Hi , I am a mom of two , sharlyn and skyler ...... I am new to circle of mums , I am eager to help other mom but at the same time , I have some problem too , please help me thank you :)

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Merrie - posted on 12/29/2012

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My three year old had this problem the first few times I dropped him off at day care, I only take him to day care one day a week but it was a huge problem. I finally got him to stop by getting there a few minutes earlier than usual. I would walk him in and sit down with him for a few minutes and play. As we were playing I would tell him that I had to leave the room in a few minutes but that I would be back in a few minutes. He doesn't really have an actual sense of time, so even though I left for way more than a few minutes, he was fine and didn't even realize I was gone after the first few minutes that I left.

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Maybe a preschool co-op would work better for her.In co-ops parents are there helping in the class room.This might help her solve her fears.Knowing you can be right there if she needs you.And it might help you too.We used a co-op last year.I am a stay at home Mom so my Jo was always with me.It was much easier for both of us.After awhile she didn't care if I was there or not.

Sarah - posted on 12/01/2012

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I have worked in preschools and daycares. I have been both an aid for teachers and the teacher. From a teacher or aid's point of view, most of us would prefer parents/gaurdians to leave the child screaming and crying. As the parent you can wait out of view until a thumbs up is given, but the more the child sees the parent the more he/she cries. Chances are the child will stop once he/she realizes that the parent is not going to give in. Some of you mommies may thing that I would never do this to my own children. I have. I cried as I was walking away because I could still hear my 1 year old crying "mommy, mommy". I waited at the daycare office for about 10 minutes. The assistant in his room came to me and said he stopped crying after he could no longer see me through the classroom window and that he was now playing with the others.



Now with this being said, I would still agree that there could be something wrong. Someone may be bothering your child or maybe a teacher is not paying attention to her. I would ask the teachers. Call and set a time for a conference. Try to get it in the room that your daughter would normally be in. Take her with you and walk in with her and sit at one of the tables. Let her play with the classroom toys and talk to the teacher too. Maybe she is really shy and strangers scare her. If she knows the teacher and knows that you are good with the teacher maybe she won't cry so much. Also, maybe the teacher has some info that you don't know about. Like another child bothering her or something like that. Take the time to talk with your daughter too. She may be able to let you in on why she don't want to go to school. Try to ask her in passing like while getting ready for bed at night. You may try to find children's books about the first day of school. I know that there are a few out there. Try reading them to her to start a discussion on why she don't like preschool. Good luck and I hope that we were able to help you.

S. - posted on 11/27/2012

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What do the teachers do? Or say? See where I am from the teacher would just take the child and tell you not to worry and go, 99% of the time when you pick them up the child will have calmed down after 5minuets. After a week of this routine the child goes in without a fuss. Also if you took your child home everyday the school welfare would come knocking because the child would be missing out on a education.

Kristen - posted on 11/27/2012

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ouch this is a tough one, for daughter and most importantly YOU. maybe try her (if u haven't already) in a school/ program that's only available for 2 hours or maybe even less in the morning, and that you will pick her up at lunch time to spend the rest of the day with her. this way she has a little sense of how long you two will be apart for. or, try setting up playdates with another little girl from her class outside of school, so that she has another sense of comfort in the classroom besides "mommy". before my daughter started kindergarden, i would get her all hyped up whenever we saw a school bus, reminding her that pretty soon SHE would be the lucky one to ride away on the big yellow bus, while I waited for her to come home and tell me all about what new things she learned, and what new friends she made. definitly keep her in situations where there are a bunch of children playing together -with THEIR mommies mingling with other mommies in the shadows- outside of the regular school activities....and hopefully over time she will learn to understand that it's OKAY to be involved with other safe and fun activities without her mommy right there with her. i do agree with patricia though - 2nd school she's attended or not - maybe someone IS bothering her, or not being as patient with her as a professional should be. maybe she needs to be somewhere with a smaller group of kids, like more one on one time with her and her teacher, or "caretaker." good luck, i hope i was of some help!!

Alicia - posted on 11/27/2012

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I followed her into classroom and explained everything to her but she still refuse to let go if me

Patricia - posted on 11/27/2012

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I personally would spend a few minutes with her and get her interested in something and tell her you love her and will be back at a certain time to get her and leave it at that

S. - posted on 11/27/2012

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If she screams and you bring her back home you are giving her what you want, this is never ever going to stop.

Take her to school hand her to the teacher and go home, don't rise to her,when you pick her up give her treat for staying in school, once she realises that screaming is getting her no were she will stop.

Patricia - posted on 11/27/2012

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Hummmm. I would ask to stay and visit with her. Maybe ween her off of you? Will they allow you to sit somewhere were you will be out of the way, but close enough to observe her? have you talked to the teachers? Maybe they have some suggestions or can distract her? Some children are just not cut out to be away from their parents. I was the same way. The school would call everyday with me crying all day long. It wasn't that the school was bad, but I just missed my Mom. I finally was held back in the 2nd grade and that did the trick. I just needed time to mature.

Alicia - posted on 11/27/2012

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This is the second school she is attending , I changed her school last time because she did not want to go in as well so I am confused about what to do

Patricia - posted on 11/27/2012

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Oh I think I replied to that post. How long has she been going to this preschool? Maybe there is something going on at this place? Have you talked to her? Maybe kids bothering her or she doesn't like the teachers?



have you considered taking her to a different place?

Alicia - posted on 11/27/2012

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My 4 year old daughter refuses to go to school , she screams and cling onto me every morning so I have to bring her back home , I think I am not doing the right thing so what shall I do ?

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