How can I get my 12 month old son to sleep hard at night?

Katie - posted on 10/07/2012

Ok first of all babies cry for a reason. A 1 year old who is whimpering in the middle of the night is upset about something.So called "sleep training" is just another word for ignoring your childs needs. From what I can tell from your last post the problem was he was napping too much during the day and he wasn't eating enough. So letting him cry it out wasn't the answer. I know that all sounds snotty but that is not how I mean it. I tried letting my son cry it out and it didn't work. My Dr. said that baby just wonders why you stopped coming when he cries and can lead to feelings of abandonment. And I know what it is like to be sleep deprived my 4 year old son suffers from autism-related insomnia. He gets up every night and sometimes stays up for hours. Most likely your son was going thru a growth spurt since you said it just started. I think you sound like a great mom but as a mother of 3 I would suggest using the "cry it out method" as a last resort. Going in his room and calming him down is not a bad thing and I think you are right about not picking him up. Keeping binkys in his crib was another great idea. Please don't take anything I said the wrong way. and the bottom line is you have to do what works for you and your family.

Shyann Christa - posted on 09/29/2012

It's ok to let them cry at night no more the. 10 -15 mins if it's jus for his soother then letting him cry it out might. Be the solution and ur Bf needs to grow up and realize that's life and baby's cry ..

Shyann Christa - posted on 09/29/2012

Have a night light in room ,having less naps during day so if he has two naps Try giving him jus one nap and don't let him sleep past 5 pm ,do not pick him up in the middle of night if he starts to cry at night wait a few mins about 5 not to long if he continues go to his room ensure him that u are there don't turn on a bunch of light jus leave night light on go to him touch him kiss him tell him ur there and leave the room . Keep dOing that he may be jus so use to having you attend to him at night and may need to be eased off of that ..but if it's something

More like pain then I'm not sure what to do about that ask your doctor thu would kno more

Dehra - posted on 09/11/2012

Do you have him on a full schedule like you take him to the park everyday and give him a good bath before he goes to bed and then read to him...I know that made a huge difference for me...try that if your not already doing it

Brianne - posted on 09/11/2012

If you think it's just bad dreams, try making sure his feet are uncovered at night. One of my friends told me that it isn't even necessarily a child over-heating that makes them have nightmares, but their feet over-heating! I don't know if that will help you or not, if I make sure my daughters feet are uncovered then she doesn't wake up as much at night.

Kimberly J - posted on 09/11/2012

Your son has you trained not the other way around I had the same problem with my oldest. Also give your boyfriend ear plugs if he can't take the crying. You could also play a cd with rain sounds or ocean music that is soothing and relaxing. Keep him active in the evening make him really tired and then a warm bath before bed to put him to sleep. he will also out grow this and sleep through the night.

Lenise - posted on 09/11/2012

Thanks everyone! He's doing much better. No more interruptions. I cut him down to one nap a day and that's helped a lot. Plus now he doesn't get anymore baby jar food. He's eating everything we eat so I know that's made a huge difference too. Thanks for all your help!

Jill - posted on 09/09/2012

Just take care of him & remember that he's still a baby. Seems like he's easy to get back to sleep so no big deal. My daughter didn't sleep through the night until she was 21 months old because she would wake to nurse. Once she did start sleeping through the night, she has done so ever since and sleeps 10 hours at least each night without waking once. He'll get there

Amanda - posted on 09/08/2012

Well I would send boyfriend to the other end of the house or get him ear plugs. I did sleep training for my 2nd two babies early on. Don't jump up & go to him unless he sounds REALLY upset....even so leave him 5 mins. My lil one is 10 months and doesn't wake through the night unless he has a blow out or he's sick. Also is he eating enough before bed to have a full tummy? And does he maybe nap too much/too long through the day?

Keli - posted on 09/07/2012

My son has had a humidifier in his room since a newborn, i believe the noise keeps him asleep he was always a great sleeper when he was a new born he would sleep 4 hours wake up to eat,and sleep another like 6,then it turned into 8 hours straight and 12 hours a night by 2 months old. we have off nights now that he is older due too teething and growth spurts. today he got up at 4am and cried until 6am i was not getting up at 4 so i let him put himself back to sleep.

Lenise - posted on 09/07/2012

That does make perfect sense lol. I put a really soft one of him that he's been using since he was born and then his comforter. He has been cry free for two nights now! Loving life!!! I've cut his naps down to one during the day and I ignored him at night for 4 nights and I think he got the hint that he simply is not getting in our bed with us. Plus by cutting him down to 1 nap has helped a lot because he's a lot more tired at night now too. He actually does very good with only having 1 nap so life is good! Hopefully Im not jinxing it haha. Thank you:-)

Laura - posted on 09/07/2012

Hiya, my son who is nearly 2 used to wake up around 3am every night then someone told me the temperature drops at a certain time of the early hours, so I wrapped him up extra warm and it worked. Good luc I know it's tiring.

Lenise - posted on 09/04/2012

I agree. The crying it out has worked a lot. He still whimpers a little a night but he finds his binkie and he goes right back to sleep. Nothing even close to what he was like a week ago. It will take time im sure before he realizes that he will be ok. Unfortunately tonight he is getting sick with a cold that my boyfriend had passed to him. I think the next couple of nights if he wakes up it will probably because he doesn't feel good but after the special treatment and extra attention and he feels better I will go back to what I've been doing. Hopefully this cold won't last long. Thank you :-) Update soon!

Rachel - posted on 09/04/2012

Welcome to parenthood!! You could try and let him cry it out, but if memory serves me right this is the time that he may be getting nightmares. So he may need you to comfort him. My daughter is 3 1/2 years old and she still comes in to our bedroom for comfort from time to time. Cheerish it because it won't be long they won't want you to kiss and cuddle them. Hope you find the answer that best suites you and your family's need.

Lenise - posted on 09/02/2012

Thank you everybody!! I greatly appreciate all the advice! I decided to do the "let him cry" method. Everytime he wakes up crying I go in there and pat him and get him in his comfy spot and give him back his binkie. He throws himself backward and screams more obviously because he wants me to pick him up. So I walk away and let him cry. Then once he settles down I go back in his room and cover him back up ad make sure he has his binkie. He did learn to put his binkie back into his mouth and is actually pretty good at it. He has been sleeping through the night since he was 4 weeks old (very lucky lol). He has slept from 9 to 7 since then so this is just recent. Our house is always very busy with family in and out constantly so he's used to all ye attention so I know this is what he's wanting. I have told all our family to reduce the amount of carrying him everywhere so it's not so hard on me during the week. My son has started to "test" me and try to push him limits so I truly believe this is what he's doing at night. My boyfriend has been supportive as much as it kills him to hear him cry he is dealing with it and letting me take over this situation. I will update in a couple days to let you all know how he did. Again thank you all so so much for the help. I will take consideration to everyone's advice. After all I am a first time mommy so Im learning patience and I can take all the advice I can get.

Bobbie - posted on 09/02/2012

Your son is in need of comfort and he can comfort himself with a great soother. I have attached a watchable youtube review of the one I like best. If you introduce it at nap times he should quickly learn to activate it when he wakes in the night. It will also light his crib just enough to hunt down that binkie.

Sacora - posted on 09/01/2012

I agree with Keri Ripp. I talked to my boys' pediatrician about their sleep issues and she recommended melatonin, she also said not to use it everynight, just on nights that they are restless... on some people one of the side effects is nightmares other people don't have any side effects, just food for thought =)

Keri - posted on 09/01/2012

Most children do not sleep through the night, that is 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep, until they are about age 4. There are lots of children that will sleep through the night younger, but that is the average age. While I know it can be hard to not get a good nights sleep, just keep doing what you are doing. Unless there is an actual sleep issue and he is under the supervision of a pediatrician, I would not medicate your baby to help him sleep. If he is just fussing a little you could wait and see if he will self soothe, but if he is crying then go to him and comfort him. He needs the reassurance right now. He will sleep eventually.

Anita - posted on 09/01/2012

My husband and I use a white noise maker. A very very loud one that makes train rumbles. She sleeps so deep! She is 5months old. You should pick up the happiest baby on the block's guide to great sleep! Its amazing. It saved us during the hardest of times. Please email me if you have questions or just wanna chat! anitacmiron@gmail.com

Jessica - posted on 08/31/2012

I have a 12 month old and I give her a warm Milk he might be hungry sometimes they still need to eat my little one isn't to bad but my 4 year old would wake up to eat, and if I left a warm bottle by the bed she would take it and fall back asleep

Dove - posted on 08/31/2012

I'm with your boyfriend on letting him cry. He's 12 months old and perfectly normal to be doing this. Keeping extra binkies within his reach might help.



If it makes you feel any better... my best friend's mom tells of how none of her kids slept through the night without needing her until they were 5... and she had 3 kids all 5 years apart. Yep, the poor woman didn't sleep for 15 years! lol



All of mine were sleeping through (or at least not disturbing me when they woke) between 14 months and 2 years with minimal help and no crying. This stage won't last forever though I'm sure it feels like it right now.

Belinda - posted on 08/31/2012

make sure that there are a few pacifiers in the crib and teach him to replug the paci. Or take the paci away. You would know if it was night terrors. You wouldn't describe his crying as whining, it would be much worse than teething, he would also not soothe when you put the paci in his mouth. Something else to consider is that if he is not falling asleep without you helping him at bed time he will need your help to put himself back to sleep during partial arousals at night. - everybody wakes up in the middle of the night but we know how to put ourselves back to sleep.

Trin - posted on 08/31/2012

He's 12 months old, he's still just a baby. I'd check out the No-Cry Sleep Solution. It's a great book, and will make your boyfriend happy, because it doesn't involve letting your child do extinction crying. Another thing to consider might be moving the crib close to your bed, so when he cries, you can pat him back down without really having to wake up.



This is a good article on why you would want to consider not doing cry it out: http://www.abc.net.au/local/stories/2012...

Sacora - posted on 08/30/2012

I give my boys a stuffed animal to sleep with, I tell them that their "baby" will keep them safe, I also let my son sleep with a hanger so "just in case" he sees a monster, he can beat the monster with a stick. I've heard of other mom's making "monster repellent" putting water in a squirt bottle with a little bit of glitter or food coloring. I thought that was a really cute idea, other than the night terrors, I have no idea how to avoid them, maybe read to your son before he goes to bed that way his mind is more on the story...

Lenise - posted on 08/30/2012

Never thought of that! Thank you. But I do have tons of night lights for him. My mom recently just bought him the dream lights pillow pet for his birthday. Is there anything that could avoid these bad dreams? Haha yes I agree with you about my boyfriend. The problem with that is when we brought our son home from the hospital we decided it was best that I stayed home with the baby. With that being said he is constantly working so really doesn't understand that it is ok to let him cry! Lol. Drives me crazy! But if it comes down to it I will tell him to buy ear plugs. Thanks again:-)

Sacora - posted on 08/30/2012

I think they have liquid melatonin; he could be having night terrors; maybe have a night light in the room. And I'm sorry, but you're gonna have to tell your boyfriend to buck up or move on, if he can't stand a crying baby he can sleep elsewhere in my opinion. (sorry if that comes off snarky, but I can't stand significant others who act so selfish, yes it's annoying but it's the life of motherhood and he needs to recognize)