Just thought I would say...

Jennifer - posted on 03/29/2010

Slavery was abolished years and years ago.I am a stay at home mom and my husband does help around the house.He does not do much of cleaning but he helps.He does change diapers and he SHOULD change DIAPERS! He is the father!!!People that think that should be slaves for their husbands are quite Crazy!!!!We are full-time moms and I agree with the fact that ou men should be able to relax when they come home form work, but their is a certain extent.We should be able to relax and not only when the kids are sleeping.We should have a break when the guys comme home.I do love my stay at home mom.But I would hate to have a stay at home life like Yours!!!

Jennifer - posted on 03/29/2010

Slavery was abolished years and years ago.I am a stay at home mom and my husband does help around the house.He does not do much of cleaning but he helps.He does change diapers and he SHOULD change DIAPERS! He is the father!!!People that think that should be slaves for their husbands are quite Crazy!!!!We are full-time moms and I agree with the fact that ou men should be able to relax when they come home form work, but their is a certain extent.We should be able to relax and not only when the kids are sleeping.We should have a break when the guys comme home.I do love my stay at home mom.But I would hate to have a stay at home life like Yours!!!

Kandace - posted on 03/29/2010

amen

Sarra - posted on 03/29/2010

correct me if im wrong but wasn't slavery abolished? Ur freaking nuts lady!

Kandace - posted on 03/29/2010

ok i agree that getting mad at him for not cleaning the house or cooking and what not but i get upset when my husband ignores the children and me. and when a man will not help with the CHILDREN then i have a problem. I dont get upset with him if the dishes arent done or the laundry didnt get folded. i get upset when our two year old is standing in front of him fussing wanting him to play with him and instead he yells at him to get out of the way of the tv so he can play his video game.

Stephanie - posted on 03/29/2010

Jennifer, that sounds like a good trade off to me. : ) Every situation is different and you have to work hard to make it work. I have to commend you for breastfeeding your twins and making their baby food- that kind of devotion & dedication is so awesome. : )

Jennifer - posted on 03/29/2010

Maybe for you, but this works for me: I breastfeed my 9 month old twins, make all of their baby food, used my savings to purchase an expensive peice of heavy machinery so that we could start up our own company, let our dog in and out to potty all day, and occasionally make dinner for him. My hubby, on the other hand, does not have to change diapers, give baths, or do crying/screaming babies in the middle of the night. He never gets up with me at night if they are sick, hungery, or just want to be held it's ALL on me, and has been since they were two weeks old. So, he works during the day, gets home and cooks us dinner, cleans up the kitchen, folds the laundry I've done, vaccums the livingroom, and takes out the trash. He showers, watches the news, and by 10pm HE is happily asleep, but I am busy doing laundry and pumping. He gets 9 hrs of solid sleep/night, and gets "satisfied" on occasion, IF i have had a chance during the week to shower, and maybe even shave my legs!!! I think that's a damn fair trade, and neither one of us are complaining. I don't bitch about him too much, and he doesn't bitch about me, so I say for now, it's working! He ADORES me, and I ADORE him, and it has nothing to do with what I do or do not do domestically.

Lori - posted on 03/29/2010

I agree, very well said ,Grace!

Ashley=) - posted on 03/29/2010

Dana is entitled to her own opinion moms as we all are, so down off the high stools and play nicely.lol.:-)

Grace - posted on 03/29/2010

Thanks Stephanie. I just read through every post before I posted initially and I don't think anyone said what I said. We simply come here for advice and support. And to feel that we're not alone.

Jessica - posted on 03/29/2010

Oh and that it is quite amusing :-)

Jessica - posted on 03/29/2010

wow. that's all I have to say bouts this thread. just wow.

Lori - posted on 03/29/2010

Hi Elisabeth,
I agree that people can sometimes take the complaining about their husbands overboard. I personally love my husband to death, but if I didn't have the ability to vent then life would be a lot more unpleasant for both of us. That being said, I talk to my friends and family about those things and they help me decide how to broach the subject with him. That's just how it works for me though! Sometimes I don't have the option to talk to my husband at all because he is in the Army and is gone a lot.
Unfortunately, what is getting more attention (than what I think you had intended to be discussed) is your suggestions to complainers. I am glad that your lifestyle makes you happy. Sometimes people don't feel happy with the way things are going for them and I agree that maybe a change is in order. I hate to say that if you don't want to get replies like the ones that you did, you can't put it out there! You are lucky that the ladies here are so nice, actually... There are times when I took a problem or an opinion to forums and was totally ripped asunder!
That being said, I have always struggled with being a housewife and just recently becoming a stay at home mom. I live in Germany, because that is where my husband is stationed and since I don't speak German, there aren't many options for employment for me. I was working on a music degree, but that too, is something that I can't accomplish here. My point being, that every person's situation is unique.
I believe very adamantly that marriage and parenthood is a two way street. I know that isn't doable all the time... Like you, my husband spends a lot of time away ( he has done two deployments one 7 months and one 12 months, and is away for schools and training) so I understand how easy it is to get in the habit of doing everything, and wanting him to come home and just be with the kiddo. =) my husband just got home from his last deployment and he is having to jar me out of my routine so that he can do some things!
As for the religion thing... I don't agree at all, Shannon (hope I spelled that right) but I am happy that you have found something to believe in that gives you comfort and purpose.
As for all the mess with replies...The only advice that I can give you is try not to take everything people say to heart... Hear the underlining message, and leave the rest. People only get nasty, mostly, because you will never see them face to face. Always keep an open mind, because sometimes the people who are saying hurtful things, only say them because they have been there. And if it ever gets to be too much, delete or lock the thread! Reading replies can sometimes be a nerve racking experience, especially since you can't change your initial posts and a lot of people don't back read. Thanks for posting

Stephanie - posted on 03/29/2010

Very well said, Grace. : )

Grace - posted on 03/29/2010

I think that one reason that there is some venting about husbands on here is so that the women can get advice on what to do to hopefully better their relationship with their husband and have a better home life. We all come from different backgrounds and having different ways of living. But i think that we all basically want the same things. A fulfilling and happy relationship with our husbands and children, as well as being happy ourselves. We came here for support and ideas, to have a connection with the outside world. There is no one 'right' way to live your life. But the advice and ideas you can get from other women who are in the same type of situation can open your eyes to new things that you can try.

I am sure I may have said somethings about my husband on here. But when I did, I was looking for advice on what I should do to improve things. Most of the advice given my moms on here has been 'talk with your husband about the way you are feeling' And then advice on what to say and how to say it. Marriage is hard. Not everyone grew up in a home where they had good examples of how a marriage should work, as a partnership. This is why there are marriage counselors. But by coming here and getting a little advice and maybe by trying out some of the things mentioned, a relationship could improve and then there is no reason to spend money on a counselor.

Recently I have been feeling quite poorly. Not sleeping very well at all, feeling bad about myself in all aspects. It was really eating at me for a while. Finally I talked to my husband about it. Told him that I'd like it is he'd remind me how much he loves me sometimes, even though I do know that he does love me... Or remind me that I am special to him. We discussed my trouble sleeping, as it was bothering him too. And he has taken steps to help me with that problem. He's been taking more initiative with our daughter when I need the help.

In everybody's relationship there is always room for improvement. My parents have been married for 35 years, and they still have things that they work on improving every day.

I hope that after everyone reads this thread they will go hug their children and give their husband a kiss and tell them all that you love them.

Melanie - posted on 03/29/2010

I hope your husband appreciates all your hard work. It is very nice for men to be greeted at the door by you and/or the kids with smiles and hugs. My husband once told me that that was his favorite part of the day. Whatever works for you, works for you. period. I just hope for the sake of your marriage things aren't as perfect as you have made them to appear. Men get very bored with perfection and having everything taken care of within the house. They may feel they aren't needed. I hope you ask him to read to the kids, play with the kids, change the lightbulbs, cut the grass, take out the trash. If he truely does do Nothing, please start giving him things to do, the things that MEN should do.

Chatty - posted on 03/29/2010

Arian: I'm having a great time and I'm not being a bitch! Sorry you don't feel the same but I can't understand why you'd feel the need to resort to name calling when we've gotten this far without it?

Stephanie - posted on 03/29/2010

Yes Dana, ignoring you is what I plan to do. You do quite well at showing your mentality and education level all on your own. You don't need me to point it out.

Jessica - posted on 03/29/2010

Oh and as for the men and women aren't equal/should do different jobs bit... yeah f-ing right lol! There is no way you can say that men are better at some jobs than women, and vice versa. You know what? My fiance is better at laundry, cleaning, and even cooking (sometimes) than me lol.

But, his mom raised them coming from a very traditional/women should be subservient attitude (his dad wasn't in the picture; thats just how she is). Like, she thinks that women should be the ones doing laundry, cooking etc. Well DF turned out fine, but his brothers wouldn't know what to do without a woman around and that is SAD. The one can't even cook mac n cheese, and the other is 20 and does not know how to do his own laundry. I'm serious! He still lives at home, and she does his freaking laundry for him instead of making him do it. And he has the gall to complain to her when it isn't done on time. That's embarassing!

Brandy - posted on 03/29/2010

My fiance loves helping me out on the weekends. It makes him feel good about himself. I tell him to stop because I feel bad that I didn't accomplish everything that week, but he says he likes doing it and is going to keep doing it. He does what he wants after work. But sometimes, he cooks dinner. He will tell me usually the night before "I am going to make something for you to try tomorrow" and I will take out or go buy what he needs to make it and let him make it. He likes to make me dinner every once in a while and I give him praise no matter how disgusting I find the meal. I don't ask him to do things around the house, but I'm not going to stop him from doing it either. I think every family should do what works for them. Not every man's idea of happy is watching his wife run around doing the same thing every day, never changing, never doing anything for themselves again. My fiance likes to be involved in every part of our family, even the tedious parts. We do things together as a team and have fun and play and laugh while we do them and we are very happy and have a great understanding of each other's needs and do our best to meet them and we usually find each other exceding those needs. A great relationship takes two people. Elisabeth: One thing that really bothered me is your comment about how they will be less likely to be unfaithful if we play the perfect housewife role. It sounds like you have some really deep insecurities. If any man is going to cheat on me because I didn't do the dishes that day last week, or got up late so I gave him money to buy lunch instead this morning, then he is not worth my time.

Arian - posted on 03/29/2010

Dana you ARE being a jerk and it DOES take the fun out of this for a person to be that way. But, I guess their's an @$$hole in every crowd. You'd be the one. Get a life and stop being a bitch.

Chatty - posted on 03/29/2010

P.S. It seems more like elementary school......what grade are you in? ;)

Chatty - posted on 03/29/2010

LMAO! I'm not bitter AT ALL! And I'm not trying to provoke ANYTHING!

I can comment on ANYTHING I like and it's none of your concern.

Carly - posted on 03/29/2010

I do agree with alot of your statement but then I disagree with parts. I think there is an equal balance in relationships with how much effort both partners should put in. Your at one end of the scale and the people you are complaining about are at the other end. I personally don't think either is healthy, it's a hard job raising children and looking after them all day, then having an entire household to clean makes everything more difficult and tiring so yeah I think a man should pull his weight a little bit. But I also think a man should be entitiled to come home and relax but on off days and holidays I think there should be some pitching in wether it's doing the dishes, washing etc.. after all we are not maids here to service our partners/husbands. They are fully capable of doing certain things for themselves and I also think there is certain jobs around a house that are a man's job, not a womans. I don't like D.I.Y or gardening, not that I couldn't do it, I'd just be extremley useless and most men have a knack for that kinda thing you no? Like I said before it's best to find an equal balance & people that complain to a site about there hubs/partners really need to look at there relationship hard and think wether they're happy. I would never ever dream of coming on here and be-litteling my husband to strangers because he is the father of my children and as much as he can get on my nerves I still love him with all my heart and any problems I do have, I take it up with him not vent about it to a site.

Stephanie - posted on 03/29/2010

This isn't high school, Dana.

Stephanie - posted on 03/29/2010

Wow Dana, you just seem to be a very bitter person. Did I say "TO DANA" anywhere in my posts??? I was speaking generally, not only about this topic but others. I feel sorry for you and with you it seems that you want to provoke an arguement by your aggression. How do you know what I've read or haven't??? You don't! You have NO IDEA! And, where did I "defend" anyone? You are the one who needs to get the facts straight and learn how to read. Most people here are just moms talking about mom related things but it looks like you are looking for a fight everywhere you go. If that's what you're into there are plenty of other places on the net where that is acceptable. I made my first comment to Elisabeth, not you, and I can comment on ANYTHING I like and it's none of your concern. Now move on.

Chatty - posted on 03/29/2010

Stephanie you said.....

Come on ladies, please be nice & respectful.

Be as opinionated at you want but don't be mean and snickering or making rude comments about someone's religious beliefs is mean.

I'm not on any "side" in this, I'm just putting my 2 cents in.

Amber - posted on 03/29/2010

i completely agree with you... CCR clean cook & reproduce!!!!!

Shannon - posted on 03/29/2010

Wow.. People get so bent over simple topics.. :-)

YES, I threw religion into the mix.. I ALWAYS do!

Yes, I thought Dana's comment about it was funny, only because we know how each other are. I'm always bringing up God, & she is always rolling her eyes at me. We have an unspoken agreement to disagree & still be liked by the other.. :-)

I enjoy being my husband's "servant," (well, most of the time) because I feel it's the right way to live. I'm not asking you to follow me. Just sharing a bit of who I am. ♥

Stephanie - posted on 03/29/2010

I don't understand why people are complaining about the ones who speak about religion. That's their right. You say what you want so everyone else can, too. Some of you say that Elisabeth's post was offensive yet you aren't exactly being nice & polite. Come on ladies, please be nice & respectful. When you're mean it takes the fun out of this. Be as opinionated at you want but don't be mean and snickering or making rude comments about someone's religious beliefs is mean.

Ashley=) - posted on 03/29/2010

All i hear is what you have to do to make him happy....it takes two to keep a marriage alive any relationship..I'm lucky i don't have to nag,my boyfriend takes it upon himself to do things without being asked and we have a happy relationship we haven't married but we have a equal relationship with effort from both sides.....but a relationship is about both people making each other happy and an equal effort from both sides..my boyfriend wouldnt be happy in a relationship like that as he would feel the same as i do we had children together and we bring them up together and keep a home together.



I understand you take it on your self to do that to keep a happy home ,happy children and husband and thats wonderful but what does your husband take upon himself for you..does he cook a meal for you or do something out of the ordinary to show you how much he loves and respects you as i am so sure he does..it takes more from a man other than just earn the money it takes someone special to see past that.I feel in my own opinion.Whether or not its a religious thing.Its not going to hurt to think out side the box just once in a while lol.



But again what works for you is different for someone else and whats key is a happy home full of love with caring parents and happy children.How we choose to do that is based on what sort of a relationship we choose to have with our loved one.

Denese - posted on 03/29/2010

Elisabeth. Thank you for your clarification on your post. I still found it offensive but at the same time you are intitled to your own opinion. I would have stated it differently and not intentionally or unintentionally offended and called-out so-to-speak so many mothers who are on this site. We can all always strive to be better at what we do and our marriages including ourselves. This will always be. This has unfortunately turned into a bashing and for that Im sorry. We should allsupport each other and with that is for the reason I would not have ever posted your statement as it was very demeaning to woman all around. But thats why we have forgiveness and a kind loving heart. Im happy that you are able to apply yourself to soo much around your house, your kids and your husband. That can truly be inspiring in the correct statement. I myself have a friend who can do soo much for her family and she inspires me but It doesnt work in my home for me and my husband. We make it work together for our own family and if it works for you honey then keep doing it. I do hope we can all decide to move on and continue supporting each other and forgive each other for the continued hurt and let it be what it was and not what it is anymore. We are all strong loving women and can come together and support one another as a whole. I do not believe we should be bashing each others beliefs either but rather rally together and support each other as moms as the cite was intended. May God bless you all and if you dont believe thats ok. My Jesus is my King and Im not ashamed nor should I be and nor should any of you be of your own faith. Cant wait to read some more and see the posts become encouraging to one another as we all have great and unique situation and the ability of husbands and familys to support one another accordingly. Have a great Monday. :-)

Stephanie - posted on 03/29/2010

Elisabeth- I agree with you. If this is what keep you & your family happy, then that's what you should do. I feel that working and earning the money is my husband's job, mine is to take care of our home and children. Yet, when he is at home he is with the children as much as I am. But, I am the one bathing, feeding, dressing, etc. them. I don't feel that is his job. Parenting the children is both of our jobs. Even though he isn't the one bathing them and doing the laundry he is still a father to them. He loves them and teaches them, plays with them, comforts them, etc. I take pride in keeping my home clean and organized. That makes me feel happy and accomplished and I do have time to do other things. Just because I like a clean house doesn't mean that cleaning is my whole life. It is just one aspect of it. I respect my husband so much for taking care of us. He works hard and we have a nice home and everything we need and more. Why shouldn't I make him feel the same way? Some people do have valid points when complaining / venting about their husbands, yet some are way out in left field. Take my sister, for example. Her boyfriend bought her a car and a home and he continued to live at his home bc he felt his family wouldn't approve of them living together. She partied, cheated and took drugs and constantly complained about him "not doing enough" and he "wouldn't put a ring on it", etc. He did so much for her but she was thankeless and did horrible things behind his back. A female "tool" is what she was. Now that they have a child he does live with her but she still constantly complains about everything he does when she doesn't have to work or do anything at all. She doesn't clean the house, she sleeps all the time, she's mean and very difficult to deal with, yet he STILL supports her. I guess my point is that when some women complain it's total bull crap bc look at this situation I'm telling you about. Sometimes the woman is the one who needs to get her act together. This is just an example of a woman who needs to stop complaining about her partner and dragging his name through the mud. I know that every situation is different. Alot of women have it really bad and just need someone to talk to, to vent their frustrations.



I'm not on any "side" in this, I'm just putting my 2 cents in. : )

Sandra - posted on 03/29/2010

Wow...that's all I have to say.

Danielle - posted on 03/29/2010

All i've got to say is what the hell????Am I in the 20s again???I work my duckin butt off!!!My boyfriend works his 9hr days and I have a source of income as well, but do not work. If you think that your husband will be faithful just because you make him dinner, etc YOUR INSANE!!!a man is a man and if they are going to cheat they are and it might not have anything to do with them being unhappy. I do not make him breakfast for the simple fact that it is 2am and I am up all night with my own problems because I am pregnant with our 2nd. I do clean, I do the dishes, I normally make him dinner, I go to school, and I take care of our son! I ask him to help because I NEED it. Just because I ask for a little bit of help once in a while (and it is truly once in a while) doesn't mean that i don't love my kids! Some people just can't handle kids ALL of the time! I need a little me time, which is normally during my school time. So, when do i get a break???Everyone needs a break sometime and I'm sure that YOU DO TOO!!! People bitch that's what they do, but most of the time it's just because they don't want to explode on their husband, kids, friends, etc. You sound like a pastor or something...I mean seriously come into the 21st century. I'm grateful that i can stay home with my kids because you need two sets of income at this day in age. My boyfriend and I are young but we understand everything about eachother and if there's a problem we work it out. We don't wait on eachother hand and foot because it would cause problems and then who would wait on our son and soon to be daughter......it just doesn't work for everyone..you do what you do because it works for YOU
i do what i do because it works for us
and people do what they do because it works for them
why do you feel the need to criticize someone else because they bitch once in a while???
WHO CARES!everyone has bad days and needs some help

Jessica - posted on 03/29/2010

I DO have an honest question for Elisabeth,or any of the others who posted who share those views: You make it your number one priority to make sure he's happy and taken care of. Does he do the same for you? Does he show you and tell you that he appreciates you? Take the kids for a little while so you can go out and be yourself for a bit? Cook your favorite meal or take you out to eat?

Because that's really how love works- you both have to be willing to sacrifice for the other. Its a two way road and if only one person is pulling their weight then its probably a bad situation, or will be eventually. Just curious!

Susan - posted on 03/29/2010

I am very lucky to have a husband who supports me and wants me to stay at home with our daughter. He works, a lot 5 a.m. to 1 p.m. M-F and sometimes on Saturday and Sunday. He understands how active our 18 month old is and knows that I may get the dishes done, I may not I may have one load of laundry going but not all of it. And he HELPS me when he gets home. Not because I ask him to but because he wants to. He knows that he isn't the only one "working" and that I rarely get a break from my work. At least one or two nights a week he even makes dinner. He plays with our daughter, does things with her, changes diapers, feeds her, reads to her...he's a great husband and I great father. When she was tiny he even roated the night shift with me and not because I asked him to, because he wanted to. I say thank you Jesus not all of us have husbands and beliefs that date back to ancient times. It's called PROGRESSION.

Nikki - posted on 03/29/2010

OMG I didn't read Shannon's post correctly, I thought she was being sarcastic! Don't even get me started on religion!

Medic - posted on 03/29/2010

Apparently it's a one way street in here, the original posters can be rude but god forbid anyone else have an opinion that does not line up with them. As for your husband being away your preaching to th choir my husband is military and has been gone more often than not and when he gets home he has to jump right in. If he wants a cold beer he knows where the fridge is and how to open it. He knows that I have to have a life so that I'm ok when he's gone and that life doesn't stop just because he is home. I have worked way to hard to be the person I am to throw it away to be a doormat, I was like this before I got married and apparently my husband liked it because he "put a ring on it". When we first started dating I told him I don't NEED to be with someone I WANT to be with you and I still feel the same way. I won't allow our three year old to be helpless so I will be damned if he suddenly is.

Rachel - posted on 03/29/2010

Just one other thing to add... Women go through a lot. I just recently found out I have Graves Disease... and if my husband wasn't willing to help me so much guess where I would be???? The hospital or a grave. This post is ridiculous and pointless. If you want to serve your husband go for it, but don't attack other people who are happy in love with people that work with them. Don't attack people who need help. Don't bad mouth people who need a venting session here and there. You are rude and irrational. I can't attack you in the way you live your life, but I feel sad for you.... it's sad that everybody comes before you. It feels so good to put yourself first once in a while and to have someone else do the same. Thank GOD for all the genuine and loving men out there who give women what they truly deserve. Do you realize what women do for society? Do you realize the importance of a woman? Do you realize that women use to be resepcted a lot more. Who knows... maybe God is a woman... we all know a man can't give birth. We are blessed to have what we have.... but we should also be respected and taken care of for going through what we go through. So some men go to work... work is done when it's over, work has no impact on what really matters in life. Work is just a means of getting by. They could change to whatever job they wanted and it still is just a way to put food on the table.... but who cooks it? Haha. Whatever my husband cooks dinner too because he loves and appreciates me :-) Our job is way more important. Money is not life. My family struggles with money... but we don't worry about it because we have eachother... and that's what matters.

Nikki - posted on 03/29/2010

I just have a question for you, what do you do to keep yourself happy? To me you seem like a door mat, I don't mean to be rude, but women have worked so hard over the past few decades to be treated with equal rights, not that I am a feminist, but I am a very strong woman, I could never live a submissive life style, I am a strong and healthy role model for my daughter, I want her to be happy with herself and be confident in her ability to get out of life what she wants before she settles down and to never compromise her beliefs, to have enough self esteem to stand up for her own true happiness. My nanna would be very sad to hear that this crap is still going on today!

Chatty - posted on 03/29/2010

Elisabeth! You forgot to comment on my posts? How come? Would you be interested to know that the very person ( Shannon ) who came to ur defense and posted the bible insert was one of the people that clicked ' funny ' under my " You didn't just throw religion into the mix did you? " comment! She thought it was funny and that's how it was intended! I think you need to chill out and have a sense of humor! You're right! Some of the women are being kinda harsh but YOU put urself out there and opened the door for them to ' have an opinion ' or ' criticize ' you! You can't turn around and accuse them of being mean or rude because that's exactly how you come off in ur first post! They're just returning the favor!



Just for the record, it sounds to me like you NEED someone to talk to?!! You don't wanna complain to ur mom? I don't consider it complaining......talking to a close friend or ur mom for support and affection while ur husband is away for long periods of time doesn't make you weak or a whiner!! It makes you human.....it seems to me like ur living in this perfect bubble PRETENDING everything is ok? Having a good marriage is one thing BUT are you happy? Really happy? Ur husband is away for work? Ur always worried about him and rightfully so! Ur family is 7 hours away......who do you confide in? Who do you laugh with? Just because you haven't had a ' breakdown ' doesn't mean ur ok!? I feel badly for you! I'm in the same boat! I have an 18 month old daughter and we haven't seen her dad since Christmas for a week! And before that it was Sept. from the previous year! It's hard and admitting you need to talk to someone isn't a sign of weakness!



Maybe you don't mind waiting on ur husband and having that type of ' subservient ' relationship because ur husband isn't around all that much......your moments together are precious?!! I dote on my hubby when he's home too but trust me if he was around more, I'd expect more!



Anyhow, if you ever need to chat?! I'm always around! I wish you the best of luck!

Nikki - posted on 03/29/2010

LMAO, Sorry it may be inappropriate but I find this really funny and so so so so old fashioned! Talk about submissive! I grew up in the 80's and 90's not the 50's, that's very nice that is how your marriage works but mine is so very different.

My husband and I are madly in love we respect that we both have to work hard, and we help each other out. As I sit here right now, I have about 4 loads of washing to do, I didn't unpack the dishwasher today and I didn't even cook dinner, there are toys everywhere, I haven't shaved my legs this week, instead I played with my daughter all day, I made her a weeks worth of baby food and put it in the freezer, I cleaned the bathroom and did the groceries, I had a nap while she was asleep and when my husband came home we all spent time together and had take away food. I may do the washing tomorrow?

But I do know at the end of the day I have spent as much quality time with my daughter as I can, when my husband comes home I spend quality time with him, and he really doesn't give a dam about the washing, he has other needs he would rather be fulfilled (if you know what I mean!)

I don't bad mouth my husband, we have a wonderful life, neither of us have anything to complain about, we love each other and I know that we will be together forever, we just complete each other, but I could understand why some women do, they need to vent and it is their god given right to do so, if they didn't do it here they would have so much more pent up anger!

So maybe you should stop telling people how to live their own lives. I am surprised you allow yourself the time to jump on the net, shouldn't you be ironing your undies?

Elisabeth - posted on 03/29/2010

Thank you to all that have shown support. And thank you to all those that have been polite, even if they did not agree, it is very mature of you to be able to say how you feel and not be overcome with your feelings and/or rude.

Elisabeth - posted on 03/29/2010

Angie Neang

My husband loves to be a father. And it's completely inappropriate that you should say he should of worn a condom, but if you want to dish it out then... your father should of worn a condom, but unfortuantly they probably weren't invented back then. I don't want this to turn into a slagging match between to women so I won't be saying anything more to you even if you choose to continue.

Elisabeth - posted on 03/29/2010

For all those people that think I am doing this just because my husband expects it of me, it's not. I'm doing it because I want to, becuase I love to make my family happy. So no my husband doesn't expect it of me, nobody does. No actually that is wrong, one person does expect it. ME, I do, I expect it of myself that I be a good wife to my husband. I expect it of me to be the best mother to my children that I can be. And Christine Strandberg, you are completly off. I know my husband better then you do, thats why I married him.

Angie - posted on 03/29/2010

wow, you should really take your own advise. You said "if we didn't like being stay at home moms that we shouldn't have kids." Well, IF your husband didn't want to be a father then HE should have worn a condom.

Amy - posted on 03/29/2010

going to work for 8 hours a day is not harder than staying home and running the house. i just see it as my hubby works for 8 hours, i do the housewife thing for 8 hours then after that its up to both of us to do things around the house! its not fair to say hubby can work for hours and then sit back and do nothing all day when being a sahm is a 24 hour job,,

Elisabeth - posted on 03/29/2010

Dear Shannon, Thank you for the post. I believe exactly what you said and think you very couragous for saying it. God bless you. And for everyone you thinks its wrong to "Bring religion into the mix", We're only saying our opinion, we don't pick on you for your beliefs or think they are funny. This is not a high school forum, this is for adults.

Elisabeth - posted on 03/29/2010

Dear Catherine Ross. Thank you for your post. That sounds like a tough situation you have there, I don't mind that you explained it to us. I don't like it when people say, "My husband is so fat and lazy and is so bad in bed, blah blah,.." Haha. But I'm glad you didn't say that. Thank you and hope you get everything you wish.