He doesn't use words! Help!

Liana - posted on 02/03/2009

I think you are right to be concerned and you need to get your partner to talk to the childs mother.  It might be that he needs speech therapy or he may have hearing difficulties so he's not learning sounds like most kids his age.  However it may be somthing more serious one of my friends little boys was doing a similar thing and they did allsorts of test and found he had mild autism. However with him there were some other signs if it is just his speech it is probably something simpler.

Amber - posted on 02/02/2009

Quoting Missy:

He does seem to have a problem, but if you only have him on the weekends I really don't know what you can do.  You would have to get your husband to take control of getting him the help he needs since he is your stepson.

 

I do think he has a problem. I worked in a daycare for 2 years and I have my cda in early childhood development. He should be using a lot more words and he should be talking in 2-4 word scentences and he is not. My husband would love to be able to "take control" of the sistuation, but he is not able to since he is deployed. I love this little boy like he were my own and I think I have every right to be concerned about him and want to get him help. I used to have my step-son full-time since he was 6 months old. Then when he started calling me "mommy' his mother got upset and put him in daycare full-time so he would be away from me. He doesn't even call his own mother "mom". She only works 4 days a week and two of those days are a saturday and sunday, but my step-son is still in daycare every single day weather she is working or not. It's upsetting that she doesn't not want to spend anytime with her son.

Amber - posted on 02/02/2009

Quoting Sylvia:

Do the children on base go to the local public school?  If so, I would contact the school district's Early Childhood Program, Parents As Teachers.  A 3 year old screening can be done to identify any developmental delays.  If delays are idenfied, then he will qualify for FREE programs, like Preshcool, Speech Therapy, Occupational Therapy and many other wonderful things.  Statistically speaking, the early issues are diagnosed the better the recovery.  My youngest son was diagnosed with Autism-PDDNOS-at 3 yr 8 months.  Now at 18, he has been on the honor roll, he works, and he is about to get his driver's license.  Since this is your military husband's son-contact the family support counselor to assist in this matter for the sake of the boy, his father (your hubby) and the boy's Mother who is too influenced by her own issues to really see that you LOVE her child and want the best for him. Good luck.

 

We do not live on an army post yet. My husband is only national gurad, but once he gets home he is transfering to active duty. Once he does this we will only see my step son 6 weeks out of the year and one weekend a month. That is why i'm trying to get him the help he needs now before we do end up moving to another state. My daughter is 7 months and I have her in parents as teachers and they are wonderful! They told me that I could put my step son in pat while he is at my house, but they do not come to the house on weekends and that is the only time I have him. My step son lives 45 minutes away when he is with his mother. They gave me the phone number for pat where he lives and I gave it to his mother, but she told me she didn't want to put him in pat because she is "just too busy".

Sylvia - posted on 02/01/2009

Do the children on base go to the local public school?  If so, I would contact the school district's Early Childhood Program, Parents As Teachers.  A 3 year old screening can be done to identify any developmental delays.  If delays are idenfied, then he will qualify for FREE programs, like Preshcool, Speech Therapy, Occupational Therapy and many other wonderful things.  Statistically speaking, the early issues are diagnosed the better the recovery.  My youngest son was diagnosed with Autism-PDDNOS-at 3 yr 8 months.  Now at 18, he has been on the honor roll, he works, and he is about to get his driver's license.  Since this is your military husband's son-contact the family support counselor to assist in this matter for the sake of the boy, his father (your hubby) and the boy's Mother who is too influenced by her own issues to really see that you LOVE her child and want the best for him. Good luck.

Amanda - posted on 02/01/2009

My son didn't talk until he was over 2 and a half, and his pediatrician was concerned about him. Talk to your step-son's doctor, if you can, and see if he or she will get a referral to whatever local agency is in your area. In my area the school districts will screen children who are referred as early as age 2.5--which is how my son is now getting speech therapy and finally talking. Also look into if any local universities have a speech undergrad or graduate program. Some of them provide a speech clinic at a much lower cost, or free, for their students to practice their skills. Trust your instincts, and do whatever you can for him. Good luck!

Missy - posted on 02/01/2009

He does seem to have a problem, but if you only have him on the weekends I really don't know what you can do.  You would have to get your husband to take control of getting him the help he needs since he is your stepson.

Christine - posted on 02/01/2009

My son is 2 and in speech therapy for a generic speech delay - not uncommon and nothing to worry about as long as the child gets speech therapy.  I do think it sounds like this little boy should at least be evaluated - the earlier the intervention the quicker and easier to get the child caught up.  In our area there is a county program that coordinates services and provides therapy in the child's home on a sliding scale fee, I think these services are fairly consistent across the country.  Good luck,

Christine

Amber - posted on 02/01/2009

He talks like this all the time, not just when he is at my house. I used to have him 5 days a week until he started calling me "mommy". His mom didn't like it and so she put him in daycare. She is aware of the way he talks, but she said she doesn't see anything wrong with it. I worked in a daycare for 2  years and I also have my cda in early childhood development so I know he should be talking more then he is. It's just hard to get him the proper help with my husband gone right now and his mother not wanting to get help for him.

Kathy - posted on 02/01/2009

The big question is, does he speak like this all the time or only when he's at your home? If he speaks like this all the time, you're right to be concerned. At three his vocabulary should be much greater than what you are describing. He may benefit from seeing a speech therapist but I suspect that you'll encounter resistance from his mother. When will your husband be home? In the meantime, keep loving him as you do, encourage him to use the words he does use. Talk to him as you go about your daily routine and he may start to use more words. Share your concerns with your husband when he gets home and get some professional help before he starts school.

Rose - posted on 02/01/2009

well,amber...you seems to be a caring stepmom, I respect you for that because there's not many stepmom out there who cared much for their stepchildren...I dont want to make you feel uneasy or trying to make you effortless,but i think you should give your stepson some time,when my 2nd daughter was 3,she's too talked the way your stepson did..but now she's almost 4,she doesn't talk like that anymore,she has improved so much..the thing is you just give him time to learn and at the same time teach him how to..it doesn't matter if you've only spend not much time with him,it's the quality that's count,not the quantity..good luck,may god bless you.