First week of being a stay at home mom is almost over.
MOST HELPFUL POSTS
Jill - posted on 06/15/2012
Everyone sucks at being a SAHM in the beginning. You'll find your rhythm. If you have a preconceived notion about what you should or must do - throw it out. Do what works for your family and things will fall into place.
Bethany - posted on 06/15/2012
that's ok, it stands for "stay at home mum". That's all you need to do. Stay home. Be home. Your own style will come forward all by itself, and that of your kids. We all do different things every day, and some similar things, too, but in a different order but the one thing we have in common? We are at home. With our kids. and we have all day to do it, not the rushed hours before and after work. So take your time, what ever you do.
My husband works 9-5, on a low-moderate income (apparently, according to current stats). Similar to Michelles husband, he leaves me be to do my work without judgment. He sees me on the weekend, just automatically constantly doing my work and so knows the amount of stuff that actually gets done in a day without it seeming like much is getting done.
I follow Flylady.net to stay on top of the domestic side of things, and the rest of the time, which is alot, with only one low-energy 3 year old girl, we just hang out and play and go out and about. there's the library, the 50 000 local parks, shopping centres, museums, etc.
She has a different group or arrangement every morning but Monday and the weekend. the weekend's for Daddy, and all the birthday parties, and Monday we get a big job done around the house, or go visiting. Tuesday is playgroup at a local church, Wed is my local playgroup that I run at the local community centre, Thur we play with the same little family at their house or ours or a park or what ever, Frid is kindergym. Afternoons are at home, just playing and pottering about, napping, getting tea ready and having a bit of a tidy up, etc.
I tell ya, it's a charmed life. Just take it as you like it. Routine will be your sanity and give your days purpose, also.
Wendi - posted on 07/03/2012
my daughters are 5 and 1.We have really been enjoying each other. I have come up with a little schedule and routine. I am happy to know I'm not alone out here. I start to feel a little akward not working but i am warming up to it
Momma Of 4 - posted on 06/26/2012
It's so hard going from working to being at home. Some people think it is a breeze but it is hard for both you and your kids.
Don't worry a routine will happen and you will end up happy. I became a stay at home mom in January and hadn't decided if I wanted to work or not. I had alot of guilt though because my fiance is NOT my sons father.... and I was a stay at home mom without it being his kid. Can you understand my guilt?
Anyways as of March I started a dayhome. I get to spend time with my son, we play we learn AND he has friends now too!!!!
Give it some time, its a great adjustment!!! Good luck!
Melissa - posted on 06/24/2012
Be patient with yourself. You may decide it is for your family and you may decide it isn't. Check into a local library for activities to do. Check out local theaters many offer free or just $2.00 kid movies during the summer. Meet some other moms so you get some adult conversation. Don't expect your kids or spouse to meet all of your needs.
Heather - posted on 06/22/2012
Hang in there! If it works for you, then continue staying home. If not, maybe work part time. I worked a 50-65 hour week until I was eight months pregnant, then became a SAHM. It was a total shock to the system! My daughter is 6 and starting all day school this fall. I plan on going back to work part time now. Staying at home can be challenging to say the leas but I do not regret it. However, if you need/want to work it is a personal choice, don't let anyone get you down.
Bonnie - posted on 06/18/2012
I agree with everyone telling you that you will learn as you go. It's something all parents learn for their own unique way of living. No two days are alike, at least that is how it is for me. There are ups and downs, when you feel like things are just falling into place and getting done, and then other days when it was just so busy, and yet you feel like nothing was accomplished.
Kids don't need to have lots of outings, or always have something going on to be happy that you are with them. I remember a lady who would spend 15 minutes on a chore, walk away to spend time with her kids, and then come back to a chore for another 15 minutes, and just rotate what she needed to get done, along with breaks for the kids, and herself too. Her home was clean, and kids happy, and she wasn't forgotten either.
Of course, that isn't for me, I have my own way of getting things done, and spending time with family/friends. If you have a crock pot/slow cooker, I would suggest using it often, you can make more than one meal at a time, and it can do so throughout the day, while you are busy doing other things. A home doesn't need to be spotless, and kids get messy often, as long as they look clean when we head outside in public, I try not to get upset.
Enjoy this time while it lasts, they grow up so fast.
Katrina - posted on 06/16/2012
Y ou can never go wrong with a slow cooker. I get up earlier than my kids so I can have my coffee in peace and make a start on dinner. Chuck it in the slow cooker and I don't have to do anything else with it except chec k a few times throughout the day to make sure it has enough liquid. Doing silly and fun things helps me get through the day. When it rains, it's natures invitation to get muddy and slide everywhere, look like monsters etc. The kids got bored last weekend and I had their cousins over for sleep overs, and all it took was for one child to throw a ball at another and it was ON!! (you know, those 100-ball-sets for little kids blow up play areas) My gosh I could not see the floor for all the "ammo" but everyone had an awesome time. It was an area where nothing could get broken. I also have a "useful box" with recycleable items so the kids can just grab glue, tape, scissors etc and create - great boredom buster. These things help pass the time, helps me to feel happy, abd keeps them busy so you can get stuff done. And remember, dishes in the kitchen means there are full bellies, toys on the floor means you've been blessed with children and a noisy home means everyone's having fun. Like everyone else, I think you shouldn't be hard on yourself. Parenting is hard and finding ways to entertain can be daunting. All the while you have a house to run. Be kind to yourself, it takes time to build a routine that works for your family. Good luck xxx
Leola - posted on 06/16/2012
It will be okay being a parent is what you make it its a lote of thinks you can do with the kids with out moving your car indoors games like make ice cream pizza its fun all around you just think about what you like to do me and my kids play games all the time
Zoe - posted on 06/16/2012
It's all about trial & error, nothing comes straight away.
The simplest of things sometimes makes the most fun.
If you do messey things then make sure you have the cleaning stuff ready before hand.
Have music on and jump around till you fall.
If you have a bad day, just remember tomorrow is another day.
With everything it just takes time.
Melissa - posted on 06/15/2012
The first couple of weeks are hard for everyone. Its a whole new lifestyle and you have to come up with a whole new routine, it doesnt happen overnight. The first week I was home with my newborn daughter my house was a complete mess, i didnt make healthy dinners (frozen pizza every night!) and i didnt know how to go to the grocery store with a newborn. Week by week it started getting easier and easier. My daughter is 8 months old now and I go grocery shopping every couple days, I cook healthy meals for dinner, I exercise usually in the evenings (im 10 lbs smaller than my pre pregnancy weight which i never thought was possible!), i vacuum every day and steam mop my floors twice a day! I look back and there was no way i could have done with 7-8 months ago and now i feel like super mom! It will get easier hang in there all that matters is that your a great mommy and wife! Focus on your family and dont sweat the small stuff! soon it will be summer and you can take your kids to the park and do fun things to get of the house!!
Sandy - posted on 06/15/2012
Like the other women said, you'll get the hang of it soon enough. Everyone has their own way of doing things and finding their own way of doing them. The really fun part is getting the rest of the family to help out. Ha ha! Good luck! Hang in there. ☺
Wendi - posted on 06/15/2012
thanks ladiiees.....today has been a much better day. I am getting into a routine and starting to get the swing of things. We are done by 3pm and I start on dinner so that it is ready for my husband by 5. I think things will get better with time. thanks again.....thsis has def been a learning process.
Krystal - posted on 06/15/2012
Michelle, you are so right in saying that people think it is easy. A lot of people dont think about how much you do during the day. The parents that work dont realize that someone at the daycare, or their nanny, or whomever they get to watch their children is doing so much while they dont see. We have to be a cook, a maid, a doctor, a teacher, an accountant, a negotiator, a peace maker, a comforter, an enforcer, and so on... and although those parents have to do that in the evening when they get home and in the morning before they head off for work... there are 8 or more hours in between that they dont have to do that for. Plus, there is no one messing up the house, no screaming, no one crying, no one to entertain, or give all of your attention to, no one else to cook for, or put down for a nap... some days, my husband will come home and the house will be a mess and dinner isnt ready and it looks like ive sat on my butt all day watching tv... in reality... its been a hell of a day and i need a break!
Just remember, you are doing one of the most important jobs, and it is one that very rarely gets acknowledged. Us stay at home moms know that you do a lot more than what it seems, and we are always here for ya!
Michelle - posted on 06/14/2012
I find my kids don't mind if we don't go out all the time. The older ones actually prefer staying home and my youngest one just wants to be around her brothers and annoy them :-)
It's a big step going from working to staying at home though. Somedays when my husband gets home I look around and wonder what I did all day. He never says anything though, he knows it will be done eventually. He says as long as the kids are looked after he doesn't care.
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