ANY OTHER Grandmothers have NO ACCESS to thier grandchildren?

Raels - posted on 04/02/2010 ( 65 moms have responded )

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I am a grandmother of 8months havent seen my granddaughter since age of 6months all because of a stupid misunderstanding "QUITE PETTY & IMMATURE I MUST SAY!" because circle of moms has me listed as having 3 children..I have a DAUGHTER (DEC) n a SON n 1 granddaughter.BUT son's partner took it I "SNATCHED & claimed my granddaughter to be my own.BECAUSE she was listed on this as 1 of my own WFT???

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[deleted account]

My daughter is 6 months old. When she was first born it was really hard for me dealing with my mother in law. I always felt that she was judging me, and when she would say "let me see my little girl" I would get FURIOUS and remind her that she is MY little girl.

I think that it bothered me so much, because my hormones were still out of control, and before I had my baby my mother in law was just my husbands mother...now she is MY child's grandparent. Before my daughter, I didn't have to deal with her very much, but now that she is related to my daughter, not just my husband, I have to deal with her a lot more.

I do understand why she was mad, you listed her baby as your own. I understand that it was a mistake on your part, and circle of moms listed you have 3 children, even when you listed you are a grandparent to the third. She probably feels threatened. As a new mom, we are trying to do our best, and learning everyday. I get VERY upset with my MIL because when I post a new album of my daughter on facebook she decides to "share" it so everyone on HER friends list can see MY child. She will put the whole album to her profile and title it "Look at my little girl" I get so mad because she is MINE and I don't think she has a right to post pictures of my baby so her whole friendslist can see.
You keep saying that this is the ONLY incident for them to cut you off. This can not be true. Even if you don't know about it, I am sure there is something else. For you to think that this incident is childish, and Immature makes me assume that if you weren't cut off you would not know how upset it made her. I don't think that any sane person would cut off a grandparent for something this small. Do you always refer to your grandbaby as your own? Maybe thats why she cut you off. Do you have a drinking problem? (I ask because my MIL does, and we only give her limited supervised access to our baby) are you always coming over unannounced?
I am very sorry you are going through this, I just really do think there is something that you are not seeing, which made them cut you off.

Kim - posted on 04/11/2010

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It is kind of sad, Raels, that even after I told you both on this blog AND in personal messages, step by step directions on how to correct the Circle of Mom's information AND how to make things right with you son and 'daughter-in-law' you choose to do nothing.

If I lived in Ann Arbor, I would come by and change it myself!

It is very clear you only want to sit on your high horse and make others feel sorry for you. Circle of Moms is for HELPING women deal with the trials and tribulations of MOTHERHOOD, not MARTYRHOOD.

Wether you get 50 or 100 people to agree with you, You are still not seeing your granddaught OR your son. Their words of comfort will never have that sweet smell of baby you get from snuggling them under your chin.

So march yourself over to "Ross" with flowers and an apology to her and ask your son to help you 'fix' Ellah's info.

It really is a small thing to do to get Ellah and Aaron back into your lifes.

Kim - posted on 04/07/2010

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Raels,

I'm sorry you are in this situation. But it doesn't matter if you were or she was at fault. It is only the last straw that breaks the camel's back, all the other ones had a hand in it too. What matters is your being able to interact with Ellah and your son, your daughter-in-law is a bonus. So here's how I see it:

Bottom line - you want to see your granddaughter!

How do you get there? - humble yourself


No one is ever completely innocent (except your granddaughter).

First: Change your "children's" page. Instead of Ellah, put Granddaughter Ellah as her first name. (You knew this bothered her terribly, yet 2 months later, you still haven't corrected the insinuation that Ellah was birthed by YOU. (a little telling of your attitude and sensitivity))

Delete your NO ACCESS post and responses, esp. this one, if at all possible. She may be reading it herself, and this would not be good for your cause.

Give it two days. (she/he may see your post or a mutual party may tell her about it)

Second - Pray. Pray that God show you what you need to know. Pray that you are well-received when you make the next step. Pray that He give you the words to repair the wounds, heal the hurts.


Then : Go to her house. Flowers in hand. A heart-felt apology must be the first words out of your mouth, and mean it. Whatever you have to do to get back into her good graces, DO IT. Keep your eye-on-the-prize so-to-speak, Ellah! Take with you a written apology addressed to her, just in case she doesn't open the door. (be sure to leave it with the flowers if you don't get a chance to talk to HER. not your son)

Example of letter: I am so terrible sorry I hurt you. It was never my intent to cause you pain. (you finish the rest. remember not to make excuses, only apologize)

Lastly, wait for a response and pray. If a month passes without an invitation back into THEIR family, try again. You can also use the postal service to contact her. (only after you have tried step 3)

My friends who have lost their parents early have cleeved onto their in-laws like nobodies business. Stop using that as an excuse. People naturally want to belong, not isolate the ones they love, as you make it out.

She is the Gatekeeper. Whatever it takes, Ellah will benefit from a loving relationship with her grandparents. Remember it is a privilege, not an entitlement, to see your grandchildren.
as far as your original post:
*not petty, being a mom is a BIG deal
*immature-your son is 23, how old could she be?,
*your age doesn't guarantee maturity or a lack there of
*not a misunderstanding, you DID claim her as your own
circle of mom's didn't do it, YOU listed 3 kids. Take responsibility
consider: If they are NOT married and you make things too difficult for her, she can leave with Ellah and you and YOUR SON may never see them again. Think of what you ALL could lose.

lastly, I quote you "WFT???" first it is WTF and second, respectable grandmothers don't say that, and certainly not in public


"EYE ON THE PRIZE" while praying for a reconciliation

Rebecca - posted on 04/07/2010

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Alls I can say is that being a mother in law you need to be very careful.... I would try to make little to no mistakes as much as possible. Im sure you being a mum once would know how it feels when these little things turn out to be big things.... the internet is not face to face & can show no feelings it also makes it much harder to judge.... just tread lightly & politely. Listen more & Talk less... From a mum that isn't the greatest fan of her MIL & has visiting boundaries in place for her own sanity !

Renee - posted on 04/06/2010

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Just keep trying. I have a grandma that didn't try to be in my life until I was older. And now that I have two kids I see how she favors the other grandkids and greatgrand kids she has. It hurts very much. My daughter is two and she hasn't came to anything for her. My son is 4.5 months old and has only seen him 3 times. I am not forcing them on her because if she doesn't want them like she didn't want me then i dont want them hurting like me. So if you want contact with her, suck it up apologize for the misunderstanding and correct it. Your son's partner has a right to be mad if he wants. if you want your granddaughter in your life you have to abide by her parents rules. Its sad that this happened, but they have final say. I am sure you wont like my post, but just think if your parent did that to your kids, how would you feel?

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[deleted account]

Kim, I too have tried to help her....it's a lost cause. I actually feel sorry for the daughter-in-law, because I am sure she has had to deal with this martyr for years.

Diane - posted on 04/09/2010

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I guess I am not understanding why your daughter in law would find this a big deal. When I joined Circle of Mother's I had a heck of a time entering information in and getting it to stick in the right way. Sometimes computer programs do this, they get bugs. Bugs can be fixed. Instead of saying you can't see your granddaughter any more why don't they help you fix it.
Besides, if it was my Mom I would have chucked it up to computer inexperience anyway and had a good laugh.
I'm sorry you are going through this :(

Zatonda - posted on 04/08/2010

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I understand some things for the older generation can be hard for us to catch on to as fast as the younger generation, I myself had go a re-do things with other sites cause I had no clue what I was doing,. however time is ticking and just tell her sorry that you made a silly mistake. So not worth it. It sounds like if something that small would upset her, there were problems way before this page. If that is who your son married then you have to respect her even if you don't like it. If she is a good wife and mother, just accept what you can't change if you wish to be a part of your grandchild life.

Tammy - posted on 04/08/2010

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Thats immature on her part.Im sorry that you have to go through that.I have 8 grandchildren and I could not imagine not seeing them.Have you tried to talk to her ?

Kathy - posted on 04/08/2010

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My son & so called daughter in law take the 2 grandkids i love in & out of my life so much ...i just can't stand it anymore. It is so unfair to me, my husband & especially those kids. We haven't seen them for a year this time & not sure if we will ever see them again.

Paula - posted on 04/07/2010

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i am sorry for your loss as a mother i do understand this also as a daughter my mother has not been in my childrens life for years and allot is by her own selfishness there has to be more then just that i do not understand these parents today the littlest wording and they are all upset i would love to have my parents in my childrens life but i as a mother i would be at there door steps and sitting them both down and talking with them that is your child and all tho you do not have the say you should try as hard to make things right! not just so you can see your grand daughter he was your baby before she was here and that relationship should be fixed also with the mate respect her im not saying that is not the case but sometimes a few little words can change the whole thing good luck to you

Tara - posted on 04/07/2010

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well my situation is alot different than yours.. but my father hasn't met either of my boys and he won't as far as i'm concerned..again my situation is ALOT different and if that is the case they are stupid and need to be told so!

Sheree - posted on 04/07/2010

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There is clearly more to this situation hence why raels has stopped replying to everyone. I would love to hear her son and daughter in laws side of the story. remember there is always two sides to a story and a lot of people have automatically sided with the OP instead of thinking that there is another side and wondering what her son and daughter in law are going through.

Nicole - posted on 04/07/2010

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I wouldn't care if a grandparent listed my child, under their name..Why else would you be called a grandparent if you weren't a parent to the child lol...Some people are truely just wierd... My parents have not seen their grandchildren either for awhile, and my parents have bought these kids everything from clothing to food, and my sister everythig as well, including a car, and giving her bf a job, and he has turned around and now is trying to sue my parents for 10grand!! Claiming he wants that as a bonus from when he quit??!! and since my parents were mad at my sister about this, my sister says she wants nothing to do with them anymore as it is not her sueing its the bf lol but they are still together!!?? but anyways im sure your situation will clear up but I dont think this one will...

Natalie - posted on 04/07/2010

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my daughter have a very big family! her father is no longer with us and i still make a point of letting her see his side...that is not right! i feel sad for you cuz your missing out...i hope things work out for you!!

Kayla - posted on 04/07/2010

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Ok I think that you daughter in-law is being a little crazy, but if my mother in-law would of done that I would of been very annoyed too. Regardless I would find it in my heart for you to see your grand baby. My mother in law currently has nothing to do with me or my son and if she never does I will not be heart broken by any means. She has done much worse things to me though. So examples are when we first told her we were pregnet she argued with me and said I wasn't, than a few weeks after that she said my baby was her boyfriends and we had been sleeping tougher, than I let her in the dilavery room and made it very clear to her that there were no pictures until the baby goes on the warming table, only to find out she video taped the whole thing, and the last thing that finally set me off was she threw my husband a going away party behind my back after I had been planning one for a month and a half, than she proceed to go to my sister in law and talk shit about me and when I confronted her she had the nerve to tell me I was acting like I was in high school. So if all you did was make a little mistake I don't see why she can't forgive you.

Derika - posted on 04/07/2010

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i have kept my son from two grandparents for good reasons.....i came from an abusive home and my father would not respect boundaries or wishes so he is not allowed near my child and my husbands mother would belittle me, make snide comments, constantly down our parenting, and try to pit me and my husband against each other. we did try to talk it out with both of them.....but unfortunately age is just a number and maturity did not apply and they could not respect our wishes/boundaries. maybe you should reach out and ask her why she feels threatened by this? it sounds like you have alot of anger about this....try to calm down when you speak with them or else you will fall on deaf ears.

[deleted account]

Maybe try writing a letter and explain what really happened and tell them to try adding a grandchild on FB for themselves like Emma did and they'll see that it was the system and not you being bad.

[deleted account]

OMG that's crazy and I feel so bad for you! Is she really young? Maybe she's still just super immature and with the baby being her first she's over reacting. I hope you can get it worked out. A child needs it's grandparents.

Yolanda - posted on 04/07/2010

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I have a six month old son, and my mother-in-law, well she is ver judgemental, there are boundries as this my son my family my hubby and I created, but it doesnt not matter how judgmental, she is I always allow her to see her grandson as family is important, and I want him growing up to know that, at the end of the day they will see they are been silly a grandchild needs their grandparents god bless and good luck xx

Brittany - posted on 04/06/2010

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omg, im so sorry. that is rediculous.. i feel so bad for you, & i hope you get to see your beautifull grandchildren soon. Im only 19, and i honestly, could never keep my son away from his grandparents. Im sure your granddaughter misses you very much.

Marcie - posted on 04/06/2010

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I am sorry to hear this. I stopped allowing my mother and step dad to see my daughter because when they had offered to watch my daughter at 2 months for an hour, i told them the bottle was in the fridge and already had gas drops in it and everything. Well after 45 minutes we were back mainly cause we missed our little girl and it was the first time we had left her alone with them,well they decided that gas drops weren't enough so they gave her a mc donalds straw full of beer. They said she had gas and i said i had put gas drops in it already. May i remind u that she was only 2 months old. I was so angry and upset that they would throw my trust in them to be good grandparents out the window. I had to wait until we were more then half way home to let my husband know about cause i knew that if i told him there he would have deceked my step dad in the face. But they got to see her this past x-mas cause my grandpa is dieing and it was the only time everyone on that side of my family would be together, it was the first time they also got to see their grandson i had back in may of 08. But your situation is a little different and kinda pointless, your best bet would be to say to them that it was a total misunderstanding and atleast u don't go behind their backs giving your grand child beer. If that isn't enough let them read this comment.

[deleted account]

as a mom she held that child in her tummy for 9 mths and then gave birth to it... as you know.... so she is entitled to be angry that someone was trying to take her place.... why do you think she thinks you did it on purpose.... did yall not have a good relationship in the first place... my husbands family isnt involved in our family by any means... but overstepping boundaries with my family seems to be the only argument we have and its taken alot for all of us to understand what upsets who and why... try sending a letter to them being sincere but trust me getting on a public forum and making her seem like a horrible mother for protecting her child from what she sees as a threat or a bad situation isnt making it better... time heals all...and if they want a relationship then they will come back but forcing them to reconcile when not ready will only make things worse and hold it over your head.....

Nikki - posted on 04/05/2010

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yes we talk thru skype and facebook,, hopefully ill get her to come bac 1 day

Kryss - posted on 04/05/2010

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When my son was 5 yrs old my mother in law wanted to put his name and birthday in the newspaper, i agreed ...a week later my mom calls me angry and wanted to know if i knew that my mother inlaw had put herself down as my sons mother and his granpa as his dad...i had not seen the paper but,i remained calm ( the mother in law and i never seen eye to eye and still dont but my hopes were it was a simple mistake) well i called the mother in law and asked her wht happened and her reply was " I was hoping you didnt see that, it was to late by the time i noticed it to change it and apologized." welldont go thinking i was not mad or even bothered by it...but i let it go and just listened carefully and made sure bc my son def knows whom his momma is. A few weeks had went by and my sister calls and my mother in law had taken my son out to eat and my sister over heard my mother in law call herself momma in front of my son...later i confrnted my mother in law, i then told her she would never see my son ifit didnt stop. I went through alot of things with my inlaws but,i can tell you i have never kept my son away from them. It is no mystery that there will always be problems with them but could never really do that. Give your son and his wife some time...and when they do come back around act as normal as you can..it is true there were times that things my mother in law did just kept building up and...and then one small thing happened and i couldnt help but not explode...i dont know your life ..or the situation well enough to say who is wrong but just remember that time heals and ppl do forgive:)

Amy - posted on 04/05/2010

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Power to the Grammys! And all women need their Grammy's it will just take time.... in the mean time I will say a lil prayer! God bless you!

Jennifer - posted on 04/05/2010

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Oh my goodness! That is the most immature thing I have ever heard! My mom is very immature and causes lots of drama and even though I won't let my girl stay with her without my supervision for a while, i would NEVER keep my daughter away from her or my mother-in-law. I think grandparents are a very important part to any kid's lives!

I am sorry that is happening and I wish that it wasn't. Grandkids need their grandparents and vice versa. Grandparents are the breath of fresh air every kid needs from their parents ;)

Raels - posted on 04/05/2010

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AWW thankyou Priscilla soo sweet ...OF course when i seen her i would call her MY little princess lol.. there was no problems with that & i would tell them they should be proud of the way they are handling being first time parents ...so glad your family is fantastic for you : ) hagd

Priscilla - posted on 04/05/2010

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Mrs Burman I feel so bad for you My Daughter Grandmother refers to her as her baby and in no way do I find it offensive as a matter of fact I think its her way of showing how much she adorns her new granny its unfortunate that she was so unsettled by what was cleary a mistake but even if it were not a mistake its not that big of a deal my goodness.God bless u and i hope they get there act together.

Raels - posted on 04/05/2010

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CARLY i remember that many many moons ago lol.(sweetys) WE did try n speak to our son but wat his fiance says is 100% correct we are just the stupid"parents" lmao

OUR SON came bk with I LOVE ------- < his partner & .........< his daughter more than i ever did you n dad so we are saying your not ....'s Grandparents anymore lose our number enjoy ur life & stop bothering us!!..mmm fair enough i am not trying to split them or anything lol.they do get set in their ideas and beliefs n stand by them no matter what anyone else says...ATTITUDE!!! lol....it is very cruel of them ..they will wake up one day .I only hope it isn't when it's too late!..THE ONLY other reason we can think of is very mixed up of our son having us n she has no parents...I know its sad but there are lots of ppl that suffer terribly in this world..I know my problem is minor but very hurtful... but her ... well i am afraid she can seek lots of pity off certain people who fall for it...i fell for it at first n supported her right through preg n birth.. but looks like she has had enough ... sorry if i rambled on there.. 1/2 asleep lol n cant be bothered re reading n editing ... hag1 thankyou again :o)

Carly - posted on 04/05/2010

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I don't think that is a good enough reason why you DIL would stop you seeing your granddaughter. Maybe ask your son? Ask him if the reason is not just what she claimed to have seen, wether it goes deeper? Could have been something in the past that bothered her and that just gave her a reason to stop access. It's terribly unfair to your granddaughter as there is nothing like a Grandma to go and see and get some sweety's off! lol

Raels - posted on 04/05/2010

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OHH heather i feel for you I can't imagine something like that , but have heard of it...STAY STRONG YOUR son will be as proud as punch when old enough to see the
light TOUGH decisions needed to be made there i only hope your life gets brighter & brighter!!! Thankyou for your support tc

[deleted account]

I'm not a grandmother...but I am in a situation where I don't have any relationship with my mother, nor do I see a likelihood anytime soon of her seeing my son. However, our situation is a little different. My mother is a drug addict who does whatever she can to use people - manipulation, guilt trips, lies, sex, anything. She has in the past given a baby too high of a dose of cough syrup when he was crying too much for her, show up drunk to watch my nieces, spend $550 that was supposed to go to my sister for her daughter's medication (money that wasn't hers, it was money her friend had sent to her to forward on to my sister because she wouldn't allow that friend to send it directly to my sister), and that's just the tip of the iceberg. Even saying all this, it still hurts me that the chance is high that my son won't know one of his grandparents; though the fact remains that every time I think about the things she's done to me, to my sister, to innocent children, it makes me madder than hell and strengthens my resolve. I do, however, have my father listed on here as his grandfather - I did that listing, not him, so I don't know if the same glitch is apparent there. On my profile, it has 'Michael Williams is Joshua Michael's grandfather.' Don't know how it shows up on his. But my point is that my father and I have had our issues in the past, and certainly more serious than simply how things are listed on a facebook application - but I wouldn't shut him out of his only grandson's life, not when he's doing everything that he can to be a part of both our lives. I simply don't think that family should be shut out without a very good reason, so I'm very sorry that you're being made a pariah by your own family. I hope it resolves soon.

Raels - posted on 04/05/2010

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AWW NIKKI so very sorry that is very tough for you too as well as him & grandparents..ALTHOUGH it's not the same as in person do you both have internet links at all? Just a thought you probably have thought of anyways :)

Raels - posted on 04/05/2010

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Hi Emma yes we tried to contact admin as soon as it happened,my hubby also sent emails to facebook itself..they both don't reply to emails .Thankyou for backing me on that this has been hard to explain... take care nice chatting hag1

Emma - posted on 04/05/2010

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Hi, Raels
I just tested out adding a make believe grand kid to my profile and the exact thing you said happened even though i selected the grandmother option as my relationship my fictional grandchild pooped up as one of my own on my profile.
If i where you i would contact the admin and explain that this glitch in there profile system has cost you dearly and to please fix it and send out notification to all members as to prevent this happening to anyone else.

Nikki - posted on 04/05/2010

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sorry about that, i am not a grandmother my self but my mum lives in spain and ma little boy is 16 months old and she hasnt seen him yet, would do anything for her 2 come back here

Emma - posted on 04/05/2010

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I suppose life and its experiences lead us all to different conclusions.
It was my fathers death that brought me to mine. i missed out on having the type of relationship i wanted with him because of trying to keep the peace .
I refuse to let other peoples Shit excuses my French interfere with things that are important to me ever again.
And my little family is all that counts to me, and thanks i am strong life made me that.

Raels - posted on 04/05/2010

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YOU must be a very strong person emma,I am not LIFE is too short to hold grudges i feel & have felt since we lost our daughter @ age of 5 to epilepsy.(22yrs) ago..that taught me to FORGIVE N FORGET ( if given the chance to) because NO ONE ever knows what is around the corner..is my strong belief....i really do appreciate your veiws tho.. everyone is different for different reasons... hey thats life :o) If we all thought the same way we would be BORED LOL!

Emma - posted on 04/05/2010

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I was talking in general teams not about anyone's particular circumstance's
All i know is there are people who once where part of my life and are not any more, i used to put up with things when it was just me but now i have kids i have no qualms with getting rid of anyone who can not abide by my family's (myself, husband and kids) boundaries and basic common curtsey and behaviour.
I know there are a few ex friends and family members who to this day would swear blind that they have never done anything wrong. and would say that they have no clue as to the reasons they have been excluded.
The truth is they know full well they where told many time's and chose to ignore what i was saying.
3 strikes and your out .....

Emma - posted on 04/05/2010

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I feel bad for you that have been excluded or have strained relations with family.
But what i have come to realise is that just because you are related to someone it dose not mean they are good to have in your life or the lives of your children.
I think people place too much emphasis on Blood over Behaviour.
I do not let people into my life or that of my children's just because we share some genetics, they must add value to you life as you hopefully do for them in there's. Otherwise what are we teaching our kid ? that bad behaviour is unacceptably from everyone else but you must just let it slide if your are related.

Deborah - posted on 04/05/2010

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Well. I can see why she might feel unsettled by the fact that you had her daughter listed as yours on the profile but it's just ridiculous that they have cut all ties with you rather than just asking "hey? how come you are listed as having three kids on your profile" since you have explained the reason and the mistake of fbook perfectly to us surely the mature response would have been for them to listen to your explanation!

Ashley - posted on 04/05/2010

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I am not a grandmother but my son's grandparents on his father side don't have much to do with him. Main reason we are living overseas. BUT when we do come to visit they know exactly where we are staying and never come to see their grandson. Last time we were home my mother in law only came to where we were staying once and that was only b/c she was picking her son up so they could go to the hospital together to visit someone. I hate that they really don't have much to do with their grandson. I would love for them to be more involved but they aren't. When my husband talks to his mother she never asks how our son is doing or how I'm doing. When I was pregnant we got in an arguement and I told her that I wasn't going to bring my son around her b/c of the way she was acting and she told me that was fine until they confirm it is their grandson first. This woman burns me up soo bad. I don't know what to do. In a way I don't want my son going over to their house b/c they live in filth and I don't want my son in a place like that. Their animals deficate all over their floors and it stinks of ammonia and place they have lots of mold cuz their place is so old. So I don't feel comfortable having my son there. Another thing, she is always talking about my husbands ex girlfriends son...that could possible be my husbands. She gets him things talks to that woman all the time and everything. Has her grand-daughters around all the time but doesn't seem to want to have anything to do with my son. It drives me nuts! I wish she would at least send him a card or something....something to show that she's thinking about him ya know? Sorry for complaining about my situation but yours made me wish that my mother in law gave a crap like you.

Raels - posted on 04/04/2010

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SILLY isn't it? What worries me more in the fact,that hubby of 29yrs has already had 3 heart attacks,lung problems ,crohns ect.he is 57 & me 55...I am sure they will regret it someday...she is our first grandchild....some family have mentioned visitation rights but ummm i hate the thought of added stress. thankyou michelle very frustrating for you too.

Michelle - posted on 04/04/2010

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yes im 42 and have 7 children six boys and 1 girl,the girl is the oldest and she is the mother of my two grandsons aged 5yrs and 4yrs and also grandaughter who is3yrs.my daughter is also doing the same thing to me except she does this to me quite often all i can do is sit back and wait.there is no point in dragging this through the courts as it only makes things worse.hopefully my daughter will realize one day that she is only hurting her children.just try and be possitive.you will eventually see your grandchild.

Raels - posted on 04/04/2010

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THANKYOU SOOO MUCH i just call it PLAIN OUT RIGHT CRUEL! lol .. However i am aware there are alot more worse off than us.

Sunshine - posted on 04/04/2010

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I don't see that as a big deal its quit childish if you ask me.. Specially put your own mother through something like this.. Its just the internet.. Thats crazy.. Again your very welcome.. Im sure things will get better for you, well I pray that it does!

Raels - posted on 04/04/2010

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WE WISH!!! thankyou for your support..WE were FURIOUS with FBOOK for having me down as mom of 3 instead of MOM of 2 & grandmother of 1 !

Sunshine - posted on 04/04/2010

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Yeah we have web cam and everything but my mom won't get on the computer & my husbands mom don't care for the computer cause thats what she does with her job.. I do get on web cam with my STEP mother in law tho.. Like my mom and them have a facebook so they can see pics and stuff.. I am sorry you have to go through that you should be able to see your grandkids no matter what...:( But your more then welcome!

Cristina - posted on 04/04/2010

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Ok, I'm not a granny yet, but I would be feeling the complete opposite if some one loved my child as one of heir own, I would be happy that he has more people out there who love him so much. I have a friend who's daughter, now 13 is like my own, she even calls me her second mom, and I would do anything for her as much as her real mum would, is all about the love you have for that little person. Your daughter in law has to grow up, and stop denying your grandchild her grams.

Raels - posted on 04/04/2010

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SHEREE, when i joined circle of moms,they ask you to list your children,soi listed my 2...then listed my granddaughter.I ticked Grandmother as relationship..but on my profile it has the heading of MOM OF 3...I gather it might be the American way as the word MOTHER is in grandmother also??? very confusing but its not the way i listed her.Hope this helps

Raels - posted on 04/04/2010

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Thankyou sunshine I feel for you that makes things awkward...Do they have the NET i was only thinking of web cams may help to be intouch?.SAD for your son too.

Sunshine - posted on 04/04/2010

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Man I am sorry.. Im not a grandmother but my mom don't get to see her grandson nor does my husbands parents but its not our fault cause if they really wanted to they could fly here to see him.. My husband is Army which means we travel but we are working on going back east so that they can spend time I think its immature for someone to keep a child from their family! Im sorry

Raels - posted on 04/04/2010

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NO Sheree,We never bothered them always there when they needed us...never nagged..only offered advice when asked... game them what ever they needed.ALL i can put it down to maybe,Is because of the sad passing of her own parents early in life..she cant handle our son having parents..(i know that is weird ) but they both can be stubborn & focus on what they believe & no one can talk about it..lol if you know what i mean ..I always ask anything we need to talk about feel free I am a very easy person to get on with...Before the baby arrived they have done this to us 3 times before... n left us hanging.BUT we thought ok let them have their run..months passed things never worked out so they get in touch again & we help them out?I wish there was a way to fix the problem I think they believe they have their family no need for others.Another thing that annoyed me after all this blew out was the fact my hubby son's dad,had angina attack... he has had 3 heart attacks in the past.I let them know this but they failed to contact us or inquire on how he is...WE live 3/4hr away frm them but we go when they needed us... they dont drive...i think i went on a bit there sorry.I do appreciate your thoughts tho..thankyou for your wishes too .

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