Lisa - posted on 11/21/2011 ( 16 moms have responded )
I'm a SAHM because I'm on disability. Plus, both my boys have special needs. My 12-year-old has Tourette's, OCD and Bipolar Disorder. My 9-year-old has HF Autism, Sensory Processing Disorder and Dyspraxia. With my older son having so many problems lately because of his hormonal changes, the stress has been very high. So high, that the fibromyalgia I was diagnosed with several years ago, has come back after 4 or 5 years of remission. I also suffer from high anxiety and a mood disorder. So, tell me, what would your reaction be if your husband nagged and nagged about the house not being clean, dishes not washed and clothes not finished? I swear, I'm with the children a lot more than he his. I take them to their doctor appointments and occupational therapy. Now, I'm suffering chronic pain due to the high stress of our older son having such a difficult time. Last night, my husband said, "I NEED you to support me in getting the kids to clean up after themselves and take their shoes to their rooms." Okay, so I have a bad habit of leaving my shoes where I take them off - usually at the couch, but I do pick up after the kids almost everyday. My husband does cook because I'm not very good at cooking. He also usually does the dishes. I try to at least get the laundry done weekly so the kids have clean uniforms for school. I just see the priority as being our boys, but I feel that my husband's priority is for me to keep the house clean. He just refuses to see that I do productive things everyday. No, it's not usually housework, but I agree it does need to be done. My husband said last night that he was tired of being everyone's maid and servant. What?? I get the boys ready for school everyday, fix their lunches, give them their medicine, and make sure their book bags are packed. I also take care of our 2 dogs and 3 cats.
How would you respond? Is he right? Do I just need to make time for cleaning, too? I'm so exhausted by the time the kids get off to school, that I feel that I have to recuperate. I'm just frustrated, not to mention in pain all over. I'd like to respond to him in a diplomatic fashion, but I'm just pissed off for now. I'm open to your advice!