I have no motivation to clean...anyone else feel that way?

Samantha - posted on 11/10/2009 ( 119 moms have responded )

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I am a stay at home mom and most days I feel like doing nothing. And then all the chores pile up and then I feel so much stress about getting everything cleaned that it makes me even less motivated to do anything! Does anyone else get this way?

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Stefie - posted on 11/17/2009

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I have a theory that being a SAHM you stare at the stuff all day long, try to keep it tidy, but it just stays messy despite your efforts. It is depressing and you just don't want to deal with it. I have found that I keep the house a lot cleaner if we get out a little. Then we messed the house less, and stared at it even less. I only allow myself one hour a day to chores. That way I never feel like my entire life has become house work. So far, the house is much cleaner.

Chelsea - posted on 11/13/2009

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We are in the same boat. I have been a stay at home mom for the past 4 1/2 years. It started out fun but then it gets real boring and tiring. My solution is that you reserve one day out of the week for a real good house cleaning. The rest of the days you should do just the basics. I do it while my kids are napping. I also turn on some music that really gets me moving, put on some heels and dance around while cleaning the house. It's real fun, you burn calories and if your husband is home then it's a treat for him too. Also see if you can get your husband to fold laundry while watching his football game or tv show.

Wendy - posted on 05/24/2011

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I get this way most of the time because Im like what is the point of cleaning if my kids just mess it up 10 minutes AFTER I clean! I just dont get it! My house cant stay cleaned for a whole day which would make me a happy mommy but never works! I really have to think of a good chore chart my kids :)

Ebony - posted on 11/17/2009

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I feel the same way. but when my daughter is sleeping I do them anyway because if they pile up I'm going to get angry and really not want to do them.

Stefie - posted on 11/17/2009

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I have a theory that being a SAHM you stare at the stuff all day long, try to keep it tidy, but it just stays messy despite your efforts. It is depressing and you just don't want to deal with it. I have found that I keep the house a lot cleaner if we get out a little. Then we messed the house less, and stared at it even less. I only allow myself one hour a day to chores. That way I never feel like my entire life has become house work. So far, the house is much cleaner.

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119 Comments

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Shannintipton - posted on 10/22/2011

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Hi Mercedes, I want to thank you for your input but this thread is a little old so I am going to lock it up. But thanks and keep up the great job. :)

Mercedes - posted on 10/21/2011

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yes i get this way i know exactly how your feeling i deal with it everyday.. just wish i had some help sometimes

Karen - posted on 05/24/2011

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wow this is the longest thread I've seen in a long time lol. YES i do feel this way about 3 times a week at least. I have 3 kids. If i spend 2 days catching up on all the laundry of 5 of us, by the end of the day my hamper is full again! The sink always has 2 meals worth of dishes no matter how many times a day I wash them. Can't keep my bathroom spotless to save my life. The one room that I can keep the door closed on half the day still continues to magically need cleaned at least 3 times a week. I don't stress about it. When I get motivated to clean is when i clean. some weeks are better than others. Spend time with the kids and enjoy it. they won't be little forever.

Melissa - posted on 11/17/2009

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ALL THE TIME!! I am so tired most days that I nap when the twins nap when I should be cleaning. When they are awake I spend my time entertaining them because it is hard to clean when they are running around.

Nicki - posted on 11/17/2009

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ABSOLUTELY!! Why do you think I'm on here? Trying to put off cleaning!

Heather - posted on 11/17/2009

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I DO LET THE LAUNDRY PILE UP I HAVE TO ADMIT THAT OTHER THAN THAT I'M PRETTY MUCH ALWAYS CLEANING SOMETHING BC I'M A STAY AT HOME, TAKING CARE OF MY BABY AND CLEANING, COOKING IS MY JOB! =)

Crystal - posted on 11/16/2009

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U bet! All I time is spent with the children. I love that part! It is hard to find time to clean. Just know that u love your children and they will remember the times you spent with them, more then the messy house. Great memories is what counts.

Krysti - posted on 11/16/2009

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I think most of us feels that way sometimes. I know there are days when I just can't get motivated to do any housecleaning, and so I don't! I do always stay on top of laundry because with 8 people in the house, it would swallow us all if I didn't. As far as the housecleaning goes, I tend to have better luck if I just concentrate on one or two things per day. I do clean up the kitchen daily because it's the busiest room in the house, but as far as the others; I only do about 1 or 2 housecleaning projects per day. This way it is not overwhelming. The other thing that is nice is I make Fridays "kids' cleaning days" where they are all responsible for their bedrooms and another room in the house. With 6 kids, there is no way I can keep it picked up on my own.

Melissa - posted on 11/16/2009

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I feel the same way, I am a mother of three children, 4, 6 and 10. I am in school one day a week, but it's a very hard class with a lot of homework and studying, and I have several health problems. I in no way feel or want to do house work. I have two boys that can help with chores and getting them to do it is like pulling teeth. My husband works third shift and sleeps during the day, so the only time he is of any help is his off days. My two boys need therapy due to very bad behavor and an excessive crying and complaining 6 year old. They say very mean things and cause so much stree on the household as a whole and my marriage.. But as far as the cleaning I don't know how to get the energy to keep it up all day or everyday or even every other day!!!! How about you? What do you do? How long in between your cleaning days and how many children do you have?

Emily - posted on 11/15/2009

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I find it harder to clean when the TV is on. Instead of turning it off, I clean up during commercial breaks.

Brandy - posted on 11/15/2009

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I am usually pretty specific about my house and keeping everything just right but when I go through those phases where I don't have the energy (which is alot lately being that I have an 18 month old and am 7 months pregnant) I just give in to it and take my rest as I need it. I would rather let my house go so that I can continue to give my daughter my 100% than have a clean house and feel like I have neglected my child because I used all my energy on the house. And my fiance is completely understanding and very helpful when I get too tired to keep up.

Marie - posted on 11/14/2009

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Almost every single day! But then I remember my husband, or sometimes am reminded lol, gets up every day and works his butt of for his family. So even though that bed looks Oh so inviting...i pull up my side of the bargain. Not saying I dont sometimes let it all pile up but If im gonna be a stay at home mom...i have to be a stay at home mom. Besides if we dont do it, who will?!?

Carina - posted on 11/14/2009

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I can totally relate..I feel the stress of chores piling up too but I'm learning that everything can't be done in a day..Don't worry too much..It took me awhile too..My daughter is 10 months old now & I'm still living in clutter LOL..but I'm learning to stop & breathe & take it 1 day at a time..and soak up every moment of your baby. It goes by so fast..doesn't it?! Good Luck!

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OMG yes! I've just finished over a weeks worth of washing, and longer of ironing...we were running out of clothes!

Yuliana - posted on 11/14/2009

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i have felt worse. every time i started cleaning i felt tire and i dint want to keep cleaning and wen i would see the mess i would start crying. don't feel sad . at the end of cleaning it made me happy because i have a clean place for my baby.

Amanda - posted on 11/14/2009

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Yep I have 3 kids still at home I hate dusting folding and irioning and they are the chores my husband refuses to do LOL! There seems to be more mess when you are SAHM All housework is a drag LOL!

Shayna - posted on 11/14/2009

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If I don't have a clean organized home I find myself feeling more stressed & edgy.



I get alot of my cleaning & disinfecting done during the evening when my hubby is home. I do still do things through-out the day, mostly laundry or some dishes, but I can't get right down and at it because my little guy is always at my feet. If something doesn't get done I don't lose sleep over it, it's not going to kill anybody.



Mom's put it off, cleaning because it's not a rewarding job. It gets boring doing the same old thing everyday & it just doesn't seem to pay off because after 1 hour of cleaning 5 minutes of mess eliminates all that cleaning.. it's truly a never ending job!

Gabrielle - posted on 11/13/2009

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i thought i would never get that way. i had my baby a little over two weeks ago, im brastfeeding. So when she sleeps i do as well. Im always on the couch, i dont want to go anywhere unless it the grocery store.

Kristi - posted on 11/13/2009

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I use to be like this....well..prier to the last two weeks, I had no motivation and I was always tierd, and it got depressing being home, while my husband got to leave the house..But eventually I realized that not only did it not help the arguing between my husband and I, but nobody eles was going to do it, so I decided to get myself a schedual, and I do a little bit each day, and try not to stress over it, I made and still make a list, of what i want to get done between monday and friday, and then i brake it down to what I want to do each day.
I start my day between 630 and 8 when my son wakes up, we play do breakfeast, then when i put him down for his morning nap, I will do the dishes sweep and mop, then i rest, and when he wakes up from his morning nap we do a snack and play some more, and then I will do a load of laundry maybe two, and I will clean the bedrooms then put my son down for his mid day nap and finish up the two loads of laundry, we do lunch, watch some kind of educational video i'll then do the dishes and straighten up and what ever last item i had on my list, and i do this each day, and find that when I do a little each day, the house stays clean, I've only been doing this for two weeks, but have found that not only am I happy, so is my husband and my son, and our life runs smoother...Good luck!

Elizabeth - posted on 11/13/2009

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that is me all the way. I am constantly trying to balance my school work, kids, house work and I just cant make it work. Even when my semesters are up I still cant seem to get motivated. i get so depressed over it too, I hate how disorganized my house is, i never use to let it get this way.

Carrie - posted on 11/13/2009

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I feel that way all the time! I hate cleaning, but more so lately I have been trying to do more!

Brandi - posted on 11/13/2009

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All the time. It seems I'm too busy with other stuff that on the days when I'm not running around I don't feel like doing anything but laying around with a book or a movie.

Sommer - posted on 11/13/2009

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I am exactly the same way. I am a stay at home mom also and I am sooo exhausted by the end of the day. I look at things this way: 1) Will it cause me to have bugs in my home? No, then leave it alone. 2) Do we all have clean clothes for tomorrow? Yes, then I am sitting down and relaxing.

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Oh yeah.. Especially when I was pregnant. I did absolutly NOTHING but stay up in my room with 3 fans blowing on me and reading the twighlight saga or watching t.v. or playing on the internet. But I was pregnant in the summer time and it was sooo hot. But even after I had Baylee I still felt like doing nothing. But I was tired... and I had wanted to breastfeed but she wouldn't latch on so I had to pump for like 2 weeks. And it was horrible but I wanted her to get the nutrients from the milk... But I quit after 2 weeks alittle breast milk is better than none. But anyways... Now when I clean I just keep cleaning don't even take a break cause I know if I do then I will get on the computer then get lazy and not want to do it anymore. I would put on some music and dance around and shit while I was cleaning. I can't cause the baby and the only time I get to clean is when she is sleeping... But it might work for you!

Mary - posted on 11/13/2009

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I am right there with you and I don't even have a little one. I feel like I have no ambition to do anything. It worries me too but I wonder if it is my depression. Have you thought that you might be? Not sure if that's my excuse or if I'm just down right lazy. I do know that medicines and certain underlying problems can be the reason. God Bless You and You are definitely not alone!

Mel - posted on 11/13/2009

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U are not alone ... I am tired when I go to sleep and I wake up tired. My brain is exhausted, I am exhausted. I am a single mum and there is no one other than me to do the cleaning, shopping, cooking, gardening, feeding the dog, washing, looking after and playing with the kids, the taxi driver etc.



I have no motivation to do anything .. need to loose a few pounds, wanting to do moisturise my skin, colour my hair, go to a salon, but there is not even that motivation.

Krystal - posted on 11/13/2009

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Yep most definately! I just got a cleaner who does the whole house once a fortnight for $35!!

Lonna - posted on 11/12/2009

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@marianna boyd -i felt the same way! i'm not as isolated as you, but i understand. i started walking and have lost 10lbs and feel a lot better. thank God for ipods! the weight loss helped with my sex drive because i started feeling sexy agian, and other things started to fall in place, like shaving and showering.



the only thing i made an effort to change was walking. absolutly no diet. i just needed to excercise, and the time by myself was nice, but the kids can be loaded into strollers. i just made my 4 yr old walk, and it's been really good for him too. we bond a lot on our walks, even though i'm home all day. go figure. if you ever want to vent, shoot me a message. take care

User - posted on 11/12/2009

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ah, hahaha. i don't think anyone is motivated to clean. i just do it mechanically. with four kids whirling around, i just attack the tasks and just do what I can tackle, and leave the rest to maid service.

Luisa - posted on 11/12/2009

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I feel the same way too! I feel like all I do all day, between my 2 kids, my business at home.. cleaning is the last thing I want to do, but .. if not me this will be a disaster.. so I do a little everyday, but on saturday or sunday a do a good deep clean so I know that tday is clean up day..so do it on your on pace

Christine - posted on 11/12/2009

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Yes I feel like that as well I come home from the bus stop from dropping the oldest off to catch the bus and I come home and the little one wants to watch a movie the same ones over and over, and I get tired of watching it and then before you know it I am awake to mom the movie is over. So Y a I know what you mean, but thanks to a great husband I have that helps out alot

Stephanie - posted on 11/12/2009

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try 1-2 chores a day spread them over the week so they dont pile up....but i think everyone get's this way.... i do... at least one week out of a month...lol

Jodi - posted on 11/12/2009

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We are in the same boat! I feel SO lazy, all I want to do is play with my daughter and forget about the household chores! Then, they pile up so bad I get overwhelmed and have no idea where to start! I'm in the process of making a schedule with little bits of cleaning throughout the day so that by the end of the day I don't have a pile of unfinished chores and by the end of the week more than I can chew. Good luck! I think it's normal personally, the average housewife spends 80 hours a week on household chores, not including child care. We have a right to not want to do it...we work overtime!

Katrina - posted on 11/12/2009

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I have 3 boys that I stay at home with.. I definetly find it easier to make a schedule each day of what needs to be done and do it throughout the day instead of trying to get it done all at once. I also try to give the kids something to do while I'm going to do some cleaning.. Whether it's coloring books or I will have them sweep the floor with the broom (that actually keeps them for a good while) and I have given them wash clothes to clean walls or the floor (even tho their not:P) but it makes them feel like their helping out also and they enjoy too.. It's definetly hard to get motivated but usually after you get things done you feel good about what was done!

Dianne - posted on 11/12/2009

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Oh my goodness - took the words right out of my mouth!
I am so happy that someone else feels the same way!!

Terri - posted on 11/12/2009

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CRANK up the music & dance & whistle/sing while you work - that's what I do...♥

Anita - posted on 11/12/2009

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I feel the same way. Plus I have the added stress of having to care for my grandmother, who seems to always want me to take her somewhere. I don't have any privacy in my home, but every time I leave the house, she HAS to tag along, so I don't even get any alone time at home. My husband does more chores than I do, bless him. Plus, my grandmother lets me know everything that I've done wrong-sometimes I think I even breathe wrong to her, so I just don't feel like do anything if it's not gonna be right anyway!

Arwen - posted on 11/12/2009

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Who likes chores? LOL I get that way all the time. It's hard to get up day after day knowing the first things you need to do are cooking, dishes, and laundry. Then it's time to keep the floors religiously clean so junior doesn't get sick when he or she decides it's fun to lick them. More cooking, more dishes, extra work when people drop in... It's a lot of work to get yourself psyched up for.

Courtney - posted on 11/12/2009

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Are you guys sure we aren't living the others lives in some kinda parallel universe? LMBO.  I am the same way Samantha.  I can't believe how actually much we have in common right down to the smallest detail.  Hairy scary stuff. HEHE!!

 



Quoting Samantha:



Quoting Marianna:

What a relief to find you all!!! I live in the middle of NOWHERE with my friends and family 10 hours away and we decided to have a baby. Now I am a SAHM with an eight month old. She sleeps all night and most of the day but I still feel that I never have enough time/energy to do anything- housework, laundry, shaving (getting kinda furry). I devote all of my love and attention to my child and have completely lost touch with myself. I have gained more weight than I did during pregnancy. I don't shower as often cause I don't go anywhere or do anything- I live in the BOONIES. I don't feel sexy anymore due to my lack of a figure which affects the sex life and my self esteem/confidence. Without drugs, I need a change. I need a motivator. I am glad this app exists and that some other wonderful moms out there are going through the same emotions. I look forward to reading more posts but it is already 1 am AGAIN. Geez.






I seriously feel like we are the same person. I weigh 20 lbs more than I did at 9 motnhs preg. i am trying to lose the weight but I feel like its just one more thing to add to my list. I live in a small town(that my husband grew up in) where I dont know many people. I have little motivation to do anything(shower, wear anything but sweats...) most days i dont even do my hair. I just pull it up. Then I have self esteem problems around my husband. i dont even get dressed in front of him anymore, much less have a sex life! I hate it. Depression is setting in. Trying to do better but its so hard! Its good to have a place where I can talk to people about what I'm going through.





 

Samantha - posted on 11/12/2009

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Quoting Marianna:

What a relief to find you all!!! I live in the middle of NOWHERE with my friends and family 10 hours away and we decided to have a baby. Now I am a SAHM with an eight month old. She sleeps all night and most of the day but I still feel that I never have enough time/energy to do anything- housework, laundry, shaving (getting kinda furry). I devote all of my love and attention to my child and have completely lost touch with myself. I have gained more weight than I did during pregnancy. I don't shower as often cause I don't go anywhere or do anything- I live in the BOONIES. I don't feel sexy anymore due to my lack of a figure which affects the sex life and my self esteem/confidence. Without drugs, I need a change. I need a motivator. I am glad this app exists and that some other wonderful moms out there are going through the same emotions. I look forward to reading more posts but it is already 1 am AGAIN. Geez.



I seriously feel like we are the same person. I weigh 20 lbs more than I did at 9 motnhs preg. i am trying to lose the weight but I feel like its just one more thing to add to my list. I live in a small town(that my husband grew up in) where I dont know many people. I have little motivation to do anything(shower, wear anything but sweats...) most days i dont even do my hair. I just pull it up. Then I have self esteem problems around my husband. i dont even get dressed in front of him anymore, much less have a sex life! I hate it. Depression is setting in. Trying to do better but its so hard! Its good to have a place where I can talk to people about what I'm going through.

Courtney - posted on 11/12/2009

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OMG.. I say everyone who is in relative proximity to each other should all pile in and start a Help A Mommy club. LOL. We could all just help clean each others houses. LMBO. We'd be in good company to say the very least. Glad to meet you ladies and know that I'm not just lazy, but just overworked and underpaid in the area of being a SAHM!! :)

Nichola - posted on 11/12/2009

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I hear all of you, great to know i'm not the only one. lol......It is hard getting motivated when all of your energy goes into entertaining a little person through the day, when my 11month old goes to bed I usually have to drag myself to the washing machine or vacuume cleaner resisting sitting down for some time to myself to do the things that are needing doing. So dissapointing when you have to do to all over again the following day too. :)

Ashley - posted on 11/12/2009

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every day its horrible! i dont know how to motivate myself to get anything done! especially when i know my daughter is going to destroy the house within minutes anyways.

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I feel that same way you do. It is even worse after you have a clean house and then you make diner and your kitchen is now a mess or you husband comes home and makes a mess. I feel your pain!

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Definetly feel the same way. I slack on housework a lot. Sometimes I'm just not in the mood to clean & I let it go. It's okay to do nothing at all sometimes. When things pile up just take it one thing at a time. It's nice that my husband helps me out a lot, he's a Saint :) I give him chores that I won't do like cleaning the toilet, taking the trash out, cooking meals a few days a week & doing the dishes(until he buys me a dishwasher he can do them). We like to keep it 50/50. I'm not much of a multitasker so I get overwhelmed when I have to much to do. Thank God for my wonderful husband :)

Felicity - posted on 11/12/2009

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all the time! i try and do bits when my daughter is napping or having telly time, but most of the time i feel like just relaxing then or reading! i have found it easier to do a big clean at the weekend when my partner is off work to play with my daughter then in the week i only have to do little bits just to keep on top of things. dont worry too much though everyone is the same! being a mum can be exhausting!

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