all the children because he cant handle them more then a few days at a time. He is always ringing the police on me n accuses me of being a prostitute all the time, he has made threats about hurting the children n himself just to get back at me which worries me so much because he get all 4 little ones by himself, I am worried that they will not come homee one day but I dont seem to be able to get anyone to listen to me about hime so I hav to let him hav the children or I will be the one who losses them forever, he does not help me with raising the children he pays me nothing, n if he does give me money for the children he always wants me to pay it bac so I hav stopped excepting it because I cant afford to pay it back to him. But like I said I do not regret ever kicking him out I think it was the best thing I have ever done for the children and myself.

Mariana - posted on 07/08/2010

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Henrique's dad abandoned us 3 days after knowing i was pregnant.

We were living 2gether for 16 months already and we were engaged. The baby was planned, he asked me to stop the pill so we could have a baby before getting married and so i did..

When i told him i was finally pregnant, 3 months after stopping the pill, he left me.. Alone, no family here.. I suffered from september till april when my parents came back to Portugal to help me raise my son. His dad's family wanted me to make an abortion..but now they ask to see the baby.. His dad has another girl already, younger than me, single mom of a 4 year old boy and she is not taking care of him (the father has him)..

That means i have his son and i am no good and she is.. I feel so bad.. I still love that bastard.. Well hope everybody has a happy life! Kisse to all single moms. Be proud of ur achievement cause i am!

Summer - posted on 07/08/2010

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i am a single mom because RJ dad was a liar, he had another girl pregnant his daughter is 4 month older than RJ. I left when i was four months pregnant and to date he comes when he wants, look right now RJ is real sick and he is fight a cold and have fever coming and going vomiting last night and he called this evening to asked how he going, always claiming he loves his son but he don't show it. And RJ is sick and he hasnt come once to see him. So i am single and proud

Lori - posted on 07/08/2010

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I am a single mom because my childs father was abusive and unfaithful. I wish it were not so, and I thought perhaps he would change, but he didn't and I couldn't continue to live my life in fear that I would be hurt physically or that he would continue to cheat and either leave us or bring home a disease. It wasn't worth the risk to keep the family whole. Eventually the abuse would have become directed at our daughter too. She already had a fear of him mixed in with her love, and I didn't want that fear to replace the love.

Rachelle - posted on 07/08/2010

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Why am I a single mum? Its a long story but very similar to alot that I have read. As hard as it is financially at times, I kind of like it this way. My now 4yo daughter & I are very close & happy. My ex like so many others left me for someone else whilst I was pregnant, after 15 years together! He got into the booze & the pills & partying & that was that. I look at him now & he's miserable & I don't miss him one bit?

[deleted account]

won't go into details, but after 12 year marriage decided I didn't want my kids to learn that it was ok for them to be treated, or to treat anyone else the way I was. And knew I couldn't face my family if I'd allowed it to continue... Been healing 5 years. Haven't found the right guy for me yet, but can't give up hope.

Marianne - posted on 07/08/2010

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I am a single mom because the love of my life died in a car accident when our daughter was 11 months old. I have been reading many of the other entries and I think every high school girl should read them and think twice before having sex! What heartbreak is out there! I am devastated with my loss, but I don't know what I would do in these brave moms' shoes... God be with you, gals!

Carrie - posted on 07/08/2010

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I have 2 children with my ex husband. he decided when out oldest was about 10 months old to quit his job and work on his own business. which would have been swell if we'd had any money. So we moved in with a family friend while he "worked". When I got pregnant with my youngest, i told him he had until she was born to get it together. He didn't. I had a friend pick me up from the hospital with my 1 day old daughter, went to the house, picked up the 3 yr old, packed our belongings and moved out. I had no car, no money, no job.
I got full custody, he has supervised visitation (he acted up a bit during the divorce/custody Trial) and I went back to school.
I couldn't be happier.

Ashley - posted on 07/08/2010

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I was 15 when I got pregnant. Yes that is very young. When I was 6 months pregnant my "baby daddy" was sent to boot camp. That should have been my first red flag but I stayed with him. After my daughter was born he came around when it was convenient.We lasted probably 3 months after she was born. When my daughter was 2 I filed for child support and never got it even after the court order. When my daughter was 5 he signed his rights away. It was the best thing he ever did fro her. He was into drugs, alcohol, and beating his new wife so she is better off without him.

Cassey - posted on 07/08/2010

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i had problems with my ex, he did drugs stole, cheated and turned violent. i kept on at it thinking i owed it to my son, but then when he didn't turn up to support our baby through a heart surgery (was to busy getting stoned) that was the last straw for me. I am so happy now on my own, i feel like i am in total control, so much more confident. I am currently pregnant with my second, but instead of worrying that i won't be able to cope i am getting truly excited. just me and my two angels x

Melissa - posted on 07/08/2010

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Well, long story short....the sperm donor and I were together for a couple years..planned to get married, make a life together etc.Where actually living together..due to our age difference we decided that we didn't want to wait till we got married to start a family tho so we didn't.Two VERY stressful years of TTC, we were at our wits end with it and got in a huge fight one night where I proceeded to kick him and his crap out.Couple weeks later when all has cooled down and we're talking/hanging out again we find out I'm almost THREE months pregnant.haha...didn't know, no signs all due to my thyroid issues.We didn't get back together at that time, and up until he met someone he went to all my prenantal appointments with me.THEN he met some married lil skank (ppl introcing them didn't know she was married) and it all went down hill.I did a good 4-5 months of my pregnancy alone.

He broke up with her...we messed around....things where getting better.He was there for her birth and we ended up getting back together when she was about a month or so old.She was born June 2006, tho by end of October I was tired of being told I did nothing even tho I was home w/ her all day and babysitting a mutual friends 3 kids (2, 6, & 7 at the time) PLUS keeping the house clean, doing laundry, cooking all the meals, shopping and anything else that needed done.He went to work, came home and parked in front of the tv until I would have to wake him up to get into bed so he wouldn't be hurtin' in the morning from sleeping on the sofa.grrrr

Since then he's been pretty mia. I'm not single, tho I still consider myself a single mom since my bf is not her father. He's also in the Army and is stationed nearly 3000 miles away in another state and we've been doing the long distance thing. He wants to take care of us, to be her father, even to adopt her and I'm all for it. I will NOT deny him that after all the love and support he's shown me in the almost 9yrs we've known each other.Plus she deserves is. Even without him, I wouldn't trade anything in the world for her...she's the rock that keeps me going each and every day and I would gladly raise her 100% by myself if I had to.

Jenn - posted on 07/08/2010

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I am a single Mom because after 10 years of being together with my daughter's father,and 6 years of trying for her,he decided to go back to his ex.......he was really mean to me & our daughter the first 2 months we were there anyway....we are both MUCH better off without the LOSER in our lives,he doesn't bother at all or help out in any way!!
I am just not looking forward to answering her questions when she gets bigger and starts asking about him!! :(

Bonnie - posted on 07/08/2010

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I was with my husband till my son was 1 1/2. I left because he refused to. I wanted him to leave because I noticed that my son was losing his love for his father because of the way his father was treating me. (he used to yell and swear at me).
We tried a second go and it wsa going pretty good. Then he called me an a**hole because I asked him a question. That was it for me. We are now in the process of seperating. I want him to leave this time so I don't have to move with my son again. He says he has a place one minute, then asks why either one of us should move the next.
Time is ticking until I have to make the choice of picking up and moving again.

Alisha - posted on 07/08/2010

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I am a single mom because her dad and I were young (16 when we started dating) and we have absolutely not much in common anymore as far as how to live and raise children. He has his priorities messed up as far as wanting to be with his friends more than me and his daughter so I broke it off 3 years ago. Our daughter is 4 1/2 and he sees her every other weekend and sometimes a day during the week. It works out but it's hard for me knowing she has 2 different households she has to be raised in with two different rule standards, so it's hard. I know the Lord Jesus will give me a great man someday with whom I can have a great relationship and family with, but for now it's just me and my little peanut. I'm still praying!

Sherri - posted on 07/08/2010

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I'm a single mom of two boys...4 and 7. I chose to be alone because it was better than being with a drunk, emotionally abusive excuse of a man. The fighting was getting to be too much...I started having panic attacks and was unable to leave my house to work or even go to the grocery store.

Now, I am once again independent and strong. My boys are all I need to keep me going and I realized that it isn't worth it to me to put myself or my kids at risk just for the sake of being with somebody. Maybe one day I will meet Mr. Right...but for now, I am working on me and focusing on what matters most to me...my kiddos...

Katherine - posted on 07/08/2010

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Im a very HAPPY single mother. My daughter is 8 months at the moment and everything I live for. My daughter's father is a no good and even if the choice occured to him tomorrow to want to be in her life. I would completely refuse. Unfortunately though she looks just like him. He's an irresponsible, immature being who could never teach my daughter the correct way to live life. Even though, some say people change..theres also a spanish say that says that " the brach that comes bent can never be straightened", I am such a firm believer. My daughter has never met him and hopefully never will. If she doesn't know him she wont never miss him. Its better to be a single parent completely then have him there until he chooses to move on when your child is big enough to notice. SINGLE MOMS KEEP YOUR HEAD UP AND REMEMBER EVERYTHING YOU DO IN LIFE, YOU PAY IN LIFE.

Randi - posted on 07/08/2010

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I am 22 years old and i have an amazing 3 year old daughter.
My daughters father and I were working together we were best friends and always talked to each other, then for about a week he was telling me about all these problems he was having at home with his son's mom..... she 'kicked' him out and he had no where to go so i told him he could move in with me for a bit.... well things ended up getting serious and we got a place together, we got his son every other week and everything seemed fine. one day i just had a feeling i needed to take a pregnancy test, so we went and bought one and turns out i was pregnant, he was so happy at first calling everyone he knew..... and then 2 months later i was going to work, i told him i would call him when our checks came in and he was like alright and i asked him what was wrong and he said nothing was wrong he was fine. a few hours later he came in to work and came up behind me and said "im not going to be there when you get home' and i said 'okay, you gonna be home late?' and he said 'you dont get it..... im not going to be there when you get home' i started to cry and he said that he was just going to his friends house for a few nights to think about everything and i was like alright thats fine, call me and let me know how your doing. a few hours later his friend called me asking me where he was and i said he is supposed to be at your house. turns out he left me for his sons mom and his sons mom started prank calling me. he then started telling me he wanted me to have an abortion and he didnt even know if this child was even his, i ended up quitting where we were working becuase i couldnt deal with the harrassment..... they continued to call me and harrass me. i then gave birth july 2nd 2007 he didnt call or come and in oct. his sons mom finally called and they wanted to see her, so i brought her over, we did this for a few weeks and then i let him take her for a few hours while i was down the street at a friends when i called to tell him it was time for him to bring her back he threatened to not bring her back and told me he was going to keep her and that i couldnt do anything about it...... i had my friend drive me over there i broke in and took my little girl back.
since then he doesnt want anything to do with our little girl...... says she is ugly and not even his...... he left his sons mom and his son for her cousin......
me and his son's mom are actually pretty good friends now, so my daughter and her brother get to see each other now, but i dont want anything to do with that scum bag again........ he is the one missing out on an amazing little girl.... and he doesnt even realize it. his loss.

Caitlin - posted on 07/08/2010

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Well to keep a long story short my ex is a narcissistic sociopath. When we were together he was very very controlling and abusive. He completely changed my life (and I don't mean in a nice way). Finally when I got up the nerve to leave him I found out a week later I was pregnant. So me, being the hopeful person I am. I tried to get back with him for my daughter and things were great for about a month, but then things started all over again. I had a really difficult pregnancy because of the stress he put me through. He would constantly harass me and threaten me 50 times a day. I ended up having to be on bedrest. I tried to get a restraining order against him for me and my daughter, but the judge pretty much bought his BS and called me a liar. My daughter's now going on her 5th month and the number of times he's seen her I can barely count on my both my hands. Hasn't helped me at all. So now I work full time, go to school full time and am a full time mom. Although he's trying to take me court to get full custody of her just because he knows that's the only way he can hurt me anymore. Its been really really hard, but if I didn't have my daughter I don't know where I would be.

Angelica - posted on 07/08/2010

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hope you have all filed for child support! you can be a single mom and get support.... your child DESERVES it!

Nancy - posted on 07/08/2010

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I am a single mom of six wonderful kids all boys and one girl. My oldest is 16 i was married to his dad for 5yrs before i called it quits b/c he couldnt hold a job and i was tired of living with his parents and we just could not get a long. we were young.
then i got married to my second husband and was married for 8 1/2 yrs to him and we had three boys 14, 12, 12. things just didnt work out for us i tried to hold it all together for as long as i could but finally had enough. he got custody of my three boys b/c he was in the military and at the time i had no job and living with my parents. now my 14yr old lives with me. it takes two to make things work and it takes to make things break. we just were not right for each other. then i met my twins boy/girl 5 father and like so he gave me everything i had always wanted the love and affection i craved but when i got prego he stuck around for about 4mths and decided he wanted nothing to do with me or the baby. he wanted me to get an abortion and i told him no. i moved back in with my family and when i went to the doctor i found out i was not prego with one but two. i know that he knows he has twins but he doesnt know them and has never seen them. which is fine with me after we split up i found out things i wished i knew before hand. hes been in and out of jail, he uses fake names, and has back then 4 other kids who knows how many he has now. i look back and i am really glad that i chose to give life instead of take it. all my kids are great and i love them all. and everything that has happened to me made me a stronger person. My bf now has known my last set of twins since they were four mnths old we started out as friends and went from there when the twins were 6mths old i moved in with him and we have been together for 5yrs now. he has two wonderful kids. we plan on getting married soon and he has been a wonderful person i believe he is my soulmate.
in life you will go through many bad apples before you find the best apple ever but you need to have all the past experiences with the bad apples in order to appreciate and know that the best apple really is the best apple for you.
i do not regret anything from my past and know now that if i had chosen a different path none of my kids would be here and i would not have met my soulmate. everything happens for a reason its all in the lessons you learn and take with you. sometimes you have to do it many times before you get the lesson but we all learn differently.
you have to love yourself and know yourself and believe in yourself before you can love, trust and believe in someone else. and your children, my children have taught me how wonderful my life really is no matter how bad it gets sometimes. my kids, my family, and my true friends are my life.
dont live your life based on a grudge let it go and enjoy your life move on

Rosie - posted on 07/08/2010

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I am single mom becuase at 19 you are just not ready to get married, especially to an emotional and physically abusive yerk. My daughter is now 16 and doing fine. My 6 years dad is now my ex husband due to his drugs and party life. He now has a 1 year old that we get to see every now and then.

Nikki - posted on 07/08/2010

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I was married to my ex husband for 5 years. We found we were pregnant while we were seperated and decided to give it one last chance; we loved each other a lot and we didn't see why it would work as long as we both understood it would take work.

We married young and as we "grew up" we grew apart. We aren't bitter and we split custody of our little lady. She spends a week with daddy and then a week with momma having dinner with the other parent twice a week too.

I am a single mom because my marriage didn't work for both of us. I don't regret it and I love my little munchkin more then anything!

Megan - posted on 07/08/2010

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I am single becuase i hooked up with my ex after being broken up for a a little over a year. he got a girl pregnant when we were together so we broke up but we still liked each other. his girlfriend was 7months pg when i found i was pg. he would not leave her i did not expect him to. we have cut all ties in the last few months. he does not see my daughter or want anythin to do with her. and i am okay with it becuase i do not want his drama or stress

[deleted account]

If you can't lift me up, you are bringing me down, and you need to step off my bra strap! I can do bad all by myself! What do I need a man around to help with that? lol The only games I like to play go back in a box when I am done. My son's sperm donor can't stop lying. In and out of prison. My beautiful 13 yr Goliath (his nickname as he is 5'9" and in a men's 12.5 wide shoe) has autism. His dad was court ordered to take parenting classes (6 yrs ago), but he never did. So he is not allowed to see my son.

I chose to stay single because men are juvenile. I am not in the best shape of my life (as I have an autistic son and uncle, plus a mom with cancer that I take care of) and so men think that they can come at me with "Im so horny" Like I am so desperate that I need to put up with that BS? Please!

I do what I need to do. Stressed? Exhausted? Yes & YES! But Very Very Happy.

Joan - posted on 07/08/2010

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my ex left me when i was 32 weeks pregant with my second child and he came back the week i had her i lef him try again but not live with us to try and sort things out but 2 years later he was no different then in 2006 my life turned upside down my oldest daughter told me he had abused her it turns out he did it twice as far as we know and now he is in jail for 7 years out on licence in 2012 my daughter seems to be dealing with it really well its me that isnt i find it really hard to trust someone again and letting them into my family my oldest said she wants to see him when he is out obviuosly supervised im not happy but i feel i have to let her even if it is just the once as it may be her way of closer i dont know, as for my youngest does not know her dad. I think it is really bad that he is still entitled to parental rights i think he should have lost all them rights after what he did.

Josefina - posted on 07/08/2010

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i totally agree MY KIDS (and i say that because i carried them gave them birth and have been there everyday since day 1) they couldn't be happier. MY BOYS, DON'T NEED ANYTHING FROM HIM. WHATEVER HE DOES IN LIFE I WISH HIM WELL!!!!

Christin - posted on 07/08/2010

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Well, I was involved with a guy I (thought) I loved for about 4yrs. We never made anything official, just 'dated'. I was getting to the point where I wanted to be his girlfriend, or not at all. I'm 26 and ready to focus on me and be happy. I ultimately called it off and began 'dating' again. I had a pretty good thing going with a guy I met through an old friend, but it was a short flame. We hooked up after about a week of dates, and I started seeing more of him, and soon realized he wasnt right for me. For reasons I would rather not elaborate on now. SO I called it off with him, and blocked his number, and so on... My previous fellow and I kinda talked here and there, and I found out 6weeks later I was pregnant. I thought it was w/ the guy I had been with for 4yrs. I really wasnt sure the whole time, but when my baby was born I knew. The guy I dated for 4yrs was black, and the guy I had the fling with was white. My BEAUTIFUL son is perfect: 10 fingers, 10 toes ... Blonde hair Blue eyes...I tried to find the guy I dated momentarily and had no luck. The 4yr going no where guy is still in my life, but ONLY a friend, he has a family and in a relationship w/ someone else. I am almost happy with my position, because I dont have to share my wonderful son with someone I barely knew. BUT it is TOUGH. I have much respect for you all, and know if I can do it, you can too!

Melissa - posted on 07/08/2010

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well, my babys not born yet. but as of now im still single and i dont plan on ever getting back together with my babys father because he isnt a understanding person at all. and hes been into drugs, and has anger problems. he hasnt done anything for my baby and i, and im almost 6 months pregnant. I much enjoy being single, it is less stress for my baby and i. and i believe my baby deserves a much better life than what the father of my baby will give it. until he can smarten up and grow to realize that theres something more than drugs and anger, than i dont need him. he isnt even worth the time and hassel.

Mandi - posted on 07/08/2010

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i'm a 23 yr old single mom of a 2 yr old because the day i told the sperm donor that i was prego he told me that he's MARRIED!!...but seperated he moved his wife out of his home and a month later she tells him that she's prego too so my daughter has a sister one month and a day older than her...and now my daughter hasn't seen her dad in 2 months cause he kon;y has a heart big enough fo 1 child beer friends and drugs...his loss cause being able to wake up every morning to my daughter's perfect face is a blessing! and just glad i don't have to share her with him or his family!!

Diana - posted on 07/08/2010

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I have only two children and well i really don't know who my sons father is that's a story by its self. but my daughters father is a complete judgmental d*ck, i told him the story of what happened with my son and now he is saying our daughter is not his, he doesn't see her much and gives no effort for mental, emotional and financial support TO HIS DAUGHTER. I'm fed up with dudes and their ignorant ways. so I stay single and put my kids first ESPECIALLY before a dude any day.

Sofia - posted on 07/08/2010

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I am a single mom because I am not at all tolerant of men who drink too much & are mentaly emotionaly or physicaly abusive. Problem is in the past I was always attracted to this type of man ( rough child hood stuck with me ). I always have thought that in order to have peace in our lives I would have to stay single or settle for a nice guy but lacking the passion of the destructive kind of reationships I was used to. Wrong! Turns out that if you give the nice guy a chance he can be full of surprises,the good kind! ( Didnt know such a good guy could be so gorgeous). So Im glad I had my kids ( Gave thier donors a chance to do something great for the world).Everything happened the way it was supposed to I think, cuz my kids are awsome (all of yours are too), Ive learned a lot,&; after what felt like forever I got a great man (& his 2 beautiful little girls) in my life!!!! And those other guys r missing out but good luck to them ,hope they grow up some day!

Iesha - posted on 07/08/2010

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i became a single mom when i was 9 months pregnant. Me(im 24 yrs old now) and Eric( 29 yrs old) were together and we renting a room that cost way to much so my aunt offered to let us stay with her with less than the amount we were paying and since there was a baby on the way i told him this would be great for right now since babies are expensive. i moved out first and he was suppose to follow. This is when im 7 months prego. well then shortly after he would constantly have excuses to not move in yet and this was going on for two months in those two months i barely saw him. well one day he came over and i made dinner for him i was so happy to finally get to see him. well he ate alot and then fell aslp. lets just say i had a feeling he was cheating on me for the two months we didnt live together. so i checked his phone i never went through his phone i trusted him till then. i found text messages proving what i feared most. he was sleeping with someone else. and i knew who it was.Four days later i gave birth to my son Dominic. He has not seen him since he was 3 weeks old. He is engaged to her(20 yrs old) and has a 10 month old with her. He lives 15 minutes away and now my son is 17 months old. Eric has not been there for my son in anyway. But thats fine hes losing out and i have the best part of the relationship. ..... so theres the reason why im a single mom

Tomika - posted on 07/08/2010

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ah i know ur pain i have a 4yr old who has never seen his father a day in his life and his father has never seen him or help with anything i am a single mum of 2 and the second daddy well we just aint gone start on that im a single mum because 1 i have little boys and i refuse just to let any random guy into their life and if ur are not fit to show my boys something positive then u aint for me not asking another man to raise my kids but i have to be careful who bring around them 2nd guys these days and like it has always been really dont want to see a woman with children because u dont have time to be their mother too

Thitu - posted on 07/08/2010

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Well ladies in my part of the world if you get pregnant with a man who your not married to tradition and custom insist you marry him. fortunately that is not always the case as some ppl have changed their mind set. My father and the elders of our clan got together talked to him then me and asked me if i wanted to marry him. He has a violent nature and is very arrogant too so i said no.
Then i went to court i got him so sign a written document sating that the child is his and got my sons child support. I do not really need it as such but its the responsibility that counts.
My son is six now and he longs for a dad, he never calls him dad he calls him Pop's.
It took me a while to get over the hurt and all and i finally did. i called him up and i forgave him. Today we are good friends and though he is not the ideal dad if one at all i am fine with it because God is father to the fatherless.
My son is healthy, very intelligent and loves the Lord. I could not ask for more. Over all as a woman i have no limits, i am not held down by anger or bitterness. ladies Bitterness is a horrible thing it is its like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.
Take it from me, call them up forgive them and let God deal with it int he mean time you are free to live and once again love and be loved. This time i plan to wait till i get married and guess what... i have been located.!! Praise God.

Love you all and you are never single as i am here and Jesus is there too.
your children are not Bastards they have a father in heaven!

Maggi - posted on 07/08/2010

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I am a single mom because I did not feel the need to be rasing two children. I was working two jobs and was engaged to my son's dad but then when I found out I was pregnant he still did not feel the need to start providing for our little family to be. Plus he went through my phone on a regular basis and thought that I was cheated on him, which I never did. I made the choice to be a single mom when I realized that he would not be able to provide for me and my child the way we needed too, which meant having a stable job that brought in an income to help out with bills. He has only seen my child twice since he was born and now we are going to court for child support and such. We tried to be civil but when he fell through with what was expected of him, he was no longer able to see my child until the courts have decided. I woult never change being a single mom, I am having too much fun with my little guy as my own!!!!!

Jessica - posted on 07/08/2010

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Well Sounds to me like we're in kinda the same situation. my ex was the same way He broke up with me about 3 days before the one year and shortly after that i found out i was preg. Then he wanted to get married and all this crap but drinking was more important. He wanted to play stupid little boy(mind you hes 32 now) and I was tired of it. He also tried to say that my son isn't his because we didn't live together and he didin't know if i was cheating on him because he wasn't there all the time to watch me. So I kind of know what your talking about and your better off raising him alone you don't need someone like that in your life or your childs.

Carina - posted on 07/08/2010

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wow, there are so many broken stories here... its sad reading thru them, but inevitably one isnt a single parent unless something went worng some way or other. I was married, and he was excited about our baby initially, and then over time he started to freak out. He became very abusive, but I stayed and hoped he would work thru it, and sometimes he did, but mostly he was bad to us. I became pregnant again - not by choice, and he wanted me to get rid of this child too, but again I would not. I could never hurt my babies. I left him when my second child was 1 year old. I wanted them to have their father, but they did so much better and were happier without him. They are now 17 and nearly 16, and he barely sees them throughout their lives growing up. We have even had cases where he has tried to disown them. He is remarried now with 2 more kids, and he is a good dad to them and seems to have a good relationship with his wife, so that is a god thing, I was worried for her at first, but it seems to be ok. My children, especially my daughter (my youngest) has always missed having her father in her life. Retrospectively, we were not well matched, and when it came to the crunch we fell apart. I have learned a lot from this, and will not settle into a relationship again unless it is worth it. I enjoy being single, though at times i miss having company and hugs. Being single has its positives and negatives, though is easier than being in a bad relationship. Ultimately, it has been the best for my children too, though it would have been nice if it could have worked out. I have been a single parent for 14 years now. It has not been an easy road to walk, but there have been many beautiful moments in there :)

Josefina - posted on 07/08/2010

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I AM A SINGLE MOM, BECAUSE ITS THE BEST THING FOR MY KIDS. THERE BIOLOGICAL FATHER DENIED MY FIRST SON, AND THEN JUST KINDA DISAPPEARED FROM THERE LIVES. HE THREATENED TO TAKE ME TO COURT SO I FILED FIRST AND HE PAID C/S FOR ABOUT A YEAR AND A HALF, THEN HE QUIT COMING AROUND, AND QUIT PAYING SHORTLY THERE AFTER. I HAVE BEEN DOING IT ON MY OWN SINCE THEN AND DON'T ASK THEM FOR A DIME. THEY DON'T KNOW WHO THERE FATHER IS AND THAT IS A WONDERFUL BLESSING!!!!!!!

Josefina - posted on 07/08/2010

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YOU GO GIRL ANY ONE PERSON THAT HURTS A DEFENSELESS CHILD IS A POFS!! KUDDDOS TO U GIRL!!!!!

Marissa - posted on 07/08/2010

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my sons father is also locked up and also gets out in august. he is getting out on work release. we were together for about 6 months when i got pregnant and we were together untill i was about 5 months along. we split up because he started acting stupid. he got with a girl and i told him that by my birthday he would be in prison...(this was in may and my birthday is in june.) sure enough he called me from the prison a week after my birthday. i blew him off for a while then he started showing progress.. he is a dog trainer, has graduated the aa,anger management,and rehab classes and is now a teacher for the anger management class. he hasnt been in any trouble while hes been locked up and we are back together now. our son is now 8 /2 months old and has not seen his father yet.he listens and "talks" back when we are on the phone and so far its ok...just have to wait and see and hope he stays out of trouble when he comes home....

Fanell - posted on 07/08/2010

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I am a single mother because my 4 month old daughter's sperm donor is a loser! He was physically and emotionally abusive and so I kicked him out of MY house two weeks before I found out I was pregnant. When I did find out he told me to get an abortion because he didn't want any kids with me. I chose to keep my beautiful little girl and I have had to change my number, block my facebook account and file police reports because he continues to threaten me. It is hard sometimes trying to make ends meet but I NEVER regret my little blessing Nyah!

Jennifer - posted on 07/08/2010

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i am 23 with a great 5year old boy his father and i were engaged before i found out i was pregnant the engagement was broken off it was scary at first but i always wanted to have kids i finished hs with a's and b's his father doesn't see him much but my son is usto him not being around i wouldn't change anything my son is such a blessing his dad made his choice that he may regret one day but i thank God for every day i have with my son

Julie - posted on 07/08/2010

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My daughters biological father left me for another women and her kids when I was 7months pregnant, He has never wanted to see her she has never had a card or present off of him, then I married a man who brought up my daughter from the age of 3, he turned out to be a wife beater not just physically but mentally, emotionally and financially, so now I am going through a divorce and find myself a single mum again but am loving every minute of it started horse riding after 26 years started a new job working with young adults with learning dis and mental health and am good at it and had a tattoo of a phoenix on my back, I am doing all the things that I could not or dared not do when I was with both her biolocical dad and her step dad......

[deleted account]

I became a single mom thru adoption. At 40 years old God bless my life with a wonderful 5yr little girl.

Beverley - posted on 07/08/2010

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Scrolling through and reading some of the comments on here, at the end of the day, these "men" have lost out big time. We ladies are all beautiful people with beautiful kids. We do it 24/7 unpaid, with no complaints. Society still looks down their noses at lone parents (and I do know a single dad who was left by the mum of his daughter at birth 5 years ago because she was a druggie, and last year was left by the mum of his twin boys when they were a week old. He does a great job too), but we work damn hard to raise our kids. We have all done a great job, and I applaud every single one of my fellow single mums. xxxxxx

Beverley - posted on 07/08/2010

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I fell pregnant by my then boyfriend of 4 years Christmas 1991. When I found out I told him I was willing to go it alone, no pressure on him (he was a mature student who liked the student life afterall hmmm), but he said he would stand by me and we married in Feb of 1992. What he failed to tell me was that he actually had another girlfriend. Anyway, 25 hours after we said "I do" he said "Actually I don't anymore, can't be bothered with being a husband". Unfortunately as the marriage had been consummated I had to wait a year to divorce him. By the time my beautiful girl was born in September of 1992 he had moved onto school girls. He was 21 and brought his 14 year old gf into the hospital to visit me and my newborn. I filed for divorce in March 1993 after he still couldn't be bothered with being a husband and told me I was putting too much pressure on him to be a father. We never lived together in or out of wedlock, so how he came to this conclusion I do not know. He flitted in and out of her life for the first 3 years, then couldn't be bothered at all. We only got in contact as my daughter was curious to know who her father was - starting school and being the only child who didn't see her dad etc, and we met up in January 1999. She hated him at sight, and he decided that again, I was putting too much pressure on him to be a father. That was the last we saw or heard of him. I have never got a penny of support off him, and today, after nearly 18 years, I have a stunningly beautiful girl who I love to pieces and who I am so so proud of. Stuff him!!! I never met anyone serious in those 18 years, but I did it and she did it and we are a great team!!!

Megan - posted on 07/08/2010

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well to make a long story short i gave birth to very handsome boy almost 6 months ago and his dad and family are from turkey and us being together was forbidden let alone having a child together but we do have a child together and he and his family want nothing to do with him unless i agree to give my son to sister or something because i am not muslim and i am african-american although i still want his father in our sons life i know the likelyhood slim i still to this day love his father but being ashamed or embarassed of my son is no go and i dont want his negative family and friends in my sons life and since he cares so much about what they think of him and how they feel over our son i dont want him or his money

Bethany - posted on 07/08/2010

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I am a 29 year old single mother. Shortly after I turned 21 I met a man at a bar and began dating him and having unprotected sex. Stupid..? I know!!! But low and behold.. I end up pregnant. Shocker, isn't it.. sigh!! After living with her father for three years and trying to make our relationship work i got fed up of his drinking/drug use, and decided I wanted a better life for myself and my daughter. So here I am. And now she will be 8 years old this month. Her father lives in another state and rarely calls. His family sends care packages and refuses to come and see her. He claims to not be able to afford to visit our daughter. I am grateful for her, having my daughter is the best thing that has ever happened to me and she is a motivational force in my life.

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