DOES ANYONE ELSE STAY HOME ALL DAY EVERYDAY??

Lindsay - posted on 05/07/2010 ( 478 moms have responded )

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IM STARTING TO GO CRAZY STAYING HOME EVERYDAY TAKING CARE OF A LITTLE GIRL 16 MONTHS AND A 7 YR OLD BOY...I THINK MY SON HAS ADHD HE DOSEN'T LISTEN AT ALL CAN'T STAY STILL HES IN COUNCILING BUT HEZ MAKING ME CRAZY...I GET DEPRESSED STAYING HOME 24/7 ITS SO HARD NOTHING TO DO....EVERYDAY FEELS THE SAME TO ME...I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO???

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Elyssa - posted on 05/07/2010

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I was in that same situation for a while as well, I mean, I don't have an older child, but I was stuck at home with my toddler and it is very hard. One thing I found that helped me out a lot is actually taking the time to plan out a few activities to do with your kids every day. I even bought some books to give me some ideas, but there is a pretty awesome website that has a TON of ideas that will keep your kids busy. its www.familyfun.com I hope that helps!

Cheryl - posted on 05/08/2010

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Take a moment & pray.
Even if you have to retreat to the restroom!
Brush your teeth
shower/shave your legs
or just splash water on your face
Put on lip stick/lip gloss!
Paint your nails
Do 1 thing for yourself and then tackle the rest!
Breathe!
We often take that for granted. We have healthy lungs! Thank God! Just, breathe!

I'm 41 and worked all my life until 5 yrs ago! Our kids are 6 & 3
It's HARD to stay home! Bein' a "Domestic Diva"/CEO of the household, isn't all it's cracked up to be!

At first, the joy of drinkin' coffee & knowin' everyones rushin' off to work, made me happy! I loved it!
Then I got bored. Realized I couldn't afford to shop all day....
Wasn't motivated to work out or go to the gym.
Our 3yo sucked all the energy outa me! By 9AM she's ready to go some where...anywhere!
I have so much to do, I don't wanna go anywhere!
I feel like the maid & I don't get paid!

Any of this sound familiar???

Girl, "Hang in there"!
You are NOT alone!
Find something you love to do
Give & get hugs as often as possible
Give your son something to do...color/paint/plant something
Plan 1 activity a day for you and/or the kids
Take a walk
Ride bikes
visit your local library - free movies/books
Visit your Family Dr. & share how you're feelin' a R'x may help
Last but not least, Breathe & Pray again!
You have one more day. (some people won't...)

Happy Mother's Day to all the "hot mama's" who sacrafice so much of themselves & give all that they've got!
Hugs & lots of them!!!
Cheryl
San Antonio, TX

Erica - posted on 05/08/2010

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I also stay at home pretty much all day everyday.I have 3 kids, one is almost 5, another 3 & a 7 month old. I rarely go anywhere throughout the week,sometimes I ll try to go visit my mom to get out of the house. But Im 9 times out 10 at home with the kids. my husband works 40 plus hours a week.Its hard to take all 3 kids out by myself right They get bored staying home & so do I.Thats why when my husband is off , I wanna get out & do stuff & he doesnt quite understand , that we ve been cooped up in the house & we re ready to get out .He wants to sleep all day & we re ready to go go go

Rachel - posted on 05/10/2010

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reading all of your responses makes me so sad! I have a 4 year old, and 4 older stepkids from 10-15.

I feel bombarded by my never ending laundry pile and by constant bickering amongst the older ones and whining from the youngest ones, HOWEVER, we are only able to be moms to these little ones for a small time. it may seem boring and monotonous, but I promise you in 20 years you'll look back and think it went too quickly.

I am often frustrated, but I always do my best to keep my head high, make my husband happy so he may return the favor, and act preventative instead of reactive. hearing that all of you think you have rotten kids, well maybe you're letting them get away with too much and not acting preventative in your day to day routines.

I make my son help me with my chores during the day, I let him sit on the counter and we sing songs while I make dinner.

We have the ability to mold our children in to whatever we want them to be, it is up to us to instill good manners and social skill building in to our children. If you are depressed, take every inch of your energy, put on a smile, and pretend, because if you don't, your kids are going to be depressed right along with you.

Liz - posted on 01/13/2011

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I'm 39 and have a year old daughter who was three months premature. Since she came home from the hospital after 12 weeks, we've both been stuck at home except for medical appointments and the occasional (i.e. once every 2 months) trip across town to see her great grandparents.

I don't have any friends or colleagues in the country, as I emigrated to be with my husband in 2009. I don't have a job to return to as the experience and qualifications that I have from the UK would need to be redone in the USA for me to be able to work. We can't afford the tuition fees. Any job that I could actually get would bore me to tears as (and this is not said to self-promote, but just because I understand my limitations) I have two BA degrees and an MA. I need challenging jobs that require me to think. I could take a typing job, but I would be bored to tears within a month. Also, I wouldn't earn enough to have a nanny come to the house to look after my daughter. She is not allowed to go to daycare for at least another year, due to health reasons.

We can't afford to own and run another car, even if I were to take the driver's ed to get my licence for the USA. I drove in the UK, but the experience was totally different and I'm quite nervous about the concept of driving in the USA by comparison. Not that I have the choice, because we can't afford a second car.

We're so broke at the moment that I don't even get the $20 a week allowance that I used to get last year, so I can't really walk out anywhere with my daughter. Aside from coffee shops, which I have no money for, there's nowhere in walking distance to go. My husband understands and is doing is damndest. Sometimes he cries because he feels that he is failing as a provider...and I can only tell him that, no, he is being superhuman as it is and that none of this is his fault.

Meanwhile, I know nobody, have no means of getting to know anybody, can't get to any groups that are nearby, can't get out of the house at all. I just spend every single day from 7.30am to 5.30pm trying to kill time and trying not to cry.

The few people that I am in contact with from the UK are full of advice, but none of it actually helps as they don't really understand my situation. One of them might say 'invite people round for coffee!' as if that's the solution to my loneliness, but you do need to know people to be able to invite them round.

Even if I could get to a Mum and Baby group, I'm not sure how much that would help, as at nearly 40 I'm not exactly the textbook profile of a first time mum.

I know it will get better eventually, but it is definitely hard now. I have total sympathy for all other SAHMs who feel this stir-craziness.

This conversation has been closed to further comments

478 Comments

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Kim - posted on 06/16/2011

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Hi, I am a SAHM too of 10 1/2 month old twin boys. We stay mom most all the time, and I do understand getting depressed if you don't get out of the house. I try to take the boys outside and I let them sit on a blanket while I throw the ball to my 2 dogs. The boys love the dogs and love watching them. Where do you live? I am in Savannah, GA. It is so important for you to get out of the house...as I am sure you know...it will drive you in many negative directions. Take care, Kim

Katrina - posted on 06/16/2011

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i know how you feel i have two boys and i dont drive so im stuck. I feel like all i do is yell and the kids ignore me i need a vaction.lol. you love them but they are very good at stressing you out

Dea - posted on 06/16/2011

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i do it cause i don't own a car and the bus transite is 5 mile from my house. plus i won't walk my girls that far to catch the bus. I would wake tend to the girls why the hubby worked cleaned house and cook meals was my routin. I may be got out once a month to go grocery shopping. plus i didn't know anyone either so i had no one to hang out with our talk to other then the facebook friends. I was really needing a friend at times. Now i have one and we go out an do thing and tag our kids around.

[deleted account]

I stay home all day every day with four kids the oldest is 8 the youngest is 5 monnths! i know all about goin crazy lol, It helps if you have a car, having mine I dont feel as "traped" as I would with out it my 8 yr old son is kinda like that, and any time he starts acting up or not listeng or getting twitchy I send him out of the "common" areas, same goes for my 3 yr old to actually so that i dont end up getting mad at them, I tell them to go play or find something to do. Luckily we have a house full of games and stuff like that for them to do. As for you having nothing to do with your self, I took up makin ghats, then blankets, then it was reading ect ect. I change my mind alot so I usually have something to do. Just need to find your groove and all will work out.

Laura - posted on 06/16/2011

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Hi My name is Laura and I'm the proud mother to Maddie who is 2.5 yaears old and I am a SAHM for now. I have been looking for work but it has been hard trying to find anything but in the mean time I stay at home every day doing the same thing nothing ever really changes for me its the same routine day in and day out...and lately i have lost my will to clean and cook I just dont feel like it anymore its tooo boring, and its been raining here for days now and that makes it even harder to get out it sucks when it rains because it means im stuck inaide for sure in a basement suite none the less....so I would love to hear how other moms pass the time

Laura - posted on 06/16/2011

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Hi My name is Laura and I'm the proud mother to Maddie who is 2.5 yaears old and I am a SAHM for now. I have been looking for work but it has been hard trying to find anything but in the mean time I stay at home every day doing the same thing nothing ever really changes for me its the same routine day in and day out...and lately i have lost my will to clean and cook I just dont feel like it anymore its tooo boring, and its been raining here for days now and that makes it even harder to get out it sucks when it rains because it means im stuck inaide for sure in a basement suite none the less....so I would love to hear how other moms pass the time

Zoe - posted on 04/11/2011

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Where do you live? do you have a park nearby? a river?, canal?, wood?
Can you get to a toddler group?
Try looking at some blogs to see what other mums do.

Kalyn - posted on 03/14/2011

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ohhhh girl I feel your pain.... I have a 16 boy Major issues , 14 girl sassy prissy mean girl, and 8 boy he is my hope but he is learning from the older ones. He is my HOPE... lol there might be hope still....
My children have issues requires me to be home and work from home. SUCKS. I have a break down every 6 months... use to be monthly and weekly. I thought maybe it was just me. try to be the best mom ever but failing horriably. Talk to you soon and keep your head up

Shauna - posted on 03/11/2011

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I only have one son, an almost 5 month old, but I know what you mean. We live in Montana where it has been really cold and a long winter, so cabin fever is at an all time high! It helps to go for a stroller ride, even though it's 30 degrees. I also go to a reading group at the local library for ages birth to 2 yrs, which is really fun and I also get to chat with other moms. I know what some moms mean about the husband working and when they finally get time off they just want to stay home and relax while I want to get out and do something! It's all about compromising. I also thought I'd tell everyone about this fact I've heard that has really helped me: only 5 minutes of being outside and getting fresh air a day will boost your mood, so I do this everyday. Good luck and remember you're a great mom!

Jennifer - posted on 03/11/2011

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I know exactly how you feel. I have a 2.5 yr old and and 18 yr old. The weather here is bad and we are stuck in the house ALL DAY, EVERYDAY!!!!! Feel like I am going crazy. Have you tried finding a hobby, I know it's hard with little ones, I can't do the ones I used to. Things do get easier, it just feels like they won't. Give it time. Read or watch a show for YOU when the little one naps. hang in there.

Annalee - posted on 03/10/2011

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I was going mad as well being a SAHM, i had given up my job after my youngest was born, not realising that this recession was going to be the way it is, and then dh got shift wrk....so between being at home, being broke, and having to keep kids quiet for dh to sleep for his wrk...i was going mad!!!

I started getting involved in community work and i now volunteer quiet alot. I helped set up a youth club for the area i live in and that meets every wed nite, i sometimes cannot go if dh is wrking but i try my best not to miss it. I also go visit a few older folk in my town and check in on them. It has helped me alot...keeping busy, coz before it felt that like my mind was wasting at home....its not rocket science to cook & clean...and i was craving adults to talk to.

Now with the volunteering i am a much happier person, My kids r getting the best out of me as i am not so frustrated anymore and dh has also seen the difference, i am not nagging him for attention all the time...which he loves:)

Donna - posted on 03/10/2011

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It is really unhealthy for all of you to be in so much. I have a mission to be out for half of every day, between the shopping, gym and park I manage this every day. I would go mad otherwise.
Try to find others you can walk to mee up with as well, for example I meed a friend once a week for lunch in the cafe of the supermarket (kills an hour and a half!)

Kalyn - posted on 01/18/2011

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Getting involved in this website is helping me not be bored when i am getting sad at my life of 24-7 being at home. So I can i am not the only one. I wish we would get more badges or something for the more we are on here. Than i would be on even more. Have a good day sweetie and keep your head up. add me if you wanna talk about anything

Alana - posted on 01/17/2011

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There is no way I could stay home 24/7. After 2 days at home I and my kids go a bit crazy. I find that getting outside for a walk to the park makes a BIG diffrence on the days that we are home. Kids need to run around and blow off steam just like we do. I have 3 toddlers and even in the dead of Alberta winters we go out sledding and skiing (cross-country) in our park near our home. On the extra cold days we meet up with friends at one of many kids friendly coffee shop/play zones. If the idea of getting out is too much I call up everyone I know and see if maybe one of them might like to come over with their kids for a playdate. I do find when it is warmer in the summer we do get out a lot more but no matter what the weather getting out of these 4 walls is my sanity as home can be my own personal loony bin.

Alexis - posted on 01/17/2011

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Get out of the house! your son is probably going crazy being inside all the time too. Walk to a park, go to a friends\ family's house, go to the library, join a playgroup do something! You need to get out of the house and get your kids out too.

Jamie - posted on 01/17/2011

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I feel the same way. i stay at home with 3 boys all under 5. I just feel sometime like is this it.I am in the house all day long 7 day a week. I hope that everything gets better and if u ever need someone to talk to i am here hun.

Amanda - posted on 01/13/2011

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...I don't have a license b/c we can't afford insurance for me..my husband works 12 hour shifts so i stay home with my babies all day...I am 24 and i have never had one...my parents didn't let me get them after i took drivers ed in school but my older sister did and my younger brother...now i am the only one of my sibblings that has kids and might actually need a license and car. It seems like a lot of the time at home i am cleaning, doing laundry, feeding the baby or something though...but sometimes i do wish that i could just go somewhere and leave the dishes for a while lol

Sarah - posted on 01/13/2011

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Yes, I stay home also...we share one vehicle so it makes it harder to get out. We go to the park, and take walks.

Kristy - posted on 01/13/2011

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I wish I had some awesome advice for you but I don't. I just wanted to let you know I am doing the same thing. 5 years now I have stayed home 24/7. My kids are 5 and 3. I don't use daycares, no school yet, my Army husband is always gone and family lives too far away. I will tell you that everyone tells me to get a hobby!! Well it is hard to get a hobby when you are stuck at home all day. So I started answering posts on this site and doing social networks. Only thing I could find to keep me sane. And with your 7yr old, try taking privileges away until he is ready to act correctly. Privileges can be: friends coming over, TV, certain toys or just about anything that you know will make him upset and send the message that he needs to listen. And be consistent. eventually he will realize you aren't going to give in and that he has to calm down. I hope you feel better soon. I know it is easier said then done, since I am going through the same. Keep posting and chatting with people and friends!!! Stay strong!!

Sherri - posted on 01/13/2011

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Yes I stay at home 24/7 unless I need to run out for an errand for one of the kids. Other than that I rarely if ever leave the house.

Cindy - posted on 01/13/2011

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You could try taking them to the park to let him burn off energy. I home school and have a a 7 yr old and a 4 yr old. I stay home all the time as well. except when we do things. We get involved in story time, play dates with other home schooled kids and do many church actitivies. You could even try getting the 7 yr old into sports of some sort. Try rewarding good behavior as it happens. My 7 yr old loves money so we reward with money. Sounds silly but even pennys and nickels work for simply hugging her sister, apologizing, etc. Find things to do in your neighborhood.

Heidi - posted on 06/17/2010

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I am in that same situation. But i started working from home so the kids and I can get out and about every few days. Can you take the kids to the park?

Sara - posted on 06/17/2010

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I stay home with my kids. I have a son turning 7 in Sept. and a daughter turning 5 in a month. I am the living definition of stir crazy! :D I would not change things, I love that I can stay home, and that my husband sees the benefit to our children having a mommy at home with them. However I also have to remind him that it's A LOT more taxing on the brain than pretty much any other job out there! Summer is upon us, and I have both home all day every day, It looks quite daunting. I try to break it up, like live to the next "event" the next one coming up is my In-laws visitng in a week and a half, I can make it that long, after that, it will be a week of Grant in day camp,. then a week of Sammy in half day camp, then I will make it to my next "event" a trip home to Vermont. So, just try to break it up into smaller amounts. I am also a hermit, so I'm not big into play dates or mom groups, but I do have a neighbor I have met recently who has similar aged kids, and common interests, so we just set up a weekly play date for the summer. I also have a pool nearby, in our neighborhood, which is nice, but when I didn't, I always had a kiddie pool, and sprinkler, plenty stuff for them to stay wet and cool on hot days. one day at a time, you can do it! It does get easier!!

Heidi - posted on 06/17/2010

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I am a stay at home mom with my little girl she is 3 years old and i have a 6 year old son as well i had the same trouble with my son but i found that by taking him off coolaid that he calmed right down between the dye and the sugar its a bad combination for kids and it can make them go off the walls i found this out by the company i work for they are an all natural company. Also by giving my son simple things to do to help out around the house helps to also my kids like to help make supper and help pick out supper they love to be in kitchen helping me. By getting them involed by doing stuff keeps them from wanting to get introuble because they are bored too just like you are!!!

Valerie - posted on 06/12/2010

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I was the same way as many moms are! I have 2 girls who are schoolers...thank goodness! But when they were home...we went to parks, made craft stuff at home, played games, made movie day and when they are were sleeping it was time to yourself...pamper yourself...Have playdates if you have friends ....everyday is a new day...make a schedule of things ya'll would like to do. Make it simple...like edible clay. Even going outside to look for bugs is awesome...if you like that kind of thing.

I wish you the best!!! Good luck!

Deanna - posted on 06/12/2010

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Gymboree classes are expensive...not everyone can afford them. There are other alternatives out there.

Jennifer - posted on 06/12/2010

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Yes, I do, my kids were in Preschool until this school year was over and in August they start Kindergarten. I am going back to school also. I am going into education and the Health field online! I am also a MaryKay Consultant and a Shaklee consultant and I just recently signed up with Scentsy also. I love it! I love being home with my kids!

Lindsay - posted on 06/12/2010

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Hi,
I totally feel you, i can relate to you in so many ways,i stay home everyday as well,even if i take my 10 month year old daughter out,it's still the same thing all the time:) I go nuts at times,cause i don't drive and i feel trapped! i'd love to make more friends but it seems that everyone is always bust,and for me it's just the same old thing! I dunno what more to say but i totally understand you!

Jennifer - posted on 06/11/2010

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I know how you feel i have a 4 1/2 year old daughter and a 4 month old son and my daughter will not listen to anything i say and her blood father who i am not with could care less. I stay at home 24/7 and yes it can get real stressful being in the house 24/7 best thing i can say is enjoy the years with the kids my lil sis graduated last week and i can remeber all the good times and bad we had together.play games get a hobby i like to clean lol yeah it is boring or i just get online and try to look for jobs from home if you ever need to talk i am here

Deanna - posted on 06/11/2010

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Get help!!!!! You need to take care of yourself. Ever hear the saying, "If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy?" I am a SAHM of two and a full-time student. It can get very stressful. If you think your son has ADHD, get an official diagnosis. Also, go to meetup.com and search for a group. You can search for mommy, playdate, mommy with kids of ADHD whatever you need, there is sure to be a group in your area. I moved to Orlando two years ago and without the group the I joined, I would have hated it here. I made a lot of friends and we do some great activities.

Patti - posted on 06/05/2010

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wow.. i just made a rant myself about almost the same thing earlier today. i know it sux. playgroups might be a good idea for you. ive been trying to get into one myself. no luck so far tho finding one thats right for us. i feel your pain tho! it seems to be im not the only one with this issue. almost kinda makes me feel not so alone :)

Diana - posted on 06/05/2010

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I stay at home, too. Unlike so many of these ladies without their DL, I have a license, but that does NOT make traveling with three rowdy boys any easier! We were blessed to find a house to rent out in the country with a fully fenced yard. However, it is a 1/2 mile from a small town that barely has a grocery store. My mom lives in our old town (I'm at her house now-country living usually = no internet/expensive 'net). I come visit MaaMa regularly just for a change and a little sanity and air conditioning (yeah, no AC, either).
I suggest giving your children chores. Your daughter can do little ones like you hand her clothes to put in the dryer and you sit on the floor holding containers that her toys go in while she brings them to you. Your son is definitely able to pick up after himself (start small if he's used to you doing everything for him), 'make' his bed, 'help' with dinner, etc. He may even be able to read (if he's that far in school and pretend if not) a few beginner books to his sister so you can get 5 minutes to go to the bathroom!
And after that, take a walk to find things. Keep your 'collections' till you've found out something about each object and then get rid of them and start over! Leave the laundry and mix up some bubbles and find different things to use as wands to see which ones work best and go out and have fun! (science) Teach him how to measure ingredients and make cookies together. (math, home ec) Try to keep them learning and help them to please and you and they will be much more engaged and happy!
Now, to go take some of my own advice...good luck, hon!

Laura - posted on 06/02/2010

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im the same way i have a one year old and a three month old my husband works all the time and its always just me and the kids.. i just keep busy cleaning and trying to play with the kids and when they take a nap i take "me time"

Kristy - posted on 06/01/2010

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I'm home everyday all day too. But I just found out about a group called mothers and more you should see if theres one in your area.

Kariema - posted on 06/01/2010

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I'm home with my kids as well but lucky they all at school in the morning, which gives me a bit of a break. My youngest is also 7yrs old with adhd and I know how hard it can be. I've been using a natural product called Mind Set which has been helping. Maybe you can try it while you doing the counselling. He was off it for a while and the jumping all over returned, I didn't realise he had stopped doing that until he started it again. Good Luck and try to be positive and remember he can't control his behaviour

Megan - posted on 05/31/2010

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i know how u feel!! im stuck at home all day everday with my 5 month old daughter.. my partner has protruding discs in his back so he is on constant bed rest so im also looking after him aswell!! sometimes i dont no whose more of a baby my partner or my lil girl!! i also dont have a drivers license so that limits what i can do also... any ideas anyone?

Sally - posted on 05/31/2010

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I don't know where you live or what your weather is like, but I live in the desert and now in order to do something outdoors you have to get up pretty early. Plus we are on a budget so I am looking up free and cheap things to do and plan to check out that website mentioned earlier. I have faith that a good splash pad is what I need for my family and lots of sunscreen, but again, you will be planning your schedule around your little one and depending on how much sleep you get, you may find that you need certain time blocks to rest and recouperate.

If early morning activities work for you then get your kids on that schedule-- it will wear your big one out so that you have your 10- 15 min for you hopefully and then be ready with the next activity such as walking around in a shopping mall with clear intent not to buy but to have an exercise challenge. There are different things that you can do to get that energy worked out of your active big boy (racing games in your back yard or at the park for instance: Go to the tree, run to the monkey bars, go accross and then hurry over to the basketball post. Make him drink lots of water, offer sugar-free snacks-- it will take him time to do all of this while you can sit down and have the baby on a picnic blanket or in a pack n'play or whatever is appropriate.

Be crafty with your activity schedule and give him chores and tasks to help you with things throughout the day. If you are at your witts-end with trying to have him pick up blocks or army men or action figures or whatever, have him spread out a flat sheet that would allow easy pick-up! Take him to Costco for a hotdog if you have a membership. that part is cheap and will remove you from your home long enough to feel like you've done something.

Set certain times that you have him choose quiet activities to do (and this will be challenging) but set a timer and let him know that this 20 minutes is for you to have your own quiet mommy time ( and you may be doing things with the baby but that is how things are going to be done. )

Just some ideas that I HOPE are helpful-- we are all different. I have leaned some of these techniques through friends with active kids and I have 2 girls 16mo. apart in age. Now they are 5 and 6 y/o and not adhd, but when they were littler life was much more challenging. I didn't leave my house for weeks at a time with two babies or two tots but I did start getting advice on how to get out and live and once I figured out that I could do it and how I could do it staying at home became easier.

The biggest part for me actually was accepting that my role at home was more important than me going out to work. I may be able to try it though when both kids are past kindergarten and one is so woo-hoo!

Get ahold of some signing time videos or something-- that really helped us too because they are short, educational, and involve song and imagery. It will be great for the little one for sure.

Gina - posted on 05/30/2010

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I am a single stay at home mom of 3 kids. 6, 5, and 2. I also babysit 4 other kids (2 4year olds, a 3 year old and a 1 year old) the hours ranging from 5am to 11 pm. I don't even have enough room in my van for all of them at the same time so going somewhere is not an option. when it was just me and my 3 we were constantly going out and then I started babysitting 2 kids and we still all went out but not as often. now I don't go out at all. I have my Mother come into the city atleast once a week to go and get my groceries and I have a friend that does my banking and goes and pays my rent for me. I haven't even been off my property in about 2 months. it's frustrating but I deal with it.

Charlene - posted on 05/29/2010

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THIS IS TO THOSE FEW WHO MAY NOT UNDERSTAND HOW SO MANY OF US CAN FEEL THIS WAY......
its not that so many of us don't like and cherish our children and our time with them, it's just that it can get though!! And frankly, I can't see how any mother wouldn't be able to understand that!

Let's face it, raising well rounded children is the hardest job in the world! Aside from providing them with all of their basic needs such as food, clothing, shelter, health care, protection, and love, then we have to figure out the best ways to teach them right from wrong, manners, how to treat others, how to protect themselves and what to be leary of (especially in this day and age), how to do for themselves, and the list goes on........all the while trying to maintain some sense of who we are, ourselves. Even just trying to find new ways to keep them busy and happy can be hard once you've done everything you can think of.

And please remeber that what might come so naturally to some of us, may not come as easily to others. Plenty fo us struggle! After all, some 400 moms responded empathetically to Lindsays call for help. I believe it's perfectly normal to feel the way she does, and is obviously by no means rare. I myself have two children and suffer from depression. It's a serious condition; a disease that is potentially fatal. But I love my children with all of my heart and only want the best for them. But I know I can't take care of them unless I take care of myself, too. And I just think that ONE OF THE BEST THINGS WE CAN DO AS MOTHERS, AS WOMEN, AS HUMAN BEINGS, IS TO ENCOURAGE EACH OTHER AND LET ONE ANOTHER KNOW THAT WE ARE NOT ALONE AND THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO WILL HELP US ALONG!! ALSO, DON'T FORGET THAT GOD IS ALWAYS THERE FOR YOU AND LOVES YOU FOR YOU ARE HIS CHILD, AND HE LOVES YOU WITH ALL OF HIS HEART!!

GOD BLESS ALL OF YOU WHO TOOK THE TIME TO LET LINDSAY KNOW THAT SHE IS NOT ALONE!! YOU ARE ALL STRONG, INSPIRATIONAL WOMEN!!

Kelly - posted on 05/29/2010

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I feel your pain I have a 6, 5, 4, 2, and 4 month old I stay at home except when i go to the store or takin a kid to the dr. Me and my husband used to fight like crazy cuz i got so stressed so we now each get 1 night a week where we can go do whatever I get saturday and i take a dance class he has sunday and hangs with his friends playing games (we do seperate nights because he does share in my intrest of dancing) and we never have to worry about a sitter. U need to make time for yourself here and there no matter what even if it is just an uninterupted bath there is nothing wrong with doing something for yourself without the kids it is a need thing to keep any mom sane any who says otherwise is just needing to brag

[deleted account]

Hi there! I cant say ive felt suffocated or crazy, im one of those people who just thrives on the stay at home mum thing. BUT, at the same time, i can totally see how someone could feel this way. You must make sure to remember, you are your own person still. I think when we have a children, many of us can feel like we are no longer a person, its just baby baby baby, child, child, child. Being cooped up in a house repeating the same chores over and over and over, and feeding and cleaning and feeding and cleaning aaaahhhhhhh!!!!! .... Plus, People say hello to the baby and forget to greet you. People ask how baby is before they ask how you are, hubby cuddles baby more than he hugs you now, but we have to remember, its because they are a huge and exciting part of your life that the people you love really want to be a big part of. You are still you, but now, its not about you anymore, its about raising your child, loving them, teaching them, shaping them for there future. We had our time as wide eyed children with all that freedom and discovery. We had our time as a teenager going out and having spontaneous fun all over the place, now its a new chapter. Now we are to give our babies, children, teens, just as good, (or far better in many cases) an experience as we had. It is now our mission to make their lives wonderful. BUT at the same time, we are real people. We have needs and feelings and desires and dreams. You never stop wanting adventure and fun and friends etc, and that is perfectly normal, as long as it doesn’t take priority over your job as a mother. But one thing you must must do for your own sanity, is to still take some me time every day. And still have something you do other than mumming. Not only, should you use some of your babys sleep time to do something for yourself, but if you can afford it, take up a hobby one day a week if you have a mum or nanna or aunt or sister who is willing to babysit for a few hours. If you cant afford to join the gym, or go take a dance class, or a craft class, just go to the beach for a few hours with a friend, or go bike riding, or join a community thing thats free. On your own. Some ppl don’t need this, but many really do. And there is no shame in that. And dont forget, a full time job is also repetative, its also, the same thing every day, so being at home isnt different. its just that we dont have adult company while we do it, but you can still make it fun and new! get creative :-) take your kids on walks to the park, feed the ducks, put on some music, it doesnt always have to be kids music as long as its not full of swearing and all that, take up a hobby you can do from home, gardening, crafts, cooking fab desserts, create a website, start a blog, learn to sew and make urself hot clothes, whatever. Your 7 year old might just be as bored as you are!! if hes not at school at his age he must be getting restless... maybe you could think of some fun things to do with him! take him out and teach him about the world with your little girl in her stroller so she doesnt get tired. google "things to do with your kids" all three of you will benifet from getting out the house a few times a week and your older one will certainly look forward to it if you make it a fun thing. but dont forget the day for you also. hope this helps :-)

Amanda - posted on 05/28/2010

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I feel for you. I stay at home with my 13 month old and a 5 year old boys and it can be stressful. Sometimes just taking the kids to a park or just out in the yard to play helps. Exercise does them and you good. Also if they take naps, use that as your time, take a bath,read a book or something that is relaxing for you. That will help with the stress and hopefully the depression. If they don't take naps set aside some quiet time. While my toddler naps I turn on cartoons for my 5 year old and that is my relaxing time. It helps.

Hannah - posted on 05/28/2010

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Most 7 yr old boys can't stay still! Boys especially need a LOT of physical activity to burn off all their energy. If you're going crazy being home all the time, imagine how he must feel. Get outside, go for walks, go to the playground. Indoor gyms for kids are great, or go to the mall and walk around. You should consider joining a rec center as well.

Andrea - posted on 05/25/2010

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Hey I had exactly the same problem staying home all day eevery day with my son. Try getting out to the park or having a walk with the children, perhaps find some play groups/mother and baby groups to go to. You may not feel like it because of the depression but trust me, if you manage to get the energy to do these things, it will help! Maybe buy some activities/games to play with the children in doors? x

Melanie - posted on 05/22/2010

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I think I know how you feel. Although, I only have one kid, and I'm the one with adhd and ocd.
My bf works 3rd shift and second shift with 2 jobs. He's gone 6 days a week during the time when all my friends' husbands are sharing dinner, movies etc. with their families. Then on his day off he's running errands, or sleeping.
Our house has a serious heating issue. This winter in KY was one of the coldest in a long time. I was forced to sit next to the heater in a blanket. The cost of gas tied our hands as far as moving. My daughter (dressed in layers) didn't seem to mind the cold and found me to be boring. So she and I grew apart and it killed me. I became very depressed. Now that it's warm we've been making pointless trips to the store, just to get out of the house. We live so far out in the sticks that we can't walk anywhere. As a matter of fact people drive 60+ mph on our one lane road. Even to play in our yard, requires my full attention.
Try making a trip to the zoo, library, or park. The walking should help with the adhd. Make yourself change out of your pjs, everyday (or at least a few of the week). Make one day of the week a day to give yourself a pedi/mani, or try a new hair style from pursebuzz.com. Go to bed a little early and bring a glass of wine, a good book or movie (free from the library, or course!) and put on the lotion from your pre baby days. I just recently started doing these things. It has helped me so much. I hope that it works for you too.

Christy - posted on 05/22/2010

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i have a 3 yr old girl and an 8 yr old boy and my boy has the same problems it takes me 30 mins to get him to do anything he whines are argues and gets an attitude, what i do is take walks this really helps. I walk to friends houses and to the store and play the i spy game

Marsha - posted on 05/22/2010

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i know the feeling! some days do feel the same over and over again like the movie groundhog day! LOL i have a 10 y/o who also has ADHD and is on meds for that, and a 5 y/o who is lovable but can drive u crazy in a heartbeat!! i get out of the house with volunteering at my kid's school these days since i have quit work; if u could u could get a mother's day out program for ur 16 months old to get some needed time to urself!

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