Is it ok if mom gets "me time" sometimes?
MOST HELPFUL POSTS
Elizabeth - posted on 08/06/2010
yes mothers need me time. it doesn't matter to me if it is alone "me time" or with the girls doing what I WANT TO DO! last week I needed "me time" so we went to the mall cause I wanted too. We all have hard days, easy days, lazy days. But with out our "me time" we can grow very bitter and impatient. Hope you get some "me time" hun God bless
Jane - posted on 08/06/2010
Beyond "ok", it's essential. Mental health demands that you retain your personhood. :)
With seven kids, I get "me time" when DH gives the kids an "All Daddy Night" - they play videogames, I spend the time in the bathroom soaking in the tub, mani-pedi, whatever. Or go out for coffee with the girls.
Michelle - posted on 08/19/2010
I have 5 kids and enjoy me time currently than the other minds who have posted. Whilemany of them enjoy bein.g with girlfriends, I like to be with my husband...we go out on a weekly date. Not only does it recharge and relax, but we are strengthening our marriage, the foundation for a strong family.
Susan - posted on 08/17/2010
Yes! Yes its important otherwise your going to burnt out and tired. and when your like that your not giving your best to your children. Like all mums love my kids to bits but need time out to be me, that girl I was before i had them. Just small things like going to a movie or out for dinner it just helps.
All mams should have some "me time". An overworked, stressed-out mam isn't good, so destressing and relaxing at regular intervals is essential. Obviously it's much harder for the single mams to find that time, but even some time to yourself whilst the children are in bed will help =]
Jennifer - posted on 08/20/2010
Heck yeah! If you don't have me time you aren't refreshed. It took me a while to feel like I could take me time I felt guilty. If my husband didn't get a break at work why should I at home, but I then realized I was a better mom and wife when I even just took a 1/2 hour out of my day to do NOTHING or whatever I felt cleared my head and relaxed me. I am a WAHM now with five kids and so balancing time is a skill I am aquiring more and more but essential to have "Mommy Time" to simply be a better YOU!
Kathleen - posted on 08/20/2010
I personally think all moms and dads need "me" time as long as it is a responsible period of time. Time to read, time to watch YOUR favorite program or time to share with friends. I think it's important to grow, to recharge your batteries. kathy mulhair
Linda - posted on 08/19/2010
I am a MUCH better Mommy after I've had a chance to recharge with a little "me time!" My best friend and I have "Mom Dates" where we go out to eat, window shop or see a movie together. I have 4 boys, age 9 mos to 10 years, and I'm a stay at home mom. I adore them and love to be with them, but EVERYONE needs a break sometimes. Plus, the kids miss me when I'm gone and maybe appreciate Mom a bit when she gets back! ; )
Tabitha - posted on 08/19/2010
Im still trying to figure out how to get me time... My baby is 10 months old and I have 2 teenage boys..My husband believes that being at home all day with baby and not working is "me time" enough.... LO is in the stage where she is waking back up again 3-4 times a night and I am living on 2-3 hours sleep a day.... I am starting to feel resentful and angry all the time... I guess this is just something that I will have to deal with.....
Stephanie - posted on 08/18/2010
Not only is it okay, it is imperative to the welfare of your family to get "me" time. What good are you to your family if you are overwhelmed, run down and over worked all the time? I am a homeschooling sahm of 4 (1 is an adult 2 are teens 1 is a toddler). I take a 10 to 15 minute me time break each day and the rule is noone is to come to my office door if they are not on fire, profusely bleeding or missing any limbs! My teens do a great job looking after the baby during that time and our day runs more smoothly. My husband has every Friday off, he takes the kids and I have the entire day to myself. This is my mani/pedi and shopping day. It's also equally important to have couple time. Hubby and I have a date night every Thursday night. A romantic dinner out, no kids allowed. We've been doing that for the past 10 years. My kids have a content and happy mother and parents who are as much in love as they were 19 years ago and my hubby has a happy wife. It's a win/win situation for everyone (LOL)!!!
Maggie - posted on 08/18/2010
YES!! in fact, you cannot be the best mom you can be without it. you have to "recharge" in order to keep up with your kids. it isn't selfish, it is actually keeping yourself healthy and providing your children with the best mom you can.
Me time is important, as you've read a lot to answer your question. My "me time" sometimes is when the boys are napping or down for quiet time, I'll go sit on the deck outside with one of my projects or book. I may not be able to get away from my boys for the whole day but 2 hours is a good recharging for me and the bottle of wine at night when DH gets home. When the boys are down for quiet time I do not clean or do laundry and try to stay off the computer, that's why I go outside where it's quiet and the boys don't hear me moving around the house then asking if they can get up.
Kristin - posted on 08/18/2010
Absolutely! Why should everyone else get time alone when mom doesn't? Seems to me that if you can't have it, they can't either. Even if it's just 20 minutes in the tub or a pedi at the mall, you deserve to have time with out the demands of childhood pressing down on you.
Chelsea - posted on 08/18/2010
oh hell yea girl! read a book, go for a walk, watch a movie, go take a nap, play a computer game, cook for fun, go on a girls date, when you have the chance! i dont like asking my mom in law to watch my baby, but its worth it when you come back refreshed ready to take on another week at a time, and my mom in law is fine with it, and encourages it to, cus she can tell when i get stir crazy, and mother+ stircrazy= not happy momma. dont feel guilty. just dont.
Sharyn - posted on 08/18/2010
OM gosh, my daughter is 20 months old and my only child for now and i have yet to have a ME day ...... not that its my hubby's fault, his work schedule just doesnt coordinate well with my day so ... no ME time for me for now ..... and yeah i do need it badly.
Susan - posted on 08/18/2010
Of course it is. My friend is a single mother and has a 5 year old daughter. She also works at a day care so she never gets any me time. She was telling me about 2 weeks ago that it would be nice to have that time. So when saturday came around I picked up the daughter and we went garage saling. We had a great time and my friend had a nice quiet time at home. After about an hour she was missing her daughter. We were out for about 3 to 3 and a half hours. I needed a little grandma time too. So we both benefitted. Always try for at least once a month for a full day or a few hours. Its a very healthy thing to do for you.
Jennifer - posted on 08/18/2010
absolutely!!!!! i get out 3 times a week to go for a walk with one of my girlfriends for an hour, we vent, pray, and talk about anything and everything, and its after our kids are in bed, so we can enjoy our time and not feel guilty! It's amazing! :D
Teresa - posted on 08/17/2010
You're all right gorgeous moms. It's part of the responsibility-to take care of ourselves as well. You all have given me the inspiration to write my recent article at http://blog.clariity.com/, entitled:
Best Moms’ Rule Number 1: Anticipate Your System Down.
In case I've forgotten some of your inputs, feel free to post your comments. I'm looking forward for your opinions.
Sammie - posted on 08/17/2010
All moms should have some me time.. If you dont you would go crazy.. I love my son and being a stay at home mom, but every once in awhile I need a little me time or date night with my husband to be.. I just think there is a big difference between a little night out with friends or a date night, than always saying you need me time and are gone every weekend..
Aimee - posted on 08/17/2010
of course!! its very important in my opinion that we get me time. Thats the only way to stay sane. I love my children and i love being a stay at home mom. but everyones a break sometimes and time to remember theres more to you then being a mom. dont feel guilty about it either.. If i never had me time i would probably rip my hair out lol
Tiffany - posted on 08/17/2010
EVERY mom should have some 'me time'. I have a hard time getting any but if I get to the point where I'm ridiculously over stressed, then it's not good for my daughter. You should definitely take some 'me time' every now and then. I personally think a Mom should get at least 30 minutes a day to herself, even though I know that is unrealistic lol. Good Luck, and make sure you get your 'me time' in! You deserve it!
Teresa - posted on 08/17/2010
it's not just OK. It is a MUST and ESSENTIAL. All moms need to recharge not just for yourself but for your family most especially. Stress and system down are inevitable, no matter how much our will power is.
-from Teresa, writer of Best Moms’ Rule Number 1: Anticipate Your System Down
Bridget - posted on 08/17/2010
ALWAYS... during the week i will go to my inlaws while my husband is at work and get my mother in law to watch the kids for like an hour even if i just got and walk around a store or something. But YES moms ALWAYS need me time.
Candace - posted on 08/17/2010
it is very much ok for the moms to get "me time" after all the hard work we do, not much fathers get how it is and you do need time for yourself every once in a while or as you need it, not all moms are the same and need the same amount of 'me time' or you could/might get too stressed and your baby might be able to sense it and get stressed as well and which would make it worse for you, my friend was able to get 'me time' with her baby and her baby is a few months old and she got a week, i havent exactly gotten my 'me time' just yet, well not that long, i have been staying at home with my baby and she is now 2years old today and i hope you get the answers you are looking for =) hope you have a good day and take care =)
Erin - posted on 08/17/2010
It is absolutely essential for moms to get "Me Time" and even "girl time" on occasion. Women literally need that for our well-being. And it certainly doesn't need to be elaborate like taking off for a weekend. Even if it's nothing more than five minutes in a hot bath when the kids are asleep, you definitely have to give yourself time to be alone.
How can you expect to take care of family if you've never taken care of yourself? You have nothing to give to them if you are a wreck.
Toni - posted on 08/17/2010
YES!!!!!! A mom needs me time! Think of it as recharging your battery. If you don't have that, you get drained and unhappy. Even if it is just a few hours a week, it needs to happen.
It took me 6 years to make it happen for myself, and I am so much happier now. My husband and I even get along better. I usually only take a few hours a week. Sometimes more, sometimes less, but it is mine!
I have 3 boys btw. One will be 7 in less than a month. The other 2 are 4 and 5 months. My oldest son was 6 and my second was 2 and I was so mentally drained when I finally got some time for me. I miss my kids when I am out and I am ready to see them when I get home, but I love just being able to do nothing for a few hours if that is what I choose to do.
I hope you get to have some you time soon! Enjoy every minute of it!!!
Ave - posted on 08/17/2010
my husband has offered me that but i haven't really taken "me time" because i don't want to be so far from my son, and if i have spent some time with my friend my husband has been somewhere close with our son, and after i feel quilty for not being with him :(
Trisha - posted on 08/16/2010
YES! of course it is, we need time to ourselves , i have two days aweek to myself so that their grandmother *who lives where my hubby works* can see them,and when these days come around i clean the house or i hang out with friends we all need a little me time,or we just might lose it sometimes, so no worries dont feel bad just enjoy it if u can get it :)
Kristi - posted on 08/14/2010
I actually bought myself an ipod this summer and uploaded a bunch of my favourite songs - my younger brother came over to do that for me actually - and if I cannot get some 'ME' time I take the kids out in the stroller and listen to my ipod. It is a bit of an escape - plus the fresh air is good for everyone!
Michelle - posted on 08/14/2010
I totally agree that you absolutely need me time, i feel i dont get enuf really. I have 3 boys (8,6 and 4) and have 3 jobs working around kids and my husband plus keeping up with housework and washing, it is so stressful! I like to go out with the girls to let my hair down but it doesnt happen often enuf for my liking due to either money or time. Only 1 set of parents are willing to have the boys and i cant keep asking em as they wont have time for theirselves as they both run their own businesses! The other set of parents always seem to have excuses i reckon, and 1 of em works part time the other not at all. It gets me so wound up, you would think they would want to spend time with their grandkids. So going out as a couple is happens rarely,altho saying that we are going out tonight as my parents are having the boys overnight even tho theyv just spent 2 whole weeks in Fuerterventura with us! See they are good. Always try to find time or you wont feel like you can cope with your kids.x
Lea - posted on 08/13/2010
Oh, yes! You bet. If I don't get in some "me time" I'm not very nice to my husband or my kids. As the mother you need time to relax and recharge and have time just to think and remember to appreciate why you do what you do...which is being a mom. It does not mean you love your children any less, it does not mean you are being selfish.
Brandy - posted on 08/13/2010
Yes it is great to have me time. Every mom needs it. When my husband was deployed a year ago another wife from his unit me and her became friends. She introduced me to "Me" days. We would pick one day a month. Right after I would get my 6 year old off on the school bus. Go home get a shower dressed. Get my 1 year old dressed and ready. Take him to the sitters across the street and we would go to a outlet mall or get our nails and feet done, shopping, lunch, and then tanning bed. But we would be home by the time school was over. I would feel so relaxed like I took a break.
Jennifer - posted on 08/13/2010
yes its is alright I think its need to stay sane lol my husband gives me time but my mom is the big helper she babysits sometimes. Its great because just until recently we were living far away from family (military husband) so I did not get much me time it was well over due since hubby was gone most of the time
Amber - posted on 08/13/2010
I would die without some baby-free, man-free time! Go coocoo for cocoa puffs! I am fortunate my mom takes my daughter, sometimes for a whole weekend, and I can run, watch tv, read, or whatever I want. If i don't get a break every now and then I start to get snappy and impatient and quick-tempered (I should work on that, I know). I definitely relish the chance to unwind and recharge, even though I cherish the priceless time I spend with my daughter. I find that I can't be the best Mommy and wife for my family unless I get to be just me, too.
Ruth - posted on 08/13/2010
I don't often get a whole day off from being mommy--but a few hours when I go to church activities, or go exercise with friends. Sometimes a few minutes are all I need--often all I want is a chance to use the restroom without a curious and interested audience.
Also, while I do some housework during my daughter's nap, I also try to take some time for myself--listen to the radio while I fold laundry, sit and read a book (and often as not, take a short nap), or work on one of my sewing projects. I've also decided that, once my daughter goes to bed, I don't clean the house any more for the day. The evening is a time for me and my husband to relax, either together or apart.
Julia - posted on 08/13/2010
you HAVE to have some me time otherwise you will go crazy! every saturday morning my husband takes my 15 month old son and they go grocery shopping together. and even little things like getting your shower in when your husband gets home so he can have some play time. my husband is in the military so he is gone quite a bit and realizes I NEED my time. shopping getting my hair done, whatever. And every morning when he gets home from PT he gets up with my son ( who usually sleeps until 8:30 or 9 ) feeds him and changes him so lets me sleep in until he leaves for work :)
Join Circle of Moms
Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.Join Circle of Moms