Baby to sleep on her own.

Leeza - posted on 01/29/2009 ( 9 moms have responded )

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My baby is 3 months old. I want my baby to be able to sleep by her own. I tried to put her down and let her fall asleep but she won't sleep. I need to hold her in my arms, rock her and sing her songs only then i can put her down after she's deep in her sleep. what to do? help me!

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Nikki - posted on 01/31/2009

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Hi



I have 4 children and I have followed a strict routine with all of them. Which at 3 months would consist of 2 daytime naps and bed time at 7pm. This has worked for me. And although restricting in some aspects has allowed me the freedom to know that at a certain time in the day what they are going to do and for how long. It does take training though and that it hard, but the rewards are great. My 1 yr old has gone down for her 2 and a half hour nap at lunch time since she was 3 weeks old with no problems.



If you want a routine then you have to go through the training to reap the rewards. If you prefer a more relaxed approach then that is fine too. I guess it's just up to you in how you want to run with it.



Hope that helps!

[deleted account]

I agree with all the other mom's advice.  My 15 month old slept in his bassinet and eventually his crib in our room until he was about 6 months old.  Once I put him into his own room, I knew I wanted him to be able to fall asleep on his own  but I was appalled at the thought of letting him cry it out.  The method I used was harder on me I think than it was on him.  When babies that age cry, MOST of the time, there is nothing "wrong" with them.  So here's what I did and it worked.  After making sure he was full and had a clean diaper, I would sing to him a little and then mommy and daddy would give him kisses g'nite and I would lay him in his crib awake.  If he started crying, I would wait 1 minute (this was VERY HARD TO DO THE FIRST FEW TIMES) and then I would go in, rub his back, squeeze his glo worm so the light and music would start and I'd only say "sshhhhhhh".  Keep the light off or low.  Then leave the room.  Next time he cries, let him go for 2 minutes (even harder than one minute lol).  Then do the same routine.  I would do this all the way up to 4 minutes because that's all I could stand to hear him cry but after about 2 or 3 days of it, he started falling asleep on his own with no problems.  Sometimes, he didn't necessarily fall asleep right away, he would lay in there and make baby noises (this is the self soothing part) but eventually he would fall asleep just fine.  Babies need to learn how to self soothe and while I agree that this time is short and rocking them to sleep is nice, we aren't doing them any favors by not at least trying to teach them how to do it on their own.  After all, I don't know about you, but I don't want to have a 5 or 7 or 9 year old that I have to rock to sleep lol! 



Now, I have to admit that I do miss the days when my son would fall asleep on me.  Those are sweet moments I treasure.  In fact, he was exhausted after a long car ride the other night and fell asleep on me shortly after we got home and I cried it was so sweet.  I don't see anything wrong with the occasional moment like that.  It makes you appreciate them more.  But it is so nice to not have to rock him to sleep every time anymore.  It's nice having a bedtime routine, putting him to bed and letting him fall asleep on his own.  Also, at least with my son, I noticed that once I let him fall asleep on his own, he started sleeping through the night more often.  Hope this helps and good luck, no matter which method you choose!  They are all good suggestions!

Crystal - posted on 01/30/2009

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You should not let any infant under the age of 6 months cio. They cry for a reason, why not just enjoy rocking your baby to sleep at this age? It won't last forever and it's great bonding time.

You should look into Dr. Sears no cry sleep method.

Ashley - posted on 01/30/2009

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i agree with everyone here but something else you could try is to record your voice singing and put it on for her when you put her down,

Jill - posted on 01/30/2009

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I totally agree with everyone. It isn't easy, but babies need to be taught how to fall asleep on their own. A great book to look at is "Solve your Child's Sleep Problems" by Dr. Ferber. While the book covers a lot of issues, I found the gentler approach to "crying it out" explained in his book to work OK for me when my baby was smaller.



Here is the method in a nutshell: put your baby down sleepy but awake. If she cries, wait 3 minutes then go in and reassure her (don't pick her up, and only spend a max of 2 min in there). Reset your watch for 5 minutes. Go in again. Then 10 wait minutes. You get the idea, I'm sure. The next day increase the wait time before you go in. Borrow or buy the book if this sounds like something you'd feel comfortable doing. Good luck!

Gena - posted on 01/30/2009

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Try and do your same routine, but just before she falls asleep (eyes half closed), put her down and walk away....if she is good and tired, even if she cries, usually it wont be too long.

Kathy - posted on 01/29/2009

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Establish a bedtime routine. Ours was change the diaper, feed and rock and lay down in the crib half asleep. I wouldn't talk during this time as it's stimulation and keep the lights low. Don't be afraid to let her cry.

Keep the routine consistent. Whatever you choose to do, that is the most essential.

Good luck!

Jackie - posted on 01/29/2009

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I have to agree. It is the hardest thing to do but somethimes you just have to let them cry and learn to self sooth. I had to do this with my son and it was hard and very frustrating but we stuck to a strict bed time and made sure eveything was dark when we fed him before laying him down, and turning on his music aquarium, and it was with in a couple of day he had no problem with falling asleep on his own. One thing that did help me cope with letting him cry it out was that I set a rule that if he didnt' quiet down with in 20 min. then I could go in and comfort him.

Barb - posted on 01/29/2009

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I know you don't want ot hear this, but leave her in her crib. If she is tired, she'll go to sleep. It is sooo hard to let them cry (if she does this), but she WILL fall asleep. After a few days, she won't cry as long. I have 3 kids, and couldn't stand for them to be in our bed. And you don't really sleep well, because your afraid someone might roll over on them, or they'll fall out of bed, etc. Just try to be patient, keep her on a routine of naps, and same bedtime every night, and it'll all work out. By the way, she's ADORABLE!

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