almost 2 year old not wanting to fall asleep unless mommy and daddy are in the same room

Candice - posted on 01/19/2012

i am in the same dilemma as you! my son slept in my room with me while my husband was deployed until he was about 4 months old. i then put him in his bed in his own room and everything was great. my husband gets home and when it's bedtime, he just stood there watching his new and only son fall asleep every night. since he came home and did this all the time, our son won't go to sleep unless someone is there with him. i'd like to just put him in his crib and let it be but he doesn't stop crying when i do that. sometimes, i let him cry then come back a few minutes later after he's worn himself out (he's 2 now) and sit by him and then it doesn't take him long to sleep at all. now the crappier part is...he still wakes up at night and we used to get up and lay him back down, cover him up, play his music box and sit there til he fell back asleep again. but when my husband would do that, sometimes he'd fall asleep too and miss his alarm. so after that, he would just be too tired to sit there with him in the night and just take him into our bed where we could actually sleep. my son sleeps through the night about 1 out of 7 nights of the week. i'm tired of our child being a wedge between my husband and me. it's my bed, not my son's. last night, i took a couple xanax, went to bed, and didn't turn on the monitor at all. i slept all night! well, he did wake up when my husband was fixing to get up for work but that was ok. i can deal with that. i love my son, but i love "alone time" with my husband too. we have 3 kids and it seems like that's the only alone time we ever get without interruptions.



since you child isn't in a crib anymore, i would first try getting a child proof door knob thing and putting it on the inside of her door so that she can't get up and come into your room. that might be hard to do at first cause i know i can't stand for my kid to scream and cry. but if you still have a monitor or can hear her crying through the walls, get up and lay her back into her own bed, let her know you're still there and hopefully she'll fall asleep again and you can go back to bed. there are some cool comfort things, like i got one of those turtles for my son that has 3 different lights in it and show the constellation on the ceiling and walls, it's so cool. there are also little princess tents you can put onto a bed that are made for specifically sleeping in on the bed. that's cool too, almost like a safe cave for her. when my 7 year old wakes up sometimes from a bad dream, i let her put cartoons on in her room very quietly and watch it til she falls asleep. she needs a comfort thing. but who am i to give advice? i'm still struggling with my own 2 year old. it won't last forever though. that's what i tell myself and it's what i'm telling you now.

Tara - posted on 10/26/2011

If you still need help, I am a certified pediatric sleep consultant and would be happy to help you! You can find out more about me on my Facebook page www.facebook.com/tulsapediatricsleepconsulting