Nervous about having a third child!

Jennifer - posted on 08/18/2010 ( 35 moms have responded )

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I would like to hear some of your stories. Any advice on having a third baby?

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Tina - posted on 08/18/2010

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Speaking from personal experience going from one to two children is much harder than going from two to three kids. I have a 4 1/2 year old a 2 1/2 year old and an 11 month old. Our first two children were planned and worked very hard for and then our third was a complete unplanned blessing. The first couple weeks to month are kinda hard but once you get past that point it is super easy. I love my life as a stay at home mommy to three kids. I can not imagine my life with only the two.

Tracy - posted on 08/22/2010

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Speaking from personal experience I am a mother of 4. I have a 8 years, 7 years (these 2 are 14 months apart) 4 year old and a 6 month old. Going from 1 to 2 children is adjustment, child 3 and 4 is no different then having 2. You will do great! With my 4th I have 3 little helper my 4 year old his job is diaper duty (not changing them thats up to me or my hubby) but he gets new diapers and throws out the old one in garbage makes him feel special! Also the other thing I did when feeding baby I would tell the others to get their fav book and we would sit and read while I was feeding. Good luck, you are going to enjoy having three little people around tons of fun!

Nyssa - posted on 08/22/2010

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With my first three it could get very overwhelming fast. I remember crying alot after I had my 3rd. They are 2 yrs apart. But, after the 4th and especially after the 5th it seemed a heck of a lot easier. Probably because the two oldest are big enough to help out in a bigger way. Organization, if only I could stay organized, is the key either way. I keep telling myself that anyway. It can still get overwhelming, but it's not as bad now. I can count on my 2 oldest to help with the dishes, or laundry, instead of watching it pile up. It helps just to get out of the house, too. Just walking to the park if it's nice enough, or walking laps in the mall. Just as long as the mall doesn't have those stupid riding toys. Ours didn't when I had the smallest, but know I can't avoid them. It's not a good place to take the kids to walk anymore for me. They always want to ride on the blasted things.

Manuela - posted on 08/20/2010

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I am scared to have a third kid to i got 2 boys 4 and almost 6 and it scares me to think of another baby,easpecially another boy.I always think how would i ever go grocery shopping,taking big kids to school have to take a baby also.I guess i am just not ready for another one yet.

Toni - posted on 08/24/2010

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Don't stress you can do it!!

I have 4 children, s boys 1 girl, 8, (almost)5, 3 and almost 1. I am not going to lie you will have your rough moments, they key is a strick rountine. I mean same time for getting up, eating, bath abd bedtime. The boys are not quiet, and she can sleep threw it all, get the baby use to noise.
In my house we I get up at 7 get my self ready for the day, then they get up at 7:30 ish, have breakfast get dressed. 8:30 I take them to school. and so on, bedtime is at 8, then I get a little down time to myself. You need that time.
My husband also goes out of town for work, a week or sometime too. Have family or friends visit you helf out is you need something.
Having a third isn't bad, just takes more scheduling of your time, it will take longer to go place and to make sure you have everything that you need.
We just went on our first vacation with 4 kids and it was alot of fun,

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Tammy - posted on 02/28/2012

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I have three boys 13; 12 and 7. I thought going from 2 to 3 was easy. My baby was pre-mature and sick when he as an infant but I was lucky enough to be a SAHM at that point and I dealt with dr appts and therapist appts all week.



Looking back even though he as not planned and came as a total shock; I could not imagine my life any different now.



Our family is complete and all three of my boys are healthy.



Good luck to you and keep your support system open. You always need help when children are involved.

Amy - posted on 08/24/2010

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I went from one to three.... my oldest was 2 1/2 when the twins were born. The babies seem to just fall into our schedule that already exsisted... You can do it... It will all work out... It a change and something to get use to... give it time and all will be fine... you won't remember what your life was like before three kids in a few months....

Alyssa - posted on 08/24/2010

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I have 3 children and one on the way. Six, Five, Two and due date of Feb 1st. My first two are only 20 months apart. The second and third are 25 months apart. I tried to base my decision as to when to have the next one on my youngest child. For example, how much Mama time does this child still depend on or need. My oldest was very independent. And he was very excited to be a big brother. The second was more dramatic with her emotions (still is) and so when she started to become more independent. Once pregnant, she carried a baby doll around with her and took care of the baby. By the time number 3 came she was ready. I have a great husband, family and friends, so for the first few weeks after number 3 was born, I relied on them quite often to keep my anxiety down. By the time number 3 was two weeks old, I was ready to pick up the routine again. The transition from 1-2 was harder than 2-3. And we shall have to see what 3-4 is like when it come. :)

Susan - posted on 08/24/2010

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hiya im exspecting number 6 my eldest is 16 and just got her exam results today .so shes ok but her mates are bit not sure then my others are 14 and 12 they are both boys and are keen to have a brother .then i have 9 year old and 6 year old .so its going to be weird in day having baby at home after not having a baby or young child at home in day for two years . and not changing nappies for 4 years and if is boy not sure i havent changed boy for 9 years .

Nicole - posted on 08/23/2010

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Wow, I'm reading your guys post and its making me very nervous! I'm going on my 4th. I have a 10 yr. 3 yr and 1 yr. Im verrrry excited but super nervous too

Lisa - posted on 08/23/2010

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i have four, my first two were really close in age, then a space, then my last two. My daughter is 3, and my fourth is 8 months old. My daughter has been a huge help. She wants to be mommy too. We watched home birthing movies together, and read a lot of I'm a big sister, or there's a new baby, etc books. To help her deal. When the baby came she handled it really well. She just loves him to death. No biting, or hurting. She would help rock him get me diapers or wipes, etc. We got her a baby she could nurse, so we'd snuggle and nurse our babies together. Having the third or fourth baby is easier than the second. Your other children are already used to having someone else take your time, so they won't be as jealous (but you do need to hand the baby over to daddy and spend some big kid time with the older children), and the other children can help you. I think my second was the hardest because my first started biting him all the time.
Sending kids off to school with a baby isn't that hard. I would stick the baby inside my coat and stand out with my kids at the bus stop. When baby got older and wanted out of my coat, we used a pram and a sling, and all the bus kids would wave at the cute baby!

Susan - posted on 08/23/2010

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well congratulations when are you due .the 3rd is always harder to adjust but just give yourself time .it depends on the kids ages i had 3 under 3.6 so that was hard as had 2 in nappies . 2 waking in the night . dont try and be super mum just be mum take offers of support make the most of toddler groups .and daycare for rest and you time.

Pip - posted on 08/22/2010

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I've got 6 kids and from my personal experience the hardest was going from 1 child to 2 kids. The easiest for me was the 3rd. Good luck

Candisse - posted on 08/22/2010

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im pregnant with my third i have a two and a half year old and an eight month old the will only be eleven months between this bub and my second (complete accident) i have been having a few stressful moments my eldest is worse than the terrible twos but i keep reminding myself i will only have three kids at home for a year and then my eldest starts school, my second should be nearly walking by the time i have baby number three so my eldest wont just find him a blob any more once he is up and at it also i got the boys alot of christmas presents that involve the both of them to play together and encourage a brotherly bond, it will be hard with three kids under three but i know i can do it and that you can do it because we are woman and we were born to be mothers =) GOODLUCK!

Candace - posted on 08/21/2010

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oh wow...guess it really depends on what you already have and are going to have....in our case, we have 2 boys-Gavin (4 1/2) and Copeland (3 next month) and our third was the 1st girl born in our family *on my husband's side* since 1980-Peytan (8months)....My husband is VERY protective over her cause it's his ONLY baby girl and all...so he stresses me out about her. The boys are really good with her...They play with her like they do each other...give her cars, share toys with her-but not each other, share anything they have to eat after asking me if it's ok, help me give her baths, help get her dressed by bringing me her diapers if she needs one, etc. They treat her like she's a boy sometimes...roll her around with them on the ground and such *that gets under my hubby's skin*, but I think as long as they aren't hurting her and they're having fun, what harm is it to get a little dirty?
When we first brought Peytan home from the hospital, the boys were so great with her....I wouldn't worry too much about having a 3rd...it's not much different from having 2 except you have extra hands:)

Good luck:):)

Vicky - posted on 08/21/2010

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I have 5 and wouldnt have it any other way.. I love them all the older ones always help even though they werent much older , I love how they care for eachother and play and I love thinking that one day when myself or my husband cant be there they have eachother..

Tamara - posted on 08/21/2010

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I have a 7, 5 and 1 year old. Its not much harder than two, other than more money. My middle son was very clingy to me and very much a mommas boy, so I thought that when I had the baby he would be jealous, but he surprised me and loves the baby, he says hes his baby! So sometimes your kids can surprise you!

Christina - posted on 08/21/2010

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I have three girls, 4 1/2, 2, and 11 months. Our third daughter was not planned, and it took me a while to be excited about the pregnancy. The first month or so was difficult, but we all got into a routine pretty quickly. Now, I can't imagine life without Piper, she really does complete our family.

Heather - posted on 08/21/2010

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Ladies, you will do great! I have an almost 10 yr old, a 7 yr old, and a 5 yr old and I am dying for #4! You will have your rough days and you will have your great days,but if you learn to face every day with prayer, a smile. love, and a sense of humor you will do great!

Kathleen - posted on 08/20/2010

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I agree that the first couple of weeks with three under the age of 4 was, to say the least, chaotic. But once I learned to trust that the older two would not hurt the baby things got less chaotic.
I had purchased a wicker baby basket a long time ago for my second baby. I still had it for #'s 3,4,&5. I could put the baby in the basket to nap or just play for the first few months and not have to worry about the older two running him over and I could move the basket with me from room to room. (we used foam padding and fabric to fashion a matress and bumper pads for the basket)
I do try to have someone ride shotgun when I run errands so that I do not have to take them all out at every stop. I can leave the engine running while Dad, Grandma or Auntie sits in the car with the little ones. For longer stops, the extra adult can push kids in buggy while Mom shops with another.
When I have to shop without help, I make it a short trip (one or two stores at the most) and I make a list as I am sure to forget what I was shopping for as I am trying to get everyone to stay in the cart..
But remember that many of the things we find so frustrating at the moment become things we will laugh at later so why not laugh now?

Jamie - posted on 08/20/2010

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Hello I have four children now but my three oldest are all close together. They are now 17yr, 14yr, 12yr and our baby is 2yr. My advice is don't sweat the small things. It was tough when they were little but we all got through it. Try to have your oldest two on a schedule before the baby is born. It helps things run more smoothly. I played with the oldest two when the baby slept and when the oldest two napped I spent time with the baby. Having three little ones you have to have a sense of humor and sometimes juggle things around. I found three children was a lot of fun. Yes there were days the baby was more fussy and needed more time with me and there was sometimes one of the other children needed me and the baby had to wait. The first couple of months was the toughest but after that I forgot what it was like to only have my two children and not the baby. They are now all or almost teenagers and I would love to go back to to those days. They are all great kids now and they have great childhood memories.

Kim - posted on 08/20/2010

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It is so much easier to go from 2-3 than 1-2. You are used to not napping anymore while pregnant or while doing nightly feedings. Usually the older 2 can play together depending on their ages. Mine were almost 7 and 4 when my 3rd was born( I had problems getting and staying pregnant) so they could keep themselves busy, my 7 yr old could get drinks or snacks for the 4 yr old. Luckily my husband took the week off after the baby was born, then it was Christmas vacation so I was all set by the time school started again. I lived an 8 min walk from the bus stop, so getting there would have been tough since especially with a c-sec I wasn't allowed to walk that far or drive yet. And by the 3rd its like old hat, you have been thru it 2 other times, the 3rd is no problem! And my son was the helpful mature type until about 5, luckily my daughter was a great listener and helped out and stayed with me when we went places. You'll do fine :)

Valerie - posted on 08/20/2010

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Thanks for all the comments! I went on this as my hubby and I are discussing the possibility of trying for a third child next year. It's helpful to read about everyone's experiences! Thanks! :)

Donna - posted on 08/20/2010

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My experience is that one to two is fine, two to three is an exponential change
I love Euan to bits, but our lives are almost intolerably busy all the time now. I think aprt of the problem is as a good friend said to me "once you have hit 3 you have run out of hands"
The kids however sem to be thriving on it and they all dote on each other...Ben is 7, Mattie is nearly 3 and Euan is 7 months

Jane - posted on 08/20/2010

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I'm a mother of seven. I can honestly say that one is like having none, two is like having 10. Once they can run more directions than you can chase, it's over anyway.

Seriously, I always anticipated a logistical nightmare when pregnant, and when they made it out - it worked itself out. You do what you have to do, and the kids go with the flow.

Relax and enjoy. :)

Laura - posted on 08/20/2010

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hi i have a 6 year old a 4 year old and a 6 month old. my eldest is fantastic she'll sit for hours playing with the baby. My middle child is not as happy she loves the baby and has never hurt him but throws a lot of tantrums now and will only talk or play with baby if no one watching her. she is getting better now she's use to the baby and knows we still love her and have time for her but she was very difficult in the begining it just takes time and a lot of hard work. giving her little jobs to do and time alone with baby(im spying round a corner lol) has helped a lot and lots cuddles and kisses too just make sure the other children know that u still love them and they should b fine good luck

Beth - posted on 08/20/2010

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I think I had a harder time transitioning to my 2nd child than my third. We lived in the country, didn't have a lot of friends to depend upon, and my marriage was in a much different place. I remember my one of my outtings where I even forgot to put on my shoes and it was still cold outside.

With my 3rd he came December 31 - 2 weeks early - and it was snowy/blustery. I figured my two other boys were so much older that we'd do okay. Fortunately we moved to the burbs and my youngest school child was attending preschool with a neighbor so she took on the task of taking and bringing home. That really helped. I also have learned that it really does take a village so I am not as stoic. If someone offers assistance I generally take it now.

Having groceries delivered is also a huge help! Yes there is a cost but it is justifiable when you consider the cost of gas, your time and sanity.

Adrienne - posted on 08/19/2010

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I found it hard going from one child to two children. Especially since mine are exactly 12 months apart to the day. It was a lot easier to go from two to three kids. We just have to keep reminding the older boys that the baby is to little to do certain toys or games. My boys are 3 years, 2 years, and soon to be 5 months old. It's exhausting but it's a lot easier when I went from one to two kids.

Lisa - posted on 08/18/2010

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Candi,
Isn't it amazing how our body decides to just change from what the doctors said it could do!

I was told since I was 16 years old that I was infertile and could possibly have a chance getting pregnant using in vitro. Imagine my surprise when I went in for my yearly physical and the doctor looking up with a surprised look on his face and saying, you're pregnant, how did that happen?
We laughed about having baby #2 and baby #3 came while I was on birth control!

I know I'll love this baby no matter how anxious I am about trying to survive and wishing for the day I can use the bathroom without a child in there with me.

Candi - posted on 08/18/2010

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after about a month, you won't remember what life was like without baby #3. My first two were planned. They had to be. I could not ovulate so I was on fertility treatments and we planned them to be close together to make things easier. They are 16 months apart. Boy and a girl. We were done! Then my husband deployed for 15 months, came back and guess what?? Yep....I thought it was my ulcer! Wrong!! No fertlity treatments needed, no period the month I got pregnant, and even had a period when I was 2 months along, so imagine my surprise when we were certain we would have another baby. There is a 5 yr gap there. It was easy slipping right back intot he routine and it became as normal as breathing. Good luck

[deleted account]

Jennifer and Lisa! I'm with you guys lol everyone says it will be fine and I will survive but I'm not so sure! I'm due in dec with #3 and I'm so scared with a 3yr old, and a will be 21 month old how I'm going to keep my head on! Not to mention everytime I get close to everyother day showers lol another kid comes along! I am starting to get excited because my other two are girls and this one is a boy!

Cindy - posted on 08/18/2010

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I have a 3.5 year old (March 1st 2007), a 2.5 year old (February 19th 2008), and a 6 month old (February 8th 2010). The first two weeks are slightly scary, but after that, you fall into your routine. I can promise promise promise you that it will be okay! Don't be afraid to ask for help. I always felt weird about asking people to come over and just hold the baby & entertain the kids while I could shower or do dishes.

Jennifer - posted on 08/18/2010

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thank u very much for the comments, lisa i'm in the same boat with my daughter she is currently 17 mos and obsessed with mommy, so i hope she can get over that soon, my husband works 2 jobs so i'm by myself all week, then on the weekend he is here to help. i'm very excited but scared its going to be overwhelming:)

Lisa - posted on 08/18/2010

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I thought it would be fun to have 3 until I found out I was pregnant. I'm due in January and when we found out I was pregnant, I realized I'd have a 4 year old, a 2 year old and a newborn. My soon to be middle child is very clingy and jealous when it comes to me and I still wonder how in the heck I'm going to handle three! My partner travels about half the month for work so that makes it stressful too knowing that I'm on my own for half the month.

[deleted account]

I'm in the same boat. :) I'm getting ready to have my third child, though my current youngest is 5. My EDD is August 28th, so I'm pretty much ready to pop. I'm not nervous about having a third child, but I'm more nervous about the timing. School is starting back up soon, and I'm a little worried if I go beyond my EDD, since my two will be in school. What's making you nervous? :)

Valerie - posted on 08/20/2010

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Thanks for all the comments! I went on this as my hubby and I are discussing the possibility of trying for a third child next year. It's helpful to read about everyone's experiences! Thanks! :)

[deleted account]

I'm in the same boat. :) I'm getting ready to have my third child, though my current youngest is 5. My EDD is August 28th, so I'm pretty much ready to pop. I'm not nervous about having a third child, but I'm more nervous about the timing. School is starting back up soon, and I'm a little worried if I go beyond my EDD, since my two will be in school. What's making you nervous? :)

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