My daughter father is half white and black and im black would you consider her being mixed?

Darshana - posted on 10/22/2009 ( 61 moms have responded )

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The father of my child has two sons that doesnt have the same hair type as my daughter so basically you would question if they are mix but everyone always wants to ask me what is she mixed with and i pretty much tell them her father is mixed and i kind of look at her as if she isnt mix she just a black baby with beautyful hair am i wrong??

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Jessica - posted on 10/27/2009

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i am mixed, husband is black, and we have 4 children...3 are brown skinned and one is light like me. Skin color has been a subject of many discussions, usually because they wonder why me and my daughter are the same color and not everyone else, or my oldest daughter was even jealous that she didn't have our skin color! In my home, we teach the kids that African Americans come in all different beautiful colors, and also that it was just Gods perfect design that Hannah and I took on more caucasion pigment then the rest....we teach that we are all mixed, and mixed perfectly.

Melissia - posted on 10/25/2009

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My daughter Chenoa's dad is half black and half white and i am white. Chenoa has beautiful caramel colored skin and people always ask me if she is mixed.. I tell them it doesnt matter what color she is she is a angel from god. thats all they need to know.. But i do want Chenoa to be proud of her heritage too. So she knows that she is mixed.. And she is proud of it.. She is a beautiful little lady..

Kristi - posted on 10/25/2009

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This is so true. So many people have so many races in their backgrounds, it's impossible to guess what any given child will come out looking like. Both myself and my husband are African American, and our youngest child was born with blond hair and blue eyes, and I was CONSTANTLY asked if my child's father was white, if my children had the same father - in front of my husband!! People don't realize that these questions are very intrusive, and frankly ridiculous. We're all a lovely mixture.. and that's that.

Roberta - posted on 08/21/2012

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Yes, she is mixed and should be proud of it. Often children of mixed heritage are beautiful babies and probably the majority that are staring is because they see a beautiful baby.Babies have a way of attracting attention, that is all babies do. I think people ask about the mix because they are genuinely interested and trying to learn about the many cultures. The world has become a real melting pot and each race has so much interesting history and customs. There is nothing more interesting than people. If they are bigots or racists they wouldn't be interested in anything other than making racial and rude comments. When people ask, proudly tell them her mix and accept their question as a compliment. It is rare to find anyone that is only one nationality. Take care and God Bless.

Annette - posted on 10/26/2009

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We are moslty all mixed.If I were asked that question, my response wold be yes she is mixed she is half me and half her daddy.and if pressed for an answer tell the ignmoramus that asked that no she is not mixed she is human

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Roberta - posted on 08/21/2012

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This comment is in reply to Melissa, Actually people do ask what nationality white children are. I had two dark haired children, one red and one blonde child and I was asked that question many times throughout the years. I didn't find the question offensive at all, I was proud to tell them our combined heritage. I agree with Darshana we should love and respect all cultures and we should all be proud of who we are. Don't assume that people are not genuinely interested in you and your family. When we truly know others we will then be capable of having world peace. Love and peace to all.

Miranda - posted on 08/21/2012

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I'm half Mexican and Black, my Fiancé is black. We have our first baby on the way and during the conversation of "who the baby would look like", we talked about the race. I've always thought the baby would be mixed regardless because I'm mixed. I feel if one parent is mixed or if both parents are two different races their mixed. That was my thought, without voicing it. But during that conversation he himself said our baby would be mixed. So in my opinion your daughter is mixed. :)

Christa - posted on 10/27/2009

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People actually ask you that? I think I would tell them...who cares! Or yes she is mixed....she is 1/2 her father and 1/2 her mother!!

Krista - posted on 10/27/2009

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Quoting Darshana:



Quoting Krista:

Who cares what mixture of color percentages she has, she's 100% human. We are all mixtures of varying percentages of the same colors all being brown with the exception of albinos. We're all "mixed" but we're all 100% human. Such a frustrating thing.....get with the program, stop feeding racism.





ARE YOU SAYING THIS TO ME OR OTHER PEOPLE???BECAUSE  WHO THE HELL IS FEEDING RACISM LADY??If this is directed towards me im in no way feeding racisim if that was the case im black i would of totally dated a straight black guy if color was the issue .i love every dfferent race and i think mix kids are beautyful in every way and i do agree we are 100% human but you are totally wrong about me feeding racism ....and thats frustrating . you didnt even have to comment on this subject if you didnt understand but its funny everyone else got it .Sorry you didnt .






My point is that racism focuses on skin color, and there is no such thing as "races" except for animal, plant and human. Human can't mix with animal or plant and so on. Humans only make humans and therefore none of us is mixed. Racism is the ignorance that assumes that someone is inherantly different because their skin is a different color. People who care what color somone is are ignorant.

Nicole - posted on 10/27/2009

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Technically she is mixed but that isn't a bad thing. If anyone asks and you don't want to give details just say she gets her beautiful hair from her daddy and leave it at that.



And just on a side note, as a "white girl" with a Portuguese mom I grew up my whole life with people not realizing she was my mother because I looked like my blonde haired, blue eyed, fair skinned dad. I think it's important to teach children that all colors and races are beautiful and people only look different because they used to live in different places of the world. Kids are smart and not talking about our differences can make them feel negative or ashamed about those parts of themselves. I say embrace your heritage and cultures and enjoy the fact that we are all human when we get down to it.

Darshana - posted on 10/27/2009

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Quoting Jessica:

i am mixed, husband is black, and we have 4 children...3 are brown skinned and one is light like me. Skin color has been a subject of many discussions, usually because they wonder why me and my daughter are the same color and not everyone else, or my oldest daughter was even jealous that she didn't have our skin color! In my home, we teach the kids that African Americans come in all different beautiful colors, and also that it was just Gods perfect design that Hannah and I took on more caucasion pigment then the rest....we teach that we are all mixed, and mixed perfectly.



thanks jessica

Kathy - posted on 10/27/2009

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tell them she is mixed with love. people really need to learn to not open their mouths. it's none of my business what the geneology is in your family. there could be many reasons why her hair is a different type than her brothers. my hubby and I made a fine brown haired girl, a thick dark haired girl and twin red heads who happen to have a little curl. He has almost black hair and I have thin blond hair, so you see there can be many genetics at work.

Darshana - posted on 10/27/2009

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Quoting Lora:

I'm white and my husband is black when people ask me if my babies are mixed I respond with either "no she's all human" or "naw we just tan allot", or occasionally a simple yes with no other explanation. No one questions if 2 white people with brown hair and blue eyes give birth to a blond with brown eyes... so why question my babies.

For my girls I think it's important that I make sure they know all of their heritage.



yeah they really dont.... my daughter is brown skin and curly nice texture hair and its like they are alwayss questioning .but yes its very important for our kids to know there heritage .

Lora - posted on 10/27/2009

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I'm white and my husband is black when people ask me if my babies are mixed I respond with either "no she's all human" or "naw we just tan allot", or occasionally a simple yes with no other explanation. No one questions if 2 white people with brown hair and blue eyes give birth to a blond with brown eyes... so why question my babies.

For my girls I think it's important that I make sure they know all of their heritage.

Darshana - posted on 10/27/2009

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Quoting Krista:

Who cares what mixture of color percentages she has, she's 100% human. We are all mixtures of varying percentages of the same colors all being brown with the exception of albinos. We're all "mixed" but we're all 100% human. Such a frustrating thing.....get with the program, stop feeding racism.


ARE YOU SAYING THIS TO ME OR OTHER PEOPLE???BECAUSE  WHO THE HELL IS FEEDING RACISM LADY??If this is directed towards me im in no way feeding racisim if that was the case im black i would of totally dated a straight black guy if color was the issue .i love every dfferent race and i think mix kids are beautyful in every way and i do agree we are 100% human but you are totally wrong about me feeding racism ....and thats frustrating . you didnt even have to comment on this subject if you didnt understand but its funny everyone else got it .Sorry you didnt .

Krista - posted on 10/26/2009

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Who cares what mixture of color percentages she has, she's 100% human. We are all mixtures of varying percentages of the same colors all being brown with the exception of albinos. We're all "mixed" but we're all 100% human. Such a frustrating thing.....get with the program, stop feeding racism.

Kelly - posted on 10/26/2009

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This is such a touchy subject and I am glad you asked the question. It is extremely hard for me as a white woman to help my son because I can not relate to being black. So I am thankful for the dialog and think it is great that you can ask the questions! So THANK YOU for making people think!!! Thank you for touching on a subject that will make me strive to show my children the right path and treat everyone with love!

Darshana - posted on 10/26/2009

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Quoting Kelly:

Well I understand that! My children and I get it all the time. They get really mad when someone says they are not brothers or that I am not their mom. However, excluding that she is white and telling people she is just black may be perpetuating the very thing you are trying to stop from happening. You are only recognizing that she is black when in FACT (and that is what we are dealing with) she is white. I feel you and have love for you! But we as parents of mixed children need to teach our children that we can embrace every culture of our mixed being! We are all the HUMAN RACE! Good luck and please keep in touch!!!



Actually kelly i have no problem at all stateing the fact that she also has WHITE in her .maybe i didnt come off to clear but what i am saying is i am black and she looks more black and instead of me just coming out and saying "yea she is mixed " i say the fIrst thing that comes to mind and its black(I guess bec i am) because no one really question if she has white they clearly see that im black and they think her father is hispanic lol .I never have a problem with saying she has white in her at all .Thanks for the advice .

Kelly - posted on 10/26/2009

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Well I understand that! My children and I get it all the time. They get really mad when someone says they are not brothers or that I am not their mom. However, excluding that she is white and telling people she is just black may be perpetuating the very thing you are trying to stop from happening. You are only recognizing that she is black when in FACT (and that is what we are dealing with) she is white. I feel you and have love for you! But we as parents of mixed children need to teach our children that we can embrace every culture of our mixed being! We are all the HUMAN RACE! Good luck and please keep in touch!!!

Annette - posted on 10/26/2009

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Quoting Darshana:

My daughter father is half white and black and im black would you consider her being mixed?

The father of my child has two sons that doesnt have the same hair type as my daughter so basically you would question if they are mix but everyone always wants to ask me what is she mixed with and i pretty much tell them her father is mixed and i kind of look at her as if she isnt mix she just a black baby with beautyful hair am i wrong??


 

Darshana - posted on 10/26/2009

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Quoting Kelly:

You think you get people staring at you!?!?!? I am white and I have 3 children that are mixed one Hispanic and Indian , One Japanesse, one Creoloe this French and Black and if I wasted my time worring about what they are and what people ask I waste the valuble time of loving them! She is Mixed. People are curious. we will never change that. It is what you do with the questions or the comments. Like I know she is so beautiful that I can not believe she is my baby... Throw it back out at them, then they realize what they are doing.... Good luck and do not waste your time or hers!



believe me i dont waist my time worring about the comments that are made to me about her, its about when she grow up and how she takes it because thats my baby and whatever bothers her will bother me .so im on here geting advice on how to help her deal with this crazy world because she will stil get stares and she will still get comments made on if she is mix or not.

Jackie - posted on 10/26/2009

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WHen asked , you reply she is mixed with love by my husband and myself and a more beautiful child I cant imagine , I thank God everyday for her . .........jackie xx

Melissa - posted on 10/26/2009

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isn't it interesting that people don't ask what nationalities white babies are mixed with... cos i couldn't answer that question... a bit of this and a bit of that in my blood and a bit of something else in my husbands!!! ALL babies are beautiful... and a mix of their mums and dads... thts all that should matter!!! : )

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I consider her a child that is very much loved. I don't like people who like at people for the color of their skin. God made us all the same and we should love each other as he loves us.

Kelly - posted on 10/25/2009

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You think you get people staring at you!?!?!? I am white and I have 3 children that are mixed one Hispanic and Indian , One Japanesse, one Creoloe this French and Black and if I wasted my time worring about what they are and what people ask I waste the valuble time of loving them! She is Mixed. People are curious. we will never change that. It is what you do with the questions or the comments. Like I know she is so beautiful that I can not believe she is my baby... Throw it back out at them, then they realize what they are doing.... Good luck and do not waste your time or hers!

Jennifer - posted on 10/24/2009

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Although I think that some of the questions that people ask anymore are way too invasive, I'm sure that you and your husband are both very proud of your heritage. I was pregnant with twins and people used to ask me all the time if I went through fertility treatments or if twins run in my family. It bothered me at first because it is none of their business, but after a while I realized that a lot of people were asking because they had either gone through fertility, or knew someone who did and just wanted to "connect". Try not to take offense to their questions. When people ask, it is probably just meant as innocent small talk. If you prefer not to go into your personal history, just say that she is mixed with love. :)

Arwen - posted on 10/24/2009

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I think were all all mixed to some degree, and I would consider your children mixed, but I want to say that the US considers 8% - 12%+ to be African American. When your children take standardized tests, and it comes to the race part at the top, they should mark African American.

Side note: black and white mixed babies are so pretty! I think in all my life, every time I took care of mixed children in preschools, day cares, or just babysitting, they were always the most beautiful children in the classroom. =)

Gloria - posted on 10/24/2009

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were all mixed lol. but i no what u mean. my oldest daughters dad is half mexican and half white.im just white lol.but i have 2 other girls that r just white. my oldest looks nothing like them even though shes only a 1/4 mexican.she looks so much like her dad.people dont think shes mine or that my other 2 girls r her sisters.shes beatiful and i love her.:)

Stacey - posted on 10/24/2009

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she has both african and caucasian genes,so she is mixed technically, it's good to embrace all of our heritage and be proud of who we are :)

Roberta - posted on 10/24/2009

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Sometimes people ask because they are genuinely interested. Many times I have heard people say mixed blood children are so beautiful. I think people today are less racist and are more interested in peoples cultures and history. Racism comes from ignorance and the more knowledge we have the more accepting of one another we should become. Unfortuneately some people just ask and say things to be ignorant and there will always be some of "them" around. Raise your child to be proud of all of her heritages, she has that right. And if you tell someone your childs mix tell them with pride.

Leasa - posted on 10/24/2009

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Well obviously she is mixed , but i don't see why that should matter to anyone . She is a person just like anyone else.I 'm so sick of labels . We should all have one label ! American
Nothing else matters.On my mother's side my grandfather is full Lebonese , my grandmother is German and Irish. On my dads side is Irish , Welch , Scottish and Dutch . I look like i'm Lebonese and i have a lot of people tell me that , but i just say i am an American with a cultural background. I do like the comment about 50% mommy and 50% daddy , that is very cute !

Laurie - posted on 10/24/2009

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Hi there! You know, I hate these questions.... People are nosy, rude and just plain ignorant because we're different. I'm sure my son who is only 19 months will have the same questions asked of him. My husband is Caucasian and I'm Filipino and we have a beautiful son! I think if someone asks again, "What is she mixed with?", I think I'd say, 50% of me and 50% of Daddy! LOL

Sharon - posted on 10/24/2009

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Umm Why does it always come down to color? We have White slave master, Black Asian & Indian. This is from Mom side of family. I remember Mom telling me a story about how my Dad family only met my Dark toned Mom. I was born yellow with Asian eyes & everyone assumed my Mom cheated. I started turning cinnamon about 3yrs. old. Later Dad's family met Mom's rainbow, but the damage was done. Mom never got over it. Words hurt. Mom has 3 young ladies all diff shades, eyes & hair text just beautiful. None of us got Mom's jet black hair. LOL Mom's siblings had at least 3-5 kids. So reunions are very rainbow. LOL! All shades, colors of eyes, colors of hair & hair textures. You name it, we have it. It's just God's lovely work all together. Yet we look alike. We would sit & laugh how some members look like they belong to other part of family because of it. Genes are like that. You may hide who you are but it always come out in the end. Just love her & prepare her for later in life. Even though it's rude, they still ask anyway. LOL!!!

Kimberly - posted on 10/23/2009

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no you shouldnt even havr to answer that my kids are indian & white but its not a big deal i might get offened if someone brought it up cause it isnt a big deal and you are NOT wrong!

Carolee - posted on 10/23/2009

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When people ask me what my son is "mixed with", I tell them the truth... Netherlands Dutch, English, Scottish, German, Native American, French, Aztec, and Mexican! They don't ever ask again!

Kelly - posted on 10/23/2009

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Similar questions have been on here before. I am just appalled that people have the nerve to ask such a thing! I mean, why does it possibly matter to anyone? Someone once said the answer they use to the question "what is she mixed with?" is "love". I like that alot. I guess in answer to your original question, she is mixed. But so what? We have a little girl at our church who is obviously mixed. Her mother is real young (white) and her father is much older (white). I have no idea if she was adopted or if she came from an earlier relationship. I can't imagine thinking that it matters. She is just a beautiful little girl, and her parents love her, and I hate to think that she will have to face rude questions her whole life, but from what I've read on here, I guess it is common. Good luck to you-she is your daughter and absolutely nothing else matters!

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I am half black half white and my hubby is white. We consider our baby mixed. I always hated that question growing up. Usually when someone asks me if I am mixed I just respond, "Yep," and let them deal with trying to figure out with what. If they are going to treat me different based on my response I'd rather not know.

Jackie - posted on 10/23/2009

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The only answer to "Is she mixed?" is "No she is *Insert her name here*!". Its rude and racists to ask. Her heritage is not that important and shouldn't be. Yes she should know her heritage but it doesn't effect who she is or what she will become. The only way to teach people to be colour blind is to be it yourself. So don't answer them... answer them with her name or that she is human. They will quickly realize that they are being rude. No one asks me if my kids are mixed... why because they look white. Guess what they are great canadian mutts, british, french canadian, native indian, and irish/newfie. But still I am never asked... and I think that really does speak volumes.

Dianne - posted on 10/23/2009

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I am mixed, my mum is british and white and my father is african and black, we grew up in many different coutries but are always asked the same question, what are and where are you from, very tiring and tedious to answer. In Africa i was called white girl in the UK i was considered black, in America it is automatically assumed i am hispanic - but never have i seen where people are so pre occupied with colour and race like here. In the uk we have a box for mixed race, in africa there is no box (lol) in the US i tick both black and white, when i had my son the lady in the hospital asked me if i would be offended to list my son as black, i said no as he is clearly not white, I guess he will grow up and be called a light skinned black man like his cousins in florida. Sigh I wonder when we will just be human beings - and ticking those boxes will always make it an issue. You have a beautiful child, just teach her to be confident no matter what people call her or think of her, this is what sustained me through out my youth. Best of luck

Ashley - posted on 10/22/2009

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I think that the whole mixed race thing is overly complicated for no reason... and im not sure why it is so important still. My son is mixed, his father is black and I am white (italian) but his daddy is very "light skinned" and every one tells me that my son is white even though he is mixed and looks 100% like his daddy. I am sure when he gets more hair on his head there will be even more questions about "what is he?" and I am not sure how I am gonna handle it. It also doesn't help that im in the south.

Stephanie - posted on 10/22/2009

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My husband is Hispanic and African-American. I am white. My children have blonde hair and blue eyes. I get asked all the time if our children belong to my husband or if they are from a previous marriage. It does bother me but I am trying to get past that. People are ignorant about blood lines. It doesn't matter what the parents "look" like. Genes can pop up from any generation. For example my husband and I both have brown eyes. My sister and her husband have brown eyes. My 2 children are blue eyed and my sisters son is blue eyed. The only person in our family with blue eyes is our mother. I believe for medical reasons they ask on the paperwork at MD offices. Other than that aren't we all just American?? Really wish "We" could get past this barrier!!

Cathy - posted on 10/22/2009

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Your daughter may want to ask you about the similar question when she gets older. You can tell her "You are American!"

Shaina - posted on 10/22/2009

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...I've had 25 years of being obviously mixed, so I've got lots of great one liners...

Shaina - posted on 10/22/2009

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When people ask me what race I am or what race my children are, I just answer, "Human." I've had people say horrible things to me because they assume what race I am and I just point out how stupid they sound. My children are light brown and they like to tell people that.

Ashley - posted on 10/22/2009

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Quoting Elmary:



Quoting Ashley:

I would consider her as 3/4 black. But it really is no one's business. I really don't like how people just say things, like with my son, both my husband and I are white, and I have Italian so some members of my family are a little darker. Well I guess my son is a little darker than me, so some lady was all like, "wow, your son is darker than you"...and she was looking at my husband like I cheated on him or something. I promptly told her my family has Italian and Native American in it. My brother is a lot darker; he looks like he tans everyday! People can be so rude.
Or like with my cousin. She is half black, half white. She has the most beautiful skin and face. Well, for some reason, some parts of her skin seem to clash , so she has two different colors on her arms and shoulders, it looks like white and mocha. So someone asked what is wrong with her! How rude!





I wonder if this might be a skin disease.  all of my brothers and sisters are half black and white and we are all in the tan skin color range with no difference in the skin pigmentation at all.  I also know that there is this skin disease where it effects the pigmentation of the skin and you will see areas on the body that are brown and white and not an even skin color.





She was seen by a pediatric dermatologist who said she is fine.  It seems to have lessened if that is possible.  A friend of mine is half hispanic half white and also has that on her arm.  I don't see it very often, but it doesn't seem to bother either one of them.  I guess going to school might be annoying since kids are mean, but I don't think it is anything to be worried about.



Yeah we are all mixed!  All of us are perfect mixtures of our parents!  I have: Italian, German, Irish, Scottish, Native American, French Canadian...and I think that's it...but who knows!  :)  I just wish I had the skin my brother has...he really picked up the Italian and Native American...while I am so white I am almost transparent!  :)

Elmary - posted on 10/22/2009

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I would not worry. There will always be people jealous, richer, poorer, shorter, taller just as long as she is taught that it doesn't matter the color of your skin and that it is the inside that counts. But if she sees that you let it bother you then it will bother her as well.

Darshana - posted on 10/22/2009

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Quoting bernadette:

you have to look atit like God would for he does not see color for we all r mix with something it doesnt matter bout if she mix for i have a grand baby that is mix and she looks like she is white true story i took her to the school with me had a meeting after the meeting my son teacher carry my grandbaby to the car and while we were walking a lady made a comment to the teacher aww i see u went and had one so i look at her and say poliltely no this is my grandbaby should have seen the look on her face so just look at ur daughter as being a beautiful human being



yeah you have some very rude people out there and thats what scares me about my daugther , as she get older how will she deal with it , is going to be a lot of jealous people and i get grown ass people that are jealous of her now , family members, outsiders , its crazy!

Elmary - posted on 10/22/2009

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Quoting Ashley:

I would consider her as 3/4 black. But it really is no one's business. I really don't like how people just say things, like with my son, both my husband and I are white, and I have Italian so some members of my family are a little darker. Well I guess my son is a little darker than me, so some lady was all like, "wow, your son is darker than you"...and she was looking at my husband like I cheated on him or something. I promptly told her my family has Italian and Native American in it. My brother is a lot darker; he looks like he tans everyday! People can be so rude.
Or like with my cousin. She is half black, half white. She has the most beautiful skin and face. Well, for some reason, some parts of her skin seem to clash , so she has two different colors on her arms and shoulders, it looks like white and mocha. So someone asked what is wrong with her! How rude!


I wonder if this might be a skin disease.  all of my brothers and sisters are half black and white and we are all in the tan skin color range with no difference in the skin pigmentation at all.  I also know that there is this skin disease where it effects the pigmentation of the skin and you will see areas on the body that are brown and white and not an even skin color.

Darshana - posted on 10/22/2009

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Your right it doesnt matter thats what i wish most people could understand , my question was should i consider her being mix bec like i said before shes my baby i see no color so i guess thats my answer and thats what i will now use "she is beautyful ' Thanks audrey

Ashley - posted on 10/22/2009

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I would consider her as 3/4 black. But it really is no one's business. I really don't like how people just say things, like with my son, both my husband and I are white, and I have Italian so some members of my family are a little darker. Well I guess my son is a little darker than me, so some lady was all like, "wow, your son is darker than you"...and she was looking at my husband like I cheated on him or something. I promptly told her my family has Italian and Native American in it. My brother is a lot darker; he looks like he tans everyday! People can be so rude.

Or like with my cousin. She is half black, half white. She has the most beautiful skin and face. Well, for some reason, some parts of her skin seem to clash , so she has two different colors on her arms and shoulders, it looks like white and mocha. So someone asked what is wrong with her! How rude!

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