how do you know when your ready for another baby?

Brandis - posted on 10/20/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I'm 22 and my husband is 24...we have a 2 year old little boy...I'm ready for another baby and my husband is not..he wants to wait..and waiting is one thing i hate to do...i want my son to have another child to play with.but any excuse or reason i give for wanting another child seem to not make any difference to my husband...i feel like i dont have a say so in this..he's not ready so i cant be ready either...he says money is an issue..but i feel like if i wait for money to not be an issue then it'll never happen...its a very frustrating subject to talk about cus seems like everyone is poppin out babies left and right...

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Sarah - posted on 10/20/2009

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Waiting is HARD especially when you want something SOOO bad, but sometimes waiting is the better thing. You will need your hubby on board with trying to juggle two kids. It is a BIG adjustment that at first is very overwhelming no matter how ready and prepared you are for the addition. I do agree that really there is never a time you are TRUELY ready. Time, money, even just life situations can always be in a better place before adding another child. On the other hand, there are better times and not so good times to add another. Many times you can do it with the amount of money you have now, but not always is it the best. When money is short it is stressful. There are many things you can go without, but sometimes it is nice to get those things you always dreamed. I recently took my daughter to a rock concert. We had a BLAST!! This is something we could have very well done without, but this was one of those things I had always dreamed about doing with my daughter some day. It was a memory we created that will last a lifetime. I have two kids, but would like more. I am very much like you where it is hard to wait when I am ready to experience all those things I loved with my other children. One thing that has helped me is making a list. There were things we wanted to accomplish before we started for #3. Sit down with your hubby and figure out a list of things that you both would like to be accomplished before trying for the next one. My last thing on my list is saving the $ I will need to pay bills during my maturnity leave (I don't get paid for maturnity leave). I can take as long of a leave as I want, so I needed to figure out how long I would want off and then had to figure out how much $ that would mean I needed to have. Even though I am in the saving mood I am still living life. I don't want to stop doing those special things with my kids now. Making the list has REALLY helped me with the wait. It has given me something to focus on and I also know that each time something is accomplished on the list it is one step closer to that other dream :).

[deleted account]

I agree with your husband. Both need to be financially stabled to have another baby. Babies do require pampers, bottles, clothes, food, etc...



I waited 5 years before I had my son, but at the time I was going to school and working. It was hard for me to add a baby in especially making less than $12 an hour. I'm glad I waited because things are expensive..



But maybe asking your husband to explain the money issue is best.. Maybe he wants to wait until he gets a raise or a promotion...



April

Brandis - posted on 10/20/2009

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when we had my son our financial situation was way worse than it is now....and we managed.he gets a dollar raise every 6 months....i just didnt want there to be too much of an age gap between him and a future sibling....but never seems to matter what i want in this department....

[deleted account]

I agree with your husband. Both need to be financially stabled to have another baby. Babies do require pampers, bottles, clothes, food, etc...



I waited 5 years before I had my son, but at the time I was going to school and working. It was hard for me to add a baby in especially making less than $12 an hour. I'm glad I waited because things are expensive..



But maybe asking your husband to explain the money issue is best.. Maybe he wants to wait until he gets a raise or a promotion...



April

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