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Anger problems?

Amanda - posted on 04/24/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I am begining to think my 18 month old has anger issues, he makes a grawling sound and grits his teeth, he has also started throwing himself backwards, some times hurting himself, he screams and yells NO NO NO NO for no reason, He wines when he is in the car seat in the car, when I ask him to stop he screams louder and yells no over and over again! He has also decided that changing in to pjs is a bad thing and pulls his shirt back over his head and wont let me take his pants off with out unclenching his hands form the waist band, this inturn causes another screaming fit and crying, this happens again in the morring! He slaps and kicks and punches, and this can happen for no reason other then I didnt get his morrning Orange juice fast enough or bath time is over, I know he is not mentily chalenged because he is doing well and even advanced in every other way, he counts to 5 by him self, is in the begining stage of potty training and doing well, he talks and runs and jumps and uses a spoon or fork well with every meal too, he can color and wants to help, but when things are just not perfact for his liking he almost seems unreachable and dare I say odd...

I'm worried, if I can get any advise or if anyone else is going though this and how you deal with it I would be thankful.

Thank you !

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3 Comments

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Danielle - posted on 03/25/2011

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My sister-in-law was having anger issues with her 3 year old. She would try punishment but nothing worked. Finally a social worker at her sons school suggested making a "safe chair". Its a chair/beanbag, put in a corner of the house (not their room) where they can go and tantrum themselves out. Similar to a time out, but more friendly. She took the advice and made a nice corner with a bean bag and pictures of things my nephew likes, and its been working. He still gets mad, but now its contained. Even when a child can communicate normally, there can be things they can't completely express and anger is their best option. With the safe chair they can go there surrounded by things that make them happy and work it all out with them-self. At 18 months, its probably just the terrible twos coming on, and it is almost impossible to get them to sit in one spot. But if the extreme anger continues this could be an option. Best of luck!

Sherrie - posted on 03/25/2011

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what about when they throw a flashlight at your head? when he gets mad he throws whatevers in his hands and this morning, the flashlight landed with my eye and now has a nasty little bruise what to do?

Kelly - posted on 04/25/2010

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He sounds like a typical 18 month old--heading into the terrible twos a little early. My son did it too....In fact, the two's weren't that bad, it was the months leading up to the big 2 that was so hard!

How are you disciplining him now? It's hard to recommend when we don't know what you are currently doing.



With my son, I ignored the carseat tantrums. He just wanted me to get him out of the seat, and obviously I wouldn't do that. Telling him to stop, just made it worse, so I let him whine. After a couple weeks, he stopped--it's not worth the effort to whine if he gets no reaction from me :)



If he is having a tantrum over something like you not getting juice fast enough, just let him scream and stay happy. Strap him into a high chair, pack & play, or someplace safe and let him holler while you straighten up, stop to smile at him every few minutes and ask if he's happy yet. Eventually, your cheeriness will rub off on him. Just make sure you act overly happy when he does some good things too so he won't start resorting to tantrums to put you in a "happy mood." The perform for your reaction, and sometimes, believe it or not, they WANT to make us mad. But they also want to make us happy, so just make sure that no matter what he does, he will not make you mad. eventually, he will learn he gets more attention by making you happy than making you mad.

hope that helps, keep posting :)

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