for sahms..

Tah - posted on 11/30/2010 ( 50 moms have responded )

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why do sahms think that working moms are jealous of them?...i wonder where that comes from? I just read a post and if i read one more person say that working moms are jealous i will barf up my special K. I do both and have been both. I have never been jealous of sahms, i had one judgemental and condescending sahm tell me i was and it was news to me. I know plenty of moms that work and trust me, noone ever sits around and says " i am so jealous of the sahms, i mean my life would be so much better if i could be like them"...some may want to stay at home i am not saying that. But what exactly makes people think that it's a jealousy issue?...

i am curious...

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Charlie - posted on 11/30/2010

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Tah , I am curious as to why you would join SAHM community as a working mother , I get that you want an answer to this question and it seems that it is a question that bothers you a lot , from what I have gathered from other threads on other communities , I think you should really not let it bother you so much , People do what people do and it shouldn't matter what the motive is because it's no one else's business , every family is unique in it's own way whether its SAHM or WM or whether they have two mums or whether they are religious or not , these differences make the variety of people that we and our children are , people should just get over this whole working mum V stay at home mum crap for some people they may see being a SAHM as being a luxury and in this economy it may be for those who cannot afford to stay home for others working is a luxury because many women crave something else like adult stimulation and thats not a bad thing either .

If your confident in your decisions you don't need answers to questions that don't matter .

[deleted account]

Wow, Tah, you're still hung up on that?! Says a lot....

Anyway, to clear things up, sahms don't all assume that all working moms are jealous of them, but when the working mom is making snide comments, like the ones you made to me, then it becomes pretty obvious that the working mother is less than thrilled with her own position.

I too have done both--working outside the home and working inside the home. I felt that my life was too busy and too full for me to enjoy it when I was balancing so many roles, so I cut out the least valued one.

I understand from your comments here that your fulfillment comes more from material possessions than free time for yourself, that is fine, but when you to tell a sahm she has no right to stay in bed and recover when she is sick, just because she does not have a job outside the home, then proceed to tell her to get a job so she can earn the right to rest when she is sick, you have to expect that someone is going to interpret that as jealousy, or condescension at the very least.

[deleted account]

Hmmm, I was thinking the same thing Loureen posted. Not sure why you're here in a community FULL of SAHMS? Tah, I mean no disrespect but I've seen you comment in several debates in other communities and whenever the topic of SAHMS vs. working moms comes up you seem to have a chip on your shoulder. You cannot judge an entire group of working moms OR SAHMS by one or two, or even a few of them.

[deleted account]

"I am glad you had support that brightened your day, and i figured that when the same ladies came on attacking me and my motives after our first exchange,i was not unaware, but it is always nice to have someone in your corner."

?? I'm sorry, maybe I'm just too tired to be trying to read right now, but this is going right over my head. I was thanking the ladies for posting, not trying to make you aware of anything...I don't want to sound rude, but would you mind clarifying?

[deleted account]

"why do sahms think that working moms are jealous of them?"--Tah

I have an answer, though I'm not sure if Tah will bother considering it.
First, not all sahm's think that ALL working moms are jealous of them, but in the posts where many sahm's are stating that the working mom is probably jealous, the OP is about a working mom or group of working moms who are making snide comments about the sahm's role. Therefore, the reason the sahm's responding to those posts think that the working moms mentioned in the OP are jealous is that the working mom is making rude comments.

Now, I have a question for Tah, if she will answer it in return: Why are these working moms making so many snide remarks about the role of the sahm?


Btw, ladies, thank you for your support, your encouragement and messages have brightened my day :)

This conversation has been closed to further comments

50 Comments

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Tah - posted on 12/01/2010

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I will answer it, because there are preconceived notions on both sides. Working moms are selfish and jealous, sahms are lazy. I am sure there is some truth to it in some cases. I never say all. I know not all sahms feel that way, but when you open a thread and the first 5 answers say it, and thats not the first time you have read it, it can make you wonder. Maybe that is why they said it on that thread, but that is not how all of the threads start out with the sahm vs working moms threads. Maybe it's the scorpio in me that makes me passionate about what i believe in..or maybe it's the azzie in me(my mom).



I am glad you had support that brightened your day, and i figured that when the same ladies came on attacking me and my motives after our first exchange,i was not unaware, but it is always nice to have someone in your corner,



i say what i mean and i don't lie or try to hide my "personal agenda" everyone who post here has one..to have their questions answered. Mine have been and i am now locking the thread.

Tah - posted on 12/01/2010

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okay, i'll give the baby her pacifier because i am tired tonight. You are right jamie and i am wrong, you are all knowing and you see right through me, how did i ever manage without you pointing these things out to me, my goodness...THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!.. where would Tah be(there she goes again) without your quick wit and snazzy responses..shame on her for starting a conversation and expecting a straight up answer and not an interrogation...this is America after all...



I hope you feel better now since obviously thats what you want....thanks for your answer though...we FINALLY got one, was like pulling teeth...but there it is....Now if we can get back to all the women who actually answered the question without the pre-answer drama....

Jaime - posted on 12/01/2010

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In answer to your question, I don't think that working moms are jealous of SAHM's. I think there are a few people that begrudge the work week; however I'm certain they realize the value in what they are doing for themselves and their family. We all have our gripes, but in the end we all know what we need to do for our families.

Jaime - posted on 12/01/2010

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Does Tah always talk about herself in the third person? And is Tah capable of carrying out a conversation without always getting her back up at the slightest questioning of her motives or perhaps even her stubbornness in understanding that there isn't much of a discussion to be had because she seems to have a personal agenda? I mean, I'm just spit-balling here...

Tah - posted on 12/01/2010

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also..only 2-3 people tried to get clarification and out of what..43 post..but hey, if you don't have an answer for it, please feel free to post somewhere else. This isn't a post to question Tah to death..it was to answer Tah's question..I don't go on people's post and hound them to death because i think they aren't giving the whole story or have other motives, i answer if i have one..and if not..i move on...

Tah - posted on 12/01/2010

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no Jaime..i don't know..i don't know if it is because people are telling them they are jealous, if they are making assumptions...if it is something within the person...but thanks anyway...

Jaime - posted on 12/01/2010

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But if it's being said over and over in several threads, then I'm willing to bet that you already know why and this thread is directed more so at that one person that called you jealous. I am all for a discussion, but this doesn't seem to be much of a discussion and more so people trying to gain clarification of why you even posted this question.

Tah - posted on 12/01/2010

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okay, the name of the thread is "getting looked down upon" or "on"..anyway..the first 5-6 post had people being jealous, of course the thread has grown, but it was just like every answer i read had jealous in it..so i posted there, then i posted started this thread..so if there aren't that many threads and most of them are saying that, it made me curious. I have also seen it said in young moms and military spouses before so i thought this school of thought must be more widespread then i thought and why do people feel this way...so i know that people are saying "one mom said it to you tah, so why the big deal?..NO...it is being said over and over to and about many people and it made me curious as to why...

Nikkole - posted on 12/01/2010

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I don't think people are jealous of me being a stay at home mom i just think some people say things to make you rethink your decisions or they envy you like someone else stated! I love being a SAHM and i feel that if i work i cant give 110% to my kids and i dont like that i always want to give all i can to whatever im doing! I do try to make a little money by making things and selling them like blankets,hair bows, decaled tshirts or totes! And Right now i have NO ONE to watch my kids and i dont want to work and then have my WHOLE paycheck going to day care theres no point in that but i have people say im lazy becuase i stay at home but I AM the oppostie of lazy lol i get up at 6am go to bed at 1am and i take care of the house and kids ALL DAY! But i like your honesty and passion keep it up :)

Tah - posted on 12/01/2010

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@Bonnie...i actually never assume anything. Esp on COM..i don't know if someone will say "hecks yeah working moms are jealous because i rock"..and if they do, then they do..now i didn't post this because someone said it to me..i was reading a post on here..i'll look at it and come back and tell you all the exact name of it so that you all can see what i mean, when response after response started with "they are just jealous"..if i posted it because one person said it to me i would have posted this weeks ago...lol..i posted ot here because this is where i saw response after response telling the OP on the thread that people were just jealous that she can stay at home. I just threw mine in as another example...it wasn't the reason, when i want to know, i go to the source...i don't ask my brother what my husband wants..i ask my husband...lol...where else would i ask this?...lol

@Jodi..yes i did...and thats why the husband is out getting me another box now.."fruit and yogurt honey, better coming back the other way"..lol

Jo - posted on 12/01/2010

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I have a silly lil question... there's been about a dozen posts here where people have said that there are some working moms who are jealous... so I'm just curious if you did barf up your Special K? :p

Jaime - posted on 12/01/2010

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Tah, if it was just ONE SAHM that implied you were jealous of them, why worry about it?

Bonnie - posted on 12/01/2010

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Tah, I am not offended. I am glad you are being honest with what you believe, but like a few others, I am unsure why you are doing it here? You know which way the answers are going to sway. There are some moms that can not even have a thought about staying home because it is not for them. No I don't think people are jealous of me because I stay home, they might look at me in a different way which I wish they wouldn't because SAHMs are just like any other mom. Not too long ago I had someone say to me, "gosh don't you get bored staying at home?" I said no and she gave me this look as if she thought I was lying. She has no idea how my routine goes on a daily basis, yet she thought I was lying lol. Then another time, I was having a bad day and someone said to me, "well, maybe if you get a part time job you will feel better." I couldn't believe it. Some people need to get off their high horse and let people live their lives.

Tah - posted on 12/01/2010

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i have received some encouraging PMs from some of the sahms on here and request to re-open the thread. I do not want this to go anywhere it doesn't have to go. I apologize if anyone is offended by my honesty or passion, but it is how i am. I asked a question because i was really curious, I wish we could all just support each other, in a perfect world.....let's stay on topic please..thank you...

[deleted account]

I think you have to distinguish between jealousy and envy. I've had some working moms mention that they would love to be able to stay home.....but they simply didn't want to give up the extra money; or whatever other personal reason. I've had many admit that they couldn't handle staying home all day with kids. They weren't mean, condescending, rude, or negative in any other way. They were just expressing that they were envious of my situation. In that circumstance it is just two moms ---- both hard-working --- commenting on their lives. I've also encountered the ones who say snidely "must be nice to be able to afford to stay home.", or some such comment. I don't think you need a psychology degree to catch the negative tone of their comment. Clearly, they have some kind of problem with my stay at home situation. Whether it is specifically jealousy....I couldn't say for sure. But one thing I do know for sure, if as a working mom (or any kind of mom for that matter) you feel the need to make any kind of negative comment towards another mothers' (SAHM or not) personal decision, well, I could only conclude you are probably not content in your own personal situation. Because that's what we do when we are not content......we bring others down to our level. Misery loves company. Regardless, while they may be a bit of a downer in your day, they don't affect my life in any significant manner. Why? Because I AM content with my situation. I'm broke, often exhausted, sometimes frustrated.....but then again, I was when I was working too. That's what I call life. So no matter what Your Life situation is AND since anyone who is raising children has a tough job .....how about we just give all moms' a break and stop the in-fighting? Really, it does not look good on us. not at all.

Tah - posted on 12/01/2010

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@dana mak..i saw that thread when it was started, but thanks anywho. So when SOME..let me be clear, SOME sahms say things like working moms are jealous, aren't doing whats right for their family, are allowing daycare to raise their children, which i see across many communities..they aren't being hostile, or have a chip on their shoulder? but when i respond saying that i have been both and don't agree with it and point out that it can make a working mom feel attacked or guilty, then i am hostile?..hmm one way street much? so i should be less vocal about it then?....also Dana mak..i direct you to the answer i gave Loureen, since you have the same question as she. no reason for me to answer the same question twice. Also, i would come here alot and read the post but wasn't sure if i was allowed to join because i do work at times but i thought there were good topics..my official status at work..PRN...meaning i work when i am needed, not full-time, or part-time. So weeks ago when a mother posted on here who works and who is solely a stay at home mom..and some moms did work outside the home i thought i would be welcomed here..so i joined, so i didn't just join yesterday for scandal...I commented on a couple post, and this is the first i've started, but Obviously i am not welcomed here because i have to justify why i joined. most of time when you start a comment or question with i mean no disrespect, you know it will be disrespectful. Anyone can be passionate about whatever they like, but only certain people are called on it. Again, i appreciate the answers.

now, this thread wasn't started to be disrespectful to any sahms...I belong to many communities, like working moms, and moms say all the time, "i stay home...." and noone ask them why they joined since they don't work, moms with wonderful husbands..many post start with "my SO or fiancee....i am still yet to read any member call a member out saying join after the wedding or join moms with wonderful partners. wow..just wow...

Thank all you women who looked past that and answered honestly....

Leah - posted on 12/01/2010

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I understand what you mean. I don't think they are jealous of them,maybe some working mothers wish they could be sahms but know that they are helping with the extra income and they miss staying at home with baby. I don't think any working mom should be jealous of sahms or the other way around. As much as I love being a sahm, I do miss the extra income but I have no way of going out to work. I will be babysitting soon at home so I guess I am lucky to say that I will be making money AND still be able to stay at home with my son.



I think some sahms wish they could make some money to help the financial situation and some working moms wish they could stay at home to be with the kids.



I do not envy any mother who works.

Isobel - posted on 12/01/2010

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I think a lot of working moms wish they could stay home...I know I've hear MANY say that on com.

That doesn't mean they think you are one of them...then again, maybe your hostility towards them leads them to search for a reason for you to be so passionate about this particular topic.

Tah - posted on 12/01/2010

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@Kelly. i don't address or respond to you so go ahead and take my lead...but just to clear it up because obvioulsy you are still confused. I don't have to agree with a husband taking his sick days to use for his wife, you ask a question on DM and you get different responses. Nothing i said was rude, you just took it that way because obviously you feel some type of way about your choices. Not the other way around. All i was saying is that being a sahm doesn't allow for sick days like a regular job so in order to get the benefits that an outside job provides you would have to get one. If you are very ill..of course he can help out, but for little illnesses, no. Now, I work MORE during the holidays,is what i said, because we throw parties and have birthdays ..etc., i don't like messing with the savings unless it is really needed. i use the money that comes in from my job for those occassions and he can continue to pay bills etc. I work at all because i LOVE HELPING PEOPLE. Even ones who are rude and condescending, so if you came to my floor i would still be nice to you and help you. Your comment was well..."snarky"..to quote one of the other moms, who also didn't get why you responded the way you did. "i'm jealous because i can't afford to be a sahm"..was any of it true..NOPE..was it offensive and out of left field since i was talking in general."YEP" I won't quote the others who sent me PMs about your attitude and cyber hi-fives because you had offended them on countless threads and pms as well...i'll keep that between us.



Now...i started this because on another thread here...a sahm was being belittled for her choice by family and with so many of the responses starting with "they are just jealous"..and having heard it from you, and having seen it in said in other communities across the board. I asked the question. If i want to add my personal experience in, well that is also my right. Also, noone on here knew it was you that said it..until you came on here trying to do what exactly?..well anywho. You have said what you have to say, and i have said what i have to say, and hopefully, we don't have to talk again...blessings.



@Jodi...im not saying all sahms, though i see it quite often on here, i just didn't title it "for some sahms"..lol. I just wanted to get the point of view of sahms...



@loureen, because i am both. If i don't want to work for a month i don't. I stay home, run kids to and from, keep rylan here with me some days, but take him to school a few days to see his friends, etc. When i am in school full time(which is often, just not this semester) i hardly work at all, a couple days a week if that. There are moms on here that work also, there was a post on here asking if some moms worked or were solely sahms and since some did work, from home and otherwise, it seemed i was in good company, so i joined, but if that's not the case, i can move on. I ask anything that makes me curious, if it matters or not, some stuff it for conversation sake, some stuff is general curiosity.

Lady Heather - posted on 11/30/2010

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I have a couple of friends who genuinely are jealous and I have other friends who say you couldn't pay them enough to go back to staying at home. It all depends on the person.

Jealousy isn't really a terrible thing unless you let it get the better of you. We all feel it from time to time for some reason so I don't see it as me being nasty if I say a friend is jealous of my situation. She's told me she is herself! It's certainly not right to assume everyone is envious though.

Question though - what other reason would there be for someone looking down on a SAHM? I can't say I've ever encountered this, but apparently it happens. I'm not sure how many other reasons there are to think less of a mom who doesn't work. Just plain nastiness? Superiority complex?

Christina - posted on 11/30/2010

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I have also been both and it doesnt matter if i work people say i am a horrible jelouse mom that neglects her children but if i stay at home i am a lazy woman that apparently does nothing all day... so i just ignore what other people say because for the most part people are to judgemental and dont take time to know me or whats real... it makes me mad sometimes but i cant care i know that no matter what if i am working or not that i am doing whats best for my kids and thats all that matters!

Jodi - posted on 11/30/2010

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I guess personally, I don't think working moms are *jealous* perse, but I hear a lot from working moms about how they wish they could stay home. Some do, some don't...whatever. I just find it kind of funny that you're upset about a generalization a few SAHM's have made and in turn generalized all SAHM's to think that working moms are jealous of "us". lol
I guess I don't understand 100% choosing to go back to work if you're financially capable of staying home, but I dno't have to understand it to accept it and I don't think less of anyone who does. Ya do watcha gotta do right? lol Anyways, I don't know any SAHM's (of my personal "real life" friends, I don't know any SAHM's on here well enough to say.) that think working moms are jealous, and THOSE are the people that I actually listen to (no offense COM moms! lol) and turn to first. Take things people say (on here and in RL) with a grain of salt!

Stifler's - posted on 11/30/2010

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I'm jealous of working mums. But it's not worth me going back to work to make $60 a week after day care. And then spend it on uniforms and fuel to drive to work etc.

I have no idea why working mums would be jealous. Being a SAHM is boring.

Bonnie - posted on 11/30/2010

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I can't believe that someone said that to you, not even knowing you personally. I don't tend to think it is a jealousy issue. I think all moms do what they feel they can/have to do. If a family lives well above their means, well then yes, the mother will likely have to work no matter what to accommodate their expenses. I know of some moms who would never be caught dead staying at home. It's just not for them and having to look for a new job and having 3 weeks off at home was very stressful to them. I say to each their own. Whether a mom works or not it doesn't make her any better...as long as she still is able to give time and love to her children.

Tah - posted on 11/30/2010

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now see, i have read alot of post from sahms that say they are going stir crazy, or miss the extra money/financial freedom, adult conversation etc but i wouldn't just assume that all sahms are jealous of working moms. I think alot of times the way it comes off can make a working mom feel pretty bad about her choices. I work a lot during the holiday season because starting in september, the b-days start rolling in one after another mixed in with holidays and it doesn't stop until our anniversay on january 9th, lol

I mean literally with no exaggeration, we host at least 5 b-day parties ( bowling, chuck e cheese, movie tavern parties for the kids then always ending with a family dinner that weekend), thanksgiving, xmas and new years at our house from oct-jan and then other family members have their parties here because we have the room, So i pick up hours so that everyone can get what they want and need and we can end it all with a nice get-a-way for our anniversary. i like to get my husband exactly what he wants and he has expensive taste..but he earns it..lol



When i say i am both i mean, i have literally been the full-time sahm for my daughter when i was engaged to her dad and then to my youngest, both when my husband was deployed and when he was home. Now i make my schedule around my children, i work nights so that i am there when they wake up, can get them off to school and then i can be there when they arrive home and we can work on projects and i can make sure my husband is not hamburger helping them to pizza overload every night so i cook...lol. I also do my school schedule around them, no classes until 9am and they have to end by 2-3, so that we can do activities, and if i can get away with some onlines, then i will def. do that lol. I love doing both, it's a good balance. My mom was both, she ran a daycare and a hair salon from home while raising 10 children and my dad worked 3 jobs until he got out of school and got a really good one, then my mom went to work outside the home, so i also grew up with both and i guess we do what we know...

Katherine - posted on 11/30/2010

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I think that it is really horibble for someone to say something like that to you. I don't think a stay at home mom is better than a working mom. I think there is one category and that's a good mom. Whether you stay at home or not doesn't determine whether you're a good mom or that. I can't stand those arguments.

[deleted account]

Well, I've had working moms tell me that to my face. I understand that a lot of women want to work, so not all working moms are jealous of SAHMs. In fact, I'm not really "jealous" per say, but more in awe of the amazing working moms out there. But I'm glad I don't have to work. ;)

Linda - posted on 11/30/2010

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I think it is a "grass is always greener" thing. I have been both and each has it's ups and downs. So maybe it's just jealousy for the perks.

Heather - posted on 11/30/2010

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I have nooo clue! Im not only a sahm, but work part time on the weekends while my hubby is home with our son.... I often wish that I didn't have to work, and could be just a sahm.... And I have to admit, I do kinda envy my friend who is only a sahm.. But not jealous. It's a lot of work to be a sahm.. And you can't just leave and forget about it. Not to mention there isn't any pay. But actually being jealous? I don't get that at all.

Jo - posted on 11/30/2010

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Vanessa, I'd say, you're a mom that also works out of the house a couple nights a week lol so to abbreviate... you're a MTAWOOHACNAW haha I'll just call you and the moms who are MTAWOOHACNAW's... I'll call you sneezes!



And I'll say bless you too :p

[deleted account]

I think if you're only working a few nights a month then you're a SAHM. I'm really not big on labels though. Only reason I label myself a SAHM is because it would be a pain in the ass to say "stay at home mom" all the time lol But really, we're moms, whether we work or not. We love our kids and do our best to raise them to be productive and decent human beings.

Vanessa - posted on 11/30/2010

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I asked this question on another thread and no one answered me. I quit my full time job when I had my son and now am going to be working a few nights out of the month to keep a feeling of independence and a little extra income. so does this make me a working mom or a stay at home mom because i am home more then I will be working?? as far as the jealousy issue I do know a few moms that would rather stay home then work but they tell me they are happy that I am able to stay home and they wish they could too.

Jo - posted on 11/30/2010

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I think it's kinda what Joy said - it's the 'easy' pat-myself-on-the-back response to make someone feel better about their own insecurities.



I've had a few working moms tell me that I am very lucky to be able to stay home, I've had a few tell me that they are jealous that I get to stay home, my man has even had a few tell him that I am lucky that he works so hard so I can stay home...



I think that's completely different though. Those women were saying their own feelings. I don't AUTOMATICALLY assume that all working moms feel the same way though -- I've generally learned not to assume what other people are thinking/feeling though. Which is something A LOT of women on this site are incapable of.



On sites like this - feeling 'better than' or 'superior to' another mom seems to be something some moms strive to feel. Rather than being an intelligent woman using common sense and consideration, they just want to be [and in some cases NEED to be] one step above any mom that they see a reflection of themselves in.



My guess is, you (Tah) represent a part of her life that she is questioning. You made her feel insecure about something within herself with your post (or multiple posts) so she lashed out. Some people do it by claiming that you're jealous, other people do it by claiming that you're stupid, other poeple do it by claiming that your reading skills are crap and you misunderstood them... and some people just can't think of anything else to say that makes sense, so they just spew verbal diarreah hoping they make you flinch.

Laura - posted on 11/30/2010

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Exactly, I know sometimes there are times I miss having more adult conversation, and I miss being able to buy the things I WANT cuz we don't have the extra income but would I ever give it up, HELL NO!! I'll live with out my indulgences to be able to spend time with my kids.

[deleted account]

I think we can all find things we envy about people in other walks of life. I know every time I turn on my tv and see some rich person spending a million dollars or more on a vacation home in the bahamas (yeah, I watch a lot of HGTV lol), I get envious BIG TIME lol

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 11/30/2010

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There are moms like you Tah are the exception, knowing both worlds…and then there are mothers who only know the world of WORK, work, WORK…and some of them would like to stay home more, if not permanently and be with the kids….

I have had people tell me (The ones that have only worked) that they wish they could stay home and be a “Housewife”

And in a way they do envy

Tah - posted on 11/30/2010

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i was reading through the other post on here where a mom was saying that her family looked down on her for being a sahm, and almost every response started with, "they are just jealous"...i was thinking really...you all could not think that. I know that working moms and sahms have their own set of pre-conceived notions about the other, but alot of sahms always say that daycare is raising their children, or like you said they are selfish, their children cry for them all day at daycare..etc and blah blah, and i think it almost discourages some moms who want to or need to work or aren't happy as a sahm, making them think there is something wrong with their choice. i see it throughout the communities so i figured who better to answer than a community of sahms..lol

Laura - posted on 11/30/2010

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I know a few people who have told me that they are jealous that I can be a SAHM because they would love to and simply can't afford it. However, I would never assume that some one who is working would rather stay at home and are jealous of me. My mother could have stayed at home but she loves her job(teacher) and when we were in school she got to see us every day anyway.
I think some people are very narrow minded. Some one had said a couple of weeks ago that any mom who worked is selfish and doesn't really care about their kids, that made me very angry because I was a working mom until about 6 months ago.

I think it boils down to the fact that there are some people that think their way to do everything is the best way and anyone who does it different is either wrong or wishing they could be that way. Some people don't realize there is more that one way to raise a child and be a wonderful parent.

Not all of us think that working moms are jealous, it's just some of the more narrow minded ones are more vocal :)

Tah - posted on 11/30/2010

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thank you joy..she took something i said personal..which wasn't even directed at her personally and told me i was jealous that i couldn't afford to stay home blah blah blah...okay...since you know so much about me..lol. she actually made me mad enough to cuss which i did..lol..and got my response deleted..lol. we can afford it, my husband would love it, but you are right, i love what i do.



and yes, i always thought that was something people said to jusitfy what they were feeling....thats a good way to phrase it...lol...

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Plus, isn't that always sort of a stock high school girl answer? Girls in school used to make fun of my red hair. My aunt would tell me it was because they were jealous. In high school I had a girl pin me up against the wall and tell me to stay away from her boyfriend (he had said hello to me once in the halls). When I shoved her accross the room and told her to keep her hands off me, the only clever thing she could come up with to say was "You're just jealous!" Lame.

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I think that some working moms are a little jealous of SAHMs and I also think some SAHM's are a little jealous of working moms. Lots of people tend to think the grass is greener on the other side of the fence when, in reality, we all just need to tend to our own yards. I don't think you're jealous Tah. From the posts of yours that I read, you seem very happy with what you do. Whoever posted that about you, either she is making wide, sweeping generalizations (which are never true) or she simply wasn't thinking before she spoke / typed. Or she's just plain bitchy and needs to take a chill pill. Whichever lol

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