I feel like I'm going crazy! Can someone help?

Stephanie - posted on 09/09/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I am completely fed up with my life! Whenever i think about it i just go to my car and cry. For starters, I have 6 children ages 7(twins) to 13. I 've been married for 11 yrs now and 9 out of these 11 yrs I've been the sole financial provider for my family! Bc of this, I've become resentful not only to my husband but my to my children. Since 2001, we have moved 6 times! Twice and currently with my mother in law. Trust me not good at all! My husband who is finally working complains about making dinner even though he gets home before anybody else. He quit one job bc they "worked him too hard" and took another that pays less and not as frequent and sometimes not on time! He refuses to do laundry or clean up, but he always say, "we got to clean up in here" and that means me! I recently left my job and went to another which pays abit more, but in a yr a lot more! My children, I know aren't to blame, but I'm constantly dealing with the fighting, name calling, tattling, and basically not listening unless I'm threatening to spank them or take away their electronic games! My husband makes comments like, " don't be mad just bc you can't handle being a mother" or he thinks I'm being over the top. Our finances suck, which is another problem in our relationship as well as our entire living arrangements! I find myself lashing out at everybody and saying things that shouldn't be said especially to the kids. What can I do to make this situation better?

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Liz - posted on 09/13/2012

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Your husband is just wrong. You are trying to be a mother which is a full time job and then work everyday to provide food and clothing for your family too. You must run on complete empty by the end of the day. He needs to step up and be a MAN. He was man enough to bring those beautiful children into this world...he needs to support them. You are trying to be so strong for everyone and it is impossible. YOU NEED HELP WITH EVERYTHING. YOU WERE NOT MEANT TO WORK AND TAKE CARE OF 6 CHILDREN BY YOURSELF. Don't get down on yourself. You need realize that HE is pulling the whole family down with his lazy ass attitude. I know that you have to love your husband and you want it to work with 6 kids, but he needs a reality check. YOU ARE ONE PERSON. He should kiss your feet for bringing 6 of his children into this world. I really feel for you. I am sorry that you are so stressed. Liz

Gina - posted on 09/12/2012

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WOW I think I would have caved my husband's face in by now if he said or did that crap! Quick question? Do the kids help out with the house at all? If not then shame on them!! Noone should expect one person to be maid to that many members in a home! I have herd others suggest to make a list of every little thing each spouse does throughout a normal day,mainly to show the lazy spouse how many jobs the other is actually doing. But i don't think that works well. *been there,tried that* lol. The cpl counciling is a good thought though. If nothing else, it's a good way to vent all the frusterations in a safe way and have a 3rd person ready to offer ideas for BOTH OF YOU to improve the situation.

Unfortunately, sometimes lazy isn't easily fixed.

And the next time your hubby says that "we got to clean up around here" crap, simply look at him and respond with WE JUST GOT HOME FROM WORKING ALL DAY,WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? LOL sorry that's the b***ch in me popping out.

Dezerei - posted on 09/09/2012

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Hi Stephanie, sounds like you have a lot going on. I am also loosing my mind. I'm a first time stay at home mom of a 6 month old who is extremely active n hardly sleeps. It seems like your the mother of 7 children. Couples counseling?

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