4 month sleep issues

Allisonneely - posted on 03/06/2017 ( 6 moms have responded )

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So my baby girl just turned 4 Months on the 3rd of March and for about 2 weeks now she has went from being a great sleeper and sleeping almost all night with only one feeding and taking great naps all day to waking every 2 hours at night and taking 30 minute naps on the dot. I have never been this sleep deprived in my life and I feel like I'm about to loose my sanity. I'll spend what seems like forever trying to get her to sleep at night for her to wake up 30 minutes later and then once I get her back to sleep again she's up every 2 hours. Sometimes she will even wake up as soon a second I lay her down and I have to start all over agin. I hardly even get to sleep in my own room anymore (her crib is in our room because we live with my parents and there isn't room enough for her to have her own room) because she wakes my husband up too and I feel bad because he has to get up and go to work really early.There have been nights where I have literally just sat there and cried because I'm so tired and she just will not sleep. It's so frustrating too because I can tell she's tired. There isn't an option for me to sleep during the day either because she won't nap longer than 30 minutes anymore. I've read about the four month sleep regression and she is also going trough the 4th "leap" according to the wonder weeks..my app says she has 8 days left. but I just keep feeling like this will never end and that it's not just a phase. I just want to feel like myself again.. I'm so miserable and it's so hard to be happy about anything right now. I just need to hear that other moms have went through similar situations and that it got better. How did you get through it and what did you do to make it better? I just need some serious encouragement. :(

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Sarah - posted on 03/07/2017

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Since my kids are 20, 18, 15 and nearly 13...I am not too sure about the sleep regression. I don't think that was even a recognized phenomenon when mine were tiny. However, I did nurse all of mine and they all did stuff like you describe; be sleeping well and then switch to crying every hour all night for a time. I always chalked it up to growth and it would last about a week. I get what you mean about having to ask your hubby for help, I felt the same way. He had to get up every morning and was gone all day so I did not want to dump a baby on him during his time off. Looking back, I should have asked for help. An hour and a half nap would have made night time much easier. My second child did not like to be held when she slept and now that she is older I know it is because she got hot (she has always been a hot potato and I'd find her stripped naked as a toddler all of the time!). For her, putting her in the swing helped a ton.
My mom always told me that no baby ever died from crying. So if you need to get away, then take a break for a bit. But it is hard to let a baby cry and you won't spoil her with frequent nursing or lots of love. Babies are like tuning forks for your emotions, so if you are getting stressed she will sense that and be more tense as well. A glass of wine might help? Another thought is to get out for a walk during the day if you can. I found fresh air made mine babies sleep better. Keep on venting here, it will help a bit to know you are not alone!

Dove - posted on 03/07/2017

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No, no, no CIO. It's really not 'appropriate' at any age. A few minutes of fussing is no big deal (especially if you need a few minutes to calm YOURSELF and 'regroup' before dealing w/ her), but please do not ever just leave her in her crib to cry and cry. Babies don't actually learn to calm themselves from that... they just learn that crying is pointless cuz no one will come for them... and that isn't something you ever want your child to 'learn'.

You said she will settle if you are cradling her... so can you cradle her and both get some sleep? Honestly right now the best thing to do is whatever it takes, so you can both sleep.

Allisonneely - posted on 03/06/2017

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My parents are currently out of town so it's not an option for them to help during the evenings right now :( they would definitely help if they were here though. I just feel bad asking my husband not because I think he would say no but because I hate for him to have to be at work all day and then come home to deal with a fussy baby. She won't settle down at all unless I'm cradling her.. I've tried holding her by my side while laying down and laying her on my chest and she fights it. :/And yes I am nursing her & a growth spurt could be a very real possibility. Did any of your kids go through the "four month sleep regression" because she fits the bill for that but I just always second guess everything. I'm just getting to the point where I don't know what else to do besides lay her in her crib at night and let her cry..but I don't know if she is still too young for that or not?? I literally just don't know what to do.

Sarah - posted on 03/06/2017

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I promise you that this is temporary. I know how you feel, I have four kids! My eldest cried for hours non-stop for three full months. Your baby is possibly going thru a growth spurt (are you nursing?) She may bee teething too. I know you feel like you are on the brink of insanity, but you can get thru this! Try napping with her resting on your chest, you may be surprised that she will settle in for a few hours and you can snooze too. Would it be possible for you to ask your parents or your hubby to watch her in the evening, so you can nap before you face the night alone with her?
Hang in there mama! It is going to pass before you know it!

Dove - posted on 03/06/2017

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Oh... and before he was night weaned at 2ish... he was up 1-5 times/night in a 10 hour night. So... yep, my barely 2 year old slept like your 4 month old many, many nights. lol

Dove - posted on 03/06/2017

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Well... if it makes you feel any better my son slept ON me every night for the first 5 months of his life. Due to him making noises in his sleep (we've always shared a room) AND his reflux... having me propped upright in the middle of my bed and his laying upright on his belly against my chest was the ONLY way we both would get any sleep. I'm also almost positive he never napped longer than 45 minutes (and 20 minutes was common) until he was down to only one nap a day... so around 14/15 months. AND... he only slept through the night a handful of random times until he was over 2. But... once he started sleeping through the night consistently it pretty much stuck and stuck good. Sure there are the nights of illness, bad dreams, or growing pains, but those are pretty few and far between.

I know you are exhausted and it seems like this will never end... but I promise you that it will... even if it takes a lot longer than you would prefer. ♥

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