Do you think you should let your baby cry it out at night?

Lexi - posted on 11/24/2008

I read Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth. Since my son (6-7 months old) had everything he needed (clean bum, full tummy, binkie), we knew he just wanted attention and let him cry it out. He goes down now with minimal fussing. My husband was really supportive. For some it works, for some it doesn't. Don't let anyone make you feel like a lousy mom. Do what works for you and your child.

Richelle - posted on 11/15/2008

My son is 16 1/2 months old and wakes up from time to time, I just let him cry it out if he cries for more than a few of minutes I know there is something going on. But I still let him cry it out most nights. Sometimes my son has nightmares but u can definitely tell those cries from just wanting to be up with mommy.

Janine - posted on 11/15/2008

I did and both of my babies slept through the night from 5 months on...from 8pm to 8am. They still sleep through the night at 1 and 2 years old respectively. It is hard to hear them cry. I would go in to reassure them. they only cried for 1 or 2 nights. Having said that you should only do what your comfortable with.

Kate - posted on 11/15/2008

i dont believe in it....i get a headache when i cry, so im sure my baby would. my 1yr old doesnt cry much,so im lucky,but when he does, i just think he needs a mummy cuddle....u need to do whats best for you and what u think is right...what ever makes you happy ur little man will be happy xxx good luck xxx

Keely - posted on 11/14/2008

I cant do it. When my son cries i immediantly go to him. For me its helped reassure him that no matter what mommy is hear and wont be far away. Sure there are sleepless nights but he knows that i am hear and that is important to me. Just remember that Doctors WILL NEVER EVER EVER know YOUR kids like YOU do . YOU DO WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU!!

Jennifer - posted on 11/14/2008

My husband and I hold our son to get him to sleep. Have since he was born. He is 11 months and for about 4 months he has been sleeping through the night. We moved his crib into his room at 6 months and at 7 months, he slept through the night, We did a combo of letting him cry and going to him. When he first cried out, we went to him and made sure he was dry, had his blankie and his paci. Now, unless he is sick, he only wakes up like once a month for a bottle! He goes to bed anywhere from 8 to 10 and sleeps till 6 or 7. We love the time of holding him to put him to sleep and this prevents the issue of him wanting to lay down with a bottle. He knows that he has that in the living room with Mommy and Daddy, then goes to sleep. Some nights, we do put him in his crib when he is so sleepy but is squirming. He naps 1 time a day for about 2 hours and is a wonderful baby!!

Gloria - posted on 11/13/2008

This comes down to what your parenting style is. I align myself with the attachment parenting style. I have not let either one of my children Cry it Out. I feel it puts a lack of trust between the parent and the child. Usually when a baby wakes, he just wants mommy. What is so bad about reassuring him that he is okay and put him back to sleep? Yes, you may lose sleep now, but it is so worth it.....it wont last forever.

I just do what feels right as a mom in my heart. I have also read some of Dr. Sears books. Hes books just supported me on what i had been doing.....



It just comes down on what you feel is the right thing to do and what your parenting style is.



Good Luck!

Julie - posted on 11/13/2008

We tried every book and also letting him cry it out. It never worked for us. He is now 3 and for the most part he goes to bed with no problem and sleeps through the night. I think every child is different and you have to figure out what works best for you and your child.

Diane - posted on 11/13/2008

I couldn't let my oldest cry it out. After about 5-10 minutes she would vomit she got so upset. I think you just have to do what is best for you and the baby.

Heather - posted on 11/12/2008

Do it in small steps. First night wait 5 min, then go in. Each night after that, keep increasing the time by 5 min each day. Good luck! It will be worth it!

Brandi - posted on 11/12/2008

I rock my baby boy to sleep every night. He is 7 months old and has been sleeping through the night since 11 weeks!!! I read the book Baby Wise and the promised that if you stuck to a strict feeding schedule your baby would sleep through the night by 12 weeks. It worked for me and I love rocking my baby to sleep it is always such a tender and sweet moment!

Melissa - posted on 11/12/2008

BOO, HISS! Doctor's opinions.

You need to do what's right for your child, EVENTUALLY your baby will sleep through the night, and actually it could be very soon since he's a year. I tired to let my kids cry it out and, well...it didn't work. But I am happy to report that the both sleep through the night!

Lori - posted on 11/12/2008

I think it is a personal preference in parenting style. I chose to let my children "cry it out"- early- once they showed they could sleep through the night- a few months old, that was it. I wanted to have an ease to bed time every night, so I also taught them at an early age to fall asleep on their own. We would have some cuddle time until they were drowsy, then to sleep in their own bed by themselves. I like knowing that my "job" is done when I put them to bed until the next morning. Of course, there are sick nights that once in awhile change that, but 99% of the time, they go to sleep on their own and sleep all night. If you enjoy spending time with your child in the middle of the night and you don't mind having to get up several times a night, then do that. But, if you want to sleep all night as well, just know that the first 2-3 nights are the worst. I would go in and comfort him but try not to pick him up or give in because then it starts the whole process over. Good luck!

Chris - posted on 11/12/2008

my son sleeps through the night...he is eleven. he is a great young man!!!! kind and loving and getting a bit goofy, but he is a neat child!!! i never let him cry himself to sleep. i was always there! i remebered when i was a kid and that i did not like the night, it was dark. i loved, loved, loved him!! i do not spoil him but i love him!!! he knows i will always be there.

Patricia - posted on 11/12/2008

Do you have a problem with him getting up or do you worry that there is something wrong with his waking? Many children night wake. If you really need to help him sleep longer at night so that you can sleep Dr Jay Gordon has a good plan for that (you can google it.) I also really liked the book Sleepless in America. Great perspective on sleep, our cultural biases toward it and also ideas on how to get more of it for everyone in the family.

Erica - posted on 11/12/2008

My son is 11 years old now, but when he was a baby I did let him cry it out. The first few nights were horrible and I cried outside his door. But, after just a few nights, he began to go to sleep very quickly after I put him down. We have never had bedtime problems since. Even when he was a toddler he understood that once we put him to bed, it was time to sleep. I know it's hard, but it worked for my child.

Carolann - posted on 11/12/2008

I too feel your pain. Maybe I was too soft, but I never let either of my girls cry it out. Early on I had to either feed or see when the last feeding was. Maybe re-wrap in their blankets. I would go in and check their diaper, if it was fine I would just give a hug and kiss and say goodnight. I would check to see if their "lovey" was out of reach, did they loose their pacifier, etc. Each time, i gave them a hug/kiss and said goodnight. We never had any issues of crying all night. I guess it was just checking to make sure the essentials were met and lay them back down and tell them it was time to go back to sleep. Good luck, it is so hard to know what the "right" thing to do is, just find what is right for your family.

Samantha - posted on 11/12/2008

It depends on your baby's age. There comes a point (when your baby is three months old or so) and they have put on enough baby fat at this point that they can sleep through that feed. Let baby cry for 5 minutes. Then go and comfort him. The next time legthen it to 10. Work your way up to 20 minutes. Your baby is reassured that you will come when he needs you, but he also is learning that it will be longer and longer between your visits. Over time he will be ready to sleep through the night. Each baby is ready at a different time. You can't go cold turkey, you have to work him into it. Bottom line, he'll let you know if he really needs you and you don't want him to lose confidence in you coming when he needs you by just letting him cry for two hours.



My daughter was three months old when I realized our midnight feed was more my habit than her need. She weighed enough that missing a feed wouldn't hurt her. My husband and I didn't get her that night and she continued to fuss, not really out and out cry, but fuss on and off for the rest of the night. The three of us didn't get the best night sleep but we came and got her in the morning as usual for her 5 am feed and all was well. The next night she slept through the midnight feed completely. She just had to learn that she could.

Sara - posted on 11/12/2008

I love the book The No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers, by Elizaeth Pantley,

We gave our 2 year old gifts from the dollor store for sleeping until the Sun is up. It took a bit but one she got the gifts she was willing to stay in bed for them. Lots and Lots of ideas in the book.

Ann - posted on 11/12/2008

Farber's "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" is a great book. It deals with basic how to get your child to sleep through the night plus some extra subjects like night terrors, what to do during illness, and my favorite...what to do when they vomit because they are so worked up and angry (my oldest pulled this one). I give it to all my doula clients

Amanda - posted on 11/12/2008

I would say that at one it is fine to let him cry. I don't like the method where you just leave them to cry completely alone. The method I use is I let my baby cry for 5-10mins, then go in and settle, then leave before he is back asleep, if cries wait the 5-10mins and return to baby etc. Then if he cries for more than 30 mins, I would give a little drink of water, then leave and repeat the process til he is back asleep. The first time you try it will be a battle, probably take about 1 hour. But each time he should cry less and less til he doesn't wake at all. it works best if they go to sleep by themselves to begin with, using the same method, and you have to do it every sleep to be consistent. hope this helps some. goodluck.

Robin - posted on 11/12/2008

When my daughter was 6 months old she started getting up around 1 am and staying up until around 4 am. This lasted 3 months. I was completely exhausted physically and emotionally. When I took her in for her 9 month appointment her pediatrician suggested 2 solutions. 1) do your night routine put her down and let her cry. If she wakes up during the night let her cry. 2) do your night routine put her down and if she cries go in and rub her back leave if she is still crying go in 5 minutes later rub her back and leave. Keep doing this increasing the minutes between visits by 5 minutes. We did the first. It took us two nights and on the third she put herself to sleep and slept through the night. Our second child is harder because they share a room. He is 1 years old and does the same as your child. He wakes up between 0-3 times a night. I wish I could let him cry it out. Good luck.

Ann - posted on 11/12/2008

I agree with Kim. I'd rather do it when they're 10 or 12 months than when they are 3 years and we have to have a battle every night at bedtime that goes on for hours until mom and dad give in. My advice to new moms and dads: That time between the two of you when the kids are in bed before you both go to bed is sacred and special. If you are fighting with a 2 year old or sharing a bed with a squirmy toddler you lose that time together. Children need to learn to go to bed on their own. It is not abuse or neglect. It's tough on a mom's heart but it is not abuse. Been there 3 times!!!

Michelle - posted on 11/12/2008

I personally cant do it....i got my 3 month old to sleep through the night other ways....But i have heard that it is the most effective way....

Janell - posted on 11/12/2008

If he just wants you.... Take a mommy vacation for a few days. My son didn't want my husband, just me so when i wasn't available he decided to sleep. I left for 4 nights and when i came back home he was sleeping through. BTW, my son was 8 months old when this worked.

Suzi - posted on 11/12/2008

My son is two and still get up sometimes too. After checking on him and rocking with him for a few minutes, I put him back to bed. If he cries after that I let him for about 15 minutes and then check on him again if he hasn't stopped. Usually he quites at about 10 minutes. I would try it...what do you have to lose? Good luck!

Julie - posted on 11/12/2008

He is fine during the day. Naps great. Sometimes it seems he just needs a mommy moment. Other times it is indeed something like gas....but my feeling is I dont know if i dont go check...right?

Julie - posted on 11/12/2008

He is a year old now. He gets up anywhere from once to three times a night.

Kim - posted on 11/12/2008

LOL I thought the same thing when my oldest was born. My husband had to practicaly hold me down to keep from going into her room! After 3 nights or so though she had no trouble. It's so much easier to do it earlier with them, then later.

Katie - posted on 11/12/2008

i feel your pain! how old is you baby?