Being naked in front of kids.

Lisa-Marie - posted on 05/27/2010 ( 134 moms have responded )

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I was shocked when a friend told me how embarressed she was when her 2 year old walk in on her having a shower - because she was naked.

I have never thought twice about being naked infront of my kids and both my hubby and I shower with them and have never covered up infront of them. My four year old has asked me why boys have a different wee wee to girls and why mummy has bobbies and daddy doesn't (which of cause I explained that mummy has bobbies to store milk for babies)

I think it is fine and healthy for him to ask questions and get answers and not feel uncomfortable or embarressed about his body. It has also been easier to explain about inappropriate touching.



Just wondering what other mums and dads do - do you cover up and not allow your children to see you naked or like us do you just not feel the need to do that?

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[deleted account]

My husband and I have no problems being nude in front of our boys (3 & 18 mos). They still have showers with either daddy or me, in fact our eldest takes the longest shower of all if he can get us to take a shower right after each other so he doesn't have to get out. lol

I think it only becomes a problem when you make it one. If nudity is no big deal to you, then it's no big deal to the child. I was raised showering with a parent until probably about age 6 or 7, because a shower was a treat for me. I also remember bathing with my cousins (boys) when I was 7 and we weren't interested in each others bits because we were too busy playing. Not only that, but we already knew about the different bits and just didn't care. However, I know that my Japanese upbringing is different to others and would probably be considered more liberal having been spattered with visits to the hot springs and public bath houses. My parents were very open about answering ANY question I asked and that's exactly how we want to raise our boys. I was never overly curious about sex as a teenager because I already had the information... and didn't want to be a teen pregnancy statistic. I wanted more out of life.

Locking yourself away simply because you're 'as God made you' would actually teach a child to be ashamed of their body, because there must be something wrong if you've locked yourself from view. It must be bad. Keeping your child from seeing your body because they might ask questions won't stop them from having the questions, it will just leave a huge question mark there for someone else to answer. If you go about your normal business of bathing and dressing, without drawing attention to the fact that you're nude (because it's no big deal) will teach your child that nudity isn't anything special or 'adults only'.

Take a moment to look at it through a child's eyes. Why is she running into the bedroom and closing the door to get dressed? I wonder what she's hiding? Why can't I see? It must be something bad, or else she would show me. I wonder what it is and what it looks like. -- Can you see how the curiosity would spiral? Who's going to answer the questions that will never get asked? My husband and I want to be the people who get asked the questions about the human body, sex and the like.

As it is my 3 yr old has already pointed and told me that my 'boobies' are for his brother to have a drink (I breastfed) but his aren't, and the 18 mon old has pointed to his dad's penis and then looked down and pointed to his own, so he's obviously become aware they have the same bits. I couldn't help but laugh each time.

Rebekah - posted on 06/02/2010

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When my son was little I didn't mind changing in front of him but i think at about 3 years old that they should not be around the opposite sex adult changing.
My daughter is 3 and I still change in front of her but I do not make it a habit.
But at a certain point it has to be kept more modest I believe.

Selina - posted on 06/02/2010

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I have just talked to my 10 yr old daughter about my reply on here and she says she has never felt embarrassed about seeing us naked... I did forget to mention that where we live I and many women are on the beach with only their bikini bottoms or a small thong on so seeing bodies is not anything new to anyone ...... I don't think it has anything to do with the way teenagers are...I don't walk around the streets showing all my body... I don't agree with us covering up our bodies in our own home and I definatley don't think that it has anything to do with sexuality, it's natural....
I understand if you're religious and it's your belief but I don't believe that we will cause problems in her life with porn or homosexuality..... as I don't believe that has anything to do with seeing your mother and father doing a natural thing as having a shower or waking up in bed.....I also don't believe in locked doors only our front door has a lock....
But this is only my opinion....

Mary - posted on 06/02/2010

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My daughter has seen me in my undies and my bra but I don't let her see me completely naked. When I take a shower I go in the bathroom and shut and lock the door before I get all undressed and get in. I don't like her to see me naked. The Bible talks about the fact that we are not to look on the nakedness of our parents. Also, whenever my hubby is getting dressed or undressed he goes into our bedroom and shuts and locks the door so she can't get in. I believe you should be careful about letting your kids see you naked because for one thing you don't know when they are going to develop sexually, as each child develops at a different rate and this may cause problems later on in their lives like with porn or with homosexuality etc. Also, it helps to teach them modesty for their bodies. Too many teenagers today are going around showing everything they've got. Holes in their jeans which show off their buts and low cut tops that show their breasts and short skirts which show their private parts and extremely short shorts which make you wonder if they even have any pants on at all cause all you can see is the top they have on and no shorts they're that short and tight too. This will help teach them that they should not go around showing off their bodies to everyone like that.

Ameriah - posted on 06/02/2010

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Since I have girls, I usually don't feel the need to be as strict about covering up. But my husband is very strict about it and I encourage and even insist on it, but a lot of that may come from my background of sexual abuse. I have read several time that children don't remember things when they are 3 or younger, but as they get a little older, I believe in teaching them some modesty.

Selina - posted on 06/02/2010

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Our daughter is now 10 yrs old and sees both my husband and I naked every day I think... usually when we get up in the morning... or on weekends when she comes into our room in the mornings..
She has showers with either my husband or I sometimes when we come home from being on the beach, we do have a large walk in shower.. It doesn't really bother her as it is just normal for her.
My parents were the same with me all my life. I don't think there's a problem at all.
I think it is up to the family with what you feel comfortable with.
We live in Tenerife, Spain where it is very family orientated.
I think the UK has gone overboard on the issues with children and I think some times that can do the opposite to protecting them and instead of making them loving,stable children it is making them scared of anything and everyone.
At the end of the day it is your family and you should do as you all feel comfortable....if ever my daughter says that she feels uncomfortable or embarrassed then I'm sure my husband or I would cover up.. but I can't see that happening in our house..

Belle - posted on 06/02/2010

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my 4 year old daughter has seen us naked since she was little and she doesnt take any notice now. However our eleven year old boy, who saw us naked when he was little, we now make sure we have knickers on as he finds it embarrassing. I think it depends on the child and the different ages and how you approach it.

Candace - posted on 06/02/2010

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I really dont think its a big deal. I shower and bath with my 13 month old son but I would understand if he was like 7 years old or something. lol

[deleted account]

I grew up with my parents naked all the time. Never perverted. My dad took baths with me till I was like 5 (after a certain age he wore underwear) however to this day (I'm 20) my mom still walks around naked in front of me. I'm not offended of it and I'll walk around naked in front of my son till I feel the time is right. No big till someone makes it a big.

Krystal - posted on 06/01/2010

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I think it is fine when the child is a baby, But once they get to that asking age I think boys should have daddy explian and the girls have mommy. If its the other way around sometimes the child will talk about it in school because they don't know any better and some of the children make it clear that they know that girls and boys have different parts to the class. That I think is wrong because not every parent wants there child to learn that at such a young age. I have heard 7 yr olds bragging about how they know that girl and boys have different parts and that how they have sex which I don't think young children need to know that because thats why are teen pregnacy rate is so high. Children find out about this stuff way to soon. So if it is descussed I just think the parents should make it clear for the child not to go around saying stuff.

Jasmine - posted on 06/01/2010

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it really is inappropriate and unnecessary young or old. Its no different than co sleeping, there should be privacy. I mean some people may find it helpful when potty training, and that is understandable but showering with your kids and walking around the house naked? smh most likely they wont remember afterawhile anyway. Me personally, I'm against being naked around my son or anyone for that matter but if it works for you...

Tamara - posted on 06/01/2010

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there comes a point that it's inappropriate but when their this little it's really a non issue.

Vixi - posted on 06/01/2010

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Personally I think once it becomes an issue for you then it's time to think about it.

My daughter's 16 months and I change infront of her, Ive never bathed with her because I have Cerebral Palsy and getting in/out the bath just by myself is hard enough let alone with a lil 1.

Different parents have different views on this type of thing and I basically think it is up to you as a parent how you address the whole situation xx

Lexi - posted on 06/01/2010

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It sounds like your son will have a healthy body image and view of things. I don't think there is anything wrong with being naked in front of young children. Right now my son is ten months old and we still enjoy lots of skin to skin cuddles. My husband and I take baths with him. So much easier and more fun than bending over the tub to bath him! Just like any ten month old, everything is being explored. He has grabbed at my pubic hair (and found out that makes mommy yelp! LOL) he's grabbed my nipples, he checks out daddy's armpit hair and he's touched his penis to see what that is. There is nothing gross or sexual about it. He's just learning. We tell him what the body part is and what it does. My husband was rolling on the floor laughing after he heard me yelp from the other room and walked into the bathroom to hear me telling our son "that's where pee pee and babies come out". lol I don't think our bodies are anything to be ashamed of. I really think so many problems stem from that. When my son was two weeks old I yelled at my husband because there was still poop on torstens penis after he changed him. But then he told me why. He has had, "our bodies are bad" and "any nudity is sexual" so drilled into his head by our society that he thought it was wrong to touch a baby's privates. He had only been doing a quick swipe on T's bum and then putting the new diaper back on really quick so that no one would think he was doing anything inappropriate. I had to explain to him that we have to get them clean and it's not inappropriate. I had to show him how to check and clean the foreskin and slather diaper cream all over and kiss that cute squishy little baby butt!! As Torsten gets older, I'll just take things as they come. I suppose about the time he starts learning it's not ok to be naked in public, I will need to start keeping at least a full coverage bra and underwear on around my son. Probably around 5 but it will all really depend on him. If me being naked seems to make him uncomfortable sooner I'll put clothes on, if it doesn't phase him at all yet, I wont worry about it. I think it's ok for dads to be naked in front of their boys and moms to be naked in front of their daughters indefinitely. My mom and I still change clothes in front of each other.

Tereza - posted on 06/01/2010

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hi i dont cover up in front of my son he is only 6 months old though and i breast fed him but i do get changed in front of him we both do

Mallory - posted on 06/01/2010

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absolutely nothing wrong, but i do think at a point you should stop. kids get curious, and want to know more.

Tamara - posted on 06/01/2010

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I think when someone feels uncomfortable with it. And I think that it should said calmly and understandingly if its the parent who feels uncomfortable with it. With each of the kids it was different ages. The body is a natural thing and they need to know this and know that its nothing to be ashamed of.

Analiese - posted on 06/01/2010

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My husband and I also did the same...we used to shower with our son and daughter...my view is as for my son (4 yrs) he now is too old to see mommy naked...he knows what all the body parts are and has seen them b4 now I am trying to teach him its bad to see other people naked... as for walking in on my husband we dont make a huge fuss over but we still tell him to leave the room for that purpose. Our daughter she is only 2 she sees me undress all the time and takes a shower with me from time to time as well...we did stop allowing her to see her daddy naked b/c she tried to touch his wee wee the last time ("daddy whats that?")...so we knew it was time to not let her see him anymore b/c she was too curious. I dont feel our children need to see us naked to be taught about bad touching. From when my kids were born I always told them while changing their diapers that no one is allowed to touch their private parts and they dont touch anyone elses...and its regularly told to them. So basicly it all depends on the age of your children I feel.

PATRICIA - posted on 06/01/2010

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I dont see a big at all! and I think when you make a big deal about it is when they start to second guess their sexuality and makes them feel uncomfortable in their own skin! I think there is a age when you should start changing in separate rooms and usually your child will let you know when that is. My girlfriends and I have had this conversation lots and all agree that it is better not to make a fuss about being naked in front of your bebes!

Imee - posted on 06/01/2010

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I totally agree with you Christina Deasty. I have three girls and they've never seen me naked and definitely NOT my husband. I've always taught that although not to be ashamed of their bodies, they need to make sure they protect their bodies and we start at home. I guess when kids are little it's no big deal, but like some people say, if a child start talking about he/she sees their parents naked and they're okay being naked together, others will take that in another content. Especially with everything going on in this world of ours. I guess my reasoning behind covering up was I wanted them to do same thing and not be walking around naked freely. I always had the fear that if they were so open at home, who's to say they wouldn't walk around or not cover up when they're at someone elses house. I am just overly protective of my girls that way and always had been. They're are too many sickos out there so I started teaching them to protect their bodies at early ages.

Bridget - posted on 06/01/2010

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I feel the same way. I think as long as you are comfortable answering questions in an age appropriate manner and explain not to touch . I am more comfortable than my husband is, but that is his choice. He is not as uncomfortable with the same sex child. The girls are a bit to curious and it embarraces him that they stare. Don't blame him for that. I grew up with my mom and she was always very unconcerned about being naked in front of us kids. I feel it is best to use your judgement when it comes to an opposite sex child as to how long it is appropriate to be naked around them.

Cristina - posted on 06/01/2010

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My son is two and if I have no time to give him his own bath I take him in with me and kill 2 birds with one stone, he points and says mommy no wee wee? ti witch I respond: no only boys have wee wees, he laughs and we continue to bathe, I think he likes the fact that mom is with him sharing his bath time, now, when he's older about 3 or 4 I'm afraid that I will cover at least my bottom, kids now a day are more advanced than a while back.
So for a baby or toddler I don't see it to be a big deal, plus it's nothing to be ashamed of we all have the same parts.

Katharine - posted on 06/01/2010

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We have kids ranging from 13years to 2months so I think it all depends on the age. We would NEVER be naked in front of our 13 year old...and we are starting to be more modest around our 6 and 8 year old...but the babies ...does it really matter? You have to be smart about it...we still sometimes shower with our 6 year old..but that is getting rarer...and our 8 year old is also becoming more modest about her body. They all know about the different body parts and answer any questions they have honestly and as scientifically/politically correct as possible.

Destinee - posted on 06/01/2010

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i was wonder about this same question and im glad to find that someone asked and there were so many great responses!

Sarah - posted on 06/01/2010

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I think the way my parents handled it was good... neither of them were shy in front of me until one day I asked mommy why daddy had a tail! lol. I think about the time that kids start noticing and commenting on things is about the time, for the parents' sake, to start covering up. At least the parent of the opposite sex. Kids love to talk, and I wouldn't want mine telling strangers about my private areas! :)

Rebecca - posted on 06/01/2010

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Never thought twice about it with my son until he turned 4; After I had answered his basic questions about body differences I told him that it's good to have privacy and stopped being quite as free about it as I had been. Sometimes he still sees me at "naked moments" but I don't make a big deal out of it. He's allowed to come into the bathroom with me but he turns and faces away from me and I do the same for him. It's not so that he will be ashamed or self conscious or anything like that, but it is preparing him for the future and teaching him about respect and privacy..... and also teaching modesty helps him understand about how our bodies are private and not to be seen or touched by just anyone. That way he knows that it's not ok for Mr./Mrs. Stranger to come along and mess with him.

Adele - posted on 06/01/2010

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i dont thinnk there is anything wrong with being naked infront of your children!! i have a 2 month old son and me and my partner are always walking about the house naked!! he is alot more reserved than i am, he doesnt like to be totally naked knowing there is some one eles int he house as i dont care!! and i hope that when my son is older he will be like me!! it is totally natrual to be naked! we are not born with nickers or boxers on are we lol.x

Marie - posted on 06/01/2010

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Hey, my 4 yo daughter likes to be comfortable in her home my nieces and oldest daughter think it's inappropriate, I don't mind that my child will not be ashamed of her body, I was and am and that's just wrong.

Tara Lee - posted on 06/01/2010

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I have no problem being naked around my daughter...she's 21months, I shower, dress and walk around (to get something like clothes from the dryer, ect) in front of her and think nothing of it...my husband will take a bath with her, but ever since she turned about one, he makes a point to hide his private, he'll dress in front of her, but casually be turned away so she wont see "it". I have no thoughts to stop, but then again she's a girl and I'm not shy AT ALL in front of any girl/woman. As I'm PG again, I'll be courious to see if I feel the same way if I have a boy...lol
When I asked my husband why he 'hides', he had 2 reasons...1. "his little girl didn't need to see that, EVER!!"..lol...2. here in Canada, child services would be all over us if something she said was taken tha wrong way..this I understand

Amy - posted on 06/01/2010

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being naked isn't a issue in my home, my son (3 years old) actually asks more questions about his daddys body than mine as he is usually in the bath with me and very rarely with his dad. wen my daughter came along (8 weeks) my son has helped me change her and bath her and he hasn't once asked why she is different to him..... im breast feeding my daughter and i was in the bath with him and he just came out with 'mmm boobies yummy, babys eat boobies' i couldn't stop laughing!!

Jami - posted on 06/01/2010

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my boys (almost 4 and 5) always want to touch...it does make me uncomfortable. I don't parade naked around them but I try not to make a big deal out of it when they see and a firm "no" usually does get them to stop asking to touch me.

Jamie - posted on 05/31/2010

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honestly my son was 7 or 8 yrs old before he quit running around the house naked my girls were 6/7 as for myself I quit leaving the bedroom or bathroom naked when I didn't know if there were any of my kids' friends in the house and hubby he still goes from bathroom to bedroom naked and our son is 18 now. As for privacy to this day if i'm in the shower and my son wants to brush his teeth etc. he will knock and walk in I'm behind a curtain no biggy.Same goes for myself I refuse to go down stairs to the "BOYs" bathroom so if I gotta go and some one is in the shower/ tub I knock and walk in.
I used to shower with my grandson when he was an infant and toddler but I wore panties, b/c he is not my child.

Alicia - posted on 05/31/2010

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Hmmm. Thats a tough one, because there are so many things it depends on.

I would say that it depends on their age, and how often they ask questions. I've raised 8 kids. My youngest kids right now are 2, 5, and a newborn. They are all boys. I'm alot more reserved around my 5 year old son. My two year old showers with me, because he doesn't like getting his hair wet, and when they're around daddy, it doesnt matter much, because they're all guys.

However, my room is my room, and it is the only room that is offlimits without permission to my kids. That's my space, and they all have their own rooms. So, I don't really run into this situation alot anymore.

Chelle - posted on 05/31/2010

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Our little man is 19 months old and has seen both of his parents naked a number of times. Like others on here i dont want to send him the message that your body is something to be ashamed about. However as a different sexed parent i will be more mindful of him seeing me this way when he gets older. He sees his dad like that cos he showers with him. Me he only sees bits.

Michelle - posted on 05/31/2010

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Hi i have the same opinion as you neither my husband or i have ever made a big deal about nudity in the house my kids are all older now and as they grow up the naturally begin to be more private and get uncomfortable around us oldies being naked and censure the situation themselves, your instincts will tell you what age that becomes appropriate at. I can tell you though all 3 of my kids talk to me openly about any questions or problems with there bodies because they know there is nothing to be embarrassed about and i have teenage boys lol. good luck go with your instincts you know your own kids. some one gave me a great piece of advice when i had the same kind of problem she said you can tell how much a child needs to know by the questions they ask so when there young keep the answers simple and then your laying the ground work for when there older.

Kristen - posted on 05/31/2010

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Hi Lisa-Marie,

I have a 3 year old Daughter who has seen me naked, I do not think twice about it! Also every time I try and take a bath she runs in to join me, she thinks my bath time is hers. It doesn't bother me at all for her to see me naked. My Husband doesn't like anybody to see him in his underwear (much less naked) so with him it is a different story :). I honestly do not feel the need to cover up because in my rationale it would make them insecure about their own bodies. Just teach them when it is and is not appropriate to be naked and it will all be fine!

Kristin - posted on 05/31/2010

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Both of our boys have seen me and my husband naked. They are both aware that there is anew baby on the way and have a good general knowledge of anatomy. It's nuts to keep them completely in the dark until puberty as then we get to combat all the stupid, misinformation they've gotten from their friends.

We are working on teaching what privacy means to our oldest though. Not everyone wants a 5 year old bombing in to pee while they are taking a shower. Can't do that with a potty training 2-3 year old though. And, what parent's don't want a little private, adult time? So knocking and privacy are important too.

Melysa - posted on 05/31/2010

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what is the big deal with seeing each other nude my mother still has no issues with getting dressed in front of me and my brother she covers up in front of my husband most of the time but even he has seen her walk past with a little more showing then he would have liked my m-i-l has even gotten changed in front of me and my girls every girl in the world has the same parts its nothing gross they will not be scarred for life just because they saw some boobs because newsflash people they don't see your body parts they see their mum it only becomes an issue if you make it one they wouldn't remember if you had clothes on or not

Marcia - posted on 05/31/2010

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My son is 4 and I feel uncomfortable being naked around him. Up until last summer I took a shower with him, but not anymore. My husband covers up too. Meh, just us I guess.

Christina - posted on 05/31/2010

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Personally I cover up in front of my Son. I want to teach him privacy. When he gets older I will explain things to him. I do the same when using the toilet. I think it's important for him to learn early that if Mommy is in the Bathroom and the door is closed, then that means that he does not come it. There will be lots of time for teaching about the birds and the bees, but for me I don't think it's appropriate, especially for children of the opposite sex. That's just my opinion.

Tiffany - posted on 05/31/2010

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i think that when they reach a certain age then yes, it does become inappropriate for parents to be naked in front of their kids. especially the opposite sex parent.

Jovan - posted on 05/31/2010

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Well my son has not seen me nude sece befor he started school and my daughter will not be seeing her dad nude anymore befor she is in school. I know what you are saying you really have to stres to you kids though its not a big deel to see mom or dad BUT to make sure no one elts dose and how you could get in truble if they see you naked after a serten age. My son asked me about 6 months ago why we dont shower together anymore but his sister dose and I told him cus you are too old now and you should not see mommy nude anymore.

Jovan - posted on 05/31/2010

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You are right. I dont think anyone outside the family should see your child nude after 1year old. Some peaple you just dont know what they are thinking.

Jovan - posted on 05/31/2010

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Depending on the age of the child oposit sex. My 3 year old daughter sees both me and her dad nude. My son who is 7 has not seen me nude in about 3 years he was looking way to much and we have alredy been through all the questions so he new what boobs were for and all that. So he dose not see me no mre but it is ok for him to see his dad for how ever old my son is when he is not comfortable. My daughter will stop seeing her Dad when he thinks she needt to stop and he thinks she is done asking questions. But NO if you make it a big deal to your kids they will think its a big deal. ITS NOT.

[deleted account]

I noticed a lot of people have no problem with being naked around their younger kids boys or girls and them it seems to take a natural progression to more covering up as they get older. I think this is great we re teaching them not to be all weird about their bodies but at the same time teaching them rules of society. I mean its really cute for a 1 year old to run around naked but gets weird when an 8 year old runs around naked. Am I right???

Brandy - posted on 05/31/2010

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The issue for me isn't embarressment or shame. I know someone who used to shower and walk around naked in front of thier kids, but one of their kids mentioned seeing daddy's private parts at school. Child protective services was called in. There were meetings with the school and a whole lot of trouble. I hate to say it but in our communitys if u are accused of anything sexual with your children it leaves doubt innocent or guilty it doesn't matter. No charges were filed but the damage was done. I have heard people say they wont let their kids go to their house. I don't really have an opinion either way but I think you should be aware that their are people out there that will think the worst.

[deleted account]

My parents were pretty open with me as far as walking around naked, so that's what we've done with our kids. My oldest is 7, and she's starting to get 'modest' so I think it's time for us to start being a little bit more modest for her sake. I think kids need to understand there is a time & place to be naked, but that they should be brought up to appreciate the body and what all it can do.

Jana - posted on 05/31/2010

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When my son was younger it wasn't a big deal to me to be naked. He is 10 now and I stay covered up. My husband has no problem maybe because they are both dudes....I don't feel the need to offer up a naked female body for my son to stare and wonder about. He'll find out what he needs to know when it's appropriate.

[deleted account]

Never had a problem but now that our little girl is five asks a lot of question which we answer but i feel privacy is also something needed&should be thought.

Sasha-lynn - posted on 05/31/2010

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It is not a big deal what so ever. I shower with my daughter almost everyday and on occasion my hubby will shower with her. We have never once felt embarrassed. I don't find a problem with it.

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