i really don't know what to do anymore

Jolene - posted on 02/14/2011

Maybe you could go meet your neighbors and explain that you are going to try to get your baby girl to sleep in her own bed for the next few days and to try and be patient with her trantrums while she transitions to this new experience. Keep communications open so they don't wonder but know what is happening when she is screaming.

Then put her in her bed and let her scream/or cry she will learn that screaming does not get her out and she will stop. It takes time to teach her this and will not happen the first time. She will learn it though. Remember you are teaching her. It will take time for her to learn it. Just like if you were teaching her to read. She would not learn to read the first lesson. Just like she will not learn to sleep in her own bed the first time, but she will learn give her time. If you pick her up or let her sleep with you again, you are teaching her to scream to get what she wants, and that is what she will learn. Just be patient.

I run an in home day care, and some children have tantrums or fits.But if they get what they are wanting after throwing the trantrums. You are teaching them that it worked. What you want is to retrain her/ or teach her that the tantrum won't work. That it is time to take a nap. They continue with the screaming/tantrums when they occasionally get what they are screaming for.

One day care child was prone to throwing tantrums. Each time she did I reminded her that it was not the way to act. Then removed her from the situation and had her sit on a chair. She would scream her little heart out at me. I would ask her if she was done. Finally she finished and said she was done. Then I reminded her that she could not play with that toy today, and we would try again tomorrow.

It didn't happen every day or for the same reason, but she did ocassionally throw these tantrums. She is now 4 years old and hasn't thrown a tanturm in a long time. (Maybe a year) My point is your child may be one who tries to throw tanturms for many different reasons. The advice is the same. TEACH/TRAIN her that it doesn't work for what she is trying to gain. It does take a while. This day child childs mom told me the other day. I can not believe how easy ____________has been lately to deal with and reason with. It is so NICE! The tantrums may not ever go away forever but they will become more managable and fewer as she learns alternate behavior patterns to help her communicate.

Good luck and stay firm, loving, and consistent.