My Son Hardly Sleeps

Renae - posted on 10/27/2010

In regards to Beth's post about Babywise...

There are a few books with feeding and sleeping techniques that the Paediatric associations of most countries recommend we do not follow. This is because these books are based on the opinions of the author alone, not on actual research. The other reason is because the books go against the current health department recommendations (which we must remember change about every 5 years). As such they recommend we ignore books that do not recognise normal sleeping patterns according to current research or that do not recognise the need for feeding and sleeping on the baby's cues. This doesn't mean that the methods in these books dont work, it just means that in the opinion of the professionals and researchers there are better ways.

Always take baby books at face value, remember that it is usually one person's opinion, and only do what feels right and makes sense to you. Some baby books are great, some deverse to be burnt!

Beth - posted on 10/23/2010

I have heard that BabyWise is a dangerous method to use with your child. I will admit, I have not looked into it, but if I am correct, I believe that it entails feeding and sleeping on the parents schedule only, and not really responding to the child's cues. I have heard that there are many children who developed eating and sleeping issues later in life because of this, some diagnosed with failure to thrive. Again, this is just what I have heard, but I would be remiss if I didn't mention it, as someone else posted recommending the method.

Grace - posted on 10/23/2010

Sounds like my bub. He just turned 5 months old and IS still taking only power naps, anything from 15, 20, 30, 40 mins. I don't know why. But he's very lucid after a power nap so I let him play after that, on the play gym or swing or with his 3 year-old sister. By 7pm onwards he gets super cranky so I wait as long as I can, about 7.30pm or 8pm, give him his ritual nightly warm bath and put him to bed. He then sleeps about 4-5 hours, I breastfeed him, then he goes for another 4-5 hour stretch. By morning, he wakes and I feed him, and its every 2-3 hours. BTW, I swaddled him from birth but now that he's rolling over, I don't want to swaddle him because it's dangerous, although he sleeps a longer nap when swaddled. That's not the solution though, so I am waiting for his power nap phase to end. Who knows if it will. His sister napped properly though....and I use the same routines and tricks. All babies are different!

Betty - posted on 10/23/2010

My now 6 yr old daughter was a terrible sleeper too. Finally when she was 6 months old I couldn't take the no sleep thing anymore so I put her in bed with me, something I swore that I would never do. She then slept GREAT! I know a lot of people don't like to get them in that habit but I was desperate and for me it was worth it!

Coleen - posted on 10/21/2010

My first son did not sleep through the night until he was 3 years old, he would wake every 2-3 hours. Not a good napper either. He did have some health issues like food allergies, ear infections... that we found and gerd, acid reflux, that would bother him when he was sleeping, he slept alot in his infant seat for this reason when he was small.

I listened to tapes about sleep, I think Ferber was the author, and they were helpful but while I tried to make him cry it out, when he was 2, because everyone told me this was what I had to do because he was too spoiled because I breastfed, he ended up falling out of his crib and 2 weeks later we found an ulcer in his stomach. Poor thing, no wonder he wouldnt sleep and everyone was blaming me for spoiling him. I will never again not trust myself and my instincts.

Maybe health issues are not the reason for you childs lack of sleep but there are other alternatives. The books on tape by Ferber did suggest that kids that are overtired do not sleep as well, also sharing a bed with your child may help, check into natural parenting methods, this does give the child a sense of security that helps. Routines with a warm lavender bath help. Also consider not having to go back to work because right now it seems that you are needed more at home. Is it possible to get a relative or a neighbor, or a mothers helper type sitter to come over so you can sleep a while during the day. If you sleep when you put you child down and possibly can sleep a little longer because someone else is there to respond to the child when he wakes than you will be less tired and stressed and able to cope with the night-time. Maybe dad could give you a couple of hours after dinner.

I also did some of my grocery shopping with my son, love 24hr stores, after 10:00 pm. The streets, stores and parking is less crowded and instead of sitting at home being resentful that I wasnt sleeping, I would get done things that I was too tired to deal with during the daytime.

Time flies by so fast and my now 13yo sleeps just fine, sleeps very soundly, I am not quite sure when that all started but I am certainly glad it did. I lived through it even with another son coming along when he was only 2. Granted I did not have another job, that was my job and I was very devoted to being available to meet all of my childrens needs.

I understand how you feel in your sleepless state, hang in there, try different things but do not blame yourself. By just accepting your situation and not forcing things to change you will be more relaxed and less stressed and this will help alot.

April - posted on 10/21/2010

I have the same problem with my 4yr. old son. He's barely slept since he was 2 months old. The only time he would get a 2 - 3 hour nap is if he was sleeping on me in my arms when he was a baby and he'd wake up every 1 to 2 hours around the clock. I barely got any sleep. tis went on till he tunred 2yrs. old. he doesn't takes anymore and I had learned that if he went to sleep between 10pm and 12am he would get at least 4 hrs. of sleep most nights, less on other nights. and some nights he would not go to sleep till the next morning at 8am. Then my sister in law told us to try this stuff called melatonin. it's supposed help you sleep. you can find it at any vitamin store. you can even ask your dr. at it. we give him half of a 3mg lozenge. we also had him take a sleep study test and found out he has a little bit of sleep apnea. he sleeping patterns have gotten somewhat better where he has less wakefull nights. even though I recently had an almost 24hr. nighter with him where he woke up at 2am and stayed up till a little after midnight the next day.
research the melatonin to see if it's for you and ask your Dr. about having a sleep study test done
wish you all the luck and hope you can get some needed sleep soon.

Tasnim - posted on 10/21/2010

http://www.babycenter.com/baby-sleep-pro...

Tasnim - posted on 10/21/2010

Stick with a rotuineStick with a routine before putting him to sleep, like feeding him, give him a bath then massage him with a lavender lotion that will relax him, read him a book or you tell him a story, the most important thing is to make sure the lights are off, not even a small light in his bedroom, that will teach him when it’s dark it’s time to sleep, and when the sun rise it’s time to wake up.

Tasnim - posted on 10/21/2010

Maybe this website can help you :)
http://blogs.babycenter.com/mom_stories/...

Carrie - posted on 10/20/2010

I have three children that are now 7,6, and 3. All three of my children slept through the night between 6-8 weeks. Okay, I'm not special. However, I read a book when I was pregnant with my first and never deviated from it. "Baby Wise" by Dr. Gary Ezzo. When I tell you, by 12 weeks I was laying my children in their crib and they would stir for about 5 min and go right to sleep. Each one of them. This is not an easy process the book outlines, but PLEASE TRUST ME when I tell you it works. My girlfriend who has 5 boys used it for all 5 of her children and it worked. Our kids our healthy and fine. Makes it alot easier for babysitters, spouse, etc.. when they can just lay your child down. Let me know what you think.

Jenn - posted on 10/20/2010

You do realize that you're feeding your baby alcohol by giving them vanilla extract, right? No wonder they slept!

Jessica - posted on 10/20/2010

Sorry missed the part about the teething before. Try some vanila extract in his sippie. It should help him sleep through the worst of the teething and its safer the using medication. It worked wonders for my guys. WARNING though the more you use it the less it will affect the little one.

Jessica - posted on 10/20/2010

My guy doesnt sleep either and hes 14 months. he use to wake up four or more times a night. Doc said to feed him before I put him to bed. It didnt stop the waking up but it did help alot. now he only wakes up once or twice. I give him a sippie of milk and he goes right back to sleep. Hope this helps you some.

Jessica - posted on 10/19/2010

Warm bath, bottle, teething tablets and bed time. I don't know... my baby gal takes several cat naps. I am lucky if she takes a full hour at once. It is quite frustrating. But, she does sleep between 8 and 10 hours at night, with the occasional wake up.

Renae - posted on 10/19/2010

Ah ha I found this conversation again! I tired to reply to you a few days ago and my internet dropped out!!

Firstly, most 4 month olds do not take 2-3 hour naps. There is a lot of outdated information out there based on what you can force a baby to do using severe cry it out methods, this does not mean that most babies do it without exposure to such methods.

Between 4 and 7 months, 50% of babies cat-nap for 30 to 40 minutes at a time. It usually ends when they start crawling and is a developmental phase. During this time they should be put to bed frequently to avoid becoming overtired. Overtiredness is the natural emeny of sleep! Once a baby is overtired they have trouble going to sleep and difficulty moving between the stages of sleep so they wake up and cry much more frequently during the night. During the day they need to nap after 45 minutes to max 1 hour of being awake (yes it makes getting out and doing things very difficult, but remember this only lasts a few months).

Your baby is most definately overtired and your first step is to get him sleeping more during the day, and see how that changes him at night. He also may not be feeding well during the day. Tired babies have difficulty identifying when they are hungry and knowing how much they need to take.

Also, most 4 month olds sleep a solid 4-5 hours at night, but 25% of them still wake every 3 hours.

Annie - posted on 10/18/2010

I hate to tell you this, but some babies are just not good sleepers. My son was the same way. At five months he would sleep for 5 hours at a time and that was the most sleep I have gotten this hole first year. He still gets up at night and he just turned one. He is a very light sleeper! Co-sleeping works for some families, but if he is not a heavy sleeper you will wake him up.
Try a white noise machine. It helps to muffle the noise in the rest of the house. You might try keeping him up longer between naps so that hopefully he will sleep longer.
I once had a nurse tell me that he was not lacking nutrition, so I should let him cry it out. This way he could learn to put himself back to sleep. It's easier to do it now than when they are one and know that mommy is not around. Also some say that if he isn't getting enough to eat during the day he will wake up more at night.
If you are like me, you have heard and tried all of this! I have just learned to except that my son is not a good sleeper!
Oh you might try a nightly routine. I have to make sure that my son doesn't take a nap after 5 pm or he is up a lot later! Also if he gets over tired he will not sleep well either. You have to work out a schedule that works for you all!

Erin - posted on 10/18/2010

My son stayed swaddled till he was about 6 months. (life saver!) I also agree that having a night time routine helps a lot. We feed him dinner between 6 and 630 then bath time between 7 and 730 and hes off the sleep with his puppy and music playing no later then 800. Granted we got this set up when he was little bitty. (hes almost 2 now) And we have not had a problem with night time yet. Though he will have night terrors now and again.

Monica - posted on 10/18/2010

My son is 2 years old and has recently started seeing a Neurologist. I give my son Melatonin (found at a health food store) at night to help him sleep which now is from 8:30 pm - 7 am (hooray!!) and I give him a high dose of B6 vitamin during the day. Ladies, this is working! My sons development is picking up speed and he is not as hyper/wired. I feel like it has been so much easier to bond with him. Definetly ask your Pediatrician about these 2 items before you try. My son will also be visiting a Developmental Pediatirican. Hope this helps.

Katie - posted on 10/18/2010

My boy is 8 months and has never slept for long periods during the day. He sleeps on average for 30 mins a time and has 2-3 naps. He has slept well at night going 7.30-7am. Its possible your baby has day night confusion perhaps. Doesn't know the difference between day and night. Make sure you have a clear bedtime routine at night which differs from day time naps. When he wakes at night make sure you don't speak to him and keep the lights low and don't interact with him. If its feeding he wants then feed him quietly and put hhim back to bed. In theory he should be going 4 hours between feeds at night? Are you breastfeeding? Is it possible that your not producing enough milk and he doesn't sleep? Perhaps at night time you could give a bottle which should make him go longer and then you know that he is not waking because he is hungry its for another reason. Is he cold? Do you use a sleeping bag? I hope this helps

Heidi - posted on 10/16/2010

my boy is 15 month he still get up to breast feed at least 1 to3 times a night. i been tying to get him to sleep at night

Leslie - posted on 10/16/2010

I think my daughter and your son should get together and have 3 am crib parties! We call her the incredible non sleeping baby. We tried crying it out from the time she was 5 months to about 9 months and she would cry in the crib for up to 3 hours.....and still not fall asleep. When we finally got her out of the crib.....she would merrily crawl away. no fussing, no crankiness later. we couldn't believe how happy she was on less than 8 hour sleep PER DAY. So I stopped the CIO method....it just doesn't work with her. And I couldn't listen to the crying anymore. Some days I would sit on the front porch, with her wailing on the monitor in the background, and I would just shake. She is 11 months now and I has started to take a morning and afternoon nap most days, but she still is up several times a night and it takes a couple of hours to get her back to sleep. We do the same bedtime routine with her as the older 2......bath, warm milk, story, sing a few songs together, hugs and kisses.....bed. But we have to hold her until she falls asleep. She shares a bedroom with her 3 year old sister and I just cannot leave her in there screaming and crying. I definitely feel your pain.......I don't know how long we can keep this up.

Eryn - posted on 10/15/2010

They make swaddle blankets for when you child gets bigger. Swaddling works as well as co sleeping. I am not a fan of co sleeping however on the night that I am overly exhausted I will put my son in the bed with me and he sleeps much better.

Our schedule is bath around 8:30...warm milk at 9 and hopefully lala land at 9:30. He wakes up around 4am and I fed him and lay him right back down and we are up and ready for the next morning at 9 am. He cat naps during the day...usually 3-4 (30 min) naps.

Good Luck!!!!

Debra - posted on 10/15/2010

Thank you. I swaddled him when he was a NB & he's outgrown his swaddler blanket but I didn't even think of that. He loved it. I'll try that too. Thanks!

Chantal - posted on 10/15/2010

Have you tried swaddling him? My son was very active and would wake himself up with his hands. I agree with trying to put him to bed earlier and try a bedtime routine. About an hour before bed dim the lights avoid any excessive stimulation, give him a feed, a warm bath then a book or song and a snuggle then swaddle him. I also think it's normal for them to still awake multiple times for feedings or comfort at that age. Every baby is different so try not to compare.

Jenn - posted on 10/15/2010

Sometimes when babies don't sleep much, it's because they are overly tired and need more sleep. Good sleep begets more good sleep. First of all, it's very normal for them to still be waking up at night at this age, so don't worry too much about that. I would try putting them to bed much earlier than what you are now and see if that doesn't help some.

Candy - posted on 10/14/2010

I am a firm believer in co-sleeping. If that is not a way for you to go. They say feed the child and only wait one hour before bed any longer and they will be up. Try warm milk and mine did well with classical music playing softly all night.