Stephanie - posted on 05/02/2011 ( 3 moms have responded )
I could write a whole story about how things are goin but I'll try keeping it brief.
i started feeling a little depressed a few months ago, I've been a stay at home mom for a little over two years now. I have a 26month old little boy, and a 7 month old little girl. I love my kids like nothing eles, Id do anything for them but lately I feel so selfish. I get fusterated so easily, im tired all the time, I live in a small town of maybe 3000 people, theres no where to go and nothing to do, It rains ALLL the time, I feel trapped.
My husband works from 5 in the morning till 6 at night, theres not much time for us let alone sometime for me unless i want to stay up till 9 or 10 (after ive put the kids to bed an tided up) Id rather just sleep.
Things got better for a little while, I started meeting up with some old friends after the kids an husband where in bed. I felt happier, there wasnt this empty feeling anymore. Then my husband got jealous, and got angrey with me for going an visiting friends.. he said I was "neglecting my kids an him" which is rediculous cuz they were all in bed. I stopped going an meeting with people, I stopped having people over because I just felt guilty, I couldnt enjy myself without thinking about what i was goin to come home to or what i would hear the next day when he got home.
Im only 22 but Ive always known i wanted to be a young mom, this was a choice i made for my self, but at times I feel like maybe i should have waited a little longer, did the selfish young ME time.
The hardest part is that no one around me seems to understand how i feel. All i get is a shoulder shrug an a " oh your just being silly"
I dont know what im really expecting from this post, I just needed some where to vent. Sometimes talking to strangers is better then talking to close family or friends.