I feel like a horrible mom :(

Karen - posted on 06/29/2012

Oh, Just Yesterday! I almost forgot. My husband and I had our son (13 months) at the pediatrician for possible (but not) chicken pox. My son was sitting on my lap, while the Dr. was checking him over. I also happened to be sitting next to the exam drawers. While talking to the doctor my son got a hold of a drawer handle and opened it. He did this 2 or 3 times and I took his hand off the handle and closed the drawer. Next thing, he got it again but it slipped shut on him too fast and got his finger! Right in front of the doctor and all! He cried, of course, and has quite the bruise on his finger nail bed. Talk about feeling bad! At least the doctor kind of laughed it off, saying "we all saw it coming, sometimes you just can't move fast enough to catch a toddler!"

Ana - posted on 06/29/2012

P.S. My hubby tries that with me too.. ohh you should be more of a ninja with her.. watching her every move...blah blah..

but when she falls in his care off the bed or bumps her head or something, he tells me with a strange look on his face, (I know I talked trash to you about this kind of thing happening) and I just look at him and squint my eyes and ask him was he coughing while she was falling???.....not allowed to cough...or take your eyes off child...hubbies!

Ana - posted on 06/29/2012

Yes you do get the award. You were there for your child, you remained calm for your child, you patched her up, and your making plans to ensure that this doesn't happen again. Your hubby is being hard on you. Not even he could watch any human being every second of the day, if it wasn't that then it would have been something else..kids get into things.

I have a 2yr old and she gets into stuff all the time. Tearing books (today)..Just take time out and demand that things be done (make the grand parents give in to some things) so that the child remains safe...because even when things are locked up, they climb up to get things that are put high up instead.. they are just kids..

I tell myself everyday, I have to prevent my child from hurting herself with or on something. She just learned to climb up on the dinning room chairs and take things off the table (she opens all the bananas and takes a bite of each one).....Now I have to move everything from the table..

Karen - posted on 06/29/2012

ACCIDENTS happen! I am SO sorry that your husband reacted that way! Sure, I suppose, ALL accidents Are "our fault." But as I said, Accidents happen. You CANNOT, no matter how hard you try, protect your child(ren) from EVERYTHING that may ever happen to harm them in some way. We are mothers, but we are only Human! At my house my, then 11 month old, son (now only 13 months) tried to eat a piece of broken glass! A ceramic cereal bowl had been broken about a week before he found the ONE piece that didn't get cleaned up. I think he found it under the recliner about 5 feet from where the bowl broke. I didn't even know what he had at first. I was roaming around the room dusting while he was playing on the floor. I kept glancing behind me to check on him. I first noticed he had something in his mouth, I started toward him to get whatever it was out, and then saw some blood dribble out of his mouth! Talk about a "trying hard NOT to freak out" moment! I got him quick before much damage was done, it was only a real thin blood, mostly pink. He never cried or even fussed about it. He let me get it out of his mouth and continued to play, crawling around like nothing had happened. I felt HORRIBLE! It could have been sooooo much worse! I did not want to tell my husband what I allowed to happen because I missed a shard of glass. I did tell him, of course, and his reaction was, as long as our boy is fine, no harm really done. Maybe remind your husband that no matter how good of a parent you are, NO ONE can watch every move their makes 24/7. It's just not possible. Also, her cut could have been a LOT worse. Be thankful it was MINOR! I hate to say it, but this will Not be the last time she gets cut, bruised, bumped, or broken.

Keri - posted on 06/29/2012

My two year old got hold of my razor this morning. I stupidly left it on bathroom sink and she got hold of it. She cut her thumb, and at the moment still bleeding. I've applied pressure and bandaged it up. I feel like such an idiot. I was calmed to know that I'm not the only person this has happened to and that its normal with the bleeding. She seems fine and happily kissing her boo boo's better. I will be changing her dressing before bedtime and check again in the morning. It can be worrying to see your child bleed an excessive amount from such a small cut/graze. But we are only human and mistakes are made... I will not be leaving my razor on the sink any time soon :( I am responsible for her cutting herself. But I do not feel like an unfit mother. I knows there's gonna be worse things to come as she grows up. Touch wood nothing major. xxx

Nicola - posted on 09/24/2010

dont worry, you would go stir crazy if you had to pad, lock and child proof every corner of the world! accidents do happen, my 1 yr old has 2 lingering scars on his feet from me not paying attention to where he was walking! but you just have to remember that accidents happen. I would even go as far to say that if your mother-in-law was so shallow that she put the look if her bathroom over the safety of her grand child than she can share alot of the blame!

Bec - posted on 09/24/2010

My goodness, how I feel for you! Just out of curiousity has your hubby ever watched her? They can walk that fast and for that matter they can crawl that fast! Don't beat yourself up too much, you did the right thing after you got to her. My son is 3 now and he has been very active since I was pregnant with him and into everything as soon as he could pull himself across the floor. He has smashed fingers, fell off of things, cut fingers, had stitches, has gotten lots of bruises and scrapes and almost all of them happened within a minute of my husband or myself checking on him. We have locks on our cabinets and he figured out how to get them opened, we have barel bolts on our doors at the top and he climbs on things and unlocks them, he has gotten up before we did and went outside by himself and was barely 2 at that time. You can try to watch them every second of the day, but some things are a learning process for them. That doesn't mean that it isn't our responsibility to watch and care for our children, but part of that is also letting them learning consequences to their actions. If they run, they're going to fall! My son has yet to learn this concept, that's where most of his scrapes come from =) You sound like a great mom, just keep doing a great job and she will be just fine!! As far as you mother-in-law goes, I'm sorry that you have to live with them that is a lot of stress on your family I'm sure. Some advice that I can give you that my husband gave me about his mom, take everything she says as advice if you want to do it go ahead, if you don't just ignore it and don't let it get to you!

Shandy - posted on 09/24/2010

I know exactly how you feel, I have had a few accidents like that, such as my son was running, and he tripped on his own to feet and hit his head on the coffee table, and he started to bleed, and it wasnt that deep of a cut, but I was soo worried, with the bleeding and being on his head that it could be serious, and so I called my boyfriend and parents and the samething pretty much happend, they all said it wasnt that bad, but then later on said it was my fault etc, and it definitely feels horrible, especially coming from someone you never thought would say something like that.

Alex - posted on 09/24/2010

kids will get into everything and anything, especially when they aren't supposed to. once they are mobile there is no stopping them. it could be a couple of minutes or a few seconds! my girls have gotten all kinds of bumps and bruises, cuts and scrapes. they are monkeys and are very very curious! my eldest cut herself on a razor when she was 3. luckly it wasn't that bad either but i know how that feels! when my youngest was about 3 months old (after over a month of colic and sleepless nights) i feel asleep with her on my chest on the couch. well i know for a fact i was only out for a minute cause i looked at the clock, but within that minute, that tiny little bundle managed to roll right off my lap onto the floor! i felt horrible and my husband had kinda the same reaction (why were you sleeping? why weren't you paying attention?! etc.) but when i explained that i hadn't slept in about 3 months for more than 1 hour at a time, mabye a total of 3 per night, he quickly apologized and told me he was just freaked out cause he was afraid she was hurt. don't stress about it. get those locks put up (your mother in law should be all for the locks.. i don't get that) and don't freak out over the little things. best of luck to you and remember that you are a great mom! we can't watch them every second of the day! it's not humanly possible!

Jennifer - posted on 09/24/2010

Believe me..I know the feeling of living with in laws. We lived with my inlaws until my oldest was 6 years old!!! I felt like I wasn't allowed to baby proof the way I wanted to. Their house has one of those old floor heaters...it is litaerally a furnace in the floor...it is huge with a metal grate over top that gets extremely hot. I melted a pair of sneakers once just by stepping on the edge. My second daughter was just over a year old and had recently started walking. I was standing facing the table and she was standing right next to me, with the heater behind us. I believe she was trying to reach for something on the table and lost her balance, before I even knew what happened, she had stumbled backwards onto the heater she ended up with 2nd and 3rd degree burns on the heel of one foot. Thankfully she healed up just fine and doesn't even have a scar or anything. If I'd had it my way there would have been a screen or something surrounding the heater to keep the kids off of it. We never had a problem with my 1st daughter because she was only crawling during her first winter and we could just lay a chair sideways to keep her from getting near the heater and for her 2nd winter she was old enough to know that it was a no-no and would stay away from it. It took the accident with my daughter for my father in law and my husband to come up with a way to keep the kids away from it. We now live next door and my newest baby is crawling like crazy, and I think she will be walking soon, and we are coming into our first winter. Thankfully I no longer have to worry so much about the heater because my brother in law bulit a screen for it when his daughter was born (he was only 13 when we had our first so he didn't have the skills to do it then).
I would baby proof the best you can.. even if it means drilling into her cabinets. If she throws a fit about it then you can just tell her that if she doen't want things drilled into her cabinets then she needs to make sure dangerous things like medicine, chemicals and blades are placed in higher cabinets that are out of reach.

This also reminded me of an incident with my son when he was about 4. He was visiting his Nana and she had left a pair of scissors on the table within reach. My son decided he needed a haircut and promptly chopped a big chunk of hair off of the top of his head, about the size and shape of a 50 cent piece with a nickel on top of it. He cut all the way down to the scalp in one spot about the size of a dime. It was so bad that `I had to use the lowest setting on our hair clippers and you could still see where there was a shorter spot! Now my mother in law absolutely hates shaved heads. Not the bald skin but the shaved down to stubble look. So she was so mad that I had shaved his head. Believe me when I tell you, I tried for 20 minutes to figure out a way to comb his hair over the bald spot. But the spot was so big and he had different lengths all over that there was just no way to do it. I just told her that it was her fault because she had left the scissors down and wasn't watcing him. (I keep scissors up high where the little kids can't reach them, and they are supervised when they do use them.) I get irritated with my inlaws because they have a 2 yr old living with them now and they leave knives and scissors on the edge of the table where she can reach them. It's a constant battle.

Stacey - posted on 09/24/2010

Hi Amy, I know the feeling of being blamed for every little accident, my partner seems to think i do nothing all day and when the kids hurt themself its my fault for not watching them. My oldest bounced on her bed at age 2 1/5 and managed to split her chin open, the scar is still there and will be for the rest of her life.. and it was my fault because i wasn't watching her as i'd turned around to turn the light off!!!!! we have little accidents all the time but that is what kids do!!!

Lisa - posted on 09/23/2010

First of all, this kind of stuff happens and no one is perfect. I do hope that you remind him of this when your daughter is in his care! Secondly, I noticed that he only turned on you once you brought up the fact that his mother was going to lecture you?? Am I right with this?? He was defending his mother and therefore had to cut you down with the most recent thing he was upset with in order to make you upset too. Gotta love em! I am sure that you are a wonderful mother! i just had to figure this out with a calculator for you. So you have been awesome 648000 minutes minus 2 minutes of it.. yep, sounds to me like you are indeed awesome!! Dont let him make you feel bad!

Jane - posted on 09/23/2010

Don't beat yourself up about this -- or allow someone else to make you feel guilty, even if it is your husband. You're right. Accidents happen and the important thing is that she is okay. However, this may have been a very cheap lesson. Whether she opened the door this time or not, she probably will be soon, so please make sure to babyproof, whether the I-Ls like it or not. No matter how responsible you are or what a super mom you are, you cannot watch your baby every second of every day, especially as she gains dexterity to open things herself!

Crystal - posted on 09/23/2010

Don't feel bad! If I felt took to heart how awful I felt every time my 2 year old son had an accident of some kind, I'd be hiding under a rock! He seems to get a new bruise every day. He has no fear (except of heights, and that's not much) and even after he falls off something, he'll just go and do it again. Guess I should be grateful he's not a quitter...I guess...lol

Husbands do that kinda thing. Dunno why. I guess to make themselves feel better in the heat of the moment. My hubby did that when our son fell off the bed with me sitting by him. He just slid right off. Few days later, guess what? He fell off w/ my hubby watching him. He knows now just how fast the monster is, lol.

You're a good mom. Don't beat yourself up. File it away and move on. Things happen. :)

Desiree - posted on 09/23/2010

First of all, I am not legible for the "Mommy of the Year" award until my youngest is atleast 10 (she's 9mos) You're a parent there are no instructions or directions, it is one of the only jobs where "learn as u go" means "will make mistakes" and it is okay no matter the support or lack of support you receive from others. My 8yr rolled off a couch at 3mos, i thought i had blocked her in well enough and had to use the restroom, she is fine and was fine, scared me nearly to death, but i learned and you will too. Others; spouse, inlaws, whomever will make mistakes too use your experiences to show them the compassion they may not have been willing to doll out and chalk it up to a lesson learned. You'll be fine and so will your child and that's all that matter anyway, Good luck

Jill - posted on 09/23/2010

My baby grabbed the hot iron off the ironing board as I was unplugging it and got 2nd degree burns across her face and wrist. I was standing right there! The worst moment of my life. To make it worse my hubby went crazy and I had to have him leave the house until he calmed down. 6 months later thankfully there is no scar on her face and just a small one on her wrist. Accidents happen even when you are 2 feet from your child. I needed the support of the one I loved not to be further berated and made to feel worse. The good things that come out of these horrible things is that you will now be uber-careful and my hubby is in anger management classes. I won't tell you not to feel bad because every time I see that iron I relive that moment of her clutching the iron in her hands and it flopping across her face and all I can think of is how lucky we are she didn't scar. All you can do is be more careful. Good luck.

Dana - posted on 09/23/2010

Accidents do happen, and I just don't think your husband is empathizing enough with your situation. If it was him at home 24/7 with the baby, there's no doubt in my mind things would happen! Try not to feel too bad!! I also felt HORRIBLE today when my 7 month old was sucking on the end of the laptop cord, which was plugged into the wall at the other end, and started screaming. He must have gotten a bit of a shock:( I had turned my back for one minute and it happened. Believe me, this isn't the first time something like this is gonna happen and the sooner your husband and you can agree to not play the blame game, the better things will be.

Sue - posted on 09/23/2010

the last time i got accused of not being diligent enough i left the little ones with my partner alone for a couple of hours --- he said "never again" and now watches his tongue on that

Krystina - posted on 09/23/2010

Moms go through things like this all the time and no your not a bad mommy. no matter how much we try to protect them they are going to get hurt sometimes. we just do our best and give them lots of love. hang in there you learn from trial and error.

Amalea - posted on 09/23/2010

While what happened is scary indeed, its not going to get you the bad mom award. Its hard keeping up with a toddler, and even harder with the fact that you are living in a home that is not even baby-proofed. As grandparents, they should want to have a safer enviroment for their grandbaby. You should not get down on yourself for what happened. While the situation with your daughter and the razor could have been so much worse, the fact of the matter is that you stepped in and knew what to do. Your daughter doesnt seem upset in the least, so neither should you. Nobody is perfect hon, and accidents will happen. As for the husband, he is just venting out his fears, and often its aimed at us. My husband is the exact same way. I learned a long time ago, to think independently from my husband. I hate to say it, but driving up to his job and all that, its almost begging for some trouble. I know it sounds stupid, but men hate being bothered at work, and they always get into 'jackass mode' on the job. Thats why if I have a problem, I solve it on my own. Unless it requires going to the doctor, I let him know about it when he comes home. Youre doing a good job dear, and yall are young and new parents. We all make mistakes, dont dwell on them!!!

Yasmin - posted on 09/23/2010

AWWWWWW that is so unfair that you were made to feel guilty about an accident.....that is why is called an accident not a purposedent. And like most Mums, you were already beating yourself up over the whole ordeal.I know how quickly and moment with a child can change, 1st of all my first born, when he was 2, came running toward me in the loungeroom, only to trip on his feet and bang his head on the corner of the coffee table....wow did that bleed!!I called an ambulance and applied pressure.By the time the ambulance had arrived, Baby was fine and bleeding had stopped.The head bleeds alot as it has blood vessels close the the surface.They took him to the hospital to glue the little cut together and all was fine. Then when the same son was 3 & i was 8 months pregnant with my 2nd, i lost my son in literally a few seconds of not looking at him at my nephews sport carnival.Let me tell you, it was the worst 5 minutes of frantic searching i wouldnt wish on anyone.I felt so guilty that this could have possibly happened.He had run back to the park,from literally underneath my nose and was sitting on the see saw. I wanted to yell at him and tell him what had done was naughty....but relief and tears just came flooding. Then the little brat did it to me about a year ago in the city araghhhhhh!!! Hubby never made me feel bad, see, we all have disaster moments, and unfortunately as much as you are paying attention, it can all happen within a blink of an eye.I have also clipped my babies fingers instead of their nails araghhhhh!!You are only Human lovely, and obviously a very loving Mummy. Dont be too hard on yourself and shame on those who make you feel even more worse than you already do.xoxoxoxox

Ashly - posted on 09/23/2010

you did everything right, i have 2 boys 5 and 8, and they are forever getting at things they shouldnt, although no accidents as yet lol. your husband should not have said that to you, it was very wrong, we all get upset when our kids hurt themselves, but you cant wrap them up in cotten wool either.

Monica - posted on 09/22/2010

I know you feel terrible, but accidents happen. You cannot watch your children every second of the day! I would like to see your husband do it. Let him try it and get back to us.

When my son was 18 months old, I was packing my camp trailer and he was in there with me. I turned for 2 seconds to throw some clothes on the bed and he pushed on the screen door and fell out onto the blacktop. He had a scraped face from the forehead to the chin and a black eye that was completely swollen shut. I was a wreck and felt like I just earned worst mother of the year award. His beautiful face eventually healed and you can't even tell now (I thought he'd never look the same). I was also embarrassed to have him out in public!

Tara - posted on 09/22/2010

Accidents happen .. and you can be standing right there or in the next room .. if it's going to happen it just will and honestly not much you can do about it .. i as putting away my boys clothes (i have 3 boys under 4yrs old) and my 2 oldest were on the bunk bed playing around and while i'm standing there yapping at them to get down and stop horsing around my middle boy decided to JUMP off ... needless to say a trip to the hospital was in order and 5 stitches later ...

Really Amy, it almost always could have been worse :) and chin up about the nasty comments ... men have a way about reacting when it comes to their momma's .. and what their momma says is "law" LOL

Donna - posted on 09/22/2010

well next time something like that happens just dont say anything lol

Katie - posted on 09/22/2010

OH! and one time I was bathing my newborn baby in my bathroom sink and accidentally bumped the faucet and got HOT water on her leg. She screamed and I bauled for 30 min. But it all turned out fine! Another time, I was at my parents' house and my oldest (now 12) (then 1) was in her little chair that clipped onto the kitchen counter. LOVED that thing. They loved being up as high as we were and watching! But I went to move it, slide it over one way or the other, which I had done a lot, but this time, her pinky finger got stuck under one of the bars and the counter and when I pulled it out..... it was FLAT! Being a first time mom, I freaked, almost took her into ER, but didn't. After about 5 minutes, it was back to normal and not even hurting her. Holy Crap it scared me to death!

Katie - posted on 09/22/2010

I'd say, ask your husband to stay home one or two days alone with her. If he needs to go potty (and mind you, it usually takes them 30 min, right!??) and see if he can stop her from getting out and getting into trouble......??? These things happen, don't fret, don't beat your self up! At least it wasn't on her TONGUE!! hugs.

Jessica - posted on 09/22/2010

i gotta ask....did you atleast smack your husband or yell at him or cut him off or something??? if it had been my man he would be lucky not to be in a ditch if he talked to me like that.(sorry, redhead with temper issues) anyway. i cant remember how old my daughter was. she couldnt have been more than 6 months old at the time. we had her baby tub up on the bathroom counter for bath time. there is a mirror directly behind the counter, and its not a very thick counter, so she could reach the mirror from her bath. well, there is a crack in the mirror. i ran my hand over the crack before we put the tub there, and didnt get cut, so i assumed it would be ok, yet i still got onto her for touching it. one of the last times she got a bath up there, she wouldnt stop playing with the crack though. she ended up cutting herself, and i had a heck of a time stopping the bleeding cuz she was all wet. needless to say, i felt absolutely horrible. i let my 6 month old get cut. i was almost in tears over it when her daddy starts asking me what happened. her informed me that it wasnt my fault and that i shouldnt let it get to me. not easy to do when your little one is bleeding, whether the child cares or not! i immediatly had my man duck tape over the crack.....moral of the story....duck tape fixes everything. lol just kidding....but it really does!!

Staci - posted on 09/22/2010

It sounds like you are a wonderful mommy, and even with a 9 month boy I tell my husband that I can not physically have eyes on him on the time. It's just impossible & for anyone that thinks or acts otherwise is crazy! Babies need independence & they need to explore & learn surroundings, I don't think they can do that with mommy or daddy hovering over them all day. This must sound irresponsible, but I don't want a baby that feels like he must be held and in my reach all the time. It's not fair to me or him. Now he is never in a room by himself, unless he is in a excersaucer (because potty breaks are necessary). I don't think it makes me a bad parent to think my child and I need space! I refuse to be his only form of entertainment he needs to seek it out himself! Keep doing what your doing & don't let your husband or in laws get you down. You carried that child and there is no one in the world that loves her and wants to keep her protected more than you!

Kelina - posted on 09/22/2010

when my husband was 7 months old his mom was getting him and his sister ready to go to a mommy group. His sister was not listening and not getting her shoes on so his mom put him in his walker so she could chase down his sister. in the few moments she left him he walked over to the wood stove and planted his hand directly on the glass. needless to say he got a major burn due to the heat. He still has the scars on his hand... Guess what? he was back at it the next day!

Danielle - posted on 09/22/2010

That's a really tough situation to be living in with a toddler and not be able to baby -proof the way you might want to. Just so you can go to the bathroom!!!! These things happen to all of us, some of us just won't admit it :) so don't feel bad. And you can let your husband know that we all love being stay-at-home moms but that means we are literally spending every minute of every day with our little ones (esp. you are!)! My quick minute in the bathroom is my peaceful relaxing time of the day :) You deserve that! Maybe you could get a pack n play so that you could go to the bathroom.

Paula - posted on 09/22/2010

I think your husband's being a wee bit unreasonable - it is a terrible thing to have happened but of course these things happen! Yes, you're responsible for your little girl and it would have been great if you'd locked the door, but that's all in retrospect. I've not had my little one yet, it's due in 3 weeks and everytime I imagine holding it while trying to fill a bottle of pour myself a glass of water (whatever, you get the drift) I imagine myself dropping the baby! It must be so hard to juggle these everyday tasks, living in a house not quite your own and having to abide by someone else's rules. You just wanted a pee, you can't have your head on your shoulders all the time! I think you deserve Mommy of the Year just for dealing with all that :D Don't worry, your husband probably just spoke tactlessly, one of those guy things....I'm sure he didn't mean you're a bad mother. You sure sound like a good one.

Jackie - posted on 09/22/2010

Don't feel bad. When my daughter was 4 months old, she and I were sleeping in my bed (it's a full size mattress) and she chose THAT day to learn how to roll over. Well, I woke up to a loud THUMP and WAAAHHH!! I jumped out of bed so fast that I landed wrong and actually broke my foot trying to find her because I didn't know where she was. I found her on the floor, and I checked her arms, legs, and head to feel for broken bones. At this point I didn't realize I had broken my foot, I was too full of adrenaline from her falling. After I checked her out and talked to her pediatrician on the phone I realized I myself needed to go to the ER for my foot so I had to call my husband from work to come get us. He was upset about it, but I think it was more a reaction to being afraid over our daughter's fall and my broken foot. Don't beat yourself up, accidents are called "accidents" for a reason!

Carolyn - posted on 09/22/2010

Accidents definitely happen. 2 weeks ago, I wanted to use the bathroom without kids in with me, so I decided to lock them out. When I closed the door, my son was crying (I thought it was because I locked him out, typical 2 year tantrum). When I got the door fully closed he threw a bigger fit. Finally he said, "thumb stuck!!" I opened the door and his finger was completely flattened! I was so upset with myself until I found out it happens all the time. Keep your chin up. Things happen. Now I know to watch more closely for fingers in the door.

Donna - posted on 09/22/2010

Kids move FAST at her age! When our daughter was about 15 months old, we were picking my husband up from work. She was standing next to me on the driver's side and he was on the passenger side putting stuff in the back seat. Just as he was finishing, she ran around the back of the car to "help" him. He didn't see her coming and swung the door shut just as she reached out and put her hand IN the doorway! You know that "OH SHOOT!" moment when you realize as you let go of the door that you left the keys in the ignition? It was that kind of situation but with her hand instead! Thankfully Kids are made of rubber at that age and the x-rays showed no injury. Her second trip to the emergency room was about 6 months later. We went to a restaurant. She was seated in her highchair. I was seated on her left, my husband on her right. The waitress set my soup on MY LEFT, so it was ACROSS the table from my daughter. As I stood up to put a bib on my daughter, she reached over in a flash and grabbed my bowl of soup. This all happened in about a second and a half! She had second degrees burns on her leg. Thankfully my husband poured his tea on her leg and the waitress and other patrons put ice into a towel or it would have been worse. The waitress was NOT at fault: she put the soup down as far away from my daughter as possible. Things like this happen very quickly and it is NOT an issue of being irresponsible. She fell out of her crib once with me standing right there, fell off my bed, off the couch, I actually tripped while holding her, the list goes on.

Here is a suggestion: Don't tell your husband that "he needs to care for her so he can learn how quick she is". That will just start an argument. Instead, on one of his days off tell him that you have some errands to run and will be gone for a few hours and that it will be easier and quicker for you to get home if he'll stay home with her. Let him know where everything she might need is at, and then say "Have a good Daddy-Daughter Day! I'll be home soon! I love y'all!" and let him spend some time with her. After chasing her around for a while and playing with her, he'll realize that you can't be right behind her every moment. Also make sure he has plenty of his favorite non-alcoholic drink. Soda, tea, water, it doesn't matter as long as it something he will normally drink a lot of :) He'll soon realize that HE can't go to the bathroom in peace, either! LOL

You're a good Mommy! You handled what could have been scary VERY WELL! Keep up the good work!

Sarah - posted on 09/22/2010

Oh hunny you are NOT a horrible mom!! Accidents do happen & sometimes it's hard to watch them like a hawk 24/7. I was at my parent's house & they have a loose brick on the edge of their fireplace that hadn't been fixed yet. I wasn't too concerned about it, because I figured it would be fine...well next thing I know, my son has pulled it over onto his bare foot. He started screaming like I have NEVER heard him scream & blood is gushing out from his toe. I cried so hard & I was sooooo mad at myself for not removing the brick and watching him closer. Anyway, after a few weeks or so, his toenail ended up turning black & blue & fell off. Poor little guy! But, now it's as good as new! Trust me, I felt terrible, but things like that happen. :(

Jessica - posted on 09/22/2010

First i would get out of his parents house asap if they are are not willing to put latches on the cabinets to protect their grandchild and have a fit when your daughter gets hurt by pure accident. It also sounds like your husband is being caught into their "your wife isnt watch your daughter as well as she should be". All i can say is take a deep breath when they start lecturing you. We all know no ones perfect and we all have had our share of bumps and bruises that could have prob been prevented with our parents watching us better. We all would agree as long as shes fed, bathed, being educated and not being abused we all would agree that your doing a great job. And always remember we are all far from being the perfect parent.

Ink - posted on 09/22/2010

My BIGGEST gripe about being a mom is the lack of bathroom time. I AM still human. I know that when I became a mother, things like hair cuts, nail polish and baths are GONE...but I still do poop...just like the rest of the world.

You didn't do a dang thing wrong....and if the shoe was on the other foot...I think your husband would have had a different opinion.

I have one little suggestion for the cabinet door latches....Go get a pack of Contact brand adhesive strips that you pull the tab and they let go. ( I think they call them "command")

http://www.amazon.com/3M-Command-17005-S...



Mount the safety latches with these strips instead of screws. They are hidden inside the cabinet door...making them out of touching range for little monkeys. When you leave your MIL's house, pull the tabs, the strips let go (just like on the commercial) and you haven't left a mark or a hole in her cabinet doors...and your mind can rest a little easier.



I have a cabinet that is really precious to my family. It is made from the crate my great grandfather's possessions were in when he came to this country from Ireland. It sits in the middle of my livingroom and has quickly become the 'changing station' for the baby. Wipes, diapers, medicines, candy, bibs... everything goes in there.

http://i53.tinypic.com/242fjpl.jpg

By putting the command strips on the safety latch, I could make that cabinet safe enough to hold his medicines without scarring the cabinet.

http://i54.tinypic.com/144625u.jpg

Christina - posted on 09/22/2010

That is so fuuny!!! cant believe it!!! yeah accidents happen all time thats for sure. Children are more resilient than we know!!

Christina - posted on 09/21/2010

Staying calm during an accident involving your precious child=mommy of the year award. That is OH SO important. Don't be so hard on yourself. Accidents happen.

April - posted on 09/21/2010

Ok, my situation today wasn't as serious as yours, however, it had the potential. I have a 6 month old and a 4 year old. I left the room to get dressed and use the bathroom. I left the baby on the living room floor after doing a quick scan to make sure that my oldest hadn't left anything small in the floor. My oldest was in my bedroom leaving the baby in the living room alone. I can see from my bathroom into the living room and the baby. He was rolling around on the floor happily playing. He stopped rolling and was still making noise, I looked out and it appeared to me that he was just talking to the ceiling fan. He then got quiet. I was finished so I shooed my oldest out of my room and came out to see why the baby got quiet. I found him with a crayon wrapper laying beside him that I somehow missed during my scan. He had gotten a hold of it and put it in his mouth. He was trying to get a bit of it out of his mouth so I grabbed him up and got a hold of it. He then started choking. I tried to scoop his mouth and couldn't find anything. So, I then tried patting him on the back and he threw up quite a bit. I told my husband who is away on business right now and he told me that I should have never left the room. Maybe I shouldn't have but at the time I thought it was a safe area for all the longer I was in there. So, my point is, we do all make mistakes. It's what we do with what we learned from them that matters. Sorry for the novel but I think that I needed to vent as well. :/

Regina - posted on 09/21/2010

Please don't feel guilty, and it's not your fault. Toddlers get into all kinds of things. I laugh with my husband because both our kids have had so many bumps and bruises. My daugher fell off the changing table, my son crawled right off our bed (while both my husband and I were there watching him), and both my son and daughter tumbled down 2 stairs in our house. My son just turned 1 in August. Before my daughter was 1 year old (she's turning 3 in October) she had had black eyes, bloody lips and the like. She started walking on her own at 10 1/2 months and there was no stopping her. You can baby proof until the cows come home and kids will still hurt themselves. My daughter was always walking into the door jams when she first started walking...so what should I have done, moved into a one room house? Honestly, I'm wondering why your mother in law left a razor laying out when there's a toddler living there. I wouldn't let her babysit any time soon :) Sometimes situations arize where we can't be right on top of our children. You did the right thing by not panicing. That's what gets kids upset. Friends of ours are always so surprised by how resilient and tough our kids are. It's because I've let them get hurt. I baby proof the house, but I'm not going to put my children in bubbles. Kids will get hurt; they'll get bumps and bruises and maybe even stitches and broken bones. It's a learning process. I'm sure your daughter won't grab a razor again if one is sitting out. Take a deep breath :)

Jasmine - posted on 09/21/2010

I've done so many things like this that make me feel bad. Probably worse, actually, cuz it really was completely my doing. Once, I was helping my son sit up when he was a baby. Usually he could sit up on his own pretty good, falling over every now and then. Well, I sat him up, then reached over for something and hear a THUD. He'd fallen, I felt so bad. He cried and cried. Another time when he was about 2 I was telling him he should jump of this stair at my moms house under the railing and I'd catch him. He finally jumps and rams his head right into a nail sticking out in the railing. He hit it so hard I thought for sure he was gonna die, but then when I looked it was barely even a poke so I guess he didn't hit as hard as I thought. The doctors said not to even bother bringing him in, that he had his shots and was probably fine. Still makes me feel SOOOOOOO bad though.

Rachel - posted on 09/21/2010

Do feel bad things happen. I am a single mom and I try my best to be everywhere with my son and my son is 3. He now can lock and open doors. But when he was 2 I was using a curling iron and I just turned it off and he came up to me and I told him not to touch the iron and right when I said that he touched and I couldn't mvoe his hand it time. He had a burn but it wasn't that bad. I did everything that I know to do. Then he complainned the next day so I took him to the doctor and he gave him some cream. But in your case Jacob has gotten hold of a razor before and took a part of his nail off on his finger. He bleeded for awhile but I cleaned him up and put a bandage on it and he was fine. I completely understand about feeling like you aren't a good mother cause I feel that way all the time. My son adn I both live with my parents and everytime something goes on they tell me I told you so. So I understand completely. But you are a good mother for knowing what to do and you did what you needed to do to help your little one. Don't let your husband get to you, I am not married but my parents make me feel like your husband made you feel.

Laura - posted on 09/21/2010

Your not a bad mam at all. It's part of the joy of being a mammy to feel guilty all the time!! ;)
I am a first time mam too and when my son was about 7 months old, he picked up a heavy candle holder that I had stupidly left on a low shelf. He dropped it on his big toe, and when I say he sobbed his heart out.. I felt awful! I was nearly crying myself! He had a bruised toe for weeks, and I beat myself up about it for ages! He's also hit his eye off the corner of the shower tray and had a big bruise around his eye for days! I felt horrible taking him out in public because I didn't know what people would think!
Now he's 16 months old and starting to run and climb, and he falls down and gets a hold of things he shouldn't all the time! Although I always feel bad when he hurts himself, I don't feel guilty anymore because it's just part of being a kid. They're curiosity always gets them hurt one way or another. Don't beat yourself up about it, just be there to cuddle her when something happens again.. :)

Aimee - posted on 09/21/2010

The same exact thing happened to my son... i wouldnt feel bad, things like this happen all the time. And razor cuts just bleed ALOT. My son always has a bump or cut somewhere, and my daughter sometimes but not as bad now that shes older. But it cant be helped. You can try locking up everything but they will still find something to get hurt on no mater what. I know how hard it is living with inlaws also, i had to for a few months and it was the worst thing ever! its not easy raising your child with others looking over your shoulder telling you that you arent doing it right. Everyone does things differently and it has nothing to do with being irresponsible. just ignore it. things just happen and you cant prevent it all. you cant have your eyes on your child 24/7 no mater what anyone says.

Micky - posted on 09/21/2010

There's no end to the hell I would have given him after that. That's not fair at all. You did good hon. Men tend to over-react to stupid stuff. My response would have been that they're his parents, not yours. I know that my hubby won't talk to either of our parents about anything, I have to do it all and I hate that.

Andrea - posted on 09/21/2010

Also, It was NOT your fault!

Andrea - posted on 09/21/2010

Accidents happen. But I know exactly how you are feeling! My little boy, 15 months as well, had to go to the ER and get his finger stitched up yesterday after he closed it in a door. I was got for 30 seconds! I felt like the worst mom in the world. And I still do. But those things happen, esp. to toddlers who have NO idea what they are doing when they hurt themselves.
Your daughter is fine :) its was just a cut on her thumb. And You are now a stronger Mama! Its hard, but it will get easier....I hear.
:)

Amanda - posted on 09/21/2010

Accidents happen and your husband will forgive you. I am sure its already forgotten..Everybody makes mistakes..Live and learn!