are you a stay at home also dealing with a mental illness?

Maureen - posted on 02/08/2011

Oh also if you can possible arrange some time for yourself, to do something you enjoy, maybe even for a few hours a week and away from the kids. Especially something like an art class or something creative and new to learn, I think that can help a great deal.

Maureen - posted on 02/08/2011

Hi I understand how you feel. I have depression. I am taking meds. I have found that helps, even though I probably needed them much earlier in my life. Even so, I still struggle sometimes and realize I do have depression and it affects me. I think I do a fairly good job with loving my children but I am not perfect. I try to accept that I am not going to be perfect and do the best I can. I had a very abusive childhood myself and when I compare that to what my kids have, they are doing ok. They are not being abused, they are not being severely damaged as I was. I try to put my efforts into making them feel loved. I hope that helps.

Renee - posted on 02/08/2011

Tina- I know your pain as well. I feel the same way. I have been battling with depression for the last 15 years (I am only 30). After the birth of my 2nd child, who is 10mos old, my hormone levels have yet to come back to normal. So not only and I dealing with depression, but my hormones are still way out of whack. The doctors think I might have a tumor on my Pituitary, so I get to deal with that stress as well. I am currently in a very isolated life as well. I have no friends or family within 300 miles from where I live. My husband works 3rd shift and sleeps all day.

Carisa - posted on 02/08/2011

I was diagnosed with postpartum after my 2nd daughter was born (I'm pretty sure I actually had it with my first but didn't recognize it) I loved being with the baby (she slept ALL the time) but I wanted to take her and leave my husband and oldest daughter. I found I was yelling a lot more than I felt I should. I was put on welbutrin and it really helped me. Even if you don't want to take medication, it will help you to talk to someone. There are probably support groups in your area to help. You are not alone...even those Mom's who look like wonder moms don't enjoy every minute of it. I hope you can find some help so you can enjoy your girls more.

Jodie - posted on 02/08/2011

I'm a stay at home mom of two children (boy and girl) and I love them to death! I was diagnosed with a lack of serotonin and panick attacks, as well as anxiety attacks. At first it was out of control and very hard on my children but I know have it controlled with medication. My children are the best when it comes to this as well. When I run out of pills I go into withdrawal and its very bad. So my children always make sure that I have my prescription called in before I run out and they always make sure I take my pill in the morning!! I think maybe you should go see your family doctor and talk to him about it! I had to go see a therapist for a whole year before I got better and it helps! Good Luck!

Susanne - posted on 02/08/2011

Hi my name is susanne and I completely understand where you are coming from sometimes we can get so caught up in everyday life at least I do feel like you are alone and lost, I have 3 children 2 of them being babies they are my life. I just wish I had someone to talk to as well so if there is anything I can do to help please let me know .

Katherine - posted on 02/04/2011

yep i have depression, lots of reasons why but currently being pregnant and not taking my antidepression pills i find myslef finding happiness in other stuff. it was also a choice im not big on drugs ans didnt want to take any unless needed while pregnant. i have my good days and bad days. on my bad days i do things that make me happy and glad to have a wonderful life. even with the chaos that goes on in it. i dont allow it to control my life.

Melissa - posted on 02/04/2011

Nope not alone at all. I too am a SAHM of two girls (6 yrs and 8 mths). I have a wonderful fiance and am getting married in June, but with that being said somedays I just can't seem to get out of my slump.

I have battled dpression, anxiety and post tramautic stress on and off for years and it definetely effects my everday mood and energy levels. Oh forgot to mention I'm also Canadian and the whole winter thing is enough to drive me mad. so every year (about this time) I get cabin fever. Fun, fun, fun!!!

Good to know that I'm (we) are not alone, I think having someone to talk to who can truly understand is important. Please feel free to email if you want to talk more (this goes for all of you lovely ladies) melissa_daley@hotmail.ca.

Hope to hear from you soon!!

Nicole - posted on 02/04/2011

hey, just an idea.. what about making a private facebook group wtih regds to the girls on this chat and helping and supporting each other?

i have a group that i have been friends with for 4 years now. we met online at a site about women struggling to concieve.

get to know each other and share what is happening in your day to day lives. tell eachother your probs and think of ways to help eachother, advise and ideas xxx

Nicole - posted on 02/04/2011

hun, i dont have a mental illness (that i know of) and i struggle too! SAHM is not easy - its soul stretching, it sounds like you have been stretched out a bit thin lately.
drop the girls off at MIL /Moms and go to the gum for a few hours/ a little retail therepy on your own/ a walk on the beach - something that makes you feel good. perhaps its getting your hair done or a rose oil massage/facialxx

Laura - posted on 02/03/2011

hello there
IF I CAN RELATE TO ANYONE WHO HAS WRITTEN ANYTHING HERE....IT'S KIMBERLY'S REPLY...i wish i could have put my experience in these words. worth a read ladies. any way...here's my take on it, and i have tried to keep it simple.

i too have suffered many years with depression on and off and it certainly became very noticable after children. so.....presuming that you are eating properly and maybe taking things like vit D, vit B etc (unlike me, but intend to}
It , in my opinion , seem like your tablets are not of the correct strength to be as effective in the situation you find yourself in. Be brave, go back to your doctor, and ask for an increase....after you have described the way you have been feeling lately. Tell the doc of any thoughts of life not being worth it, and/or thoughts of harming one's self...(how ever small) should be included.

if you feel that you don't get the right support , conserning your tablets...from loved ones, then you may have to do it for yourself and ignore there conserns, many of us have negative views on medications that help depression and do not understand depression. Medecines and antidepressants have improved my outlook on life greatly....but it did take some courage, time and effort to sort them out with some therapy too. but it's worth it.

i believe many families,,,daughters especially move away from there families and don;t get the once 'old fashioned ' help with their children, as they once did. we can be very much on our own....feeling isolated.

I moved to Canada...and it's been real hard bringing up the children on ones own. my partner is wonderful...but we have no help other than ourselves and i think this has added to the stress and depression of trying to cope. some days felt like hell.....and the light at the end of the tunnel seemed none existant at times...but it doesn't have to be this way. it changed for me...by getting help. i now feel pretty normal...and it's this you should aim for...don't settle for less. meds saved me.

all the best with this
kindest regards
los

Priscilla - posted on 01/25/2009

I felt like this after I had my son. It was totally new to me the whole staying at home and having a new baby and living far from my mom and family. You are definitely not alone and if you do have a chance, get a little pampered...I felt so happy to be at least an hour away getting a mani/pedi or something. yoga helps too! never forget you are important too and you need to be priority in order to feel and have the energy to be a mommy..

Rebekah - posted on 01/25/2009

Kimberly, LOVE the pic lol! I am going Tuesday to meet with a local sliding scale facility as we do not have insurance. (sweet I know) I know Im looking at being medicated again but this time Im not going to be so resistant. I am also interested in natural therapy and have begun researching. Any more information would be appreciated! Im bound and determined to get thru this again.

Nadine - posted on 01/25/2009

Tina, you are not alone. I am a SAHM of two girls almost 5 and 7, the youngest has speech and language delays and is currently being assessed and the oldest has nonverbal learning disorder. My husband works nights and . . . my mother-in-law lives with me. I think i always suffered from depression but was able to take care of myself - that was before kids - since the mil situation things got worse and i had to seek help and am now on meds. I am a better mom without the panic attacks and the weight of a nervous breakdown bearing down upon me but still, i have no energy and feel alot of guilt because i too have such high expectations of myself. I do so much, for my husband, the kids, his mom, the household and never get any thanks . . . this when i would rather not even get out of bed. You are definitely not alone. And i appreciate you sharing your story so that I know I am not either.

Kimberly - posted on 01/23/2009

I feel your pain.  I suddenly realized this summer that it wasn't normal to be so exhausted.  It wasn't normal to be so overwhelmed.  I have my dream life.  I have a husband I adore and two grogeous babies I'd walk through fire for.  Yet I wasn't enjoying them and I was overwhelmed and crying and so exhausted.  I contacted my ND and asked if it was possible that I had post partum.  He said yes and sent me some stuff to help.  AND BOY HAS IT HELPED.  I'm not perfect yet.  I'm going to do some tests and pinpoint exactly what is wrong so that he can go after the exact problem but I'm already so much better.  And it was a simple fix so far.  I'm taking natural things.  B vitamins, stuff to support and clean my liver and stuff to help my body make more happy hormones!!!  I urge anyone that's feeling this way to seek help because it is there and you can get past it.  And I'm so incredibly proud of all of you for saying, "yes I feel this way" because I found myself so hesitant to say anything.  All I want to do is be a wonderful wife and the best momma my babies could ever want.  And I felt like a failure because I wasn't even reaching my ideals of a great momma.   We don't have to live this way, there is help.  I hope you all find it and live the fulfilling wonderful lives you deserve.  Blessings to you all!

Stacey - posted on 01/23/2009

I too am battling depression.I have been diagnosed for 13 yrs now and have done therapy and meds off and on during this time. It is a struggle, but I want to say that if you just started on meds and they aren't working try somthing else. I have recently found one that works for me with little side effects and i am able to handle things much better now. The other thing is to be sure to ask for help when you need it from friends family or spouses. I had to realize that I am not superhuman I am human we all make mistakes and we all need to get help once and a while. It still gets me down sometimes that I can't be happy like a "normal" person with out all of the outside help from meds, therapy, congnitive therapy ect., but I try to start each day with a new attitude and appreciate what I have in my life. that is not to say that it is easy, but I just try to do and be the best I can. That is all anyone can do!

Rebekah - posted on 01/20/2009

Ya'll are not alone. I too have depression, PTSD, severe social anxiety disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, agoraphobia, and long term low lying depression. Well let's see, I was abused in every way fathomable as a child, marriage an emotionally abusive man and stayed with him until 5years ago. He abandoned his 2 kids. 4 of my family members were murdered in Florida on my daughters 9th birthday/thanksgiving day 05, my ex tried to kidnap my kids that Christmas, I found out I was pregnant in Jan of 06. My dad has been in and out of the hospital with strokes and heart conditions. Can I quite now? I want to give up on a daily basis. I thought things were leveling out and my stupid self agreed to try Chantix to stop smoking. Yeah great now Im bakc on that rollercoaster. Oh and I graduate with a BA in Psychology in May. Yeah I know how ya'll feel. There are days when Im able to keep up with the day to day 'chores' and then other days I just want to stay in bed buried under the covers. Its very frustrating. I know depression and some of the others are genetic and I am so scared for my kids. Living like this isn't how it has to be. Ive tried every med on the market to no avail.

Hollie - posted on 01/19/2009

hey i have 3 children at home with me, 8 yr old daughter, 4 and half old adhd speech impaired , behavior disorder global development delay (at a 2 1/2 - 3 yr old level) lil boy and a 5 month old lil girl, i myself have bipolar mania disorder, which is a chemical inbalance in my brain, my moods change drastically without warning, depression is a major side effect, evryday stuff seems like a nervous break down for me some days and other days i feel invinvible like im as best as ill ever be, until i black out and destroy the house abuse hubby etc, am slowly learning triggers etc to b able to calm myself before i get out of hand, constantly have to tel myself im a good mother and im not a failure.

being positive is the only thing i can do some days or try to focus on the kids and enjoying them cuddling them etc i love my kids oh so much and want to be the best mum ever for them, thats wat they deserve. my babies r very spoiled they have evry thing they could want nd need just about haha . thanks heaps felt gr8 to vent , im so pleased im not alone in these feelings and up and down days....

Tamara - posted on 01/19/2009

You're not alone. I'm a SAHM battling depression, PTSD, and ADHD. It's hard, it sucks, but I make it through by taking things one minute, one hour, one day at a time.

Dennah - posted on 01/17/2009

I actually am battling severe depression and I am on meds and none of them seem to work...I am now going into a partial hospitalization program starting the 2nd. Trust me you are not alone and I feel horrible every single day. I have lost all my friends and it's hard to make new friends because I don't know where to start and I want to make friends with other mommies so I can include my babies.

Kristina - posted on 01/16/2009

I am 32 with my first son who is almost 7 months and I have been diagnosed with bipolar disease and extreme anxiety. If I don't have my medication then I can't get through the day. I want my son to have the best mom but I feel worthless. You are not alone and it feels good to know I'mnot alone.

Andrea - posted on 01/16/2009

Hello ladies, I too am a stay at home mom battling depression.  I live in Winnipeg, MB (Canada) and have 3 children.  I too am very hard on myself and find it hard to be the mom I should be.  The key word there was "should",, that is a dangerous word and can lead to many disappointments.  Instead be the mother that you CAN be.  Eat healthy, get exercise and take some time for yourself!!  We're in this together!

Stephanie - posted on 01/16/2009

Depressed in Michigan! I have 3 children and have battling depression for many years. I have been through therapy and many medications. I have recently begun to spend some time on myself, taking time to put on make up and dress nicely. Also I have started taking 1 day a week for myself, it's been fabulous. I think taking time out to address our own needs is a must.

Hanna - posted on 01/16/2009

Hey!!

My name is Hanna & im 21yrs old, i am a stay at home mom & live in florida originally from England & i have a wonderful husband & a beautiful 1yr old boy.. i was so happy to see that im not the only one out there that suffers from this great thing that they call Depression.. I realized i had depression when i was freaking out over the stupidest things & just not being able to cope with everyday life, i just cant seem to pull myself together.. i was put on meds probably the end of october beginning of November & i just feel like they dont seem to be doing the job they should & i cannot cope with anything these days & i DO NOT want to be like this anymore!! i want to be the best for my son & my husband but unfortuantly the way i feel has been rubbing off on my son & is now reflecting everything he does! i have a great support system from my family & fortuantly my mother can relate to this depression because she has been through this before herself but all the advice & suggestions really doesnt help at all..

Any suggestions from u lovely ladies that suffer with this?? maybe we can atleast try & help eachother...

Jessica - posted on 01/15/2009

Hi there.  My name is Jessica and I live in a cold, small, boring town in Northern Minnesota and I can relate to being a mom and battling depression.  I've been to several different therapists, tried a few different medications, but now I'm pregnant with my second and due in only a few weeks so I haven't been on any meds.  I Have a 7 year old son and a wonderful fiance', but I can't ever seem to snap out of it.  After I have this baby (a girl), I hope to get back into therapy and back on meds but it's never a guarantee that it'll ork.  I never want to go anywhere, never want to talk to anyone, heck I don't even want to get out of my sweats!  Having it be winter here makes it harder because who wants to go play outside or go anywhere for that matter when it's 20 below?  I hope we can help each other, because you are definetely not alone..........