my fiancee said he can't get married to me if i can't take care of his daughter from his previous marriage, i told him that his daughter should stay with the mom but he refused ,what do i do

Lizzy - posted on 06/10/2017 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I'm Lizzy 26 years old in a serious relationship but confused

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Dove - posted on 06/10/2017

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Grow up. If you can not accept that this man has a child that he has every right in the world to see as much as possible and that you WILL be her stepmother and will be loving and interacting w/ her as well as you would your own child when she is around... You have no business trying to be w/ a man who has kids and I would hope he would kick your butt to the curb immediately.

Michelle - posted on 06/10/2017

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If you can't accept that he has a child and wants that child to be in his life then you leave!!! How dare you say that the child should stay with the Mother, they come as a package.

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Nettie - posted on 06/20/2017

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Hey Lizzy,

How old is his daughter? What type of relationship do you and his daughter have? Is something wrong with the mother or is the daughter in fully custody with the father?
What is your problem with assisting your future husband with taking care of his daughter?

My confusion is do you think that is not part of your wifey duties? If you are planning to create and live the remaining of your life with this man than it is your duty to create a loving environment for his child from a previous relationship.

Unfortunately, just because she is a daughter and has another mother doesn't mean that living with her mom is the best thing for her. Is there an underlying reason why he doesn't want her living with the mom full time. Could it be that he is a better provider? Does the mother see the daughter anytime.

You are asking about a touchy subject, which is probably why you have been bombarded with the responses you have to take care of the daughter because it's a package deal but you have left out a lot of background information to help better answer your question and/or try to understand why you are against the daughter living with her father.

I am open to chatting with you about this if you would like to respond to my reply..
Have a good day.

Sarah - posted on 06/13/2017

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Even if he agreed that the child were to stay with mom, what would happen if she died or became disabled? He is her FATHER, that never changes.

Takala - posted on 06/10/2017

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Honestly, If you truly love him then you should except the child. Even if the child were to stay with the mom then he will still be able to see them. I think you should except the child and give them the love and care from a stepmom the best you can because, that's what they need.I understand that it may be hard to take care of a child that is not yours but, you will need to treat that child like they are your's.

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