Any other mothers have or are dealing with this?

Jessica - posted on 01/29/2013 ( 18 moms have responded )

3

0

0

I have been a stay at home mom since my son was born and now I'm bout to have a daughter. I also believe I have been suffering from postpartum depression for a while now. Its like a never ending roller coaster with my own mind. I just don't know how to kick this in the butt. I have been doing research on how to get help, but so far no luck. Any other mothers out there going through this or have gone through this before. I'm on edge.......

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

[deleted account]

I went through PPD first with my oldest daughter, though it was mild with her. Then when I had my twins it happened again but more severely, with very bad panic attacks. I finally worked up the courage to talk to my doctor about it, they put me on a very low dose of Paxil, an anti-depressant. They also suggested therapy but it did not work for me. The Paxil took the edge off and I was able to function. I am still on it, and my twins are nearly 3 years old. I have no problems being on meds, would rather take them than suffer through all that stuff again.

Tracey - posted on 01/31/2013

236

440

0

If you're still pregnant you should really talk to your doctor. This is most likely a hormone imbalance, and you don't want it to affect the baby or put you in danger during childbirth. Don't try to self-medicate during pregnancy!

Patricia Ann - posted on 01/29/2013

121

0

32

goodluck with this,there is alot of help out there for you ,its up to you to find the right type of help you will need,

Patricia Ann - posted on 01/29/2013

121

0

32

to be honest I had this bad enough at one time and I was dangerous,to others and lashed out in a very negative way and started getting physical,this wasnt really me so I got the help finnally before I became I became any darker so to speak....

[deleted account]

Everyone has to cope in their own way. You must custom design the help that you need for yourself. The kids' constant attention is nothing less than, exhausting. I ask myself daily, "What are they learning from me today?" Everything that they know, they learn from us. There is amazing joy from knowing that I am shaping them into the men that they will become, even through my darkest moments. I am a terrible phone conversation, but if you would like to talk privately about anything, message me. For me it helps to have someone to be open with, whatever needs to be said...

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

18 Comments

View replies by

Lilie - posted on 02/15/2013

23

0

2

I have also been a stay-at-home mom after my son was born (now 17 mo. old), and am due to have my daughter May 1st. It has been one big emotional roller-coaster. Yoga helps a lot, when I'm able to go, which is once or twice a month, but given that I used to teach yoga and my husbands schedule fluctuates so much, it has been hard to keep my schedule. I have waited until everyone is asleep, and I lay down, or sit-up in meditation, close my eyes and scan the inside of my body relaxing myself, starting from my head to my toes. Then I scan again and tell each part of my body and organs that I love it. I say "I love you!" to myself and to my soul. Sometimes I cry (a lot - especially the first time). I noticed that this was the one one most therapeutic thing I have ever done, and my relationship with my husband was repaired almost instantly after the first time I did this. I'm still emotional, just not so depressed as I have initially been. I also noticed, certain people bring me down to the low depression state, so I am changing the frequency around these people, and interactions with them. And I am making for time for me... I noticed I just need a break more often than I'm getting sometimes. So going out with the girls tonight is exciting me right now... And hanging out with family as much as possible (parents/siblings... for some reason brings me so much joy). I hope this helps someone as much as it helped me. (Diet might be a reason I am like this also, but I just don't care enough about diet this pregnancy for some reason)

Jenn - posted on 02/06/2013

10

0

1

Im going thru alot of anxiety and post partum for over a year now. Hesitant on starting cipralex my dr prescribed me. Your not alone.. Im at the point where im scared to leave my house for np reason. Ive tried every natural way to fix it but just doesnt seem to be woking. But i do know people who have tried yoga and it helps. :) u can msg me if u want im still struggling thru this harder than ever.

Jessica - posted on 02/05/2013

2

0

0

try meditation it works realy well. You can go on youtube! Trust me I have 3 girls I went through it. Realy works. Put your mind at ease and makes you feel better, like if you can do anything in the world as long as you have your mind and heart in it,

Rachel - posted on 02/05/2013

46

6

3

I know the feeling. I had the postpartum depression kick in when my daughter was probably around 6 months old. I just thought I was in a bit of a funk at first, then I started feeling really down on myself, then it got to the point where I couldn't even see why my husband was with me. It was a downward spiral. He finally made me see that I needed to do something about it, it wasn't going to fix itself. We decided that I had to have some time out of the house, away from the baby, doing something to make me feel useful again. I ended up going back to work on the weekends, when hubby would be home to watch our daughter. Going back to work may not be an option, but doing something that is JUST FOR YOU will probably help.

Being a mom is great, I love it. I am no longer working at all, as of May 2011, due to my husband's constantly changing schedule, but being out of the house, not having to take care of anyone but yourself for a couple hours could help. Go for a walk, meet with girl friends, take a class. If that doesn't help, talk to your doctor. Sometimes your hormones get thrown so far off base, you need meds to get back on track. If it turns out that medication is needed, don't feel like a failure because you aren't strong enough to solve your own problems. It is only temporary, and will help you be a better mom in the end. A happy mom, means happy babies.

Christine - posted on 02/05/2013

102

0

1

You definitely need to talk to a counselor that specializes in this. Where do you live? You can just search for counselors that specialize in postpartum mood disorders on the internet and you should be able to find someone easily.

Jeanette - posted on 02/03/2013

5

22

0

I'm going to tell you my story in hopes that it helps you feel better about your situation.

I had my daughter when my son was 17 months old. I was a SAHM and loved it, until my daughter came along. I felt such guilt that I wasn't able to give my son the same amount of time/attention I did before I had my daughter. I realized about 6 months after I had my daughter that something was really wrong, but I was always so against drugs that I tried to cure it myself. I jogged every day with the kids in the stroller, and although that had always worked for me in the past (I ran marathons pre-kids), runs weren't doing anything for my crazy moods.

I felt out of control with my emotions. I loved my kids so much and truly enjoyed spending every day with them as their primary care giver. Yet I took everything my husband, family and friends said so personally that I started to shut everyone out of my life. It seemed easier that way, unfortunately. I felt my friends failed me as I was the first of my friend group to have kids (at age 35 no less), yet none of my friends came around after I had my son. I thought it was going to be so totally different and I got very depressed and lonely after my daughter was born.

As a result of me not dealing with my PPD I have a brother and sister in law who won't even talk to me anymore, my mom suggested I am possibly insane and my husband basically has zero respect left for me.

I should be frank and let everyone know that my husband drinks...alot. Often I'd find myself needing his support in the middle of the night with the kids. If I'd finally break down and ask for help it would always end up in a fight, a drunk fight on his part. It often turning into yelling, aggressiveness and finally him pushing me down and shaking me so hard I had bruises on my arms for weeks. the worst part was, I was holding my son while this happened. We were both so scared! It happened once more after that...similar situation where I had to ask for help in the middle of the night from a drunk who basically assaulted me while I was holding our daughter.

After that I got on a mild anxiety drug (citalopram). It was a huge step for me to admit that I was not okay, and to admit that my home life was less than ideal. The fact that I went on drugs 'proved' to my mom that I was 'INSANE' and she started to conspire with my husband about when I go totally nuts, she would come for the kids, etc. They were doing all this behind my back simply because everyone in my family believes that if a person needs mental health drugs that must mean they are crazy and unfit to care for children.

The next time my husband tried to attack me (while holding my daughter, in the middle of the night again), I lashed out. I scratched, punched, and yelled so hard that he finally stopped. He had a bloody gash in his ear for a week and didn't go into the office. I finally defended myself! I called my doctor after that to tell him the meds weren't working, that now I WAS actually crazy and inflicted physical harm on someone (my husband). You know what he said? He said I was perfectly normal! He asked how I would have handled that in the past. In the past I would have cowered to his awfulness and would have been silent and in tears for days. This time, while on drugs, he told me that I actually reacted like a normal person would have!

My doctor suggested rehab for my husband, but he would never do that. The first step is admitting he has a problem, and that has yet to happen. In the meantime, I cherish the moments he's sober and a kind daddy. When he's not, I lock him out and try to make things as normal as possible for our kids.

After typing this I even see that I should leave him. But, how does one do that when they have two kids?

Alina - posted on 02/01/2013

129

13

27

I had a moderate case of PPD when I had my son. I was exhausted, sleep-deprived, and my husband had just lost his mother, so he was grieving that loss and wasn't there for me, which I understand. Honestly, I spent time in prayer and reading my Bible every day, which gave me great peace of mind, and then I admitted I had PPD to a friend of mine, along with my mom and sister. They were all sooo supportive! I was able to talk, cry and share, and slowly the cloud lifted. I also put my son in the stroller and started walking every day, just getting out the house. Exercise for me, a change of scenery, and my son would sleep or just lay in the stroller smiling his little baby smile. He was so content! I think you definitely need to get out of the house, but don't add to your stress trying to drive during heavy traffic times or when your kids are close to feeding times (learned that the hard way). Please continue to come on here and let us know how you're doing, or if you need to vent! We understand and will listen and give support without judgment.

Sheri - posted on 02/01/2013

77

30

1

I had it with my 35month old and now have a 3month old and think I might have it again as its just me with 3 kids 24/7 my oldest is 4 and my husband works away from home for months at a time. He will be home for 4 days in 2wks and I can't wait. I also can't talk to my mom about it because she didn't want to believe I had it with my son and basically told me to throw out the pills and not to take them. I am on St. John's wort now as my naturopath tested me in nov and my hormones were out of balance and it was the thing that tested that would work for me. I think it's harder on me because of my oldest because she fights everything I do especially bedtime and seems to just make big messes and not clean them up also they used to nap for 3 hours in the afternoon and my mom took them both off their naps not realizing that them napping was for my benefit more than theirs. So I don't even get to rest in the afternoon anymore like I used too.

Melynda - posted on 01/31/2013

95

0

1

I find that exercise helps me to get out of the funk. Get out and go for a walk. If u can enjoy some good old vitamin d from our friend the sun do it. Does wonders!

Patricia Ann - posted on 01/29/2013

121

0

32

Your so welcome we all are here to help,I know you will do great...

Jessica - posted on 01/29/2013

3

0

0

Thank you ladies, at first I use to think I was the only one in the world going through this, but I found that not to be true. It's just so hard to talk to anyone about this, to think they wouldn't understand. Just like my husband, who is there for me, but doesn't quit get it. It helps to talk to moms like you, that knows what it is like. It feels less stressful to let it out then to hold it in. I just need the room to breathe. Some days are good and most days are bad. But, I know I will overcome this and get the help I need. I use to be such a happy person. I love my son so much and I just hate feeling like this.

Patricia Ann - posted on 01/29/2013

121

0

32

yeah ive taken meds they do help but also getting into a group with other moms really helped me even just a parenting group there are moms you will be able to relate with and being in there company offers alot in and of its self I really enjoyed it and it helped so much...

Patricia Ann - posted on 01/29/2013

121

0

32

need some counciling it will help you and give you some coping skills,when you feel out of sorts and someone to talk to who will be able to offer you some help ..there are also groups for this with other moms with the same feeling so you can help eachother....

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms