HELP! How did you get your lil boy to poop in the potty?

Candice - posted on 03/25/2011 ( 29 moms have responded )

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Keegan is 3 and will go "pee" with out a problem. But for my life and SANITY I can NOT get my lil man to poop in the potty.
I have tried, rewards "when you poop in the potty" Throwing out his big boy undies when he soils them. and Reminding him his big brother, daddy, uncles and grandpa's don't go in their pants. I am at a loss. HELP

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Correina - posted on 04/09/2012

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showed him videos of poopin off you tube like potty dance and i think there was one about elmo or somethin on the toilet, it was a ridiculous suggestion from a friend but it worked two hours later he went straight to the toilet not the potty and pooped for the first time all on his own i was sooo proud!

Jenny - posted on 03/25/2011

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Take away all of the pressure!! Pretend it doesn't matter at all. Decide to give trying a brake for at least a week, try and forget if you have a deadline you want him to be trained by.



If it's hot weather, just let him run around the house with noting on the bottom, but with access to potty or toilet where he can go there without your help.



When i did this with my 2 year old, he just surprised me and went on his own.

Melissa - posted on 04/13/2011

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That was a fun one but what worked best for my little guy was only having him wear a shirt and nothing else and he couldn't/wouldn't poop anywhere except the toilet. He would ask for his pullup when he had to poop and I would just calming say oh you have to poop lets run to the bathroom...I'm going to get their faster then my Big Boy! i would make it fun and he would forget about what he was doing!

Rebecca - posted on 04/07/2011

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My son will be 4 in June. He was very stubborn through the whole potty training thing and even told us at some point that it was just "easier" for us to have to change his diapers! Eventually, he wanted to start wearing all the cool underpants that his grandma had bought him, but when he felt the urge to goo poo he would ask for a diaper on...talk about frustrating! To try to convince (bribe) him we said "If you sit on the potty and go poo, you can play your DSi while you go." And that was basically the only time at home he was allowed to play it. I think the key is finding the one thing that calls to "them" as individuals...and the fact that they are people and the will to decide when its their time.

Kelly - posted on 03/31/2011

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These tips are good, the problem I have is my son isnt dry at night, so has a nappy on for bed. He waits till I put his nappy on and he goes to bed to poo. Or he does it as soon as he wakes in the morning. He holds it in!! I know this sounds disgusting but we have even shown him our poos in the toilet....still not helped!!
All I am doing at the minute is hoping he realises it doesnt feel nice. Hes gettin a new bed soon, so Im going to try him at nights without a nappy, maybe then he will try the toilet or I can try the self cleaning. Thanks tho

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Autumn - posted on 04/06/2012

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Ok I'm a new PT mama...and my son went poo poo on the potty today...first day...what seemed to work for him was I let him have privacy...he would say mama out and shut the bathroom door for both pee pee nad poo poo. And I would let him have his space. I said nothing about trying to go poo poo...just pee pee and let him run around naked all day...it might have just been a one time thing...but I would try and let him have privacy. Good luck!!

Jessica - posted on 04/07/2011

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My little man was 31/2 when he finally decided it was time to go both number 1 and 2 in the potty...We got him a "special" toy that he only got to play with on the potty...we got play dough and had a tv tray and we would play for a little while and while he was relaxed and really not thinking about it he would go! We found that with both our kids the "special" toy that they got to play with was what saved us and things were learned pretty fast!

Stacy - posted on 04/06/2011

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I have the same problem with my son who is going to be 3 in August. I have tried everything. When or if you find the answer, please let me know. I feel like I'm doing something wrong.

Ginger - posted on 04/05/2011

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I'm having similar problems. My 3yr. 4mo. son is adament that he does NOT want to use the potty or toilet at all. He's very stubborn and throws a huge fit everytime I make him try. So, I've tried giving it a break completely for a week or a month; that didn't help. I've tried many different reward charts, M & M's candy rewards, stickers both for him & a chart, big potty celebrations, cheerios in the toilet for target practice, peeing outside (write in the dirt, pee on ants, pee next to Daddy), big boy underpants, pull-ups, etc., etc. My husband made a deal with him that if he peed & pooped 5 times he could have a much desired $40 toy that we bought, left in the box on the top shelf in the bathroom as incentive. That didn't work either; he tells me to "take it back to the store" he doesn't want it. Telling him big boys use the toilet & babys go in diapers doesn't phase him either. I also have an 18 month old son who is willing to sit on the potty & has been successful several times. I thought the competition with his little brother would help, but he doesn't care. It's so frustrating; but at least if I can get the baby potty trained I'll only have the 3yr. old in diapers! :)

Krystyna - posted on 04/01/2011

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My youngest only pooped when he had the whole bathroom and privacy to himself. He still closes the door, does his thing quietly and in private, and then calls me when he's done to wipe him. Maybe if your son was more relaxed and didnt feel so much pressure to "go" he would be OK. Ask him if he wants to go by himself like a big boy and if he wants you to close the door so nobody is watching him. I'm not sure what exactly the answer is but everyone has great advice and ideas. Don't loose your sanity or stress over it. He will really go when he is good and ready. Good luck!

Tina - posted on 04/01/2011

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what i did was when they want in the dipper take tham to the bathroom show tham were it gose

Candice - posted on 03/31/2011

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My MIL informed me that she made my husband clean his soiled undies in the toliet (*shudders* ewww) BUT if it has worked I think I am going to have to try that. Keegan has never had a "normal" poo schedual. So watching for that doesn't really help.... I think I am going to try the bubbles while he sits first, then make him scrub? Idk....

Thank you all ladies. It's nice to know that I am not alone in this craziness that is boy!

Sarah - posted on 03/31/2011

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my youngest actually was poop trained before he was pee trained!! From the time he was a baby, I could tell he was pooping, I could see the tension in his face as he pooped. When we were potty training I watched him closely...as soon as I saw the tension in his face, I scooped him up and took him to the bathroom and put him on the potty. When he was old enough to go by himself, I would tell him to go...after a few months, all I had to do was point in that direction and he would run off to go. There were times that only one tiny poop ended up in the potty, and the rest was in his pull-up...and I remember one day pulling down his pants and finding a poop 90% out, but in the end, he finished on the potty! He is now 5.5 years old, and I cannot remember the last time he pooped his pants. He very rarely pees his pants, but if he does, it is because he fell asleep when he had to go.

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I used a harsh method to break my 3 boys (and one girl out of 3). Once I knew that they understood "poo" goes in the toilet, if they soiled their underpants, THEY had to clean them out. They used the toilet to do so (clean water of course). They would then hang the over the side of the tub and I would scrub their hands clean for them. I always carried extra underpants with me and baggies for when we were not at home.
I haven't read anything that the other mothers have posted...
But another helpful hint is (if you don't know already) learn his "poo schedule". When it is close to time, have him sit on the toilet (or training potty) until he goes. When he does, have a party for going in the toilet! (It worked at first with the difficult ones, and the two who haven't used the "clean-it-yourself" method!)
My sister took two weeks off of extra activities to train her son. He had to clean his "messes" as well, because she knew that my method worked. She trained our brothers daughter the same way...
Good Luck!

Yurena - posted on 03/31/2011

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I didn't have so much trouble with my boy but perhaps a sticker chart with a nice treat at the top could do the trick, congratulate him lots when he goes, but don't make a big fuss when he doesn't, just comment by the by 'what a pity you didn't get that sticker to get your treat...'. Also take him with you to the toilet and he can sit on the potty as you go to the loo and have a little chat relaxed-this is crucial, or check a special book you keep just there. Would he prefer a 'big people's' toilet instead of the potty?

Maryka - posted on 03/31/2011

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I did this with both my children (boy and girl), and it worked like a bom, although it sounds disgusting.... They went to the loo/potty for a wee, no problem, but wouldn't poo in it. And cleaning their undies (for me), was far worse than cleaning a nappy....

So, I simply stopped putting on their underwear. They did it in their pants only two or three times, and then started going to the loo/potty. (no one will like the feeling of poo running down their legs).

Good luck to all the struggling mums.

Kelly - posted on 03/30/2011

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Exactly the same problem!! My son is 3 years 5 months. Hes great at weeing on the toilet, he wont use his potty anymore, and stands like his daddy to wee on the toilet. But pooing is a problem. He still has a nappy on for bedtime, so he usually waits till then to poo. If hes desperate during the day he will cry for a nappy on!! Ive just been advised to put the nappy on, but make him sit on the potty/toilet when pooing. Apparently its because they have to sit to poo and they arent used to that. Once he has sat an pooed in a nappy a couple of times to then put the nappy in the bottom of the potty, an get him to sit an poo, then remove the nappy completely. Im working on this as he waits till he is in bed then poos. He doesnt soil his underwear tho. But to be honest I havent made a big deal of this, he will do it when he is ready.

Kelly - posted on 03/30/2011

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Exactly the same problem!! My son is 3 years 5 months. Hes great at weeing on the toilet, he wont use his potty anymore, and stands like his daddy to wee on the toilet. But pooing is a problem. He still has a nappy on for bedtime, so he usually waits till then to poo. If hes desperate during the day he will cry for a nappy on!! Ive just been advised to put the nappy on, but make him sit on the potty/toilet when pooing. Apparently its because they have to sit to poo and they arent used to that. Once he has sat an pooed in a nappy a couple of times to then put the nappy in the bottom of the potty, an get him to sit an poo, then remove the nappy completely. Im working on this as he waits till he is in bed then poos. He doesnt soil his underwear tho. But to be honest I havent made a big deal of this, he will do it when he is ready.

Mandie - posted on 03/30/2011

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My son usually holds it in...which isnt good!!!! so i explain the best i can that if his tummy hurts that he needs to tell me that he has to go, and that i will give him a treat after he does so, and when he does..sometimes he is scared, and wont go, so i make him sit there until he does, he does cry sometimes but after hes done hes soo happy and proud and i give him lots of praise and hugs and tell him hes a such a big boy! :) but all kids are different...Good Luck with your little one! :)

Michele - posted on 03/30/2011

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my oldest took 6 months to poop in the potty! Just be consistent and don't go back to diapers or pullups and tell him he is a big boy and we use underwear. Boys are harder and they are sometimes afraid to poop in the potty. it is normal. My second boy trained great and my third boy just trained 2 months ago ( he is 3 1/2). He took about 2-3 weeks before he would consistently poop in the potty. make a really big deal about it when he does and keep positive praise. getting mad makes it worse! Just keep emphasizing that he is a big boy and big boys poop and pee in the potty and not their underwear. stay calm and encouraging and I promise it will happen - even though it seems like forever. good luck, they are all different.

Steph - posted on 03/30/2011

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I truely understand ur frustration, as we're exactly the same !! He will go on poo on the toilet & we are full of praise, we to have tried everything. He still prefers to poo his pants, he even takes them off & emptys them into the toilet, then shouts us to tell us & says its ok I'm a good boy !!
We've been advised just to ignore this dont speak to him just tell him to go get a clean pair of underpants. We've also been advised to sit him on the toilet, & use a pot of bubbles, as he blows he relaxes his bowel.
Hope this makes some sense to you...?! & Best of luck.

Candice - posted on 03/29/2011

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Been there tried that, *sigh* went as far as making him throw away his undies (we were at the YMCA and my husband had left with his bag)

Candice - posted on 03/29/2011

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It's great to hear that someone else is having the same problem. If you find ANY thing that works even alittle PLEASE let me know :)

Alisha - posted on 03/29/2011

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I agree with Jenny. Take away all pressure. Unfortunately for me my son was 4 1/2 before he pooped in the potty =( We too got him to go pee in the potty and he was even wearing underwear but to poop he would cry for a diaper or pull up. When we refused and said no your big boy you have to go in the potty, it didn't work! We tried rewards, sticker chart. Even just holding our ground and being firm. We ended up with a child who would wait days to poop and then get constipated. I actually asked my doctor for advice and she said put the underwear away. I was a little shocked by that since he didn't poop in them. She explained that he needed to come to the decision on his own and when we backed off and let him do that it would happen. So we went home and put the underwear up and explained to him he had to wait until he was fully potty trained (during the day) to wear his underwear again. We did this in a nice tone to. We told him when he wants to he can use the potty to pee or poop. This took one week and he was pooping in the potty. I was blown away and upset that I didn't do it sooner. We as parents have to be careful we don't put our deadlines on our children because their is studies that if they are potty trained before they are ready they can have issues later in childhood (potty related). To Kayla who said she has never seen success with potty training breaks. It's not about saying "okay, you don't have to use the potty anymore let's take a break." Children after being potty trained for months know what your telling and showing them they are supposed to do. It's about them wanting to do it though and not being pushed.There is studies that show that backing off does help the child. Good luck Candice!

Kayla - posted on 03/29/2011

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My son turned 2 in January he is completely potty trained after only two months I did the pullups then said enough put him in undies and there. It's gross but I dumped his poop in the pot from his undies with him watching and told him his poop poop goes here (toilet) not here (undies) only two times and wham potty trained 2 yr old boy. Good luck its worth a shot. But BTW I don't believe In taking a break ots very confusing like taking away a rule then giving it back I've never seen success w potty training breaks.

Shalom - posted on 03/28/2011

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I'll be following this one with great interest- thanks for asking this question, Candice! My daughter is in the same place right now... peepee on the potty, no problem. Poops are totally a different matter, and it's not fun cleaning up the aftermath. We've tried the same tactics as you have, and still no positive results... she still hides under her bed to do her business and announces her little victory when she's done lol.

We're in the same boat, Candice... i'm feeling for you! Looking forward to seeing where this topic goes :)

Shalom - posted on 03/28/2011

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I'll be following this one with great interest- thanks for asking this question, Candice! My daughter is in the same place right now... peepee on the potty, no problem. Poops are totally a different matter, and it's not fun cleaning up the aftermath. We've tried the same tactics as you have, and still no positive results... she still hides under her bed to do her business and announces her little victory when she's done lol.

We're in the same boat, Candice... i'm feeling for you! Looking forward to seeing where this topic goes :)

Candice - posted on 03/25/2011

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He started going pee on his own. He said I'm big like Abby (my neice) But he still refuses to to poo in the toliet. He has a seat and step stool that he uses, although most of the time he climbs up on to the toliet and stands on the rim ( I will say that sight makes me giggle) and he has a sticker chart. He want's to wear his Big Boy undies and not his pull up's and stays dry when he wears them, which is one of the reasons why I am so frustrated that he refuses to poo in the potty...

Vicky - posted on 03/25/2011

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My son was 4 when he started using the toilet for both sides. He did it on his own with encouragement and praise and ignoring accidents. I gave him a smily face chart and put a face on it for sitting, a face plus w for a wee and a face plus w & p for doing both. He loved this and was telling me which one to put on it. one thing I did find was he wouldn't use a potty at all couldn't get comfy so got a toilet seat and a step so he was a big boy. Professionals told me a chiild will only do its toilet training when they are ready not when mum wants them to. I totally agree with that after him but I didn't with my daughter as she trained very easily at age 2. I know how frustrating it is but stop till he is ready, poss use training pants for him to do his poo in for now saves a bit of mess. But most important praise and encourage make it fun he will get there soon. Good luck hope its soon.

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